emmsys room...only a few left...we WILL graduate the final few :-)

[QueenyEisGotTheBall]

hi ladies
here is a nice new thread with some nice brand spanking new bags of baby dust....
() (**)
i will bring our list over in a sec after i have linked
COME ON GIRLS WE WILL GET TO THAT ANTENATAL THREAD BEFORE EMMSY POPS!!!!!!!
xx ei xx

We're through but they can't see us until 9pm tonight. Better late than never really. The next hours won't be much fun.

Sparkly It sounds as though you're particularly badly served by the NHS in your area It is routine to them unfortunately, although some are better than others at dealing with women suffering mc/threatened mc. Not that you are necessarily I hasten to add. Several ladies on the Knickercheckers thread have bled really heavily in early pg and gone on to have successful pregnancies and healthy babies. As long as it is only spotting and there's no cramping then hopefully this is just a worrying time to get through. I really feel for you though I hope DP can get you a private scan appointment if not today then tomorrow at the latest to put your mind at rest.
I knew Dr Kate would be able to help with the hcg stuff
Sorry to hear you've been having such a horrible time as well in recent days and all the bureaucratic hurdles to jump through can't have helped. When do you get the result? I'm glad the GP you saw was reassuring. Fingers crossed this result is clear (it can depend on so many things)... Definitely not what you need at the moment after all you've been through this year
Fingers crossed the napalming worked One of the ladies on my AN thread had an ERPC and her bean survived so try not to worry about today's procedure... (((Hugs))) to you.
On a brighter note, I'm still planning to come along to the meet-up Just tell me where and at what time! I'm on the Essex/Suffolk border - Teehee is a bit further up the train line from me

X-posted - glad you got an appt Sparkly. The beauty of going private - they work almost round the clock Fingers crossed for a good result but agree that the next few hours are going to be tough...

Oh god - big hugs to all Emmsy's ladies today as we seem to need them at the moment.

Kate I am nearly crying for you - I want to drive to you and give you a big hug - mind you I also want to drive to Cardiff and give Sparkly a big hug too. You sound so fed up. Now young lady stop apologising for me me me posts or I will have to wag my finger at you in a very school marmish (?) type way. You seem to be getting more than your share of crapness but you seem so strong and even though it may not feel like it right now I am confident that you are going to get through it all. I am right in thinking the results will be with you in 6-8 weeks?

I keep changing my mind about the meet up but might have to come now just to give you a hug!

I feel the same thing with both of you in that there is always this agonising waiting around for answers and whilst I'm sure it will all be fine you are left in limbo while trying to find out which is awful.

Sparkly The lack of feeling makes me so , it brings back so many feelings and it really pisses me off that they can be so blase about it all. As if a threatened m/c makes you think it's OK. As for the GP, why can't they just say they don't know what they are talking about rather than fobbing you off with bedrest. As Kate says doesn't make a difference but might make a difference to how you feel which is important too. Kate Lesley Regan talks about that in her book (don't know if you've got to that bit yet!)

sparkly Also x-posted so glad that you got a scan - it will be hard to wait but you may be able to go to bed tonight with some comfort - here's hoping. See I told you there were stories of bleeding with no probs? Any more pain?

Cricri I am also glad Dr Kate on hand with the right words as usual or Wise Dr Kate as I like to call her. Are you going on the train on the 20th?

Thanks ladies,
Am feeling quite tender but not sure if that's due to sitting in bed ... I keep thinking I'm getting cramps but not sure if I'm looking for them IFYWIM...I might not think twice about the pains normally. I also haven't felt up to eating or drinking anything today..Have only managed a biscuit and a few sips of water so that prob isn't helping.
Please keep you fingers crossed...I know I am prob clutching at straws but I suppose there is still a small amount of hope. I'm trying to be realistic though and prepare myself for the worst...at least by doing this I won't have too much of a shock later on.
Thank you all again xxxxx

Sparkly there is still much more than a small amount of hope . Things could very well be absolutely fine. Cricri is right, you just need to be in whatever place is best for you, and if that's your bed then you stay there. Is there anything you can think of that you could manage to eat or drink? That can make you feel pretty peculiar in itself after a while. In spirit I am propped up against the pillows next to you, hogging to duvet (Don't worry, in spirit I am wearing my pj's, this isn't going to turn into some dodgy ladies-in-bed-together party, you're a very pretty lady, but you're just not my type ) I'll be online til we go out at about 6, then I'll be back about 10 to check up on you, and hopefully see the photos of your healthy bean you will have posted on your profile by then.

