Anyone want to join me in a waiting to conceive thread ? Anyone else really broody but can't TTC yet ?

[Hobnob76]

Hi everyone! Hubby and I are desperately broody and have been for a few years. We're hoping to TTC later this year, we're having to wait til Hubby finishes his degree as we just can't afford to have a baby whilst he's a student. Am wanting to come off the pill round about May, and hopefully TTC about Nov/Dec. Want to come off the pill a few months early as I've been on it for over 14 yrs, and would like to know what its like to have normal periods!

Be nice to know if anyone else is in a similar situation.

Hi all, I'm back on here again. I've had Lletz treatment now to remove the part of my cervix with the abnormal cells, they had to remove quite a large area as it was hard for them to pinpoint the exact location of the abnormal cells. I've been told I can ring the hospital after 3.30 today and the results should be back - my best case scenario is that they've removed all the abnormal cells and they are pre-cancerous - no more treatment needed just check ups, but worse case scenario is that they discover cervical cancer and I'll need more treatmant. So fingers crossed tightly.
I also don't know how long to wait until TTC if they say its ok, I was initially told 6 weeks to recover, then told that would only be superficial recovery should allow longer, then told 6 weeks would be fine! I'm going to see my Dr in a couple of weeks though and talk to him about it. Consultant also told me not to wait too long as at my age (33) it would probably take 12-24 months to conceive anyway - this surprised me-thought it'd be less than that. Only took 2 mths with dd, although that was 5 yrs ago. But I'll discuss this with my Dr too.
One thing to check before ttc is that your smears are up to date, I was on time and that should've helped, but you don't want to put these things off.
I thought I'd also mention for those of you coming off the pill for the first time, I was on for 11yrs, the first month I came off the pill I had all sorts of strange aches and pains, tender breasts, pelvic pains etc - I was convinced I was pregnant, but I wasn't its just the hormones settling down apparently.
I need to concince dh to go for no2 aswell, hes still a bit worried about it. I don't even know if I can yet, but I have to think about it to distract myself from worrying about my results. Had to sit in the car and cry after seeing the little baby clothes in Tesco the other day.
So fingers crossed. I'll be back here later with my results hopefully.

My husband and I really want to start a family but as ever work is a bit complicated. I started a new job last September, but I am actually on unpaid research leave until next September (and being paid by another source for the research). At my new employers you have to have worked there for twelve months by your expected week of delivery in order to you qualify for full maternity pay. So I thought that meant that I would have to wait until December 2010 to start ttc. But I took the plunge and phoned the HR department today and they said that I can count the year from last September. So technically I could start from now.

The only problem is that the pay is calculated on my average weekly earnings in the eight weeks before the 'qualifying date', which is itself fifteen weeks before the due date. So I have to be on the payroll at least 23 weeks before the birth ... By my calculations this means we can start trying in May.

I feel a bit mad!

garvbuck that sounds v complicated, glad you're getting your head round it better than I am.... I remember talking to friends on short term contracts who reckoned there was a particular window you had to get pregnant in in order to get full maternity pay, similar kinds of complicated calculations!

LittleB, really hope the results are good news.

My books arrived in the post this morning, so that's more things to distract me from work/housework/anything else I ought to be doing.... I keep having to bite my tongue to not start talking about babies with people I don't want to be then waiting for any signs I'm pregnant (or at least no more so than they probably are anyway).

Should start final pill packet tomorrow and am so tempted just to ignore it and get on with ttc, but I need to remember the reasons we decided waiting till the very end of the year was a good idea. Then I think that as the chances of me getting pregnant in the first month can't be that high anyway it doesn't really matter.....

Oh and welcome Littlemissmuppet. They all seem like entirely natural things to be concerned about - I'm hoping to ttc number 1 so don't know from experience so won't try and offer advice, but I'm sure there are plenty of people around who can.

Littlemissmuppet - I have a DD of 15months & I feel like she needs to have a sibling. But sometime I feel bad that she won't have much alone time with me if we have #2 soon. And sometimes I think it would be better for her to have a sibling close in age. I think you just have to go with gut instinct and what feels right for your family. From what people have said to me, you just sort of adapt to having more than one, and you find the time to give them individually in different ways.

