Immune/NK cells pred thread #32

[VenusStarr]

Hi everyone. The last thread is filling up. Have tried to tag everyone who posted on the last few pages, but feel free to join / tag anyone I missed.

@Gizmo1983
@fleur89
@Sunflower360
@MotherOfShihTzus
@lozzmax
@HopefulH
@kea1990
@Sprinkleofbabydust
@Newbeginnings22023
@star2022
@RumandSpinach
@Ems123456789
@MamaW05

Love to all ❤️

@HopefulH lovely dark line today ❤️

Ignore that lady, she doesn't know what she's talking about. I get why you've been testing.

No I'm not going to get my bloods done because I'm also too scared and I'm too scared to keep testing also. It's nice to live in hope for a bit.

So I totally get your point around the scan, but I do think knowledge is power - so whatever the clinic can offer you in terms of explanations, it's better for them to see every stage so they can adjust your plan accordingly if they need to. You can absolutely go on holiday with a MMC - lots of people opt to wait and see what happens naturally, so you'd be no different to that. But you have to do what's best for you and your family - if you don't want a scan, don't have one, it's totally your choice and you have your boy to consider. We just had the most magical trip away with our little girl, it was so nice spending that time with her in a happy place where I was totally present. Sorry that doesn't help!

@lozzmax thank you - it's such a relief sometimes to feel totally understood and speak to someone else who gets it. That's lovely you had such a nice break with your little one. That's what I was hoping for with my little boy and now I'm so upset that I may be mid miscarriage.

Everything you've said makes sense so thank you. I won't be having my early scan with CRP as I'm not paying for treatment there at the moment, although I was wondering whether to get back in touch with them. As far as I understand things, they don't do any additional immune tests when pregnant so it would be a case of just watching and seeing what happens?

I'm thinking of doing my early scans with the consultant I was about to start ivf with, so that she has as much info as possible, if we end up doing ivf. She's monitoring my progesterone levels too. I don't think I'd want to do another natural pregnancy if this one also fails, plus it takes us so long to fall pregnant each time. I'm 37 now so I was thinking PGTA with immune protocol is our next step xx

I'm so bloated today from the progesterone I think. Are you on cyclogest too?

@HopefulH I think that sounds like a good plan. Dr. Shehata was very against PGTA testing for us but it's also my next step. Doesn't sound like there's much point in you being scanned at CRP tbh, they'd do nothing different.

I'm on progesterone but I got given an oral pill version last week at the CRP clinic which is a game changer!! Couldn't believe my luck, I hate those perssaries. I definitely find week 5 of pregnancy to be a very bloated week in general, so hopefully it's a good sign for you 🤞🏼

Morning everyone. Hope you're all OK. This shit just keeps rolling, my car has died! Turns out i only have breakdown cover a quarter of a mile from home (it's on the drive), so couldn't get to work even if I wanted to. My neighbour had a look and he said its unlikely to be revived. Plus my period is now officially late, so im anxious about that too 👍 I know it's likely because I'm so stressed. I'm not sleeping well at all. And still nothing about my appointment. The weekend was busy so I was occupied for the most part but now just totally overwhelmed and panicky 😔

@VenusStarr it never rains but it pours. Deal with one thing at a time I know the car is super rubbish but it’s just a piece of metal and that can be sorted. Period can be a million things is it worth doing a test? Fingers crossed you get an appointment today. Got everything crossed for everything xxx

Thank you @Gizmo1983 ❤️ it's definitely pouring at the moment. You're right, it's just all coming at once and just when I'd started to feel on top of things. But there's nothing I can do right now about any of it.

Still checking my nhs app. You think I'd be used to not being in control and living in limbo as have had a LOT of practice with infertility and miscarriages.
I've definitely convinced myself it's bad news, even reading the stats hasn't helped as I've never been on the good side of statistics.

