***Lets support eachother again- you know who you are ***

[mummy2olivia]

charliesmum, nandos, beakas, sugr, cornflower, poppy, becky and everyone else who miscarried in may/june 2008....

We have all been very brave together and supported eachother. For those of us that are ready, it may be time to support eachother again as we return to TTC. Lets hold hands, remember our loss and give a nod to the future as we endeavour to procreate and............

SHAG!!

As promised, a thread to stay in touch. Will also see you on the MC avengers thread.

When you said temping Poppy I thought you meant, as in being a temp! I wondered how that would help you get pregnant! I did some temping once, I did some really, really boring jobs including sorting out forms into two piles for eight hours a day. That was fun...not! Sorry about your AF. Looks like you and I will be back on the bonking bandwaggon this month.

Mbm I know what it is like going back to work, or in my case just going back to the routine seeing all the friends and acquaintances (even the people who worked in the shops, milkman, everyone) who I'd told I was pregnant with such excitement just a few weeks before. It's so hard and you did well just to get through it. I have two children and have had two MCs too. When people ask me about the children I also want to say 'actually I've had four pregnancies' but people don't know how to handle that.

By the way the sea was cold but so invigorating. It was just me and the seagulls.

hello everyone..
feeling a bit low today as my little finger got cut and had to be bandaged
and just to keep update, AF came couple of days back..
MBM, hope u r keeping well.
Becky, glad u had a nice time at the sea.
Poppy, we are now in the 'bonking bandwaggon' like becky said lol
oh btw thx to everyone who keep a little prayer for my cousin..we really need a miracle hes too depressed and not taking his supplements properly cos' he knows theres no hope for him. (we didnt tell him though )
hopefully he will recover soon.. Amen

Hi nandos hope your finger is feeling a bit better now . When I was still working I was the 1st Aid officer and cut fingers (in an office)was the most common injury. One man took the top off (yuk) and I had to bandage it and escort him to hospital couldn't do it now - must be more squeamish with age!

I got a letter from my gp's yesterday asking me to go back and have another set of anticoagulant blood tests done so have just phoned and got a cancellation for mon. Also have appt. next wk with gynae consultant in Edin but letter doesn't say what appt. will be about so just need to wait and see.

Just back from school coffee morning chaos where we were allowed to meet our dc's and go with them for 15mins then they had to go back to class. Popped home to do some hoovering but here I am mnetting.........

Hope you are all feeling ok today. mbs hope work was ok yesterday.

Hi Nandos poor you with your finger.

Poppy you are brave being a first aider...I can't cope with gore at all. Yuck.

Well I'm back on the bonking bandwaggon. First bonk of the month just completed. But its early days so I doubt I'm even fertile yet.

Anyone doing anything exciting this weekend? I'm hoping to go shopping either here or Birmingham. I haven't been shopping for ages and ages. I had a Bad Hair Day today: took the DSs to Asda after school and lost DS2. DS1 and I spent ages scanning the aisles for him and eventually found him near the bakery. Asda is just so huge. My heart was in my mouth for the whole 3 minutes or so (felt like an hour) that we lost him for. He just said 'I couldn't see you mummy!' Poor little thing.

Hello!

Oh Nandos poor you! Hope your fingers isn't too badly cut? Did you have to have stitches? I used to work in a bar, and was cleaning a glass when it shattered in my hand - went straight to docs and had stitches - urgh! Getting stitches can be worse than actually hurting yourself IMO!
I can't imagine how awful it must be for you with your cousin so sick. I am sending you lots of love and strength...

Becky It sounds like getting into that chilly sea did you good. Must've been lovely and peaceful...
Poor you losing DS2, you must've been terrified! It's almost impossibe to keep your eyes on them every second of the day though.

Poppy That's good that you're getting more tests done. Are they checking to see if you have thicker blood? Does that mean you would have to take aspirin next time round? I hope Thursday goes well too.
By the way, i second Becky's 'yuck' for the first aid thing - I have definately not got the stomach for it! Oooohhhh . Makes my knees go funny! Think you are very brave though!

Good luck to all of you coz you're all on the bonking bandwagon this month. Feels v strange not being up there with you. (Obviously not 'with you' with you, coz that would just be strange )

My first week back at work went okay, but am knackered. Is going to take a while to get back into it I think.

