Cd1 of ttc first cycle after loss... anyone want to join me? 🙂

[Ladyinpink1]

Hi 🙋‍♀️, just as the title says, I am now on cd1 of my first cycle after a loss at 11+4 (stopped growing just after a scan showing strong heartbeat at 8 -9w)

Feeling nervous but positive about a new cycle ...but finding it hard to think of anything else other than ttc 🙂

Happy for some company to obsess with over these next weeks x

@Bali200 thank you for your message. It’s true, I guess it’s giving me something to look forward to in such a dark time. Are you in the process of TTC now? How is your journey going?

@Ladyinpink1 Yeah, I’m hoping I don’t have long to wait either. I have heard the stories of people that managed to conceive rather quickly after a MC, I guess everyone is different also. At the moment, I think I’m on the last stage of bleeding but the PT is very much positive. I had my OB appointment a couple of days ago, and the sac has already been passed through, she mentioned just a few blood clots need to pass through. I actually went in to discuss having the D&C surgical procedure done, as the waiting for everything to happen and then just being stuck in limbo of being pregnant but not, I just felt I needed to put this behind me so I could grieve and move on.

But by the sounds of the responses, seems like I need to wait at least a week before I take another PT. Hoping I can get the negative sooner but I guess I’ll see.

@CluelessInLondon thank you for your well wishes. To be honest, I feel as though my emotions come and go in waves. Obviously, devastated, but more shocked, and just had the feeling, why? Why did my body fail me? What did I do wrong? Why me? I think now I’ve come to understand that none of this was my fault and it’s just something that happens that a lot of the time the body just can’t explain. But that sense of grief, I don’t think anyone can understand it unless they have been through it. Some responses from family, it’s been interesting to say the least. I know they mean well but it hasn’t exactly come across or been received in the way they had intended if that makes sense.

I guess it’s going to take some time till I get the negative. We definitely want to TTC and will be overjoyed when it happens. But then it’s the fear and doubt of history repeating itself.

@Rainbowpeanut02 it absolutely does help to focus on ttc again, it’s nice to feel positive and optimistic again after going through such a dark time, and it’s great that you think you’re nearly at the end of the bleeding, hopefully not too long until you ovulate, are you going to track ovulation?

I had a MMC in august with my first baby, they stopped growing at 8+4 but it was found at 12 week scan) and waited for my first period to arrive before ttc. I was very lucky to get my BFP two weeks ago on the second cycle trying, I’m now 6+1 and praying it’s a sticky one this time but just taking it day by day.

I still hang about here as it’s such a kind and supportive group and I can’t wait to see everyone get theirs too 💓 x

CD5 here now. I’m feeling quite fragile atm I think. Very wary about getting pregnant again as I don’t have any information about the previous losses and don’t want to walk into the same thing again, especially as my MMC took so long to present and then resolve. I’m wondering about private tests for blood clotting issues (the aspirin thing!) but only because my GP mentioned it yesterday, and also sperm fragmentation (if I can convince DH…) in search of some information and/or reassurance. There’s also a tiny wish that I could just give up the whole TTC thing and get on with my life! I know I’d regret not trying. But it’s scary :(

What tests are you expecting @Ladyinpink1 ? I’ve just had thyroid and iron done, testing progesterone later this cycle.

Hi everyone, I took a few days offline ahead of my scan at EPU (you are so kind to remember @Bali200 - better than DH who forgot momentarily 😂) as my anxiety was through the roof. I’ll catch up in full on all the messages as I’ve missed loads!

My scan was ok - they saw a heartbeat, but I’m measuring small, smaller than they thought I would at this stage. They can’t see a reason for the spotting but given the embryo has a heartbeat, they don’t think progesterone will help anyway. They’ve said they’ll scan again in two weeks which will give a bit more clarity. So, things to celebrate, and more things to worry about? X

@Rainbowpeanut02 sorry about your MMC, I was slightly further ahead than you at 12w (baby measured just shy of 10 w), and I think it's taken a period to finally clear the hormone out but it arrived after 4 weeks so not a long wait. Hopefully won't take you too long x

Oh @Wise0wl I’m so sorry that you don’t feel reassured and feel like you’re left in limbo. It is super positive though that you saw the heartbeat and that there’s no reason for the spotting. I hope that the little bean has a growth spurt and catches up by the next scan. How big is the baby measuring and is it possible that you ovulated late/implanted late? X

@Rainbowpeanut02 The emotions you describe are totally natural and really chime with me as you're describing exactly how I felt a couple of months ago - but I'm glad you are recognising that it's not your fault and it's not a failure on your part. I hope you get your negative test soon and you can start trying again when you feel ready. I waited a cycle to start TTC again and I'm really glad I did - I think I was a lot more psychologically ready after waiting a few weeks, and I don't think my hormones really settled down properly until after I'd had a period.

