CD1 ttc after loss carry on thread #3

[Ladyinpink1]

I went to reply and you were right, the thread was full so I couldnt post a link to a new thread, also, because it's a new thread it wont give me a prediction to tag when I type a name, so I have just copied and paste the names off of everyone who posted on the very last page of the thread, I hope anyone else can find it OK. Sorry, maybe there is an easier better way... if anyone else can remember extra names and spellings, please tag 🙂

@samilicious

@Wise0wl

@ThelastRolo20

@13lucy

@Bugdem123

@HerbaceousPerennial

@Ladyinpink1 I run so I can eat chocolate and all the good stuff 😂 takes the edge off the guilt.

It's so hard when people close to us announce pregnancies - I know we all know but it's okay to feel a bit crap for a while xx

@Ladyinpink1 where are you in your cycle at the moment? X

Helllo ladies, may I join in? I turned 35 last month and found out I was pregnant on my birthday (first official cycle ttc after a let’s wing it attempt the month before). Had a CP five days later. Ovulated later that month but alas no joy (wasn’t expecting much as I hadn’t had AF in between). AF arrived yesterday with awful cramps which is very unusual (thinking it’s a post cp thing for first AF). Positive is my cycle has returned relatively quickly. Only early on my journey but absolutely hating the waiting and unknown already! Wishing you all luck this month!

@ThelastRolo20 thank you, I need to hear that. I'm definitely overthinking everything at the moment and I think I will to some extent until I know everything is ok! Just had a 3 day period for my sixth cycle post miscarriage and I have no idea whether that's normal or not anymore.

@Ladyinpink1 sorry to hear that you've been dealing with difficult news. I know the feeling of an empty heart and it hurts so deeply! It's ok to feel that way and take your time to process x

You're right, just asking the GP doesn't hurt. They must think I'm mad though! I've been thinking about using private health insurance to have a consultant appointment. Would just be gynae and not fertility, but might give me some peace of mind around cycles/periods.

@B1989 welcome and sorry to hear about the CP. Good that you cycle has returned quickly!

@13lucy what were your cycle lengths before your miscarriage? X

@ThelastRolo20 run to eat ha ha, I love it. Have you started packing a few things yet?
I am cd17, normally my cycle is 26 days x

Welcome @B1989 I'm sorry for your loss and hoping things are a bit more normal for you after this period x

Thank you @13lucy I know what you mean sometimes the GP can make you feel like a nuisance when you ask them for help. Private would be great to see a consultant if it's not too much. x

@Ladyinpink1 no, not started packing but have bankrupted myself on vinted buying stuff for me and my daughter! Absolutely ridiculous 😂

If this month is unsuccessful for you we'll be pretty aligned date wise next month so I'll be keeping you company on my first month back (obviously hoping you get a BFP though!).

@samilicious well done on the exercise front! I turned down cake again today but then went on to have about 8 biscuits and a burger sooo.... 😂

@ThelastRolo20 that's amazing you've cut your running time down so much. I've never really liked running so tend to do cycling instead. And that's reassuring to hear your periods were the same whether it was surgical or natural. I've never bought anything from vinted but a few people have mentioned it recently. I want to get a leather jacket as my last one fell apart recently after many years so might have a look on there. I love getting holiday clothes so go for it!

@13lucy ahhh that's really hard. I remember my due date from before I had my son (or was preg again) and I cried my eyes out, had to go home from work. Thinking of you during this difficult time. Its so disheartening when it's not happening. I'm still unsure as to whether to see the GP or not, I just don't want to be told there is a low egg count or poor sperm quality or something because then I'd just lose all hope I think. 3 day period is normal for me pre-MC. I'd only have a heavier flow on one day and lighter flow the other days then maybe just some spotting on 4th day. But if that's not normal for you pre-MC then I'd speak to the GP about it. Is there one that you tend to speak to more often/listens a bit better? I find some GPs are better than others with certain things and when I find a good one I try to stick with them.

@Ladyinpink1 I sometimes initially feel really angry when people announce pregnancies. It's nothing they have done at all, it's all about me and my loss and feeling frustrated and sad. But I can feel like I actually am not happy for people. I feel like it's important for me to say that because we're expected to say we're happy for people and actually that's not always the reality and I think that's OK and doesn't mean we're bad people or anything for having those initial punched in the gut feelings (saying that more for myself than anyone else!). I wouldn't expect someone who'd had a miscarriage/struggling TTC to feel happy about my pregnancy if I got pregnant, and I'm genuinely OK with that. But I feel like society makes it not OK to feel anything but happiness for pregnancies. Obviously I would act perfectly respectfully to the person, these would just be my private feelings, but my feelings are valid and OK. As are yours. Sending you a hug if you would like it.

@B1989 welcome I've found this thread really supportive. Sorry about your loss.

I think I might ovulate at a more normal time for me this month as still have v low lh at the moment, even though my app is telling me it will be day 10. No idea why as the earliest its ever been is day 13, but I'm guessing it's something to do with my much shorter cycle last month.