Teehee & Cricri than you for your kind words. Please do come on 20th, don't make me come and fetch you! My godson lives in Ipswich, can't remember if that's where you are Teehee...? I REALLY need to come and visit him soon... xx

Sparkly I hope you don't mind me staying positive for you. I just re-read your post, and I do know what you mean about trying to prepare yourself for the worst so it's less of a shock if something is wrong, but there is nothing you can do now to make 'the worst' any less painful if it does happen. But it might very well not. You are still pregnant, you are still having a baby until someone tells you otherwise. {{hugs}}

Sparkly Just want to re-iterate what I have been texting to you today, remember I'm sending you my relax vibes. Let me know later how you get on, but I really want to be positive just like Kate for you, if you can't we can be. Kate is very right in saying that you can't prepare for the worst if it does happen hun, not that you will need to as we're are all here sending out positive thoughts for you, I hope time doesn't drag by too slowly for you. Huge hugs x x x
Kate Huge hugs for you too my lovely, cannot believe that this is happening to you after all you have been through already. 2008 has been a shit shit year for so many people, most of us included, I can't believe such crap gets dealt out. This year I've been saying that I must have been someone really horrible in a previous life like Attila the Hun, maybe you were Adolf (Hope you can see the funny side of that!) On the positive side of things, at least this has been caught early and before you are pg, although who knows after your napalming Stop worrying about your posts, we all need "me me me" time so feel free to rant chick as often and as long as you need to, and the amount of marvellous advice you hand out means it all balances out anyway! Sorry the wedding wasn't too good, but LOL at the idea of you throwing some shapes

Just got back from counselling session, I think I want to marry my counseller she is fab We had a lesson on the different parts of our brains, how to deal with emotions with breathing techniques and did some relaxation, I feel like I'm floating. I can't believe I've only got 4 sessions left I think she's far too expensive to go to privately But I've downloaded MP3 tracks from t'internet so I will have a substitute when I finish

Mollie So pleased the counselling is going well - it's important to find somebody you trust and "click" with and it sounds as though you have. The relaxation tracks from the internet will help - my Mum teaches relaxation and has given me some useful tips in the past. She's a healer too - I should ask her to send some healing vibes to everybody
Teehee I'm not sure how I'm going to get to Wimbledon yet. I was actually thinking of driving rather than schlepping about on the train and underground. Might be more comfortable for my back as at least I can use my little cushion in the car and tilt the seat to my preferred angle. I'll let you know though.
Sparkly Thinking of you and I'm also staying positive on your behalf - I'm going to pick up my Mum from the airport but I'll be back later to see how you got on (((Hugs))) to you.

Just off now, but will be on here as soon as I get back!

Just been giving my gorgous gorgeous dog a cuddle, am now worried I may smell vaguely of seagull poo... that's despite the bottle and a half of shampoo DH used on the horrible hound yesterday... nice!

Thank you all. Was just doing some drawing with DD in bed and have sent DP on a journey to get me a KFC..it's taken him an hour so far in traffic.
What ever happens I know I'll get through it. You ladies have helped me more than I could imagine and I feel like the luckiest girl in the world at the moment to have such fantastic friends and a supportive family. Thanks for all your positive vibes. Lots and lots of love to all of you.

Sparkly you know where I am if you need me. {{{{{{{big hugs}}}}}} Please let me knoe how you get on later, I won't sleep till you do!

Kate FFS, I really hope this is the last of your bad luck. You deserve so much. {{{{{{big hugs to you too}}}}}}}

I'm really looking forward to the meet up. I'll be the one rolling down the street. Or you might see me struggling to get out of my car. I feel incredibly large at the moment.

hi ladies
sparkly im thinking of you and sending good sticky bean scan vibes xxxx {{{{{{hugs}}}}}} please let us know how you get on i have all my fingers and toes for you xxxxxxxxx
kate sounds like you have had a crappy time of it recently try not to worry too much about the cervical smear results as the changes dont necessarily mean cancer and they have been very thorough with the further tests etc so anything that needs treatment has been caught at the earliest stage and can be sorted out quite easily. i know that sounds like not exactly good news given how bad your year has been etc but i hope that may have helped in some way to settle your mind for a while at least xx
hi to everyone else
it doesnt look like i will be able to make the meet up on the 20th i am rotad in to work that saturday and as yet cant swap my shift as noone is able to cover but we should be able to sort something out for in a few weeks/months as i can start to book my holidays as of monday
4dpo today
xx ei xx

