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TTC After Miscarriage Thread 14 🌈✨💕💙

614 replies

FfoxRedN · 09/02/2023 21:07

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20
SMG1992 · 23/03/2023 13:24

Took another FRER last night and there is not even a hint of a line (a good thing in these circumstances).
I also think I got be ovulating soon going on my ewcm but who knows. I'll just keep tracking with OPKs and BBT.

tulipsunday · 24/03/2023 11:43

That's good @SMG1992 I'm at same point of cycle too. V surprised to get a peak ovulation reading today on cd12 after no peak last month.. my body is certainly keeping me guessing!

SMG1992 · 24/03/2023 11:45

Our bodies defintiley seem to take their time getting back to any kind of normality post mc.
Best of luck for your ovulation!

Dinosaur39 · 24/03/2023 18:54

@Hankthehonk I think that’s definitely a positive taking control of your nutrition in a time we don’t have much control at all.I put on nearly 1/2 stone comfort eating on cookies! And it made me feel a lot better once that weight was lost and I could start getting back on track.

I don’t have any other children. We wasn’t even trying for this pregnancy (clearly not being too careful) but it’s all I can think about now trying to get pregnant again!

@tulipsunday That’s good news about the flashing smiley! I’m going to see how I get on with the cheap sticks first and if no luck might move onto the CB!
Out of interest when did you first ovulate after MC and how long for your first period?
I’m trying to have a more relaxed approach now and wait for my first period before trying again as I feel like it will be some sort of womb cleanse!

@Daniki I haven’t read much on reflexology or acupuncture! What are the benefits you’ve found for these please? I might have to look into them!

@SMG1992 that’s ‘good’ news about your negative test! Hopefully a sign that your body is resetting! Have you hospital offered any advice?

Waitingonarainbow · 24/03/2023 20:05

Hey, I'm just starting cycle 4 post missed miscarriage in Dec, will be our 3rd cycle trying again. Got AF yesterday and whilst I'd say I'm doing better than the previous 2, I'm still finding it really difficult. It's such a huge reminder of what we lost and the start of at least another month ahead without the pregnancy I long for.

I have a DS who will be 3 in July and I would have been due with our second in June before we lost them. I'm so conscious of the fact that the age gap between my DS and a potential sibling is getting bigger and bigger and its just not what I imagined but I can't control it.

Sorry to ramble, It just SUCKS thats all and I know y'all will understand (though of course I wish nobody would have to understand this pain)

Hankthehonk · 24/03/2023 22:21

@Dinosaur39 I can empathise with the need for a baby getting much more intense post MC. We had only been trying for a second baby for 2 months when I fell pregnant, I think if we were still "just trying" I'd feel quite relaxed about when it happens. But being pregnant changed all that.

@Waitingonarainbow I'm so sorry for your loss and for how you're feeling right now after af arriving.
My daughter will be 3 in July too. I just had a mc last week for a baby that was due in October and I was so chuffed at getting our ideal age gap. I'm really struggling with erasing the timeline of that pregnancy and baby from my mind, knowing that even if we manage to conceive again quite quickly (which obviously isn't a given) any new baby would be 2024 now is psychologically tough. So I totally get how you're feeling.

Once we are pregnant, whenever that might be, I'm sure we won't mind the new age gap at all. But while ttc it's hard not to mourn the babies we lost.

Hankthehonk · 24/03/2023 22:45

Oh and I got a negative pregnancy test already today, 8 days after my mc. It made me feel very sad tbh but I guess I'm also relieved that my body has "reset" relatively quickly.

tulipsunday · 25/03/2023 13:38

@Dinosaur39 period came back 24 days after first miscarriage and 19 days after second one. Cycle have been irregular and ovulation a bit hit or miss I think. This cycle seems more 'normal' thankfully

@Hankthehonk @Waitingonarainbow I have the same concerns about age gap. Would have had an exactly three year age gap if my pregnancy had lasted which would have been perfect for us. Trying to think of positives though - I have been able to do lots more with my son this year than I would have of dealing with sickness/pregnancy heaviness and think he will benefit from having mummy to himself for a bit longer. Some of my friends have had 4+ age gaps and it is clear the siblings have a great bond which reassures me.