Hi everyone! Back from my latest trip (Rotterdam this time!) and am now home until mid June except stuff in the UK haha.

Did my clearblue ovulation test today expecting it to be empty circle because it's a new reader, but nope, static smiley!! Thankfully we dtd last night so it's today and tomorrow too now 🙈 last few cycles have been a bit longer so wasn't expecting to get the static smiley for another 48hrs! We go again lol

@UrsulaSings123 yeah I imagine it's going off of last month's dates, all you can do is keep testing!

@moosey89 you are one busy lady 😂 great news about the static and timing with DTD. Fingers crossed 🤞🏻

I'm about a week away from my TTC cycle starting. I don't think I've ever looked forward to an AF more....

@ThelastRolo20 thanks! Yeah I'm currently exhausted hahaha was working 6am to 9pm Saturday and Sunday.

So exciting you're nearly there! Best of luck for next cycle, if this month isn't successful I'll see you in late April for my next cycle haha

Hello ladies, very sad to be joining this thread (not because of you, but the circumstances!), but here I am. Went for a private scan yesterday at 10.5 weeks and found the baby had died a week ago, no heartbeat and measuring 9 weeks. We had a viability scan at 6 weeks and saw a heartbeat. I’m floored. I’ve had MC before I had my DS who is now 6, but never a MMC. I can’t believe it, I’m utterly heartbroken and shocked and mighty pissed off all in one.

The private scan was a disgrace and we were offered no explanation really and our dead baby just left on a huge 60inch screen whilst I got dressed and we left.

My EPAU can’t see me until Thursday and even then, I don’t know what they’ll do. Will they make me wait yet another week for a rescan? I want a surgically managed route as I cannot face the utter trauma of a natural miscarriage until then, so I’m going to carry on using my progesterone pessaries until then to hopefully stop it happening on its own.

Any advice would be grateful received about what’s to come, please don’t hold back - I need and want to be prepared. I can’t take any more nasty surprises.

@Jellybelly888 oh I'm so sorry, I've had two MMC, they're so painful. As baby will be over 7mm they can confirm a MC there and then (they'll need two sonographers to confirm it) and then they'll book you in for surgery.

I found my surgical management really straight forward, I also did have a natural miscarriage after my first MMC and that was equally straight forward for what it's worth, but of course do what's right for you. We all understand the emotions so we'll be here with you along the way so you don't feel quite so alone x

@Jellybelly888 I'm so sorry 😞 that's a very similar experience to my first MMC, had a good scan at 7 weeks then no heartbeat at 11 weeks and measuring 9 weeks. I don't have any advice on it happening naturally - I found out on a Saturday, went to EPU for a confirmation scan on the Monday, then had surgery 2 days later.

I've had surgical management twice and the physical recovery was pretty straightforward, but take time emotionally - sending you all the love. This chat is really supportive and caring so message anything/anytime you need xx

@Jellybelly888 I went with expectant management but wish I didn’t. I wanted to hold on to the pregnancy as long as possible since it took so long to conceive. But I hated the feeling of not knowing when it’s gonna happen and even after it did I had an incomplete miscarriage had to stay in a hospital for a day, they gave me methergine injection but that also didn’t clear everything so I was full on bleeding for 3weeks before everything cleared out. I’m on cycle 2 post mmc, we started trying straight away but my cycles are now irregular.

Thank you @ThelastRolo20 that’s really helpful to know. I think I just tread threads where people had to go back a week later but it was earlier than 6 weeks maybe. The baby was measuring 12mm to I’m sure they will be able to tell there and then. The private clinic was just a shambles so I hope it’s a bit more informative at the EPAU. Glad the surgical route was relatively straight forward, that’s eased my mind. My three MC before DS started on their own and they were traumatic enough for me to never want to have to navigate that ever again, so if I have the option this time I will definitely choose surgery. Were you able to TTC soon after?

@moosey89 thank you for your kind words and support, it means a lot. I’m sorry you have been through this too, I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. Did your cycles return ok after the surgical management? X

@emmatcc1 so sorry, that horrific. Does that mean you decided to wait for it to start itself? Sorry for being thick, I’ve just never had a choice so not sure of the option terms. My MCs that happened themselves luckily all went well (if you can call a MC well? 🤦‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️) but like you’ve said, I wouldn’t choose that option again if given a choice.

I wish you all the luck for your TTC journey. Xx

@Jellybelly888 I found out at my 8 week scan that baby was measuring 5-6 weeks so I had to go back a week later to confirm it’s not growing and they gave me a referral to have medical management but I decided I wanted to wait for it to pass naturally at home and I started bleeding 2 days after my last scan. I still needed to go to the hospital because my blood type is negative and I needed rhogam injection.