LittleB - fingers crossed for you.

garvbuck - that sounds v complicated! When pg with DD I just knew that I needed to be employed for 23 weeks before EDD to qualify for smp (which by the way is a ridiculous amount & is a disgrace) But I worked for my FIL so I knew he was not going to be too mean about sticking to rules! Still technically employed by same company, but there is no work for me, so I am a SAHM and not earning. It's very confusing! Plus I have long term health problems which is making it difficult to find suitable work now. Nothing out there with flexible hours at all!

Ocarina - if you had valid reasons not to TTC before the end of the year then it would absolutely be sods law that you would be PG straight away. Life always seems to throw things at me that way!

see, that logic just makes me more tempted to go for it! (It wouldn't be a disaster if I was pregnant by the end of the year, just various reasons it seemed more sensible to wait, but I'm getting so impatient)

Thanks Ocarina and bebejones! Bebejones, I know exactly what you mean. I sincerely regret not having a second baby sooner, but alas it was out of my control. For me, the main thing is providing a well balanced, happy family, and I truly do believe you can have the right balance with two kids. And as for no.1 missing out on the attention, I think as they get older they need less and less from you and start interacting with you as a person rather than a little toddler that just wants attention from you. I know my dd will absolutely love a sibling and will do anything to "help", so I plan on putting her to work from the first moment ;-) She'll be able to get nappies and bits and bob's while I'm stuck feeding or such! I think my mind is 99% made up that I want to go for it, but now, as ever, it's all about timing. Do we wait for the new year and then just go for it, or do we try get our finances a bit more settled? Here's hoping for a blinding flashing light of realisation!

Bebejones I'm sure something will come up and you'll get some work. Sounds lovely being at home though.

Anyway, my day of calculations is over. Six packets of pill to go, by my reckoning (starting pack one today...). Feels like ages, but it'll go quickly. Have to finish a huge project in the next few months anyway, so timing is probably right.

My husband is so excited! He thought we'd have to wait into our thirties because of our careers, etc, but we are both 27 so that gives us plenty of time to sneak one in before the big 3-0, fingers and toes all crossed!

Six packets to go...

On the issue of having children with big gaps between them, I really don't think it is a problem at all. My mum remarried when I was sixteen and my brother was thirteen and her new husband has a daughter eleven years younger than me - it was absolutely great. I don't think there's any ideal family pattern - anything can work if you want it to

Hi all, I had good news, they found the abnormal area of cells which they had completely removed, so I'm in the clear. Thankfully it was pre-cancerous - but only just, if I'd delayed my smear it could've easily become cancer. I feel so lucky!
I'm seeing my Dr in a couple of weeks to see how long he recommends we wait before ttc. I'm hoping I can start trying in Feb, as I'm desperate to stop taking the pill, but will follow drs advice.
Garvbuck, sounds like you've had loads of calculations to work out! I was 29 when I had my dd, pleased to have snuck her in before I was 30, aiming for the next one before I turn 35 if possible, I'm 33 now.
Littlemissmuppet, like you I think the fact that there will be a larger age gap might help as dd will want to help look after a baby. I'll also have time alone with a baby as dd has just started school, but then closer together would've had benefits too. We just have to make the best of circumstances, there'll be pros and cons whatever you do I think. we are also worried about finances, but I think we will manage.
I think bebejones you're so right, you have to go with your instinct for your family and will adapt to whatever you do anyway.
Must go and daydream about baby stuff while I'm supposed to be working.

That's great news LittleB (and definitely a reminder to keep up to date on smears). Hope the doc says you can start ttc soon.

Hey girlies - it feels like ages since I was last on, work's been manic. It's also nice to read I'm not the only one carefully calculating dates for pay and maternity leave. Also there never seems to be a right time to ttc, I'm new to my role and want to get settled, but worked so hard that I don't want to throw away quals which would mean another move in a few months. Hopefully when I'm pregnant, which I have no idea how will go down!

Pidgin - thanks for the info, I'm ringing the midwife at my surgery tomorrow for a chat and will ask about rubella. Started taking the folic acid straight after reading this, will have been taking it for about 7 weeks by the time anything could possibly happen anyway, so should be ok.

Congratulations LittleB that's great news, so pleased for you. Fingers crossed you can ttc soonest!

