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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

I've been silly but I really need advice!

165 replies

Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 13:46

So please don't judge me for this as I am already punishing myself and my stupid choices as it is.
I have just come back from a holiday, where I ended up sleeping with one of the locals out there.
For reference I have not had sex in 3.5 years through personal choice after an awful break up with an emotional abuser, I have chosen to protect myself and my best interests by staying away from men! However a few drinks in the Sun and some charm from him ended up with us in bed together.
Fast forward to now, last night I went to the loo and noticed some pale pink discharge on the tissue when I wiped, as this was so unusual for me it led me to check my Flo app and I have absolutely shit myself when I realised I was ovulating (or so the app says) on the exact day I slept with him. We had sex numerous times with no protection (I know, I know!) as I haven't been with anyone in such a long time it sort of slipped my mind.
For further reference I have an 18 year old already and since I gave birth to him I have never had a pregnancy scare or anything similar as I have always been on the implant (which I removed early last year)
My app tells me that I am 7DPO and that I should do a pregnancy test in 9 days if I don't come on my period.
Alongside the pink discharge, the cramps in my tummy and tender breasts today I am now actually panicking that I may have brought home something more than memories from my holiday!
If I am pregnant then I already know that I would keep my child and I would have to tell him about it but am I just overthinking?

I am new to all of this and would really appreciate some advice from you all about whether it's just a coincidence or if these signs/symptoms are actually that of conception/implantation.
Please don't judge me for this I understand I have been a bit daft sleeping with someone I had only just met and I especially can't speak to any of my family or friends about this right now.
Is there anything I should be looking out for or should I relax and go with the flow? As you can tell I wasn't actively trying to conceive however if it turns out that way i will see it as a late life blessing. If it matters I am 38...

If you got this far thank you for reading ❤️

OP posts:
CurlewKate · 04/06/2023 13:48

Your first step should be an STD clinic, to be honest.

OhHeyBabe · 04/06/2023 13:48

Was it 7 days ago you had sex then or shorter? Are you out of the time frame for morning after pill? No judgement here

Original poster
Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 13:49

CurlewKate · 04/06/2023 13:48

Your first step should be an STD clinic, to be honest.

This was exactly what I was planning to do as soon as the clinic opens tomoro call them and get an appointment!

OP posts:
Original poster
Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 13:50

OhHeyBabe · 04/06/2023 13:48

Was it 7 days ago you had sex then or shorter? Are you out of the time frame for morning after pill? No judgement here

To be really honest I have no idea about the morning after pill or anything like that I haven't ever had to take one or like I say had a scare like this before. I slept with him on Sunday last week so exactly seven days ago! However on saying that I do believe if I was pregnant, terminating wouldn't be an option for me ❤️

OP posts:
Original poster
Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 13:53

I only got home last night and I think as soon as reality hit and I was back on home turf I've realised how stupid I have been!
And if I'm being really really honest I didn't even think afterwards of anything like oh my god can't believe I've done that: I think I was just there in the moment and enjoying it when really I should have actually thought about what I'd just done.
The only reason i even THOUGHT about pregnancy was because of the pink discharge as I've never seen that before hence me checking the app, I still didn't think pregnancy until I recorded unprotected sex on my app.
Don't even ask me what's been going on in my head I've been an oblivious idiot and I totally get that people may think that too!

OP posts:
Ishareyourissue · 04/06/2023 13:55

I have the flo app. It’s always sending me notifications about high chances to get pregnant on certain cycle days etc to the point it annoying I get quite a few - I’d have thought of you had the app you’d have hit these and even of notifications are off if you’ve checked it it’ll tell you .

Def too late for the morning after pill. The pink discharge could be implantation bleeding. You’ll have to test in a few days time. Def get an std check

Ishareyourissue · 04/06/2023 13:56

If you’re recording unprotected sex in your app then maybe subconsciously you knew ?

Before going away didn’t you check your cycle dates? Amongst my friends and family we always do that as never want a period when away if it’s warm etc and want to have fun

Original poster
Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 13:58

Ishareyourissue · 04/06/2023 13:55

I have the flo app. It’s always sending me notifications about high chances to get pregnant on certain cycle days etc to the point it annoying I get quite a few - I’d have thought of you had the app you’d have hit these and even of notifications are off if you’ve checked it it’ll tell you .