Am starting to get my knickers in a twist about my next gynae appt which is three weeks away yet. I've got to go on my own as DH will be away trekking. I'll be getting back the results from our blood tests, and also the tests that were carried out on the baby. I'm shitting myself to be honest. The bill from the pathology lab came yesterday for the tests on the baby. Made me feel really weird and very sad - it just made it sink in that there was actually a little baby inside me that should still be here, but is now not. There must've been a little baby for them to have carried out the tests mustn't there . Feel like screaming.
Am terrified of finding the results out, in case there's something wrong that can't be put right. What if she says I can never have any more children? What on earth would I do?

Hope you're all having a good weekend... Hello too to M2O, just in case you're lurking - was thinking of you last night and hoping that you're okay.

Oh mbs you poor thing. I'm not surprised you are getting anxious about your appt. after all you have been through recently. I'm sure when the time is right for you you will be able to have more children but in the meantime you have got to allow yourself to grieve for your loss of your baby. Is there anyone else who can go with you to get your results if your dh is away?

My gp told me that my bloods had improved a bit from the results in april but he did admit that he wasn't sure what all the reults meant and was going to contact gynae for clarification then out of the blue I get a letter to go back for more bloods with no explanation as to why. Doesn't fill me with confidence

I had a great night on Fri as we took my gran (for her 80th) to see the Psychic to the stars Sally Morgan at Edin Playhouse. She was lovely and spot on with the information she passed to people. I got a signed book can't wait to start reading it but haven't been to well today with my arthritis flaring up. Grrr.

Hi guys, I am lurking. And I'm sorry to see that some of you are having a hard time

MBM- I'm so so sorry about your MC I really hope the tests put any doubts to rest.

Nandos- sorry about your cousin.

Poppy- hope your tests give you some hope.

Becky- I have my fingers crossed that AF wont visit soon!

No news from me- gynae appt is on the 16th oct, have to stay on pill til then. Pain in hips etc has stopped since being on pill which apparently gives a strong indication that it is endo. They may decide to do a laproscopy- fingers crossed that they go in to have a look and there is nothing there and all is normal! not holding much hope out for that though! The pain i was getting for a week or 2 before AF was horrible- cramps, diarrhoea and stabbing pains. I asked GP of MC had caused it and he said he didnt know

Have my fingers crossed for you all and will let you know how things are with me.

Hi Poppy, poor you with your arthritis. Is there anything that makes it worse, or does it just happen for no reason? I know that mum is really badly affected by the weather - if she's cold or damp she literally can't get out of bed. I hope you're feeling better very soon.

It's a bit strange about your blood test - at least you are being referred to a consultant, rather than just staying with a GP who doesn't seem to know what he's doing. Not surprised you're not too confident. Maybe the consultant wants up to date tests done so that on Thursday he can tell you what's going on? Hope so anyway.

That sounds great about the psychic - did she tell you anything? I would love to go to something like that! Did your gran enjoy it? Happy Birthday to her - hope she had a good time celebrating!!!!

You know you said I've got to let myself grieve, well I don't seem to be able to. I think I just can't feel anything any more. This happened when one of my friends died about ten years ago as well - it was a good two years after that before I could emotionally feel anything again. Does that seem normal to you? Am getting a bit worried about it. Very occasionally I get this huge build up of grief and pain, but then I just try to think about something else - I feel like if I start letting it all out it'll never stop, and I'll lose control.
Re appt, there's no-one else to go with me, and also she might be doing an internal scan to see if everything's okay, and I wouldn't want anyone other than DH there for that! Mum said she'd fly over and come with me, but I said no. V sweet of her to offer though. I've got to go straight into work afterwards too, god knows what state I'll be in. We asked to find out the sex of the baby too, and I'm just dreading hearing it, although at the same time I need to. It's just going to make it even more real .

Hi M2O!!! Lovely to hear from you . We miss you and your good advice

I really hope everything goes okay on the 16th and that you get some positive news. Please do let us know what happens as we shall be thinking of you and hoping that you're okay.

Lots of love x

Hi all

M2O good to hear from you . Fingers and toes crossed for your appointment on the 16th. I hope that it all turns out ok.