@Wise0wl I think you have to take the positive from your scan that you got to see the heartbeat and know that things are okay at the moment. I think that's all a scan can ever really offer, even though it would be so lovely to be told that everything's totally fine and will stay that way! Hopefully your little bean will catch up on measurements, it seems as though even just a few days can make quite a big difference and it's hard to be accurate when measuring something so tiny - fingers crossed for progress on your next scan.

3DPO here and bored of waiting for the end of my cycle already...! And I agreed with my husband last night that there'll be no testing unless my period doesn't arrive when I'm expecting it, to make sure I don't turn into crazy pregnancy test lady. 😬

So much to catch up on.

@Rainbowpeanut02 im so sorry to hear about your loss. It was two weeks later when I tested negative. I hope you don’t have to wait too long and you’re feeling as ok as you can do under the circumstances.

@Ladyinpink1 hope you are doing ok. It’s so hard to process that news on top of dealing with AF too. I have no experience of aspirin but definitely sounds a sensible thing to ask about at your next appointment.

Ive just been for my ultrasound. The sonographer told me that gynaecologically everything looks good so that’s a huge relief. I’m CD14 today and she said she could see an egg which is either rubbish quality (not the term she used 🤣) or delayed ovulation as it’s smaller than it should be. I am still full of a cold so hoping it’s just delayed ovulation. Sent myself into a googling frenzy now over the gel they use and if it’s sperm friendly given I’m in the middle of my fertile week!

Hi @Bali200 the epu put me on a waiting list for tests after multiple losses... i really dont have a clue what tests they do lol but I went to the GP straight after the miscarriage and requested general blood tests be done which all came back normal (thyroid, iron, b12, antibodies etc) so that I felt OK still trying while waiting for my appointment.
How are you feeling? B6 is great, very hopeful for you x

Thank you @CluelessInLondon and I hope your tww goes in fast x

@Oxalis00 I don't know what tests are done. There must be usual ones done at the epu so I will maybe Google and try to find out. I am cd5 too, also have the same fear. I keep hearing stories of people having losses then success after and never really knowing why it just being "one of those things" so I really hope that happens for us! x

Hi @Wise0wl glad to hear the news about the heartbeat but sorry you have been given more worrying too, hope these 2 weeks fly in so you can get some more clarity x

@Gem0302 Glad all went well (apart from her insulting your egg 🥚 how rude! 😀) but yes I have heard before sickness can delay ovulation so hopefully it's just a little later... by which stage the gel will be all flushed out anyways x

Thanks all. I’ve had a chance to digest it all and I am cautiously positive, especially as though I was secretly hoping to see a heartbeat but couldn’t admit it even to myself. They said they thought I’d be just over 6 weeks by now but I’m not measuring 6 weeks yet, but they didn’t want to try and date until next time because everything is so tiny. I guess the MMC just throws doubt on everything so it’s difficult not to immediately focus on the negative!

@Ladyinpink1 i hope you aren’t waiting too long, but good you had bloods in the meantime.

@CluelessInLondon the waiting is the worst! I hope it goes quickly for you and you've got some nice distractions over the next few weeks?

@Bali200 how are you feeling? I think (hope) I’m just behind you and only symptom at the mo is giant sore boobs 😂

@Bali200 Hi, I’m so sorry for your loss but so happy for you now, I hope this pregnancy goes along nice and smoothly. Hopefully I can get my negative soon but I think I still have a little while to wait for all the hormones to settle down. My cycle this year has been very irregular so I find ovulation tracking very helpful to me so yes definitely I will be checking my ovulation when everything is all clear. 😊

@ThelastRolo20 I’m so sorry for your loss,it’s always so hard to go with the motion of having a MC. I want to have the negative test so that I can TTC but I know it will also be a bittersweet moment.

@CluelessInLondon I think when I had the MMC, I honestly didn’t know how to move forward from this, but I do think time and surrounding yourself with positive people and groups like this have really helped me to cope and move forward one step at a time. It’s comforting to know especially in an awful time like this that I am not alone, however sad that may be and to also hear the positive news stories of everyone, also brightens my day and gives me hope. I think getting the negative test will help me get the closure and give me time to heal and consider TTC but I do agree that it’s important to be in the right headspace, so I will see how I feel and if I need extra time to focus on me, then I will definitely do that. 🫶🌺

@Gem0302 Thank you for your well wishes, I think by the sounds of the responses everyone’s timing is different, I guess all I can do is test and wait. I tested this morning, I guess I am pretty impatient haha, and it’s still positive though lighter than a few days ago, so yeah I definitely need to wait a little bit longer.

@Gem0302 Fingers crossed that it's just late ovulation for you with being under the weather. Glad your scan went well.

@Wise0wl I definitely don't feel like I have enough planned for the TWW this month! I have almost nothing on this weekend, which feels like a bit of a fail on my part.😂I'm going to try and take the opportunity to just relax though, maybe do a bit of pampering and catch up on some reading. I've got a wedding next weekend so at least won't be able to get distracted by any temptation to test early!