Def too late for the morning after pill. The pink discharge could be implantation bleeding. You’ll have to test in a few days time. Def get an std check

Yep I did the same as you and turned them off! I only tracked my periods because after coming off the implant last year they were a little all over the place but they've been on a regular cycle for a good 5 months now so I only ever log in on the first day of my period and record it on the last day too hence me not even realising about ovulation or anything like that!
I must sound about 13 here and acting dumb but I guess because it's been such a long time since I had my first child and I've always had protected sex over the years things like that just never even entered my head!
Thank you for your response ❤️

OP posts:
Original poster
Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 13:59

Ishareyourissue · 04/06/2023 13:56

If you’re recording unprotected sex in your app then maybe subconsciously you knew ?

Before going away didn’t you check your cycle dates? Amongst my friends and family we always do that as never want a period when away if it’s warm etc and want to have fun

I added the unprotected sex onto it last night I had to Google how to do it because I've only ever used it for period tracking and nothing else!

OP posts:
Original poster
Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 13:59

Ishareyourissue · 04/06/2023 13:56

If you’re recording unprotected sex in your app then maybe subconsciously you knew ?

Before going away didn’t you check your cycle dates? Amongst my friends and family we always do that as never want a period when away if it’s warm etc and want to have fun

I also didn't check my cycle dates because I had a period just before I went I knew I wouldn't have one whilst there if that makes sense?

OP posts:
Itsanotherhreatday · 04/06/2023 14:00

DFriend also 38 had a baby after a fling. It happens!

More woman in their 40’s have abortions than teens - maybe something g flips in out brains to trick us into pregnancy?

Let us know how you get on.

Ishareyourissue · 04/06/2023 14:02

Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 13:59

I also didn't check my cycle dates because I had a period just before I went I knew I wouldn't have one whilst there if that makes sense?

Show quote history

You must have short cycles then ! I always get so annoyed as mine are so long and when I get them they are so heavy so for any holidays I make sure i def won’t be bleeding!

The only times I’ve ever had spotting 6/7/8 dpo has been implantation and I’ve then got positive tests at 10/11 dpo if you get a first response test they are the most sensitive i think

Enn1234 · 04/06/2023 14:17

Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 13:46

So please don't judge me for this as I am already punishing myself and my stupid choices as it is.
I have just come back from a holiday, where I ended up sleeping with one of the locals out there.
For reference I have not had sex in 3.5 years through personal choice after an awful break up with an emotional abuser, I have chosen to protect myself and my best interests by staying away from men! However a few drinks in the Sun and some charm from him ended up with us in bed together.
Fast forward to now, last night I went to the loo and noticed some pale pink discharge on the tissue when I wiped, as this was so unusual for me it led me to check my Flo app and I have absolutely shit myself when I realised I was ovulating (or so the app says) on the exact day I slept with him. We had sex numerous times with no protection (I know, I know!) as I haven't been with anyone in such a long time it sort of slipped my mind.
For further reference I have an 18 year old already and since I gave birth to him I have never had a pregnancy scare or anything similar as I have always been on the implant (which I removed early last year)
My app tells me that I am 7DPO and that I should do a pregnancy test in 9 days if I don't come on my period.
Alongside the pink discharge, the cramps in my tummy and tender breasts today I am now actually panicking that I may have brought home something more than memories from my holiday!
If I am pregnant then I already know that I would keep my child and I would have to tell him about it but am I just overthinking?

I am new to all of this and would really appreciate some advice from you all about whether it's just a coincidence or if these signs/symptoms are actually that of conception/implantation.
Please don't judge me for this I understand I have been a bit daft sleeping with someone I had only just met and I especially can't speak to any of my family or friends about this right now.
Is there anything I should be looking out for or should I relax and go with the flow? As you can tell I wasn't actively trying to conceive however if it turns out that way i will see it as a late life blessing. If it matters I am 38...

