Ignoring the LIES, DAMNED LIES, and STATISTICS: Fiesty & Fabulous 40+ers TTC

[xserialshopper]

Open to all 40+ers TTC.

We're friendly - not cliquey (sp?) and would love to know you{smile]

Well still no sign of AF but have spent most of today throwing up and my DH keeps telling me that the titty fairy has paid us a visit again (don't you just love men?) I'm inclined to agree with him as none of my normal bras are fitting at the moment and I've resorted to wearing one of my old maternity bras. (When I was pg with DD I went up 2 cup sizes in a week shortly after finding out I was expecting)

DH wants me to go to the doctors tomorrow - he seems to think the GP would have more sophisticated testing kit but I know from last time they'd just send me away to buy a kit. Think I need to leave it until a week has passed since the last one and then test again.

Ho hum..

Feeling a little low today, and need to have a rant. I took DS to meet a friend's week old baby, and we were joined for lunch by another close friend, who announced that she is pregnant, as is another woman we know. We all met when we had our first kids, and about 10 out of 14 of them now have their second, or are pregnant. When I told DH tonight about that punched-in-the-gut feeling that I had to get over pretty damn quickly to give them my congratulations and (truly) heartfelt good wishes, he said "I wouldn't have thought you were like that. I can't understand how you're feeling - but then, I'm not a jealous person".

I'm not jealous, I'm thrilled for them, and I know that them getting pregnant doesn't mean that we won't, and it's not a race and blah, blah, blah ...

I just wished that he could have given me a hug and said something like "oh, sweetheart". Sanctimonious wanker.

But no, he has to make me feel petty and selfish. And I'm still sad.

Rant over.

Sorry to read about other sadness here, too. But when I see the occasional BFP here, it fills me full of hope, so keep them coming.

Men are so insensitive sometimes K. I know that feeling so well and when you are feeling left out as you describe it's truly horrible.

We all need cheering up I think.

kiwikat - sorry to hear that your dh made you feel worse rather than better. It is so tough hearing others good news without thinking about your own desires, it is not selfish, but natural. Lets hope we have more bfps here soon.

Nan - sorry to hear your sad news, hope that you are taking care of yourself and that others around you are supporting you.

Spiral - yep ho-hum, but hope you get your good news this week.

I am currently waiting for ov to appear, but dh is being fantastic at the moment, following the ch4 program on the life of sperm, he is much more tuned into what we are trying to achieve, and is in awe at the miracle of making a new life!

Hi all

Cd 22 for me and 10dpo - being stupid with the symptom spotting so trying not to acknowledge any of them won't stop the pain when I have the red wipe of doom

Just want to wish itofr good luck for the scan today .... can't wait to hear the news.

Take care all

xx

ITFOR - fingers crossed for the scan.

I'm still throwing up so who knows. Any ideas as to how long to leave it before testing again? I was thinking a week but is it worth testing before then? Spotted another thread on here where people were talking about how long they'd gone on testing -ive before their pg was confirmed and it looks like I've still got a way to go to get the record

ITOFR -good luck for the scan
spiral - can't suggest anything helpful but admire you for staying sane with what is going on. FX that it is good news for you.
Rowing - I know from experience that travel is one thing that can mess AF up good and proper and that is a lot of flights and stress. Plus all the emotional stress of the appointment. Have you heard back from the clinic ? What happens next ?
nan - hope you are coping OK and am thinking of you.
kiwi - all I can say is 'men !' (rolls eyes). Sometimes they just speak before engaging their brains. Don't feel bad, you might have found it hard but you were able to be happy for your friend and thats to be admired.

Had my day 3 bloods Saturday and scan is this afternoon so hopefully will have some results this week. Trying to do the glass is half full thing and not really succeeding !
Really feeling quite sick at the moment !

Hi all,

Just signing in to wish ITOFR the best for your scan, fx all is well. This would be a lovely time to have a healthy and happy pg so really hoping to hear exciting news.

As promised, I am a bit more positive about everything today. I am pampering myself with a light work schedule until scan Thurs when the next wave of devastation will sink in. Have brought date forward so that any follow up can be done before the weekend. (when EPU and gynae ward closed).

Kiwi, as you say, it's not about jealousy is it really? I feel for me it's more about unmet need and unfulfilment. Perhaps your dh just needs more talk to enable him to appreciate the difference, and then maybe he could relate better to what you are trying to express? Hope I'm not barking (up the wrong tree) out of turn.

Spiral, what is going on with you? Not sure I could be so patient.....have you tested yet?? Apparently, to all who feel sick, this is a very good sign of a viable pg. The sickness is your body reacting protectively towards the foetus.

Not entirely sure that "sane" and "spiral" should be used in the same sentence! Am symptom spotting with a vengeance and swinging from optimism to pessimism all the time. Very hormonal and I don't do hormonal so does that mean? Etc, etc

Nan if only I knew the answer to that! glad to hear you're sounding brighter and will be thinking of you later in the week

PS: not tested yet as can't get to the shops today but will soon. With DD I threw up on all bar 30 days of the pregnancy and she was 16 days late, 8lb 2oz and had vast quantities of hair (and didn't lose either weight or hair after she was born). No nausea just vomiting with DD though. At the moment I'm suffering from both.

Nan - so sorry

Scan is wed girls, so don't get too excited yet. Have been feeling more pg (nauseous, tired, sore boobs) so am hoping this is a good sign. However, had the meerist hint of bright red blood at the weekend which freaked me out. Only once, but still... Will just have to wait until Wed and take it as it comes.

Spiral - sounds hopeful.

Kiwikat - men can be such wankers. Sometimes I despair of DH in exactly the same way. They just don't get it.