@ThelastRolo20 aww super cute!
I panicked when I picked my MN username 😂 wanted something different than socials and used it once jokingly as my phone gamer tag (did you ever play that game Temple Run about 10 year ago? 😂). Sounds like someone on a sex chat thing
Well done on beating your time, love the idea of sharing something positive 🥰
Also well done for getting so many bargs on Vinted. I just picked up a next order for mine and regretting it already 💸

@13lucy I always felt the same about the surgery decision, by my friend just had an MVA and they still had retained products, then they tested them and found it was a partial molar. She might have to have pre-chemo and all sorts. This was the friend I was mega upset about being preg earlier in the year. I want to check my report to see what mine was now! They didn't say the actual thickness. Let's get thickening our lining 💪🏻 I'm hoping exercising more and increasing my step count will increase blood flow, eat more nuts and seeds and...

Did someone on here say they take an L-Arginine supplement?

@Ladyinpink1 ohh horrible :( there's something in the air at the moment! Maybe because it's spring. Why can't we be spring chickens too 🤪 how did you found out? People can be super insensitive. I know it sounds harsh but I don't think they ever appreciate their babies in the same way someone who's lost does either though.

@B1989 welcome and so sorry for your CP ♥️

@UrsulaSings123 haha! Well at least you knew you really wanted the biscuits and burger to not turn them down

@moosey89 well done for catching the static with DTD! I need tips on managing stress with your two jobs

@Jellybelly888 so sorry try this is happening to you ♥️ I also had a terrible experience with a private scan you didn't spot a very obvious abnormality with my baby that resulted in TFMR. Think they're only worth checking for heartbeats, early sex reveal or 4D if you want to see them later and not much else. I had MVA and had shorter and lighter cycles since but after a year my cycles are longer and flow a bit heavier so kinda back to normal

@Jellybelly888 my surgery was late Jan and we have actually taken a break as we're away next week on holiday, and after two back to back MMCs within 4 months I thought I deserved a glass of wine or two when away 😂

My cycles are pretty much back to normal though so will be back to trying next cycle. AF should arrive early - mid next week (so a partial overlap with holiday). My first due date to pass is the weekend we come back (28th April) but feeling okay about it mostly.

I've been pretty fortunate so far to conceive within 2 cycles each time, and I have a living daughter who was issue free from the get go so I live in hope, not fear ❤️

@Jellybelly888 I'm so sorry you're going through this. I had surgical management just over a month ago and I'm glad that it was all over and I didn't have to go through weeks of bleeding. If the baby is measuring over 7mm then you wont have to wait a week for it to be confirmed.

My 1st period after only lasted less than 2 days so I'm hoping this month will be more normal. We are TTC straight away. It's honestly the most jarring experience ever to go from elation at being pregnant to absolute despair at everything that has been lost - not only the baby itself but an alternate future that was coming alive in your mind. I hope you are taking some time for yourself. Sending you a hand hold if you would like it. It's helped me so much the support of others on here, knowing I'm not alone.

Oooh I love vinted @ThelastRolo20 Yes that will be lovely to have your company x

No cake but 8 biscuits and a burger 🤣 the cake was probably super high in calories so you did the right thing. @UrsulaSings123 thank you for taking the time to type all of that out, that's exactly right and how I feel too, oh yes, hug accepted 😊 that's great if ovulation will be a bit more normal this cycle for you, I hope it brings good news x

Happy days @moosey89 hope all went well with the trip x

I'm so sorry for your loss @Jellybelly888 it's even harder when you have had a scan confirming all was OK because you get your hopes up and believe all is well which makes the shock so much worse. And your treatment at the scan was not ok, I can still remember the feeling when you find out, it's like your stomach falling out of your body, it's just awful, sending a hug to you, anything we can help with or chat about, please just say. I'm also happy to share my experience if it helps at all, i have had 2 mmc, my miscarriage in August, I had a scan at about 8/9 weeks which showed a strong heartbeat then I started bleeding out of the blue just before my 12 week scan, went to the epu the next day and they confirmed baby had died (right after the 9 week scan from size), where I live they send you home for a week to see if things will progress naturally before they do anything more and they did progress on their own for me x

We will be spring chickens lol. We are spring chickens, young things 🤣 @samilicious when is af due for you? x

@Ladyinpink1 I’m so sorry to hear about your MMCs, it sounds horrific and your scan sounds really distressing. Yes the private scan was absolutely awful and really not ok, as @samilicious says that private scans are not great for anything but extras really, I definitely won’t be using them again at all. I had one with my DS at 10 weeks 6 years ago and it was all great and dandy, but then yesterday had put me off for life.

@UrsulaSings123 thank you for the reassurance about hopefully not having to wait another week to be scanned. My notes from the private clinic say that the baby was 18mm so hopefully that’s over the threshold. I spoke to my midwife today and she’s really confused me because she said they will probably want to scan me in a weeks time after my initial appointment on Thursday. I mentioned the size thing and she said she didn’t know and it wasn’t her department, so I just hope she’s getting mixed up. To wait a whole other week is like torture. Glad to hear your period returned ok and it was fairly light, good to hear you’re TTC again, I hope you’re not finding it too stressful or making you anxious. I wish you all the luck and baby dust in the world xx