Wishing everyone a lovely weekend.🌻

@Wise0wl sending all my best thoughts to you and little one, always positive to have a heartbeat and hopefully they will catch up to their growth quickly ❤️ sorry that things aren’t exactly as hoped and that there’s some uncertainty there! X

@Gem0302 hows the weekend going, have you been testing with opks? Hopefully delayed ovulation! Im on letrozole because of PCOS so I’ve had a fair few scans, even with the mediation I often ovulate later on (but got pregnant last time with ovulation on cd18). Fingers crossed x

I got a positive opk yesterday, on my first cycle back on letrozole since the loss… haven’t had any ewcm for a couple of days which bothers me a bit but hopefully it will be fine. Now think I have a uti coming on but hopefully we’re covered if I do ovulate today! X

@graceinc22 i got a peak on the clear blue monitor last night but easy at home strips aren’t yet showing high so hopefully ovulation is near. I haven’t had any EWCM this cycle yet either. Looks like we’re both at similar stages, what CD are you on? Sorry to hear about the uti, hopefully it’s not and symptoms pass quick 🤞🏼

Good morning everyone! Hope you all had a lovely weekend. Where is everyone at in their cycles now? Are there some close to testing?

I am cd8 today, have decided to try the SMEP method this cycle but understand it's A LOT! lol will give it our best shot.
I also took my first easy at home opk strip this morning and it was nice and clear and easy to see so thank you for your recommendations. I noticed they do a Preg test also, has anyone tried it? And if so did it give evaps or anything? x

P.s what is the app please that everyone uses to compare which test is the peak? I have always done it by just looking but because they are new opks to me, I might try it. x

@Ladyinpink1 i use the Premom app. It’s free for all the features I need and I found it so much easier than just eyeballing the strip as I never really knew what I was looking for.

im CD22 and period is due Wednesday. I ovulated on CD 16/17.

I had a trans vagina scan as part of my fertility MOT last week and she said she could see a corpus luteum so I had ovulated but whether or not we timed everything right, I don’t know. I feel like with such short luteal phases it’s going to be impossible.

consultant appointment on Thursday to give results of the tests and by then my period may or may not have come. Who knows.

@Ladyinpink1 I also use premom. I'm cycle day 7 - haven't used their pregnancy ones though. I'm also basically going for SMEP this month. How long is your cycle normally? Looks like we'll be similar timing @SunSparkle hope the tests all go okay, fingers crossed you ovulated and it's good news this month x

@Ladyinpink1 I also use Premom - I'm not that convinced by the line ratios it throws out, for example my peak OPK this cycle looked like the test line was as dark as the control line but the number it gave me was only 0.75. But I find it helpful having somewhere to store all of the tests so I can look at and compare them.

@SunSparkle That's good that you've got the reassurance that you definitely ovulated this month. Fingers crossed that you got your timings right! Good luck for your appointment on Thursday.

6DPO over here and slowly descending into madness - I swear I woke up during the night with really sore boobs, but they felt absolutely fine this morning so I'm wondering whether I just dreamed it! 😅

Good luck to those having a go at SMEP this cycle - I absolutely do not have the energy for that!

@CluelessInLondon the two week window can do really funny things to us 😂 when are you planning on testing?

I have over a week until ovulation and that feels like an actual lifetime. Trying to be productive in work/ life in the meantime.

@ThelastRolo20 I'm not intending to test until/unless my period doesn't arrive when I'm expecting it - I really don't want to turn into a crazy lady doing tests every day! Period is due next Monday (probably - one of my apps says Monday, the other says Tuesday but based on what my cycle was like pre-MC it's probably due Monday) so I'll test after that if it doesn't show up. Makes the wait longer but also means I don't stress myself out doing tests every day!

I can't decide what's worse, the start of the cycle and waiting to ovulate or the end of it and the TWW - seems a bit ridiculous that there are only 5/6 days in the month where you aren't just wanting everything to hurry up!

@CluelessInLondon completely understand waiting, I normally would but my work Xmas party is on 9th which should be 10 DPO. I'll have to decide nearer the time whether to test or not!

I know, most of it is just spent waiting for time to hurry up 😂 luckily work and Christmas is keeping me plenty busy, the week will fly by I know it.

Thank you @SunSparkle I took an ovulation test this morning and although the other line is lighter, it is still pretty dark in colour and so i'm worried it wont be as easy to see when it does turn positive.
What cycle number is this for you ttc since loss? Just thinking maybe your LH will get longer with time once things settle down. That's good the scan showed ovulation x

Thank you, and That's good to have company @ThelastRolo20 I think @Oxalis00 might be similar timing as us also. I am out for a coffee tonight so will need to muster up the energy when I get home for cd8 so the first dtd day. Lol. Just hoping our peak comes at the weekend when we have more time (and energy) x

Thank you @CluelessInLondon and 6dpo is great, getting so close but yes definitely after ovulation everyday goes super slow. Waiting is definitely sensible, I havent managed to do that yet any cycle but I really should as the early testing is a torture x