TTC #1 over 35

[Clara202]

As the title suggests, if you’re over 35 and TTC your first, I’d love to hear from you! Would be nice to hear from a few of us in the same boat 🙂

Not sure about the luteal phase @Nosejug but I’m sorry AF arrived for you. Hope you get some answers soon.

@Screenburnoch I didn’t have high hopes this time, and ivf will be upon me again soon so I don’t feel too rubbish this cycle. Thanks for your kind words though :) I hope your line is coming along nicely!

Thanks @Nosejug. I’m not optimistic as I started having PMS symptoms yesterday and the line got darker yesterday but is a bit lighter today. So don’t think it’s stuck. :(

Ok, it could be possible that the fluctuation isn’t bad news, and pms symptoms are concurrent with pregnancy, but either way, it’s like Clara said, it’s a great hurdle to have crossed no matter what. Especially so soon after starting trying. I’ll be thinking of you and wishing for the best.

Hello, just wanted to come and check in on you all and say I’m thinking of you. This thread is so lovely, and I’m so, so hopeful for you all.

i wanted to say, @Nosejug, my luteal phase got super short at one point (though it’s never been longer than 12 days). When I conceived my son (who we lost at 19 weeks in Sept last year), I wasn’t even having proper periods. I’d had a D&C eight weeks previously and I was having intermittent bleeds every 18 days or so, so assumed I wasn’t even ovulating. Imagine my surprise when I felt weird and had a positive test just 18 days after the last bleed. Having worked it out, I must have ovulated on CD9 (and I was still bleeding on CD8!), and had the positive at 9DPO. When I called up the EPU to tell them, she told me it was impossible and I must have my dates wrong. A scan two weeks later proved my dates were bang on. She couldn’t believe it. So that was a 9 day luteal phase!

@KittyFantastica I was thinking of you recently, it’s lovely to hear from you. I hope all is going well.

@KittyFantasticathanks so much for sharing that, it’s good to know it won’t necessarily mean there’s an issue with mine being short :) I hope everything’s going as smoothly as possible for you and that you’re able to enjoy this time.

@KittyFantastica i’ve also been wondering how are! I’ve not seen you about recently and was hoping you’re ok and everything is going smoothly for you!

Thank you @Clara202 @Nosejug @MrsH26I think of all all often and do check in now and again, but I know it can be triggering to hear from pregnant people, so I don’t like to jump in a lot as I don’t want to hurt anyone.

I’m doing okay, thus far, thank you. I’ve been very quiet on here since my positive as I’m just so scared. Making it through the first trimester has been a big step (I’m 14 weeks today), but the second trimester is our even bigger danger zone now, so the fear and stress is very difficult. There have been many panics and upsets already. We are under a specialist and having some investigations, hopefully) to see if we can prevent what happened last time from happening again. We just don’t know what will happen, and it’s horrifying.

But baby (fingers crossed) seems to be doing well, so that’s what we hold onto.

@KittyFantastica thats great news, so far! Everything crossed for you!
Have they told you about getting the cervical suture to help prevent pre-term birth?

I’m 13wks tomorrow. Dating scan done and NT very normal. Screening was 5 days ago now, I’m hoping I don’t hear anything today or Monday and then I should be low risk on screening!

@KittyFantastica Please don’t feel like you have to stay away. I for one like to hear of the positives in this group in particular as it gives me hope that maybe I’ll get there too one day. In groups where people are 25 years old or in groups where they’re TTC their 2nd or 3rd baby, I must admit I find that a little difficult, I find myself just coming back here as I can identify more. I know it must be terrifying for you considering all you’ve been through but try to just take it day by day, week by week.

I agree with Clara! It gives me hope to hear of other women in a similar position moving forwards. Glad things are going well so far @KittyFantastica and it’s good that you’re under specialist care. I so hope there’s a point soon where you’ll get to enjoy being pregnant. I can only imagine how scary this stage must be for you.

Happy 13 weeks @MrsH26I didn’t realise we are within just a week of each other! It took 10 days for our screening letter to arrive, but they said we’d have a phone call 3-5 days after if there was any concern, so you should be fine now.

And thank you @Clara202 @Nosejug I felt the same. Even in due date groups, I often feel a bit odd as the older person still with no living children when most of the others my age are on kid 2/3/4.

it certainly is terrifying, and I don’t think there will be a moment I relax at all, but one day at a time is what we’re doing.

If I can ever do anything to help anyone, please do reach out. We’ve been so lucky with falling pregnant, but desperately unlucky in keeping them, so it’s a terrible balance really. But I remember the anxiety of the 2 week wait so well - I never made it last 10 days!

