Trying to conceive over 40 part 4

[October1979]

Hi girls here is a new thread as we have nearly reached the 1000 limit x

@Kelb79 Wow, what a confusing response. I can see why you’re losing your mind!! I echo @October1979 in asking for a clarification call. They should be able to at least give you the basics of when the eggs and sperm were mixed, how many fertilised, how many have progressed onwards. I’d want to know what the reluctance to comment is about. It may just be that they can’t/won’t/are reluctant to share embryo grading at this point? My clinic didn’t tell me embryo grades unless i specifically asked. I decided not to as I knew it’d be something I spent hours googling if I got to transfer 😳 Is there any information in your contract about what information or data they’ll provide at each stage? x

@unicornglitter123 I’m so sorry, AF arrival day really is shit 😞 I’ll definitely join you with virtual wine, hope you’re doing OK x

@unicornglitter123 im all over that virtual 🍷 but mine might be 🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🤣🤣

@October1979 @YellowLoafers i pushed hard and actually got a call from my Dr. Totally against protocol (this clinic is now on zero info on donor cycles until the final lab report) and I’m now even more stressed but know the whole situation which definitely helps.
its as I thought! They cycled a donor who got eggs but none fertilised! 😳 so they had to start again with a new donor. She has her egg collection tomorrow ffs!! So day 5 will be the day I’m due to fly out with my transfer booked for the next day 😳😳 I asked about delaying transfer but basically it means scrapping this cycle and starting again which id obviously rather not do.
So it’s now a case of wait more and hope more and stress more 🤦🏼‍♀️
I’ve got my Dr to agree to giving me info along the way now so I’ll just have to hold off on booking and hope for the best 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
Positive vibes appreciated ❤️❤️❤️❤️

@Kelb79 that sounds soooo frustrating!! I found it v annoying how difficult it was to contact the lab directly at every clinic: I'm not sure why they have to be so inaccessible!! Hopefully you get to speak with someone today who can tell you something more useful than your coordinator has...

@YellowLoafers all fingers crossed for the 12 wk scan : brilliant that you are at 9 weeks already!!

I am now 33 wks....they won't let me go beyond 39 wks (because of my age + ivf), so not that long to go! I had a complete meltdown on my oh last weekend, I think probably mostly down to hormones and also the feeling that there's no going back now...! we still haven't told anyone that it's de (my husband's choice, he wants to wait until after the baby arrives, and I respect that), and i met up with friends who were talking about how x's first daughter looks like her husband, second daughter looks like x etc which I know is very natural and usual (I do it too!) but I think it just made me a bit sad to know that this baby won't look like me (or if they do, it's luck rather than genetics). It's not everyone's experience, but i have found that I have lots of conflicting and complex emotions around carrying a de baby, and I suspect there are going to be a few more ups and downs along the way. And i guess that makes sense: I am still grieving the fact that we couldn't make it work with my own eggs, and no one expects grief to be linear. I am excited and grateful to be having this very much wanted baby, but there is still a tinge of sadness there...

Oh wow @Kelb79 sorry, my reply must have posted with a delay, just saw your update! I can't believe that happened, but so glad they managed to find you a new donor so quickly!! so do they have frozen sperm from your oh already? No wonder your coordinator didn't really know what to tell you...hopefully now you have direct contact with your consultant you'll be kept better informed. All fingers crossed for the next 5 days for you!!

@99pctpractice omg I can’t believe you’re at 33 weeks!! Where does the time go?! 😳😳 I hope the last few weeks go well for you lovely 🙏🏼❤️
yeah, super stressful our end but at least we’ve got information now, that helps! And as long as we know what’s happening along the way we can make our own decisions as to whether it’s worth travelling over. Hope to hear something today but probably won’t get told until tomorrow after fertilisation 😐 wait wait wait…… 😩

@Kelb79 At least you have answers now and they’ll be regularly updating you from now on. Good that they’ve acted promptly to get another donor, so I’m keeping everything crossed that her egg collection goes well today! 🤞🤞We’re all rooting for you lovely xx

@99pctpractice 33 weeks!! Wow that’s flown by, can’t believe it! Do take care of yourself for the last few weeks. I can’t comment properly on DE and related feelings, but what you’ve said makes complete sense and is incredibly poignant. Particularly about grief not being linear, the cliche about in coming in waves is so true. You’ve achieved a much wanted pregnancy and that’s wonderful, but there is a loss of expectation for you in terms of your OE. It’s important to explore and acknowledge those feelings and let yourself grieve when it hits you. ❤️

Hi all - sorry I’ve not posted for a while - I’ll catch up on everyone’s news once I’ve posted my update!

