TTC #1 over 35

[Clara202]

As the title suggests, if you’re over 35 and TTC your first, I’d love to hear from you! Would be nice to hear from a few of us in the same boat 🙂

That’s good news though isn’t it? How many dpo are you now? Maybe a clear blue digital with the time frame on it would help? You only tested early as your LH remained high, were you using opks after your ovulation for any particular reason? I’m 5 dpo today I think, I feel exactly as I normally do, surprise surprise!

Good luck, I certainly didn’t feel any different so I very much hope you get good news. I kept testing because I wanted more information around what was happening with ovulation, and I wanted reassurance that I truly did “peak” and that I’d go roughly back to 0. I only started using ovulation tests quite a while into my ttc journey. I wasn’t on Mumsnet till ivf and didn’t have all the advice on here. I took another opk the other day just to see and it was quite strong. I’ve read Hcg and lh are similar. Annoyingly my CB sticks are roughly the same (though strong) as two days ago, and the digital is still (as of 4am) 1-2 weeks which it was at last wed evening. If the doctor hadn’t flagged he was worried I wouldn’t be obsessing…

How is everyone doing?
@Nosejug I’ve been thinking of you, hope everything is going well.

11dpo and still bfn. Usually I wouldn’t even keep testing at this point, I’m cycle day 24 and usually I’d have sore boobs from day 19 letting me know AF is on her way. Every month my body does something different but sore boobs was the only consistent thing I had since I started tracking. I do have the other familiar full feeling in my sides so I suppose it’s just a matter of time now. Even the month I had an unusually long cycle of 31 days I had sore boobs from a week after ovulation. I am disappointed as I really hoped for a baby in 2025, we’re now going into 2026 with no children😔 I was also hoping to avoid the hycosy, and the possible IVF, but it’s looking likely now I’ll have to go done the road.

Bad news for me too I’m afraid @Clara202 . I’m going to have another miscarriage. I haven’t processed it yet, I’m out awaiting my mot and just burst into tears in a coffee shop 🫣

@Nosejug I’m so sorry to hear that, that’s so tough. I hope you have all the support you need at this time 😔

Sorry @Nosejug and @Clara202 sending virtual support 💐.

Bad news for me too. Feeling really bitter and just had the biggest cry as I mowed the grass.

Oh @Nosejug I’m so sorry darling. Sending you so many hugs it’s devastating.

I feel very burdened with TTC at the moment. My husband and I have always been rock solid but it’s really impacting us as a couple. Since my MMC I really feel the clock ticking so loudly and I’ve never felt that way before. I am terrified of trying and it not happening and I’m terrified every month we don’t try it is another month.

All I can think about is that I’m 37.5 and need to have two kids in basically 2-3 years. It terrifies me now. Every month is a lost chance and we haven’t even tried this year (MMC in Feb, moved house in March, got a puppy that’s in the bedroom, husband has been away “that week” for two months). I am so angry and resentful to hubby for having a life and being away for two months in a row.

I know negativity isn’t going to make it happen but even trying is so much pressure. Going to book my Drs appt next week, beginning to think IVF is somehow easier to arrange when you have such demanding careers. I do have an IVF allowance on my work policy, but I know you can only have NHS IVF until you’re 39 so trying to keep it in the bank.

The burden of being older is a lot, especially when you still feel too young 😭

Feel better writing that 😂

Hugs @Toppstileslover no doubt someone will be along with wiser words than I, but it's hard xxx

@Toppstileslover I feel every word of what you’ve said, except I’m 38.5 (and more!) and instead of planning for 2-3 kids I’m thinking oh God I might not even have 1! We have not missed a single month of TTC since September, so 8 months now and nothing. I always said to my husband I wouldn’t panic until we were 8 months trying, so yes, I am now quite panicked!

Virtual hugs for you too @Clara202 it's tough

I know @Clara202 and I always think of you! I was even talking about it to someone random at Pilates last night (omg cringe) but it is just so ever present. And the response is always “I was the youngest at NCT and everyone was 40”. I don’t live in London anymore so that’s hopeful

Maybe they are also too busy to even find the time to TTC!!!! Poor husband leaves at 6 and gets home at 9 most days without me texting him telling him IM OVULATING. Plus I am totally crap and find all the ovulation sticks a lot.

going to be super organised this month and give it a good ol’ go

let’s all try and enjoy Easter 🐣 xxxx

I've not caught up on the whole thread - only about half way through.