If you got this far thank you for reading ❤️

Hi OP
I think the best thing to do is to wait now and then do a pregnancy test and see what happens

Original poster
Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 14:17

@Ishareyourissue I honestly don't even know what that means, do you mean the length between when my period ends and the next one starts? If so they've gotten quite regular over the last few months and seem to be quite bang on the date I'm due.
My last period started on 13th May and ended on 17th. My ovulation dates (so the app says) were on 28/29th (it's got a little circle highlighted on the calendar bit) and I had sex on the 28 AND the 29th. So now it's saying that I should test if my period doesn't come.
Does that make more sense? Sorry I know I'm bloody useless and can't make sense of it myself like I said I just didn't think I have never tracked ovulation or anything like that!

OP posts:
Original poster
Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 14:19

@Enn1234 I think you're absolutely right no amount of talking about it will change anything now. I'm trying to relax but I genuinely am a bit stressed about it. Not trying to be a drainer just thought if anywhere could help me to work it out it would be here or at least offer me a bit of support ❤️

OP posts:
AthenaPopodopolous · 04/06/2023 14:27

Well you sound quite happy to be pregnant potentially. Anyway tell us was he a hunk? What country were you in? Sounds very romantic.
Id just send him a cute baby pic to let him know he’s a father when the time comes.
makes me think that hormones really take over when it comes to us women reproducing, it’s just a biological urge isn’t it? Anyway congratulations if you are expecting.

RunningFromInsanity · 04/06/2023 14:30

You sound like you want to be pregnant.
Waving your child off to spend time (potentially abroad) with a complete stranger?

Original poster
Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 14:30

AthenaPopodopolous · 04/06/2023 14:27

Well you sound quite happy to be pregnant potentially. Anyway tell us was he a hunk? What country were you in? Sounds very romantic.
Id just send him a cute baby pic to let him know he’s a father when the time comes.
makes me think that hormones really take over when it comes to us women reproducing, it’s just a biological urge isn’t it? Anyway congratulations if you are expecting.

You know what I never thought I would have another baby or anything like that being single for years and having a grown up son but honestly?... I would be over the moon actually and would see it as nothing but a blessing. Life's been a bit shit for a while now and I think this could potentially change my whole life 🥰
Thank you for your lovely message. He was absolutely gorgeous I won't lie! 😂

OP posts:
Original poster
Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 14:30

RunningFromInsanity · 04/06/2023 14:30

You sound like you want to be pregnant.
Waving your child off to spend time (potentially abroad) with a complete stranger?

LOL

OP posts:
Enn1234 · 04/06/2023 14:42

Bismillah2023 · 04/06/2023 14:19

@Enn1234 I think you're absolutely right no amount of talking about it will change anything now. I'm trying to relax but I genuinely am a bit stressed about it. Not trying to be a drainer just thought if anywhere could help me to work it out it would be here or at least offer me a bit of support ❤️

Keep us posted if you get a positive pregnancy test!
Are you still in contact with the potential baby father?
What country did you go for a holiday?

ArseMenagerie · 04/06/2023 14:48

He didn’t use contraception either… not just you being silly :) takes two!

I hope it works out!

Subtlety1985 · 04/06/2023 15:13

You’ll be able to test six days before your next period is due with a ‘digital clear blue early detection test’.

Good luck OP!

Bluebell0921 · 04/06/2023 15:15

I feel like you’re being quite hard on yourself. Of course there’s a possibility you will be pregnant, it only takes 1 time and it sounds like you had sex around ovulation time. It sounds like you’d be ok with being pregnant though and you had a good time with this sexy man 😏. Can’t change what happened, but it sounds like you’ll be ok whatever happens. It’s gonna be a long week waiting to see if that period arrives! Wishing you the best with whatever happens and deffo get that STD check xx

muffinmclay22 · 04/06/2023 15:18

Zero judgement from me. Nobody can tell you whether you're pregnant or not based on these symptoms you are just going to have to wait it out and do a test.

Are you in a position to raise a child alone? Would you want to?

Agree that an STI check is definitely in order.

I hope you the result you want but based on the dates and symptoms there is a very real possibility that you're pregnant.

Redburnett · 04/06/2023 15:22

The person most likely to judge you is your existing child. Make sure you prioritise their best interests whatever happens.