When I had my miscarriage I had bleeding but no pain my MW told me to go to hospital(it was a sunday) cause I was on hol. they monitored me, blood& urine test and said I had to wait til thurs to come back for a scan. So had a crappy hols couldnt go swimming with DS, etc and had to take it easy. To be told when I went for my scan that they should of told me on the sunday that there was no signs of pregnancy....so I had all that waiting for nothing!! we were so we just packed up and went straight home.
Hope you get ur scan booked soon sparkly and hope its all good- I really feel for you. x

Hi all,
Am back from the lovely private hospital and that was £100 well spent.
It's not good news though I'm afraid....as soon as he scanned me I told him it was a blighted ovum and he told me I was right. The sac is measuring 22mm (about 7 weeks I think). Have now been pushed into NHS for emergency gynae appointment at 8am and have been told I should go in sooner if the pain becomes too much or if I start to bleed heavily. Can either wait for m/c, have tablets and pessary or have an erpc. Not sure what we'll opt for at the moment but am hoping the pain isn't going to get any worse. Thanks for your thoughts and kind words ladies....
You know what? I think this calls for an Emmsy's girls m/c room - what does everyone else think? xxxxx

sparkly im so so so sorry hun xxx im here if you need me at any time xxx i think an emmsys mc room would be a good idea xxx there are unfortunately a few of us here now who would find it a useful place to visit take care of yourself xxxxx
xx ei xx

Sparkly bless you. I'm so gutted for you. Wish there was something I could say...
I don't know if you want advice/opinions on which treatment route to go for (erpc/drugs/nothing) but I'm sure it won't surprise you to know that I have opinions! I had an erpc first time round and it was absolutely the right thing for me, but everyone is different. You must do whatever is right for you.
Wish there was something I could do to take the pain away for you. I've been thinking of you all night, even told DH...
Really hope you get some sleep tonight, and I hope you got your kfc before you went to the hospital! I'm working tomorrow morning but I should be back at lunchtime or soon after.

Ok, I can't help myself. I have to say it. Please think REALLY carefully before you take the drugs route if they're suggesting you take a drug called methotrexate. It's truly horrible stuff, and imo not something you want anywhere near you if you're hoping to convceive again in the near future. The other drug they use is called Misoprostol which I don't know anything about, but if you want to, if you look here I think there's quite a bit of information on it as well as links.

Sending so much love to you and your DP xx

Who would be left here if we had an Emmsy's mc room? Just Fruity or are there some other lucky buggers fortunate people?

Sparkly I am staring at my screen not really knowing what to say. (another long pause while Teehee tries to find the right words) I am so incredibly sad for you both. Please don't feel lonely through all this, we are all here for you. Everyone is different and we can't really know how you feel but we can remember how we felt and that will hopefully help you.

As far as your next decision I think you will instinctively know what is right for you. I also went for the ERPC and it was totally right for me. Very little physical after effects or pain. I figured the less physical trauma the quicker I could deal with the emotions. But like I said you will know I think.

I am back to work today but will be home at about 4:30 if you need anything.

Big hugs to DP as well. I always think the men have to be so brave.

Sparkly I've already given you my opinion regarding which option I preferred, glad to see it was the same as Dr Kate I know you said the other night you didn't want to see anything, if you still feel like that then definately go down the ERPC route, but it's up to you and at least you will be able to make an informed choice. Hope DP is holding up OK, remember you don't have to be strong all the time. Anytime you want to let go whether it's to cry, shout, scream whatever you know where we are hun.
It's so bloody unfair, because of my cynical twisted mind, when 5 of us fell pg within wks of each other I thought to myself oh god I hope one of us doesn't have an m/c. Little did I know it would be me, I thought I'd managed to fill the statistics of 1/4 so I was convinced you would be fine, fck, wnk, t*ss, life is shite
Mollie now steps off her soap box and goes to work, speak later girls

Morning girls

Sparkly Like I said last night, if you need me you know where I am. If you want me to come to Cardiff, I'll be there. I fancy a little weekend away so if you would like me to come over for a weekend of cuddles then I'll be there like a shot. Not sure how you feel about being near preg people at the moment though. Have a think about it and let me know.
I've been thinking of you all night.
I was saying to Ei last night, it just seems so cruel. All of you are such wonderful people and every one of you (I think) has had to go through this at least once. There are so many undeserving parents out there and you try so so hard for something that means so much (and every one of you would/do make the most amazing parents) and it's just snatched away. I just can't get my head around it. I count myself so extremely lucky not to have had to go through this (so far, touch wood).