We're still trying, I think I'm becoming a little obsessive about the whole thing. I'm taking so many supplements (I think they're doing something), I've started with OPKs and doing my temp (which apparently fluctuates more than normal), I'm pondering my cervical mucous each time I go to the loo. I'm even considering examining my own cervix. Ovulation hasn't yet been detected but I think i have ovulated - I ordered a blood test online so hopefully that will confirm. I had an episode of spotting on Friday during/after sex (he had some on him (initially thought he had bleeding gums) but when I went to the loo and wiped there was some pink on the paper). Notuing at all since. I'm trying not to get my hopes up and think it was implantation bleeding. But from when I think I ovulated, it would have been 8 days post ovulation.

thought i'd update a little, turns out it was/is ectopic, I was very close to emergency surgery (I was in a bed in a queue in the pre op room!) but a bigger emergency got put in front of me, I was delayed a day, and then my hcg started to fall on its own, so I'm getting tests every two days to ensure its still falling, if it does then I can avoid surgery, if it doesn't then I'll have a tube removed. I actually feel ok now, way less grief in this miscarriage as it's been so medicalised. The first one belonged to my body way more. hopefully i'll be back on here sooner than later ttc again. wishing luck to anyone getting close to ovulation/in the tww. x

@Nosejug hopefully it continues to go down and you can avoid the surgery, and I’m glad that you’re feeling well all things considered.

AF is imminent here, I’d imagine Day 1 will be tomorrow as am spotting today. I’m on CD32 now so it’s been a long wait. Hycosy booked for next month.

Thinking of you @Nosejug

Oh thinking of you @Nosejug bless you. You must feel wretched xx

I am due on in the next few days but feeling optimistic about TTC this month. Have the week off with hubby which is nice and puppy is moving out of the bedroom this week which let’s be honest has been the main reason we’ve not TTC (aside from major relocation)

I’ve also diarised my ovulation week in his work calendar for the next three months. He did go to Cambridge but didn’t know ovulation wasn’t the same day every month omg. Think we will just DTD every couple of days from a few days after AF then try and limber up for every day the week of ovulation. Worked last time for the MMC so I’ll pray to the gods of the Ovary ✨💖

Hi ladies can I join? Really struggling with this journey, trying to tell myself to be kind to myself but that’s hard! Just about to start cycle 5 TTC #1. Had a random chemical pregnancy last August before we started trying, since Jan we have DTD in ovulation week loads, tracking with OPKs, mucus, BBT, regular cycles but nothing as of yet. Why is this so painstakingly hard?! 36 2 weeks ago with low AMH so I know time is ticking. Would be good to hang out here for support whilst we all wait for our bfps!

@Thisisouryear2025 welcome to the fold! How low is your AMH? From what I’ve gathered it really doesn’t have a huge impact on your fertility so I wouldn’t worry. At 36 you’re also on the younger side of this particular group so you have that going for you also. Have you had any fertility tests? If not I’d recommend booking yourself and partner in, never too early to look into things!

@Clara202 Hey! Thank you! Well it was 7.5 two years ago so it’s likely half that now maybe. I had an AFC of 18-20 two years ago so that will be less too. It’s hard to see myself as young now at 36 & I have most definitely told myself I’m going to struggle. I had a full fertility MOT done two years ago, all came back great except the AMH & FSH at 10.9. OH hasn’t had anything yet but we had a chemical back in August. I have booked us a GP appointment on the 6th May so I can book to get my bloods redone & him referred for a S.A. like you say id rather know now if we have an issue x

@Nosejug hope you’re doing alright.

@Thisisouryear2025 can you go and get those tests done privately rather than wait a GP referral? Unsure how things work in different countries

@Clara202 yeah we will i think if the GP referral takes a while. Depending on what they say and timescales, il just pay privately. How are you?

@Thisisouryear2025 Im ok, AF is here so I’m just gearing up for that to end and get back to trying again. I’m definitely a lot less positive this cycle, we’ll keep trying but I’ve lost the positivity a bit.

How is everyone doing?

Hi all - can I join! First cycle this month, I’m on CD 15 probably ovulating soonish as OPKs are getting darker and had EWCM this morning