The wagoners have lost their way, NEW THREAD HERE - for TTC'ers and waiting to TTC'ers alike

[NatalieJaneIsPregnantAgain]

Pop, that sounds like a mare, and I don't suppose the Dr. being sacked exactly made up for it! If you stick your heels in, I'm sure they'd let you have an elec CS.

Kay, can't even remember what was in it! Do remember thinking it was better than DS1's bounty pack though....

Just had an Amazon order delivered (I got a baby names book how sad am I, I have 4 others upstairs!!) anyway I ordered DS2 one of those blow up chair things (Post Man Pat of course...) thought he might like to sit on that instead of climbing onto the sofa (and making my heart skip a beat everytime he moved) so I blew it up, he climbed on it, sat there for a little while, then used it to climb onto the sofa.... And I caught him at the top of DS1's slide earlier, it's only 5ft high.....

Oh Pop, that does sound horrendous. I know what you have been through is much worse than me, but I had a similiar experience that i'd like to share with you. DD1 was back to back and I had a very long labour, then they used the ventouse but put it on the front instead of the back so it came off while he was pulling leaving her with a large scar on her forehead.

I was very worried about how DD2 would be born but we kept a close eye on her position all through the pregnancy and as she wasn't back to back we saw no reason why it shouldn't be a straightforward birth. In the end I had a 3 hour labour and she was born in my living room

I just want you to know that although you had a bad experience the first time, that is no guarantee that the 2nd time will be the same. There's a lot of good stuff on OFP (Optimum Foetal Positioning) which really helped me and I felt much more in control 2nd time. Lulumama was very helpful with OFP hints too.

Sorry to have rambled on, I just don't want you to think that a CS is your only option.

You can get trainee doulas that do it cheaper. Or free if you are very lucky. I might be having Squonk as my doula if all goes well and I go into labour on a weekend.

Go speak to Lulumama, Pop as she is a doula and will give you loads of great advice. Also she is really good at helping if you want to talk through your birth.

I'm OK really, just having a bit of a rant today. Legacy of another broken nights sleep I guess. Its useful to have somewhere to rant to. It explodes out [ooerr] every now and then but generally I'm fine, really I am.

I'm in the office all the rest of this week so my mind will be deliberately off topic as I've got so much work to do. T'would probably help if I was doing some now...........

Pop, Doula's range a bit, but a fully trained Doula will set you back about £500, as much as she will give you support, she can't stop the baby being back to back, might be worth it though if your DH isn't going to be there (can't blame him, not sure I could watch DH labouring.... now that is a weird thought!!!)

Pop that is horrendous - poor you and poor dd. Glad that you persevered with complaint/enquiry and that the person responsible was sacked - appalling.

My dd wasn't back to back, but think I've got a funny pelvis. I had undiagnosed SPD (kept telling the mw I couldn't move but she wouldn't listen - said it was just 'aches and pains of pg'!). I was in active labour for 32 hours, and ended up with ventouse. Dd got stuck (shoulder dystocia) and I had a haemhorrage, but thankfully all ok in the end (although I couldn't walk for weeks because they'd put my legs in stirrups). Because of this (which doesn't sound nearly as traumatic as your experience - not surprises your dh was traumatised) if I were to become pg again I would definitely consider a doula. I want to feel that there is someone who totally understands my previous birth experience, and can support both me and my dh. I've made enquiries already, and trainee doulas in my area aren't too expensive. The way I see it is anything that would help the birth to go smoothly is money well spent. We haven't got any money - but will find a way to make sure we can have a doula, even if we have to carboot the contents of the loft and ebay all our stuff!! Still haven't cleaned the bathroom - must go and do that now!

Sorry x posts 1000 times, was saving DS2 from the cat.... Or saving the cat from DS2, you decide!!

Ooer Nat, could you imagine it? I couldn't watch DH in labour urgh!!!

Moosma - it sounds very similar!!! Sorry to hear that you had a terrible time.

It's lovely to hear that your second delivery went so well. 3 hours!!! and at home!!!! Where you not scared about a home delivery after what happened?

I will have a long hard think about asking for a c-secion and will think about trying naturally again.

