***Lets support eachother again- you know who you are ***

[mummy2olivia]

charliesmum, nandos, beakas, sugr, cornflower, poppy, becky and everyone else who miscarried in may/june 2008....

We have all been very brave together and supported eachother. For those of us that are ready, it may be time to support eachother again as we return to TTC. Lets hold hands, remember our loss and give a nod to the future as we endeavour to procreate and............

SHAG!!

As promised, a thread to stay in touch. Will also see you on the MC avengers thread.

AF arrived last night. Bahhhhh!!!! This week is our last week in this house and I am feeling really, really sad. Having said that we still haven't exchanged contracts yet!

Hi Everyone!

Am feeling a teeny tiny bit better (hooray ) thanks to magic of my homeopathy lady, so thought I'd take this opportunity to post...

Just scanned through the last page or so, but now can't remember what it said. Oops.

Hope you're all okay - Becky ggrrrrrrr re AF . Mind you with a move about to happen it might be best that it doesn't happen now. At least you can lug stuff around and get settled in a bit first. Probably no consolation though...

Nandos, where are you going? You have me intrigued! Hope you have a wonderful time!

Hi Poppy, glad to hear you are ttc again - happy shagging and tons of luck

With regard to thinking about our what-would-have-been-due-dates I still cry thinking about the baby we lost, and when it would've been due. Does that sound awful considering I'm pg? Can't drum up any enthusiasm for Christmas, and I normally spend almost the whole year getting exited about it. Baby would've been due on the 14th Dec... Do you think this is normal?

Hi mbs really glad your ms is improved a bit its such a vile thing. I don't think it is possible not to think about due dates. My first this yr would have been 29th Oct which is not that far off and when I feel pg again due date was 31st Dec! Never mind onwards and upwards. Wishing you all the best for this pg.
becky sorry about AF what a bummer. I'm due next Sun so we will see what happens. Don't feel like it will happen this month somehow.

Hi mbm that is totally normal. I had an MC between DS1 and DS2 and I still cried buckets on the due date of the baby I lost (I was four months preggers at the time with mylovely DS2).

Glad you're feeling a bit better mbm.

Hi guys,

Sorry I havent been here for a while but have had a few shite weeks- in fact a shite year.

Saw my GP last week about the pelvic pain I have been getting and he thinks I have endometriosis. So have had to go on the pill.

Cant really say much more- am very disappointed and swing wildly between deep sadness and manic relief at knowing what is wrong.

He thinks the MC has either flared it up or caused it dont know but its shit either way. I dont know to what extent I have it but am very likly going to be having a laproscopy before the end of the year.

I will pop in and see you are all ok.

Hey ladies..
how is everyone doing?

Becky, sorry to hear that witch came!

MBM, am going to singapore, its a work + vacation thingy and will be back in late october. Glad you are feeling better.

M2olivia, do not lose hope cos' if you do, i would to my friend recently got married last yr and now shes had a baby boy in july and i have to face her with a smiley face! and here i am married for nearly 5yrs and still no baby. i feel like killing myself thinking abt it..
are we (i actually mean me) really losers for not able to conceive easily?
sorry i just need to let it out before i explode..
btw will let you guys know re my appt tmr..take care

hey poppy, just saw your post..sorry
how r u hunny? long time, glad you r back.
my AF is also due around next week or so..same feeling its not gonna be it this time..
anywayz good luck with your blood test n hope you get good news soon.

Oh guys, we are a sorry bunch.

M2O I'm so sorry to hear about your endometriosis. How long will you have to stay on the pill?

Nandos please don't lose hope. We need to have hope.

My AF has just finished. DH tells me his back hurts so I'm worried he'll be less inclined for bedroom gymnastics this month. And we're moving house right when I should be ovulating: 'Hang on darling, leave those boxes for a while, let's get down to it now while we can'.

I shouldn't post while listening to Cold Play. Makes me feel really sad!

