TWW at 40 yrs old

[poppymango]

A few days into my two week wait now, period due around 2nd of March.

Trying not to get too excited as I'll soon be 40 and I know my chances are lower - nevertheless, I found myself downloading a pregnancy tracking app this morning and looking at all the visuals of what the baby would look like at various stages 🙃

Anyone else out there want to wait with me? Crossing fingers and toes for my November baby!!

Got suspected shingles. Last time I had it I was just pregnant. Had a negative test this morning but wondering

Thanks for everyone’s kind advice. I had blood tests and scan at GP and she said everything was fine and I was ovulating. At least that month. But been speaking to my mum and she said she experienced early menopause mid 40s and her periods just stopped. So I think that might be same for me?

Hey all, wanted to join this thread, im 38, 39 in December. TTC for the first time. Came off BC 5 months ago after being on it for a very long time. Have been trying for 4 cycles so far. This cycle we are not as just had surgery yesterday to remove cervical polyp and small fibroid. So im filling my time reading and wishing everyone in the forum luck. Hopefully I will be back to trying next month

My AHM is 15pmol so I’m quite happy about that it’s average for early 30s and better for 40
i guess it’s the quality rather than quantity that’s taking us so long

Hello
im back again, TTC, I’m 42, 3 teenagers and just had my 2nd loss last month. I started my loss on may 3rd and about 2 weeks later I could feel I was ovulating so we went for it, and now my tests dare I say look positive. I’m so scared I was was just referred to the miscarriage clinic so we don’t know why I’ve had 2 losses yet. Beyond scared it happens again. How likely would a GP prescribe progesterone to support this pregnancy do you think?

Congrats @Mrs777
So sorry for your losses, I think with our age mc chances are a lot higher unfortunately.
id call the gp to ask anyway there no harm in calling.
hope this one sticks for you!

Hello, gentle congratulations but am so sorry for your losses. I am also 42 with 2 past losses but not yet TTC. I am under the care (private) of a recurrent miscarriage clinic and can give you the advice they gave me. This was before any tests, so I'd say it's safe for anyone. 2000 iu vitamin D3 and 75mg of aspirin daily. It may also be worth taking omega 3 although I'm not sure if this is for conception or early pregnancy. The NHS guidelines will only prescribe progesterone if you have previously had bleeding in pregnancy, but if you have I would push for it. I have everything crossed for you.

@Mrs777 does in harm in asking but speaking from my own personal experience and reading others on here, They wouldn't prescribe progesterone, despite knowing how stressful it was going through a loss. GP would only refer after 3 loses for some testing and then that would be upto consultant to prescribe or not. Sometimes epu will prescribe if your having bleeding ect and they think your at risk of threatened miscarriage due to low progesterone. Some epu clinics but not all.
You may be able to get it if you go private tho. I know I suffer from low progesterone as I've had multiple tests put me in the grey area but gp wouldn't prescribe. I did go through fertility treatment for my last pregnancy and progesterone is automatically prescribed but I truly believe it was only successful as I was on the progesterone. Getting it is bloody tricky

Where is everyone in their cycles? I'm currently 7dpo. This is our last cycle trying naturally. If we don't conceive this month then we're starting our prep meds for ivf on my next bleed, which I'm dreading .

I’m day 9 here @VioIetMoon so about to ovulate in next 3-4 days I think.

Thanks so much for all your advice, I really appreciate it, I shall buy all that. Sorry you’re going through a tough time also. I hope you are blessed with yours soon too xx

CD7 currently, and I believe I ovulate around day 20 😩😩😩

I’m CD 9 here and should ovulate around day 14 which will be when we are on holiday as we go on Tuesday

Hi all. Can I please ask some more advice sorry. My husband is really struggling with the process also and at the point where he thinks we should just let it go. He sees the stress it brings and is starting to say he feels too old to
be a dad again. I want to work with him through this but obviously both need to be on the same page. Any advice please is welcome xx

That’s really tough @EmberR remind me, how old are you both. And how old are current dc? Would he (and you) be willing to keep trying without ovulation tests etc for maybe 6 more cycles?

My period arrived this morning, feeling a bit sad as I’d convinced myself that the fact I had shingles again like last time was a sign. Taking a positive that my cycle seems more on track

@TheFutureIs im sorry to hear your period arrived today. Mine did too…. Always a rough day. Sending love

we have a 5 year old and my husband is 43 I am 42. I had all the blood tests and scans at GP and she said all looked normal. We have been actively trying 8-9 cycles

I have an 8 year old. I’m 42 and partner is 45. I guess in terms of age it depends on how much energy you have, while also remembering that the sleepless night phase is relatively short lived in the grand scheme of things. We haven’t gone down testing road yet and have been trying for 4 cycles so far

@TheFutureIs we are in very similar situation. It’s so nice to connect with others who are in the same boat.

My husband seems to think if it happens it happens as a lovely surprise but not to get too medical about it. It’s a hard balance

I’d suggest that everything could be okay to keep trying, because you have control over part of what he’s said. If you can talk to us and vent to us more about what’s going on rather than maybe voice it directly to him, and try and keep things at home light around sex time and testing time etc, the impact on him will change and there’ll be space for more positivity to come out.
I hope that makes sense. I’m autistic and things sound a lot better in my head 😅

I'm realising that @EmberR and @EmPeEf are 2 different people! 😵

I think what @EmPeEf said. Also it would be good to understand what he finds difficult exactly. If it's the unspontaneous sex, the ups and downs of hope, relentless questioning. Or actually having a baby to take care?

@Mouche85 😄 sorry to be confusing lol. My username is the initials of my middle names 👍🏻

Thank you for all you lovely ladies and your kind advice!! It means a lot to me. Yes I think @EmPeEf and I have similar user names!

totally right I am going to keep it light on the conversation at home about it. I think his biggest issues are

1. I want him to cut down on hot baths and alcohol to give us best chance but he thinks these are such small impact (I mean he has a 30 min bath once a week and drinks moderately so in normal world this is so nothing I would ever raise)
2. He won’t consider trying IVF
3. He sees how upset I am every month it doesn’t work and he wants me to be happy

All fair points but I still want to try! Xx

Nooo, get him to read this! Hot baths is the one thing my partner and I are focusing on changing (he takes them for psoriasis and arthritis). Get him to read this link. Exposing sperm to heat even just once every three weeks was enough for contraception! The heat can fracture the DNA and destroys the morphology of them.

https://www.mcgill.ca/oss/article/health/facts-and-myths-male-fertility-tight-underwear-hot-tubs-marijuana-and-more

I was so shocked when I read it, but considering how much and how quickly the test subjects’ sperm improved in such a short term, heat definitely has an impact.

@EmPeEf the hot baths thing seems so crazy! He has always enjoyed a hot bath and would argue with me that we got pregnant last time and he used baths then…
we were on holiday last week and the hotel had a sauna and he went in for 10 minutes - then I was grumpy!!!

@EmberRI’m sorry he’s being like that. It’s understandable he doesn’t like seeing you upset but giving up a hot bath is not really much of a sacrifice is it. As women we generally do every thing possible that might help so think giving up a hot bath isn’t asking much of him