@KittyFantastica
my screening coordinator called me yesterday afternoon, I work within the department, so she let me know as soon as they came in.
1 in less than 5000 for Edwards and Patau’s and 1:230 for Downs. Which given my age (42), I’m pleased with.
normal NT at 1.3mm and very good Papp-A at 0.96

It must be so difficult for you, have you a rainbow clinic where you are? It’s easier said then done, but try and take joy in the small moments where you can

@MrsH26 that sounds very positive 🙏🏻
@KittyFantastica its a different journey for everyone, but I’m very thankful for this group.

AF arrived for me officially day. I say officially because it turned up on Tuesday, then completely disappeared for Wed and Thurs, spotted yesterday and what I hope is a full flow today. So I’m counting it as CD1. I’m just itching for our appointment with the consultant to go through our test results, I just want to know now.

@Clara202
I’ve everything crossed you get some answers and a positive outcome

@Clara202 when do you get your results (or is the date ambiguous?) I’m looking forward to knowing about further blood testing. Getting some repeat bloods tomorrow just before starting ivf again as the nhs are taking a while releasing my records to me.

We’ve been recommended to get pgta testing on any embryos by the clinic, I’m guessing not everyone here has ivf knowledge, but if anyone has opinions on that kind of testing I’d like to hear them. It’s not genetic markers right? But just checks to see if the embryos are viable? It feels a bit strange to me as I’d want to give the embryos a chance even if their chances were very small. Sorry I know this isn’t an ivf group so no worries if no answers!

@SquadGoalzi just ovulated (according to lh surge) about two days ago. Partner poor morphology and my age are our factors, though I was 36 when I began. Docs were not worried about either for us at the start either. Partner got varicoseal (sp?) surgery to help morphology and will be doing a further semen analysis shortly so we’ll find out if that helped. We’ve had 1 spontaneous pregnancy (mmc) in about 3.5 years, but I’m older than and have diminished ovarian reserve you so you’ll have better odds with your eggs! I hope you don’t have to wait too much longer.

@Nosejug have my appointment on Friday so will know then what the results are of the ultrasound, and husband’s sperm analysis. I had bloods done by GP and everything seemed normal, in his opinion anyway. I got my AMH done a few months ago, but I had it done again so it will be interesting to see how this latest result compares.
@SquadGoalz welcome, I have never had a positive test either, I’m sorry to hear that you’ve been going through this for so long. I am expecting to ovulate on Wednesday or Thursday, so I will be a few days behind you.

Hi ladies, tentatively coming back here as we will ttc again this month after my mmc and D&C at 9 weeks in February. I’m 37 as is husband.

everything has changed: moved house, started new role and I really want it to happen and already feel apprehensive that it won’t. I am doing every positive affirmation going!

sending so much love to everyone and sending lots of luck for test results and good news for everyone xx

Sending lots of love to everyone 💕. I'm in the tww and battling on. On the waiting list for IVF, trying to lose weight for that. Thinking of you all.

Oh goodness, I can’t believe I get to write this again, but I just had a positive test..! We are literally two days away from making a 10k down payment on further treatment. I don’t even know how to feel, like I’m shocked! (And obviously trying to keep my head on straight as my only other pregnancy was a mmc).

whatever happens, it’s added hope that it is possible. I feel like I’m gonna wake up tomorrow and it’s not true. I only had my lh surge last Thursday?!

to give anyone else hope, this is after 3.5 years ttc and being 39.

I hope that message didn’t come across as insensitive, I can’t think straight. I’m just a bit in shock.

@Nosejug not insensitive at all! So you only had your surge on Thursday and you had a positive test yesterday at 6dpo or have I picked up on that correctly? Congratulations, any positives in this group is good news for everybody!

@Clara202exactly. I absolutely can’t understand how it could be positive this early. Reason I tested so early was that after my surge my lh wasn’t dropping like it did last month (and after my mc my ovulation sticks were strong positive for ages). I took two cheap tests and then remembered I had saved a digital test from ages ago and it confirmed. Evening urine as well?! I didn’t drink enough water (well not my usually guzzling) so maybe it was v concentrated, or maybe something about lh surge and when I ovulate is off. I had 2 days of light pink/brown spotting two/three days after surge too, but I just thought here we go again with all the spotting before my period. A part of me is like… maybe it’s false?! I very much hope not. I know this early it could end quickly too, but I happy to know I seem to still have a chance. Without letting myself believe it at all yet, if it does work out, the nhs app says I’d be due on my 40th birthday…!

@Nosejug you must have ovulated earlier surely? I don’t know a huge amount but I’d have thought it’d be impossible to get a positive this early, you must’ve ovulated earlier than the tests said. I’m a bit confused myself with opks. I went straight from a blank circle on Tuesday to a static Yesterday, no flashing at any point. I used a cheap opk today and based off that one I’m not ovulating yet, the line isn’t as dark as the control line. Doesn’t it have to be as dark as or darker?