TTC after miscarriage Thread 14 🌈✨💕💙

[FfayeN]

New thread 🥰

so sorry to hear this @Mannymoomin i really hope your time comes soon!

I’m feeling a bit confused after my scan. Everything was in the correct place, fetal pole was correct GA. The only thing I’m worried about now is my gestational sac was an odd shape. The midwife said it was irregular but didn’t seem worried about it even though she asked me if I had fibroids or endometriosis as she said it looks like something pushing on it. Anything I’ve googled comes a do to a collapsing sac. I even stopped taking my anti sickness meds to make sure I was still having symptoms and started vomiting again. I have another scan in 2 weeks for more reassurance. Has anyone else had this happen to them?

I had a mc a few months ago and I felt the same way, like iife was pointing its middle finger at me, but three months later I've had to take a step back and let nature take its course. It's cliche and it sucks and I still haven't conceived, but I wish I hadn't agonised and obsessed like I have.

I don't have the words to heal this pain as I'm going through it myself but be kind to yourself and don't give up.

@Luna57 how many weeks are you lovely? I have no experience but I assume it’s a good sign that she thought it was something pushing on it rather than it collapsing! Xx

@ChloeN I’ll be 8 weeks tomorrow. I’m not sure if she just didn’t want to presume the worst and make me stress. Hoping in 2 weeks times it’s corrected itself. I’m the size of a house already, baggy jumpers are a blessing trying to hide this belly. How far along are you now lovely?

@Luna57 I had a look and it seems it can occur in 17% of pregnancies and most of them have no issues.
I think it's not to be confused with a collapsing sac which happens after embryo demise. When I had a scan two weeks (or maybe week?) after embryo demise, the sac was collapsing already at that point BECAUSE the pregnancy wasn't viable and the heartbeat stopped a week or two ago. I don't think that it can just collapse while the foetus/embryo is viable? Forgive me if I'm wrong!

@Luna57 yeah hopefully it was just in a bit of an odd position? I get your stress though I would be the same and set myself off in a panic😢 my bloat is so bad too lol 🙈 they couldn’t date me properly at my scan because it was moving around so much but I’m 12.5-13ish weeks xx

@Mannymoomin I'm really sorry lovely. Are you in pain?

@MrsJGrealish thank you lovely.
No pain, but I think once you’ve had one MC there’s no mistaking them big red clots and the feeling of them passing. I’m in full flow now so I’ll test again in a few days to make sure it’s all gone 😞
AF took 6 weeks to return after the September mc but I was over 7 weeks then, I’m hoping as this one was 5 weeks my cycles will get back to normal quickly.
Really shit to have 2 back to back, but everything is telling me it’s not meant to be as I already have a 17, 14 and 12 year old and me and DH dithered about going for another one

@Happinessandrainbows thank you, she said everything looked fine but just her saying irregular made be worry even more.

@ChloeN oh wow, at least you’d rather hear how active they are for an excuse for not getting an accurate dating. You’ll also get to see them again soon to date them. How have you been feeling? Have you been telling people?

@Mannymoomin same my 3 kids are old, youngest DD is 16 but it still hurts 😢 my worst day was day 2 but I was just over 4 weeks. All the same with no pain you just never know. I was in a lot of pain. I'm taking a cycle off, that last chemical was hateful and I don't think I'm emotionally ready for another try yet. I hope you're ok lovely Xx

@MrsJGrealish this is what I’m thinking, the lack of pain makes me want to cling on to a tiny bit of hope, the bleeding started after a BM and it’s lessened again now, but I’ve passed so many big clots and the bleeding has been so heavy I can’t imagine still being pregnant after that, such a confusing time.
@LuckyMoonstone did you pass any clots with your heamotoma? Good luck for your scan tomorrow, what time is at?

@Mannymoomin fuck the universe, ours are 18, 15 and 14 and my youngest is 2 - she took 4 years and lots of IVF, I also thought the universe was telling me something but she is absolutely fantastic and well worth the heartache and wait. The last 2 miscarriages are my attempts at giving her a sibling close to her age, and I absolutely refuse to listen to the universe in this case too as it was wrong before to deny me her so it's wrong again 🤬

I believe in universe too but not that it's trying to tell people 'don't have kids'. It's maybe trying to teach us some lessons that feel very unfair and very difficult, it's trying to turn us into the strongest versions of ourselves, it's trying to shape us into people we couldn't have been without the experiences etc etc but never saying 'you aren't meant to have kids' ❤️
P.s. still think it's unfair and heartbreaking and cruel.
P.p.s. I won't say 'everything happens for a reason' because it's just one of those cases where you never ever say that. Someone said that to me after m/c and I'm still livid 😂

@Mannymoomin so gutted for you ♥️ I know there’s the usual thing of everything happens for a reason but I honestly think there is no rhyme or reason sometimes - and it’s just shit! It’s ok to be mad and sad, and not make yourself find a reason. Sending lots of love xxx

Thank you @MrsC2018 @Happinessandrainbows and @Babydustmamma. I’ve moped around all day and feeling a bit better tonight. Bleeding has mostly stopped now and I’m just getting some light pink. I’ve reset all my apps to not pregnant and honestly I’m so glad I didn’t tell anyone, and although it’s shit, I’m glad it’s happened earlier rather than later

@Mannymoomin weirdly the apps m can end up being more supportive and kind when you notify them of your loss than the support you get from the MAU 😅♥️ (not nhs bashing, just feel like early loss is really overlooked) hope that your getting the care and support you deserve xxx

@Happinessandrainbows i know quite a few people who say they believe everything happens for a reason and I just straight up say to their face I don’t 😂 they seem quite crestfallen by it 🤣
@Mannymoomin I think I had a few small ones the first day or two of the bleeding, which I normally get at the start of my period when it’s heaviest hence why I thought it was my period! I get what you mean about it being better now rather than later. I literally thought the same to myself earlier today, I thought if this pregnancy isn’t going to work out I’d rather just lose it now than in a few weeks time

Oh and it’s at half 9 tomorrow! I had a dream last night that I went to the scan and everything was fine, not that a dream confirms anything, I’m not psychic 😂 if it was a premonition then I’d also expect to be chased by a giant shape-shifting dog/spider tomorrow whilst trying to make a cheese sandwich 🤔 last night was an odd one even for me 😅

@LuckyMoonstone good luck today 💛. Hope it was partly a premonition for you 😂 got to love pregnancy dreams xx

@LuckyMoonstone good luck today ❤️❤️

@LuckyMoonstone best of luck, glad it's early for you at least 🤍

Thanks everyone, still in the waiting room lol

All fine! Measuring 6+2 which is only a couple of days off what I thought I was

Wonderful news @LuckyMoonstone !!

Wonderful news.