MBM you know we'd all come with you if we could for the results (although you might not want a load of strange women with you if you are having an internal exam!). I'll be thinking of you. When I had my first MC at 12 weeks (baby 11 weeks) I wanted to know why it had happened and the sex, etc but didn't have the guts to ask and find out. Now I regret that. I really wish I knew. DH didn't want to know at all. Grieving is such a strange thing and so very personal to everyone. Different people cope in different ways. I'd say that I usually like to live in denial land, I certainly did with my MCs. I surrounded myself with people because I couldn't bare to be alone as I knew I'd break down if I was alone. Feeling overcome with emotion is quite a scary prospect.

Oooh Poppy the psychic show sounds fun. When I was 18 I saw a hypnotist and psychic show and I was picked out of the audience and the psychic person went on about how worried I was about my A levels and told me to chill out and it'd be ok! I was so scared to be picked out and my heart was thumping like mad as he spoke to me. He was right, too. I did better than I expected .

Lol at the thought of you all crowding in the room with me , thanks Becky!
My dh is the same as yours - he doesn't want to know what sex it was. Is it too late for you to find out? I would have thought that that would be a basic thing for the doctors to find out about, and they may not have told you about it as obviously it's very upsetting.
I can't bear the thought of losing the plot. I keep on thinking that if I can just keep myself together then hopefully I'll be pg again soon and it'll all seem easier to deal with. Not quite sure where my 'logic' comes from but think it's not too healthy!

I am desperate to be pg again. Have just ov'd and have been asking myself if we should just risk it, but then I remember what's just happened and realise I need to build myself up again. I'm now two stone lighter than I was when I got pg with ds, and am scared that maybe that's the reason for the mc - maybe I didn't have enough reserves? Mind you, I suppose we're all beating ourselves up about something aren't we.

Have to go, love to all xxx

hey everyone..
M2olivia! where have u been?? missed u sorry im just reading though some of the msg cos' its already late here n i need to get some sleep soon
thx for your concern re my little finger its still painful..i thought i needed stitches but i dont have time for it so i used a bandage it got cut on the joint and can't straighten it cos' it hurts..but anywayz its better now
my dh will be coming over on the 1st oct and missed him a lot missed hugging him like my fluffy[stuffed] bunny i know i know im such a baby

okies..will come online again soon..
take care all ..goodnight

Oh I've missed you guys!!!

I will be back soon I promise!!

I just really feel like I needed a little rest from ANYTHING to do with TTC. Dont know if I have totally managed it even though I'm on the pill- I still count the days!! what a nob.

I want you all to cross fingers and toes and hope I get some answers about all this pelvic pain on the 16th.

xxx miss you!!!!

m2o hope it goes well for you on the 16th you. Will be thinking about you.

mbs my arthritis came on suddenly years and years ago after I left my ex dh. Was a very acrimonious split and he was making my life v difficult and I was trying to soldier on regardless even though I was in a terrible state and lo and behold one morning I woke up with a huge swollen knee and it kind of went from there. Now I find that any type of stress/anxiety makes it worse and this year has been filled with that .

Totally understand how hard it is to grieve as well. Different people have their own timescale for it and their own way of dealing with things. I'm kind of a chin up person but over the years have started to give myself time to be sad if I need it because if I don't it usually comes out as a flare up or migraines or like after the last mc when I broke out in hives .

becky the psychic show was really good. We didn't get picked but some of the people who were selected was amazing. When you entered you could fill out a card with a question and it went into a huge bowl on stage which she picked from. She also had snap shots of audience members entering theatre and some of them got chosen. She came up with names, dates and could describe the inside of peoples houses to them. One poor woman she chose was bringing up her sister's ds who had sn after her sister had died. Psychic could tell her that sister had lost an eye and had a blow to the head. Turns out lady was attacked by another woman and killed. The hairs were standing up on my arms.

Poppy that's the same as when I went. My question was 'Will I do well in my A levels?' I wish I can remember what else he said but I remember the hairs standing up feeling as he spoke to me about stuff. It was spooky. I'd totally forgotten about it until now.

m2o please don't go too far away...we miss you when you're not around .

I'm due to ovulate soon I think. DH wants to do lots of bonking this week. Hmmm. Not sure I have the energy. He just wants to get me pregnant to stop me moping and going gooey over babies. DS1 yesterday asked me if I could give him some new babies (yes, plural!!!) to play with. I told him to ask daddy.