This is my first day on my own as dh is at work, so it's been easier to keep myself in check but it's just spiraling at the moment 🙃

Hope you're doing ok. Thanks for replying xxx

@VenusStarr I hope you're ok. I totally know the feeling of being used to being on the bad side of statistics - you get to the point where you just assume you're the 1% rather than the 99%. Doesn't matter how many times people tell you what the most likely outcome is. What are the next steps? Have you had bloods done? x

Thank you @lozzmax I'm waiting for the hospital to call to book an appointment, think it's like a one stop shop, so should have a consultation and ultrasound, maybe mammogram and a biopsy, depending what they find. I'm not sure about bloods. My referral says I should have had a call by tomorrow and I should chase if not heard anything. I've looked the clinic up and think they only do Mondays, Tuesdays and Wednesdays for these types of assessments, so thinking my appointment won't be til next week. I think they try to tell you the same day what's going on (ie, suspect it's suspicious or it's ok). Biopsy results are longer, so it depends what they think.

How are you doing? Xx

Z@VenusStarr you can always just ring them amd ask u never know they may have had a last minute cancellation xxx

That's true. I might wait til tomorrow as that's the day I should hear @Gizmo1983
I think it must just be stress, am not pregnant, walked down to the pharmacy earlier.

@VenusStarr any news on the car? Just the last bloody thing you needed. I’m not even allowed to drive at the minute if you lived closer you could have borrowed mine lol. If you don’t ring today defo ring them tomorrow if theees one thing I’ve learned is with the NHS you have to ride their backs and just make sure they definitely have your referral xxx

I've just left the car, I was getting too stressed with it @Gizmo1983 🤦🏻‍♀️ my other neighbour has obe of those devices to see what's wrong with it, so he's going to take a look later. I've been looking for a new one... it is 13 years old, so massively overdue!

Bless you, I appreciate the thought 🚗

I'm wondering if I should chase today? I don't want to be one of those patients (although with infertility stuff, I totally am!! 🤣)

@VenusStarr just ring them and say they a said I’d hear from you today and if they say no we said tomorrow just say oh I’m so sorry with everything going on I must have got it wrong. Then you don’t seem pushy you’ve made a genuine mistake xxx

I didn't ring @Gizmo1983 I was too scared to 😪 I have impulse bought a new (to me) car though. We went to look after work and I just thought, fuck it, so I bought it. My car is a write off.
I will definitely call them tomorrow x

@VenusStarr hey sweet hopefully your appointment Comes through today and it’s really soon. Ooooh happy new car day that should be a nice distraction and you’re one day closer to getting some answers xxx

Thank you @Gizmo1983 ❤️ I had a horrendous night, anxiety is sky high. I just couldn't not settle at all. I'm definitely calling today.
Hope you are doing ok, lovely xxx

Oh @VenusStarr, sorry to read your news. Never rains but it pours! Hope you get some clarity today.

My period was due on Sunday and nothing so far - I’m usually regular as clockwork. Not expecting any positive news though - I couldn't detect ovulation this month, negative hcg tests and cramps. Was all prepared with my meds so feeling a bit deflated. Maybe posting will make it arrive!

@VenusStarr its easier for your brain to run away on a night to all those places you don’t want it to go I think. I’ve just got in from a walk in the rain got soaked and I’m freezing now but quite enjoyed it. Hope so much you find out when that appointment is and then you have a timeframe as it won’t be far away now if it’s a 2 week pathway 🤞.
@v60 it’s so annoying when this happens I’ve always ovulated/period like clockwork but we did an ivf cycle last month and I should have ovulated today but so far nothing so not sure what’s going on I’m just trying not to think about it easier said than done isn’t it lol fingers crossed it started very soon for you xxx

oh @VenusStarr I am sorry you have had a terrible night, hoping you get your appointment confirmed today.