M2O really sorry to hear about your endo. That just seems so unfair after the horrible time you have had.
Will taking the pill improve things so at some point you can ttc again?

nandos hope your trip is fun even though some of it is work. Sometimes a break from all this madness is necessary. I am sick and tired of people saying to me "well?" and sort of nodding down at my stomach! GRRRRR it feels like everyone is hanging on the edge of there seat in anticipation and I never really have anything good to tell them.

becky hope your move goes smoothly. Know what you mean about the timing thing and the willingness of dh's! Last month was the first month we were able to try again after the blood screening etc. and on the most important night (well according to the opk sticks) my dh was too exhausted after a hard physical day at work and a very long drive. I was raging mad and needless to say AF is enroute as boobs aching and feel totally pmt! Have landed the blame squarely at his feet this month!!!!!

Got results back from blood screening test today and clotting levels appear close to normal now but the gp couldn't understand one of the results which came back abnormal so he is writing to the gynae dr to have it clarified! He basically told me it all seems ok which now leaves me wondering then if the 2 mc's were just bad luck. Feel very frustrated. It's like one step forward and two back.

hey girls
thx for listening and replying to my rantings..
i was so mad at the gynae appt today cos' they did nothing and my next appt is next yr..thats right next yr in march
i couldnt even go to sleep now..all i did was having a continuous iron-athon n did some packing
might go prvt if theres no earlier date than this..
well..goodnite all..
sleep well

xx

hi nandos really sorry that you didn't get anywhere with gynae. Next march is a long way off and I can totally understand why you might want to think about going private. Hope you managed some sleep eventually and feel a little better today.

hey poppy..
sorry i was busy writing all my misfortunes earlier that i didnt take into consideration abt your happenings
did the gp give you some sort of medications for the clotting and when's your next appt?
do u have any kids poppy? sorry i can't remember whether you have any kids

its good to have found MNet otherwise i wouldnt know who to share my experiences/nightmares with ..

hi nandos finding msnet has been a complete eyeopener and has been great for info/support etc.
I have a ds who is 6 and have been trying for sibling for the past 4 yrs. Was considering IVF in Jan then found out I was pg then had mc. Fell pg again but mc'd in may. I have psoriatic arthritis which is an inflammatory immune disease and have loads of joint probs. Am between devil and deep blue sea in regards to meds as rheumy is desperate for me to be on much stronger drugs but can't take them whilst ttc. My condition can cause clotting probs apparantly and also make ttc more difficult
Hoping for a letter from gynae to explain my results more clearly but they seem to be improved. Anticardiolipin antibodies down from 19 in april to 10.2. Normal range is between 0-10.
Have further appt with gynae dept in Edinburgh in Oct so just need to wait now!

We've just exchanged contracts! Hooray. Moving house on Tuesday.

Poppy glad you've got an appt sooner! I hope it goes well.

Hi everyone!
Sorry havent post lately cos' few friends came to our place on Friday night and stayed with us.
So here I am writing(typing)to say goodbye and i hope to see some BFPs here by the time i come back
Take care all and have a nice day

Muahsss

Byeee Nandos! Have a good time .

I heard some very sad news on Friday. A close friend of mine who is about the same age as me who was pregnant with her second after trying for 10 months had a missed miscarriage. I was so gutted for her. She got pregnant around the time I had my MC and she was so worried I'd be upset but I wasn't at all and now I feel terrible for her as she is going through now what we all went through a couple of months ago. It also brought back all the memories of my MC too as her circumstances were so similar (a little bit of bleeding followed by scan showing that baby had died a few weeks previously). It made me realise just how precious life is and how so many people go through what we went through. Nature is so cruel sometimes.

We're in the middle of mad packing and I can't stop crying about leaving this house and lovely Charlbury where we live. I'm due to ovulate in a few days time too! Poor DH!

Bye nandos have a great trip!

So sorry to hear about your friends bad news becky it is so true that nature can be cruel. My friend had a mc at exactly the same time that I did and although it was devastating for us both it was also reassuring to have someone to talk to and cry with who truly understood how each other were feeling.
Good luck with the move which can also be a big emotional upheaval. When we left our last house 2 yrs ago due to horrid neighbours through the wall I was gutted and we were only moving up to the next estate. It will be interesting to see how you manage to fit in ttc around the unpacking!!