Just a quicky as am dashing of to work - just wanted to say hi! How's everyone doing?

xxx

We're fine. Doing a spot of work on my lappy. About to make some lunch. Ovulating I think. DH has promised to perform tonight! Oh so romantic and spontaneous this all is...not!

Becky Where else could you answer 'ovulating' to being asked how you are? Don't you just love MN!!

Happy shagging x

It's a good job I don't say that to people in the RL! I had a friend at college who used to suddenly bend over double and go 'oooh I just ovulated'. We thought she was bonkers but she swore she could feel it happening.

Hi ladies

becky happy shagging lol at your college friend!

mbs hope you are ok and work isn't too bad.

I have my hospital appt. tomorrow with gynae. Bit nervous now. Had my bloods taken at nurse this wk for anticoagulant tests again. She took 6 vials and then asked if I had had my bloods done for my arthritis meds recently and I said "no" so she continued to take another 3 vials! My arm felt a bit funny afterwards
Have also had 2 dental appts and ds's parents evening which went quite well.

Had a vile migraine today and spent most of morning in bed ill. What a waste of a day. It is my 2nd one this week. Think it is stress. Keep thinking I would have been due this month if hadn't mc'd in feb and that has been getting me down . Hopefully my spa weekend will help me chill out

Another quick one - good luck today Poppy... Am off this afternoon til Sunday, but will check when I get back to see how you got on. Fingers crossed for good news x

Love to everyone else!

Hi Poppy how did the appt go?

It's just so horrible when you reach the due date after an MC. I'm dreading Christmas for that reason. Bahhh humbug.

Spa weekend sounds nice .

I'm off to town in a minute with DS1. Can I persuade him that clothes shops are fun? Probably not. We'll probably spend most of our time in Woolworths and the Early Learning Centre.

How is everyone else doing? I hope you're all enjoying your weekends.

Hi becky the appt yesterday wasn't bad. Saw a lovely consultant who deals with recurrant mc's. He went over all the causes and ruled a few out as I have aready had a full term pg and a healthy ds. He still wants to do chromosone testing to be on safe side and also all the clotting tests again.

Got sent off to a nurse who was a real butcher. I had to get 10 vials of blood taken and after she had finished she asked me to hold the cotton wool against my arm. The next min I looked down and it was sodden with blood and she was like "I told you to press it hard to close the vein" like it was my fault. (had 9 done by nurse in gp's surgery and I hadn't even a mark) By this time DH had paled as he had to get one blood test for chromosomes after which he felt light headed and faint men eh!!!

Arm looks awful today all bruised and cut where she took needle out. Hope I don't see her again.

Am all packed for spa looking forward to relaxing today. DH and DS are going to make me a birthday card while I am away. It will most likely feature tornnadoes as ds is fascinated by them at the moment. Doing weather at school.

Enjoy shopping with the ds's always a delight as we sprint past the clothes shops heading for woolies/toys r us.....

hi everyone..
thought i couldnt find the thread..
poppy, hope your spa treatment went well btw the nurse is crap..telling you off like that?..
and when is your birthday?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUUU
MBM n Becky, hope you two are well ..
btw dh came back last week and hes going to US in 2 days time for a week so been a bit busy with him these past few days. he will be back after his trip though and we'll go back to london together after that.
Just needed a bit of vent here ..found out my two younger cousins(both are sisters) are pregnant(one with the 2nd, the other 1st) and another cousin's wife just given birth few days back and i was not even informed that she was pregnant! am so angry and sad at the same time..life is just so unfair ..
hmm..it feels better to write it all down..

anyways will try to come online more often now..take care all

Happy Birthday!

I'm ok. I think I've passed ovulation time now and DH and I did it every other night give or take last week so who knows? I guess I'll start symptom spotting now for the next two weeks, as usual. At least DH can have a break...

It's so hard when you have pregnant friends or relatives. I don't know what is worse: having them go on and on about how happy / wonderful etc they are / it is or them not telling you for fear of upsetting you. It's a no win situation really.

I'm feeling a bit homesick for my old friends and the town we used to live in at the moment. I'm trying to be as positive as I can for the DSs' sake but I miss my old life so much.