Recieved some news on Sunday that my SIL is pregnant and she would have been about two weeks behind our recent loss - this is very similar to our first miscarriage in 2022 when hers progressed perfectly. She was extremely insensitive in that time - showing off bump with posts on social media etc 2 days after we found out about our loss, we have never really got on well. It has sent me spiralling and feeling all the ugly feelings which i don't want to have. She is hosting her 2 years olds birthday in a couple of weeks and i just don't think i can face it.

I feel my first period is coming too after my surgery so particularly low these past few days. 😫

Also where is the bloody summer?

Rant over.

@Jecca88 I totally get this! I think I posted about this before but I had a total (public crying) meltdown when my SIL announced her second unplanned perfectly developing pregnancy a few weeks ago just after we'd had our fourth loss in a year. Fortunately she's absolutely lovely, but I have been so worried about being around them - I'm already stressing about Christmas when they'll have their two babies there. I had a friend who was very intensive when I was going through losses in 2021 before I had my daughter - same thing, found out about my mc and then about two days later started an incessant campaign of bump posts on social media, I've never really been able to get over it and how hurtful it was to me. If you need to not go to the birthday, don't go. Protect your peace. People will understand.

@VenusStarr hope you get some news today.

@v60 these cycles like to test us don't they?! Have you had anovulatory cycles before? Or is this an anomaly?

Thanks @lozzmax makes me feel less insane. I do remember you posting that, how you feeling now about it? Luckily we found out via Text. I was super anxious to go to party anyway as i had my suspicions and just had an idea they would do an announcement. First time found this is what they did and filmed everyones reactions - thinking about that now makes me feel sick. I am sorry you're friend did that, i do think even if i had never had a miscarriage i would like to think i would never do that to anyone. Are you still friends with them? I will never get over it either and actually its the only thing me and husband argue about as he just wants everyone to get on. Yeh I think i will just say I am ill a few days before, a little white lie.

@lozzmax and @Gizmo1983 While we were still undergoing various tests, I didn’t track my ovulation with OPKs because it wasn’t recommended for us to conceive. So I actually don’t know if it’s a one off or not. I’ll track again this month and see, maybe with another brand of OPKs. I can’t do BBT because my toddler wakes at various times. Google tells me you can have EWCM but not ovulate, which I don’t think I realised before. Anyway, my period finally arrived and glass of wine in hand. Must’ve been my whining post.

I simply cannot imagine someone filming reactions to an announcement. So ego centric. I do find it challenging when others in real life announce a pregnancy generally - I suddenly feel all sorts of things all at once, like someone said - ugly things. It’s not that I’m not happy for them, it’s just that my first thing is “why not me, will it ever be me again” and that needs a bit of space, and, I admit I’m jealous of that naivety of straightforward pregnancy - good for them, but…that's not our experience. For women who have had loss, it does give me hope, it feels like a different thing all together

@Jecca88 @lozzmax my little sister announced she is 'accidentally' pregnant with no.3 a few weeks back... my world crumbled and I couldn't work for a few days. It seems crazy to me that it can be so easy for some to make and keep babies. It's as though she exists in an entirely different universe - as in my world these things don't work out. Ugly feelings all over the place at the moment, especially now finding out I'm pregnant. I was pregnant either side of her last pregnancy and both mine were losses and she had a beautiful baby girl. I'm really not sure how to cope with it all again! I'm having to take a step back and not see her. Which is sad, but I just can't handle the pain it causes me seeing her. All this is to say, I get it too, qnd I've accepted now that ugly feelings are okay and unfortunately they don't go away - but I no longer berate myself for feeling them xx

I'm waiting for my second hcg blood results to come through this morning and I'm so nervous 😟

❤️ @HopefulH will they come back today?

Thank you all for the supportive messages. This week has been really awful for me. I had an incident with my new car yesterday and caused some damage (had it less than 24 hours 😢) and I had a massive panic attack and it's completely thrown me and knocked my confidence.
I did hear from the hospital and my appt is next Tuesday evening, so I'm staying off work until I've been seen.

I hope everyone is doing ok. Lots of love xx