Got myself in a tizzy thinking I wasn’t ovulating. I got 7 days of flashing smileys and then on day 8 I finally got the static smiley on the clearblue digital ovulation tests. So feel a bit better now. I’ve been super anxious about everything. My counsellor also has taken time off from work due to personal issues and I haven’t been allocated a new counsellor yet, so my grief over losing Harriet is coming up again.

I got my colposcopy done - got in off the cancellation list and the consultant took a biopsy but reassured me that it looks like CIN 1. Even if it was CIN 2 they would wait till I had completed my family to treat. As long as I keep up with my smears I will be fine.

@Kelb79 I hope all goes well for you and that the process is smooth.

@99pctpractice wow - you are very nearly there! I can imagine hormones and the reality of everything is probably making you feel a little wobbly at the moment.

I hope all is going well for you @YellowLoafers - the weeks are passing quickly!

I’m at the clinic for transfer!!!! 🥳🥳🥳 I can’t even believe it!! It’s been such a long long time coming!! We ended up with 2 embryos - 4AB and 3AB so I’m pretty good with that. It’s been soooo stressful but il
relaxed and excited now 😁
and check out our embryo….. it’s got a face in it!!!!! 😳😳😳 wtaf?! 🫣🤷🏼‍♀️

Good luck @Kelb79 ❤️

Morning all. Bit deflated. I’m possibly 10DPO. This is cycle 5 but this time no tracking, just going by body etc. Somehow felt different, less pressure on DH.

Did an early test this morning. There was a flash of a faint line briefly, and then gone. So probably nowt. 😞

I genuinely just need to crack on with the donor egg route, just don’t know where to start and don’t understand the steps involved. It’s all in code when I research…I need an idiot guide.

@Kelb79 omd kel I actually thought I was looking at a scan pic until I reread I see his or hers little face I’m so glad things are going good for you so happy for you lovely good luck that everything else goes to plan x

So a little update from me I’m 14 dpo af was supposed to come yesterday still nothing and just getting silly shadows on some cheap tests I brought from eBay and a line pops up within the time frame and then dries to practically nothing so I dunno temps still high so that’s a good thing I suppose I have been getting af type pains on and off the last couple of days but nothing as yet x

@Noodles4Me thanks lovely ❤️ feel free to ask any questions that you have on here - there a few of us that have gone down the donor route and in different countries etc so we can give you lots of info 👍🏼👍🏼

@TraceyTarotReader yes I had to explain to dad that he was not seeing an actual baby yet and that it was just cells 🤣🤣🤣

@Kelb79 good luck, when is the transfer day? Very excited for you. Hope it all goes well. Keep us posted.
@Noodles4Me I found the DE route abroad a lot more simple and stress free than you think. Happy to answer any questions if I can help xx

@October1979 it was this morning! I am officially PUPO. 😁😁😁😁

@Iusedtobedontcall I’m sorry lovely, hope you have a new counsellor assigned soon and get the support you need. Good news that the colposcopy is behind you and you can keep on your journey x

@Kelb79 Yaaaaay! Brilliant news your PUPO! How long are you away for? Rooting so hard for you!

Sending love @Noodles4Me There’s lots of DE knowledge on here to help with any questions x

Hope you’re OK @TraceyTarotReader its not over til AF shows up. Fingers crossed!

@YellowLoafers thank you lovely x

Great news @Kelb79 I have everything crossed for you sending you baby dust xxx

Ladies….am I imagining things? 15 dpo, fmu at 8am but did wee in the night at 5 am ish…

Hi all. 44 here and been TTC for 3 months. We're just going with if it happens it happens. But its hard not to build hopes up. Ovulating now so its the TWW coming up. Last month i missed period and was a week of pink discharge. But all negative tests so far. Keep imagining symptoms like mild nausea. Driving me nuts!

Thanks @October1979 @YellowLoafers and @Kelb79 I will do as much research as I can regarding DE and I will doubtless be picking brains on here. Very kind of you all 😊

@ladybranstonpickle that is a line! Tentative congrats x

@ladybranstonpickle I spy a line too! ❤️

@mommabear64 👋 Welcome! Good luck this month 🤞🤞

Symptom spotting today 🙄🙄🙄 feel sick (i never feel sick) , mild boob aches and tingles but also quite sharp cramps. No idea when AF is due coz last months was weird (no period, only sportting but BFN tests)

And also zits! I never get spots. So just feeling really odd.

@ladybranstonpickle that’s definitely a BFP CONGRATULATIONS 🎉