Ladies - you are all so helpful. What would I do without you?

I have to go and do some work now but I will try and get back on tomorrow.

Have a lovely evening all.
x

Ooh, took agest to post that, sorry. Popcorn, sorry to hear about your experience - completely understand why you would want a CS instead.

The stitches were a real buggeration for me but felt good enough to be reasonably mobile by 5 weeks and itching to escape in the car by 6!

In terms of the experience itself, even though mine was an emergency c-section, what I remember of it was very chilled and laid back. I think I'd have been much better off if I'd managed without the pethidine though. I was groggy from the drugs for about three days and missed all the tiny baby, newness with DS.

I think I'm reconciling things about DS birth and know enough to think that I could manage another CS, though it would be nice to have a VBAC - I'm not mad, just very tight, down there so a VBAC would make things a little more comfortable!

Have a good night Pop

I think DH would be the sort of woman to go off into the woods alone and give birth, but my god I'd be following behind so I get to see him at the same stage as he get's to see me! LOL

Cal, don't bank on it making things loser down there.....

LOL NJ - I think that's what my DH would choose - but not before he'd built himself a camp, killed enough rabbits to feed himself for a month after and got everything he could possibly need lined up ready...

He likes to be prepared, you know, always carries a penknife, torch, two mobile phones (don't ask, its embarassing!) and at the weekends if he digs deep in his pockets, he'll probably find a fire lighter too.

He loves all that stuff - proper big boy scout!

Really? I thought that was a forefone conclusion....I mean, I'm not asking for a temple or even a church or anything, maybe just a chapel would be nice rather than a cubby hole?

My friend had her mum with her but I don't think I'd like having my mum there. She would probably annoy the hell out of me. Though I could have MIL there, I could swear at her loads and get away with it.

I'd love a home birth, which the MW said was possible as DS's birth was normal and straight forward but I don't know if I could inflict that on my neighbours.

foregone

LMAO He sound's similar to my DH, except DH doesn't carry this stuff, he just finds it (or something that would the same job) at exactly the right time.

He does have 2 mobiles, though he has good reason!

Kay, I think I would benefit from my Mum being there in many ways, coz she's strong and she wouldn't let me be pushed about....

But by the same token, she faffs alot about things that seem trivial to me and I wouldn't want to get cross with her at a time which is supposed to be special for both of us. Have considered a doula too, but seems a bit extravagant and I think ultimately, I'd get annoyed with anyone that wasn't DH anyway.

Hmmmm. At least i've got plenty of time to think about it!!!

Cal, my DH is the same, I feel like he is planning on something happening so that we cant get home.
He also always takes the electric key with him 'just incase' Incase what??? the flat wont ring us if the electric runs down! I put £20 on it yesterday and he still took the key when we went shopping this morning!!

Well, DS1 didn't make any difference, DS2 did make the slightest little bit of difference, not to temple or church proportions, just made it easier to stretch, but see the thing is, if you keep your pelvic floor exercises up (which you have to else you'll be dribbling) then I'm afraid your cubby hole stays a cubby hole.... it does ease, but not grow....

Can't wait to tell DH he is giving birth in the woods, while my fanjo looks like a temple church something... LOL

DH thinks he has a good reason, they're on different networks and one might not have a signal.....

I think men should have to give birth. Its so unfair. I don't mind carrying the baby. Its the labour I don't like.

Pop, I was worried at the beginning of the pg but my midwife was lovely and sensible! We decided that I would only try a home birth if she (DD2, not the MW!) was still in a good position and that at the slightest hint of her being back to back I would whizz in to hospital. Perhaps you could have a similar clause in place? You'll try for a VB but if it's back to back then can you have a CS pretty please?

Oh oops I wasn't trying to imply that people that had given birth vaginally were cavernous!!! LOL!!! Its just that sex is often quite painful for me, so if it was to ease, that might be more comfortable.

LMAO Cal, I love your DH LOL

My perfect labour/birth, would be me, DH, chocolate, and erm... that's it. No MW telling me to stop yelling, no body poking around, just DH watching the news or something ignoring me!