Have I missed the boat? is 35 too old to conceive?

[BrandySnaps1]

Have been trying for 7 months, brought ovulation sticks, still nada. Last month period was 4 days late - i was elated especially as i have been tracking like clockwork since the summer.

Period came and the cramps were the worst they have ever been and very heavy flow. Would have loved to have had 2/3 children, but am now worried as Im 35 and focused on my career all this time. Only to quit last year due to burn out and now focusing on mental and physical health.

Seems like a catch 22 situation and now I feel stuck, anxious, worried, did i make the right decision with anything? No mat leave, no children. Could really use some helpful opinions please.

Thank you I saw gp last year and had bloods tested all was ok. The fact I had a Mc in July I guess is a positive I can still conceive just need that good egg and for it to stick I hope.

Definitely not too old! I conceived my 3rd child at age 38 after 3 months of trying, I'm now 39 and 23 weeks gone!

I'd start by booking a GP appointment to make sure there's no issue with either you or your DP, if that comes back clear then I'd monitor your body's signs of ovulation, you don't need ovulation sticks. Sorry if it's graphic, but you will have egg white consistency discharge when you're ovulating (clear). Once your period has finished I would have sex every few days until you finish ovulating.

I know it's easier said that done, but if all tests come back clear then you need to RELAX, as I swear stress stops you from conceiving. I swear we did because we actually thought We had missed the boat that month, but nope lol.

Thank you yes we actually conceived when we relaxed when I had the miscarraige so maybe just need to relax relax relax.

It's definitely all about the relaxing!

My mum had my brother at 42. Don't give up hope.

Good luck x

I only met my husband at 37 and had our first child at 41, second at 43. You've not missed the boat x

@BrandySnaps1 keep going! Speak to your GP.

I’m 38. Nothing had happened in a year of trying so my GP referred me for investigations. To cut a long story short: work stress was impacting me more than I realised as it had sent one of my key hormones plummeting. Decided to continue with investigations but mentally prepared myself to leave the job and start looking elsewhere.

Now in a new job… and at 20wks!

Aww don’t lose hope, had friends that tried for 2 years and then it just happened, I’m 44 and recently found out pregnant, natural conception

Stop trying would be my advice. Throw away the sticks and tracking calendar. Just have sex a few times a week, without thinking you might be making a baby. Try and enjoy yourself! If no success in a year, see your GP.

@BrandySnaps1 Sis I am in exactly the same boat, reading your post is like reading my own thoughts/situation (except I kept the stressful job, and turned down the job of my dreams because it had only statutory mat leave and knew I wanted to TTC...). But. Likewise, same age and have now been trying for first pregnancy 6-7mths, twice had periods 1-2 weeks late, I don't test obsessively but did get a BFN when late on so prob never even conceived.

This month I'm absolutely going for it, just finished a brutal (and late) AF, like you I use the advanced clearblue OPK but might even start BBT after reading the posts here.

And if it doesn't work out this month I'm doing the fertility tests and GP. Feels like no time to waste. So just to say I know how you feel, I do think our age makes it harder, and hope we get there soon ❤️

Don't believe all the negativity around being older and getting pregnant. I had my first with my hubby at age 40. I think women just need to be more in tune with their own bodies to determine when you're ovulating and such. I know infertility is an issue for some but their are so so Many stories of perfectly fertile women of all different age groups not being able to get pregnant and I firmly believe alot has to do with the modern "tools" getting in the way. Your body knows what to do and when you just need to listen to the cues and trust nature to do her job.

My friend, who has PCOS, had her first at 42 and second at 43 (12.5 months apart!). Natural conceptions.

I had my first at almost 36 and my second I was nearly 40. Took 7 months first time and just over a year the second. I had a very early loss / chemical the month before my second stuck.

So I don't think you are too late, obviously we're all different but I'd carry on a bit longer before worrying and having tests.

Thanks ladies great to hear so many same age bracket and in the same boat. Give me possative vibes. X good luck everyone.

My DC were conceived when I was 35 and 37.

Let us know how you get on. I left my job in 2022 due to burn out and it was only last summer we started trying consistently. I worry about getting another full time job now, and hope i get pregnant soon but then would have to leave the job, and probably wont be eligble for mat leave. Ive been doing some contract work to keep me going.

Im already getting my usual bloated feeling before period comes. and DH is away during our prime baby making time so it feels like anothe r2 months are lost :( Its hard not to get down about it. All these external circumstances dont help our situation

Fertility starts to decline around 30 and most women are more or less infertile by 45. But the rate at which that happens varies hugely from person to person, as you might expect. 35 isn't that old. Kept trying til a year is up and then seek help.

Anyone tested this morning?? I'm 8dpo and want to wait see if AF turns up as don't want to stress or waste money. Had accupuncture yesterday was very relaxing and based on all info I gave her she said I have just as much chance of conceiving a successful pregnancy as anyone else despite my age so hopefully it will happen gave me possative vibes anyway.

when is AF due to arrive

AMH is more important than age... it's true that fertility does not just magically fall off a cliff at 35 but the studies are clear: you might have a harder time staying pregnant 🙏 this is not to scare you but just to be aware that miscarriages are higher in older women
At 35 you still have time, get your levels checked and speak to a fertility specialist

Exactly re your 1st sentence

Hertility health are ace
150 gbp for many things tested
Including amh

If you've been on the pill it can take a while for your body to reset.

I had my first at 34 and second at 39. Before that I'd had unprotected sex after recently coming off the pill at about 29 and had what you describe. Body went into bloom, boobs hurty, period 3 to 4 weeks late, then worst period of life. (I wasn't trying consecutively between 29 and 34 BTW! Different relationship!)
At 34 I'd been off the pill a long time and it happened fast; within about 2 months of regular sex. 39 happened first try.

Monday Tuesday.x

Thankyou. AF is due to arrive anytime now.. i still have some hope this month, even though im terribly bloated and achy back (my usual period symptoms) started filling out the form to book an appointment with my gp but even writing ' ive been TTC with no luck' scared me and i chickened out. Will look into hertility, thankyou