It's my last night here...I'm soooo sad. I can feel the tears welling up as I write this! I've been packing and scrubbing all day, I am sooo tired. There's no way I'd be up for a bit of jiggy jig right now.

Hi guys,

Tried to post yesterday but the computer was playing up. We had our 12 week scan yesterday, and found out that our baby stopped growing a couple of weeks ago. Can't believe that it's happened again. Am still feeling awful too, and even threw up before leaving the house for the doctors.

The gynae is sending dh and I for for a mammoth blood test on Monday to see if she can find out why this has happened. She was really shocked.

Feel like giving up on this whole thing to be quite honest. Don't think I can go through this again.

Becky, hope you're okay - how did your move go?

Hi MBM am so so sorry that this has happened again to you, it is so unfair. It must be such a shock especially when you are still having such strong symptoms.
My heart goes out to you both and I sincerely hope that you get some answers from your gynae appt although it will be cold comfort at the moment.

My thoughts will be with you on monday and I hope you manage to get some rest over the weekend.

Just take some time with your dh and ds as for me they were the biggest source of comfort I had and my strongest motivation for picking myself up again.

Look after yourselves and all the best for mon.

Oh MBM I am so, so sorry to read your sad news. I really wish I could give you a big hug right now. You poor, poor thing. My thoughts are with you and your DH and DS today.

The move went well. I'll tell more about all that later.

Thanks Poppy and Becky. I wish I could have a hug...

Had the blood test this morning, was asked LOADS of questions by nosey nurse who did it which was a bit difficult. Am doing okay though I think, considering what's happened. Think this may be the calm before the storm as I've just gone completely numb. Have got to have a D&C on Thursday morning, and I reckon that's going to be very tough. It was the emotions after that last time that I found so very difficult to cope with.

DH, DS, dogs and I are off to France for a week on Sat - we thought it would be a good idea to just get away and spend some time just as a family. At least I've got that to look forward to.

Hope you're both okay. This baby thing is so tough isn't it

Hi MBS glad to hear you are going away on Sat as it will give you time away from having to put on a brave face to those who know you in real life. That was the bit I found so hard to deal with and felt as though for a few weeks I was just going through the motions of my life while my heart was breaking. After 1st mc people were v supportive and said don't worry it will be ok the next time and then it wasn't and most of those people vanished as after 2mcs they didn't know what to say to me and I suppose all you really want is a hug.

I will be thinking about you on thur as it really is another ordeal to face when you are already in shock. Hopefully the blood tests will give some answers. You just take care and big virtual hugs from me.

MBM

im so sorry to hear abt the mc..
i really hope you will be ok after the d&c
poor thing
its really sad to go through mc again..no one should go through that

becky n poppy hope you guys are fine..

i keep forgetting to log on to MN everytime i have the chance to get onto the internet so dont mind me
missed my dh soo much and my mind is all over the place as one of my uncle passed away recently and another cousin who had cancer is not doing well..aah and i got to go to work later today..
must be still early morning there i suppose..
well take care everyone and MBM, do take care of yourself..i will be thinking of you ..

Hello everyone,

Just thought I'd write quickly as am off to France tomorrow for a week, and will have no internet access. No tv either, but that's another matter.

Anyway, I had the ERPC yesterday, which went okay. I stayed awake longer this time though, so was awake when the doctor did the scan. My heart started pounding thinking she was going to find out she was wrong, but no, unfortunately she found that the sac had got even smaller, the baby hadn't grown and there was no heartbeat. She also said that she thinks the baby only died last week, although it was measuring smaller. My HCG levels were still classed as very high on Monday. She said the baby obviously wasn't developing properly... Feel really weird about finding that out. I'd presumed that the baby was perfect and it was something else that had gone wrong.

Have got to go back in October to see if any other results have come back. She said we can start trying again after that, but I don't think we will be ready to.

Nandos, sorry you're missing your dh, must be v difficult being away from him for so long. Absence certainly does make the heart grow fonder doesn't it. I hope you're okay, and I'm sorry to hear about your uncle and cousin. It can't be easy... When do you come back to the UK?

Love to all of you, and will write again when we get back xxx