I'm counting down the days to last pill, 2 more tablets to go. Not ttc in dec, but Jan, and want a month of at least trying to pay attention to what happens when! Is it sad how excited I have been this week to stop taking the pill, and that I am counting down the days? I think I've been more excited about that than it coming up to Christmas!

Sorry to go on, bit of an outpour on the work front, didn't intend to chat about it here but so nice to finally be able to talk freely about it, with others in the same situation, without boring/terrifying husband!!

And lastly, not to plug their book, but the Mumsnet book on pregnancy is really interesting, helpful and had me laughing in bed. It's even intrigued the other half, which can't be a bad thing....

xx

Thanks, no its not sad to be counting down the days on your pills! I would do the same - I've been counting my packs and really hope I don't need another pescription - current ones will take me through to March, would really like to start ttc in Feb if Dr says its ok. It is too difficult to try and plan I think - I've been trying to work out dates so I could have mat leave for dd(4) school summer holidays, but as it could take ages to conceive anyway I think we'll just go for it!

Am so excited I think I may burst! We might, possibly, maybe, sort of had a bit of luck with our finances. V long story, but would essentially mean we could clear alot of our debts before the New Year!!! So.....if this happens, I might, possible, maybe, sort of be able to talk DH into TTC before May, maybe even in Jan! Still not made my mind up!! But very excited that it could be on the cards (maybe) earlier than anticipated. There are other factors, but this one is/was the biggest!

Sorry to be me me me, but very excited and needed to let it out somewhere!

congratulations bebejones, that's very exciting! January is less than a month away, after all! What good news.

Glad to hear your good news too, LittleB, it's great that it was picked up early enough. Hope you're able to start TTC soon too!

bluetit I empathise with the excitement about the last pills thing - I'm really excited that this is the final cycle before TTC, it's even making me not mind too much about period pain! (Now that's something I preferred about being on the pill...)

welcome to newbies and hope everyone's doing well.

Bebe, that sounds very promising! I know that most of the conversations I've had with my dh recently have been about finances... I am of the 'things will work themselves out' school of thought but luckily he is more pragmatic.

Pidgin I don't know if the B6 has had an effect yet because I've only been taking it for about a month. I'm not incredibly familiar with my cycle yet (although rapidly getting better!) so I don't really have enough data yet. I just wanted to get as much of the sensible stuff in place (blood tests, folic acid etc) before we dive into ttc. It's keeping me occupied and stopping me from scaring dh!

That said, he's been at work and I've just spent the last hour watching birth videos on youtube...oh the shame!

littleb, glad to hear your good news. How often are we supposed to have smears? Can't remember when my last one was...

I turned 29 a couple of weeks ago, would be great to have a baby as a 30th birthday present!

It is lovely to be all excited together on here! I would go mad without it. I so want the mumsnet pregnancy book so I can start reading up but thought dh would kill me. After a few glasses of wine last night I did drop a hint to dh last night. I have one more week left of my present pack and then one more pack and then I stop taking my pill yippeee! Going to have 3 months letting my cycle get back to normal and then we can start. Also got my god daughter who is 2.5 coming to stay with us all weekend (without her parents) can't wait as we have so much fun with her when she comes to stay doing all the little things like making cakes with her(then dh icing them again behind her back as he is such a perfectionist they have to be perfect!)although makes me terribly broody and I miss her so much when she goes home!

been to see the Nurse Practitioner this morning (have a uti ) and had a chat about coming off the pill and how long to wait before TTC. I explained that my cycle never settled last time (until after i had ds) and she said not to bother waiting and to just get on with it. Waiting for 3 normal cycles, as recommended by most GP's, is more to make it easier for them with dates......

So.....DP is away until next week but then the TTC begins

yay for all the excitement - bebejones that sounds like great news, hope it means ttc can soon begin. And queenrollo that is vv exciting, not jealous at all.... (just ever impatient).

I keep thinking about Christmas and thinking that hopefully next year we'll be celebrating baby's first Christmas, or more likely that I'll be pregnant. I then occasionally start going into 'what ifs' and I do know it might not all be plain sailing, but I guess I'm going for hopeful and excited.

Am now into final pill pack (I decided to be good and not ditch them early....) and pregnancy books (which dh is despairing about but never mind).