Hankthehonk · 25/03/2023 14:17

@tulipsunday Yes, there are 5 years between me and my younger sister and we have always been very close. Until this mc I was genuinely quite chilled about age gap but now it feels like one more thing we've lost. My husband is 40 so he's a bit worried about his own age too in terms of how old he will be as the younger child grows up. But his parents were young parents so I think his perception comes from that, I don't see it as an issue. I'm 34 so hopefully I don't need to worry too much about my age as a factor yet.
I like your point about getting more time with our toddlers, my daughter is really keeping me going just now. I've been spending so much time with her being off work due to the mc. The other positive is I've booked another wee family trip this year which we can only afford because I won't be on mat leave now. Trying to look for these silver linings.

tulipsunday · 25/03/2023 18:26

@Hankthehonk the trip sounds a great idea having something to look forward to is so important for keeping you going. Got through a kids party where everyone seemed to be pregnant or have a newborn but survived it!

Waitingonarainbow · 25/03/2023 18:29

@Hankthehonk @tulipsunday thanks for your perspectives, I think you're both totally right. It's hard because you lose the life you imagined with the "perfect" age gap but in reality whatever the age gap ends up being will be totally fine and perfect in it's own way. It's reassuring to hear stories of sibling bonds with a 4+ age gap too.

ChloeN · 25/03/2023 18:47

@tulipsunday I had a few of those last year, and baby showers🙄 must of been asked 20 times when I’d be having one!

TheBirdintheCave · 25/03/2023 18:50

@ChloeN At least that's not a problem now! 😂🤷🏻‍♀️ Hope alls well with you 😊

tulipsunday · 27/03/2023 11:04

@Waitingonarainbow yes you explain it really well. It is that adjustment from the imagined to the reality which is hard.

Managed to dtd 2days and 1 day before ovulation this cycle. Ovulation day sadly didn't work out 😬 so 🤞this will be enough. Good luck to anyone else on 2ww now x

TheBirdintheCave · 27/03/2023 15:37

@tulipsunday You got the most important days covered :)

tulipsunday · 27/03/2023 21:56

Thank you @TheBirdintheCave always find I get stressed at this point as to whether we have given it a good try or not. How are you doing this cycle?

TheBirdintheCave · 27/03/2023 22:43

@tulipsunday Just at CD2 today. Should O again in about 15 days 😊

Daniki · 28/03/2023 08:21

God I’m around my ovulation window now and I just can’t be arsed dtd , the effort 😂🙈

tulipsunday · 28/03/2023 10:26

@Daniki haha yeh I hear you. TTC can definitely be a chore.

Daniki · 28/03/2023 11:34

@tulipsunday absolutely 😂 Il get over it 😂

Hankthehonk · 28/03/2023 11:59

@Waitingonarainbow It's also OK to grieve the loss of that "perfect" age gap, you're absolutely right that we've lost a whole imagined life.
I have just started tracking lh levels yesterday, I told myself I'd wait to have a period after the mc. But I know if I do ovulate this month I'll be desperate to try. Lh levels are low for now anyway...tracking them feels like something to do.
Good luck to those in thr tww, really looking forward to seeing bfps on this thread soon!

tulipsunday · 01/04/2023 13:17

How is everyone doing? It's my due date this wkend for my first miscarriage so feeling a bit down that 9 months later I am still TTC. Keeping busy though and out this evening which will be nice.

7dpo today not letting myself order any FRERs till Monday 😂 have some cheap one step ones has anybody used these? Don't know if worth it if they are dodgy and might give false line etc xx

Daniki · 01/04/2023 17:47

@tulipsunday same boat, my due date is Monday for my first miscarriage and my best friend had a baby yesterday so it's very bittersweet. Am around 6/7 dpo myself and honestly I had to get up to wee about 4 times last night and some amount today hoping it's a good sign 😂 have my sons 2nd bday party tomorrow so that will keep me occupied 😂

curliegirlie · 01/04/2023 18:42

@tulipsunday One Step are fine, just not as sensitive as FRERs, so when I first got a BFP with DD1 the strip was an absolute squinter...

tulipsunday · 02/04/2023 16:12

@curliegirlie thank you

@Daniki how did the party go? We have my son's third birthday party in a coupe of weeks so organising that has been a bit of a good distraction from TTC.

🤞 it is our month! Nothing abnormal yet 'symptoms' wise. Feeling a bit 'guilty for having a couple of wines last night in case it affects implantation but then feel at the same time that I can't restrict myself from everything nice for half of every month how does everyone else feel about this?