Thanks for the positive support, everyone. Your responses have made me smile. My lovely gay friend J knew just what to say, too - nothing! He just gave me a squeeze.

Nan - so sorry.

Spiral, it really sounds like the real deal, doesn't it? Fingers crossed.

ITOFR - looking forward to hearing that the scan went well.

And for the rest of us, some words of wisdom from Dory (in Finding Nemo) that I think are particulary apt in our cases ... just keep swimming, just keep swimming ...

Hi everyone!
Kiwi, sorry to hear that you were having a hard time. I hope you are feeling better today.
Beam are there any results back yet? Are you still feeling sicky?
ITOFR it's so great one of the 'old girls' has a bfp, hope it all goes well tomorrow.
Nan are you OK? Stay strong for the end of the week, I hope it all goes very smoothly.
Rainbow, your DH sounds like a star. It's great he is taking such an interest.
Spiral any news yet?
Dixie any new symptoms today?
Fifi how are you?
My news is that I went for a scan yesterday and the cyst I had is shrinking. Must just be prone to them. I have read cysts can be caused by too much oestrogen, but past caring.
They also took another day three blood and I have to phone tomorrow for results. I hope the FSH is still below 10.
I am now taking the pill 'Marvelon'. Has anyone taken this, any side-effects?
I have only ever used barrier methods, didn't fancy taking the pill so don't know much about it.
The doctor in Hungary is supposed to be sending me a schedule for the treatment, but he hasn't yet! Hurry up!

Rowing No news here yet, still tired, nauseous and feeling like AF about to appear any minute but no backache or stomach cramps. Have been out and bought test though so we'll see what tomorrow brings.

Used to use Marvelon but that was about 15 years ago so not sure that the formulation will be the same. Back then it was fine apart from being good for gaining weight.

I think we can all empathise with wanting to just get on with the treatment. Perhaps we should all be sending messages telepathically to your Hungarian doctor...

Hi all

Spriral fingers crossed that you keep feeling sick ... only those ttc could ever understand the sincerity of that senitiment

Hope the schedule gets here soon Rowing - positive vibes coming your way!

Nan thinking of you still - never an easy time and you are right to go easy on yourself!

Haven't deliberately left anyone out just still getting to know all the names

Anyway I'm feeling a little (read a lot) sad as had my first brown wipe of doom today, my first indicator that af it flying in imminently - real pain because that would make my cycle only 23 days! Feeling very old and stupid at the moment, gone are the days when dh and I just had to think about "the deed" and I would be pregnant. Trying not to feel sorry for myself (I have no right).

Will stop the maudling and know that give it a couple of days I will be making excuses about why we should have just "one more" go at ttc again

In the meantime buckets of babydust and luck to all.

xx

Forgot to ask I'm 44.5 am I the oldest in the group?

Rowing - I'm Ok thanks. PMT symptoms with AF due Friday ish. Only managed 1 BD before holiday which was 4-5 days before OV so not expecting anything this month tbh.

Hope all goes well for you. Had to laugh at your comment about being 'past caring'. Made me laugh. I know what you mean!

Dixie I am 45 so no you are not the oldest! I liked how you said you would be giving it 'one last try' once again. I have one last try every month too! Not sure when I'll give up - probably when I'm 60 at this rate!

To eveyone else, including those with hope for BFPs - good luck lovely ladies!!!!!

Sorry you're feeling sad, Dixie. Glad the cyst is getting smaller, Rowing Boat.

Thanks for all the good wishes. Kepp everything crossed. Will let you know tomorrow pm.

Dixie, sorry you're feeling down, weird cycles mess with your head. I'm on what seems to be my third dodgy cycle in a row and seriously wondering if I've become a reproductive cul-de-sac, IYSWIM. At least if AF is early you can try again sooner

Kiwikat that all sounds horrible, I so know what you mean, its not jealousy just really hard to cope with sharing someone else's joy over the one thing you desperately want. Men are really so rubbish sometimes.

Spiral lots and lots of luck with that test and Rowing I hope you get to start the program asap...

Nan, still thinking of you, keep up the pampering and I hope people in RL are taking good care of you. ITOFR - will be thinking of you and your scan tomorrow.

Best of luck to everyone with hopes for this month. Have no clue where I'm at, maybe I OV'd maybe I didn't and now its cd 20 and I have cramps

Oh dear Dixie. Hope AF stays away.
Finger crossed for tomorrow ISTOFR!!!!
You never know Fifi...
Kiwi thank you! How are you today?
Thanks for the info Spiral - have been very hungry today, so I can see where the weight thing comes from. Also k-nackered, just so tired, I don't know if it is all the stress of the flights and no sleep/clocks changing catching up. Marvelon can't make you feel tired can it?? Must do a Google.
So tomorrow is the test day Spiral - can't wait to hear how you get on.
Still no word from the beeping doctor, so have just emailed. It's a pain because I need to organise annual leave. Tut!

Ooo missed you GPS, we must have cross-posted.
Are things still a bit up in the air with your cycle?

Dixie - we all know that sadness and hope you feel better soon. Don't worry I'm 46 so you're just a spring chicken

ITFOR - lets hope it's good news all round tomorrow. FX

Night all...

ITOFR - hope all goes well today. Thinking about you.

It's a new month, it's spring, it's gotta be good for the rest of us!

Hi all

BFN from the test this morning but got an emergency appointment with the GP between bouts of throwing up. She's taken bloods as we don't know if/when I ov'd and she's as suspicious as the rest of us that the symptoms are all pointing towards pg. Should have results late Friday/Monday.

She couldn't find any evidence of cysts but if result comes back negative and no sign of AF for another two weeks have to go back for an internal.

Over to you ITFOR - really hope it's all good news for you.