Hello everyone, I'm new

Also waiting to TTC - got married in September and have since managed to force hubby to talk about babies. I'm going to be coming off the pill after Christmas, and fingers crossed will be preggers soon after! There are pregnancies abounding at work at the minute which is all very exciting so I am really winding myself up wanting to join the club!

I will be starting my last pill pack on Tuesday, and then the countdown will really begin! Can't wait! Hopefully time will fly for everyone on this thread and we'll be getting BFPs ASAP!

Hey girls! New to mumsnet so go easy on me lol.

I'm also excitedly waiting to TTC. Been with my partner for nearly 2 years officially but close friends for a decade, we're both majorly broody atm. Been talking lots about marriage and babies and we've decided to ditch the condoms from January (not been on pill for a couple if years now as it stopped agreeing with me).

Until then we're spending lots if time with my god daughter who is 4months and so lovely!

We're all planned out on the working out maternity pay and all the financial logistics so it's just a little wait 'til we can get cracking! Anyone have any tips or advice?

• Roo

Hi Kirstieroo and evilgiraffe, welcome to your link to sanity!

Ocarina I know exactly what you mean about Christmas broodiness...been talking to a colleague about his new-born son and all the preparations for baby's first christmas. Ah, that phrase makes me feel all glowy inside

Oh ladies, I need you all to slap some sense back into me! Dh and I got -um- very intimate last night, and unlike last month he didn't get all sensible at the crucial moment...and as far as I can tell (thank you, mn ovulation calculator ) I'm in the middle of my fertile period!

Anyhoo, now I'm starting to obsess. Been sitting at work thinking I could be pg . Sensible me think it's hugely unlikely (literally the first time we've ever had unprotected sex) and anyway the timing's not great as would be a late august due date. But silly me....well, she's thinking something quite different

So, knock some sense back into me please!!

Thanks kawaiiko! Nice to join you all

I am getting really broody recently as a friend at work has told me she's 10 weeks gone - this is unsurprisingly still a secret at work, but it's killing me not to talk about it! I am so excited and delighted for her and her husband (to the point that I couldn't sleep on the night she told me), and I want to join the fun now! I am literally bouncing every day, but thankfully have so far managed to keep my mouth shut even when talking to/about the other pregnant lady in the office... Am panicking about letting on - major faux pas if I do so am probably talking less about pregnancy than usual, which may well be sounding alarm bells for colleagues about me! Arrrgh!

It is amazing how having pregnant people around you all day can really affect how you feel! I have known we were going to TTC in January since our wedding, but suddenly it's December and I can't wait!

It's sort of maddening and sort of brilliant at the same time - at least January is closing in fast now!

Oooo, that was a lot of exclamation marks, but hey I've had half a bottle of wine and it's Friday night so who cares eh

Oooh, more people ttc-ing in Jan, much excitement

kawaiiko, I could find a brick and bash you over the head to try and knock some sense in, but it's so much more fun to join silly you in thinking how exciting even the possibility of being pregnant is. Sorry, that wasn't v helpful was it....

It's good to be excited I really can't wait to start trying. Think about it every day. Have to bite my tongue not to talk about it as could talk about it 24/7. My 2.8 year old godaughter is staying with us this weekend. Apparently she has been bouncing off the walls with excitement about it apparently, didn't feel I could admit that I had been the same! Off to see father christmas tomorrow and Christmas farmers market and then "helping" in my parents village to put Christmas lights up and then pick out out christmas tree so an action packed christmassy day with her. I can't wait! I want to start ttc now so unfair we have to wait a bit longer!

Welcome to the mad house Kirstieroo & Evilgiraffe!!!

Kawaiiko - consider yourself slapped!! I would be exactly the same as you though and would be obsessing over every little twinge of anything!

Florin - hope you are having a lovely weekend with your Goddaughter.

I am away at my mums for a few days so it's tricky to get on and obsess over TTC! She wants me to have more babies though so at least I can tell her I want another one, although being away with DD on my own makes me think I would be made to have one so soon. She is such a handful, she is like a mini whirlwind & just doesn't stop all day! I'm exhausted. How would I cope being pregnant let alone with a toddler & a new born? Excitement has died down now as it dawned on me again that I need to lose some more weight before TTC. Keep having very conflicting thoughts about when would be the right time...is there a right time?

Oooops - mad to have one so soon! Not made!