I think a MC room would be a very good idea. I know if it happened to me I would like it.

Although don't let it stop you all off-loading here, that's what this place is here for I can still be here for you!!

Lots of hugs and kisses to you Sparklyxxxxooooo

"didn't want to see anything" - that was me exactly. Also a big fan of any treatment that doesn't involve any pain and only takes 15 minutes! Love you Sparkly xx

Mornink ladies,

Am back from the hospital. They offered me another scan but it would have been an internal. I declined...I trust what I saw last night and what the consultant said - he even gave us some pictures for the hospital today and I've looked at them so many times and know there's no chance that everything would be ok. We actually saw him whilst grabbing a coffee this morning - he's working for the NHS today and came over and spoke to us. He's such a lovely man..he touched my arm and wished me all the best. It's great that some people have such a lovely bedside manner (unlike my GP who I am directing all my anger at ).
The woman we saw this morning was also very nice and the most motherly person you could ever meet. She told me how brave I was (I only blubbed/snorted when she talked about my DD) and she stood up to comfort me. When I left the room I could hear her talking to the nurse saying, "aww it's so sad" etc so I'm really please that both of the people I've seen have shown so much empathy.
She told us our options...

1. To wait for a natural miscarriage. She said the sac is quite big and may not pop before I pass it. She also believes that my body has retained the pregnancy for so long already and wouldn't want me to wait for another few weeks unless I was happy to.
2. Medical (oral Mifepristone 200mg tablet followed by admission to hospital 2 days later for vaginal Misoprostol 800mg).
3. D&C under GA.

The cramps have stopped for now but I just took 2 co-codamol anyway - not sure why really...just felt like it (stupid, I know) but I don't want to feel too much if the cramps kick off again.

We discussed the lack of bleeding and cramps today - maybe my body has given up trying to expel....

She didn't seem to think there would be a space to get down for an ERPC before Friday of next week - unless an emergency appointment became available first. She suggested that I should book in for the medical miscarriage on Tuesday and then wait and see if an emergency appointment turns up over the weekend...she will phone me by 4pm but I think I'll push for the ERPC (as suggested by the private doctor again this morning).

Sorry for such a long post....and if it doesn't make sense etc. Am back in bed again now. Haven't slept very much for 2 nights so might try and get some shut eye now. Have been told to go straight to emergency gynae if I have any worries and not contact my GP/A&E first.

Thank you for your support. Lots of love to all of you. Thinking of you all xxxxx

Oh Sparkly I've just seen your news and I'm so very sorry I was thinking of you yesterday evening but couldn't stay up after 10pm. I also had a mmc exactly a year ago (although I didn't start bleeding until a few days after it was spotted at the 12 week scan - before then I assumed the pg was progressing normally). It really is horrible
FWIW I went down the "natural" route, although I did have an ERPC booked but in the end all the bleeding happened before the appointment. I was pleased as I really didn't want to have the operation, but that's me. As the others have said, it's totally your decision and you have to do what is right for you. In the event it wasn't as bad as I had feared - like a very heavy AF and I certainly didn't see the sac or anything. The cramps were manageable with ordinary painkillers and lasted a day. I did look into the medically managed option as well but got put off that after reading various posts about it on MN and in any case it was only available privately where I live.
I'm pleased that you've been treated sympathetically anyway as too many times you hear of HCPs being so blase about mc. They forget that they see it every day but that to the woman going through it it's a traumatic experience.
Hope you manage to get some sleep and I also hope DP is bearing up OK. It is difficult for men - they see us suffering and just don't know what to do or say. Their usual "fix-it" approach doesn't work in this case
Take care of yourself and we're here anytime you need us. (((Hugs))) to you.