SMEP - anyone giving this a try this month and want to join me?

[Mum2DD89]

New to mumsnet 🙋‍♀️ and I've seen loads of threads where everyone is so lovely and supportive so thought I'd post. This is our 4th cycle ttc #2, 1st cycle giving SMEP a try as I've seen so many success stories. With our first, we got so lucky and ended up pregnant on our first month trying so this waiting is a bit of a shock, although I know out 1st was the exception not the norm! Would love to hear any success stories, or any other ladies that want to compare notes this month x

@NSx great news that your furbaby is home! He's gorgeous. Hope he's back to his normal self in no time. @Mum2DD89, I'm slacking this month too. I'm CD12 but still only getting the blank circle on CB, unusual for me but these things are sent to try us! Hopefully we both get a peak too and can join TWW together!
@NatGee, we're trying for number 2. Have a DD already who is 3. Fell first cycle of trying with her so didn't have any of this last time around! Didn't realise then how lucky that was!

@fsr111 hopefully you get that peak soon. Very lucky falling first time last time.

I'm feeling totally emotional today. It's my 3rd cycle so I know it's still early and can take time. Caught on 4th cycle with my DD with my ex husband so hadn't expected to fall straight away even though I was hopeful. I can't help worrying especially since I'm older. Don't think it helped that at the weekend my OH asked how long it's been since I came off the pill and last night said to me he hadn't really thought about how long it could potentially take and what it might mean if we want another and time isn't on our side (I'm 38 in November) Didn't make me feel particularly great about it. I know it can take time and that I can at least fall pregnant but now can't help worrying about it taking ages. I know it takes two to tango as they say but now I feel this growing pressure and worry about it all and because I'm the older one and I know that has an effect on fertility. I'm trying not to stress too as I know that's not helpful for ttc 🙄

@fsr111 what day do you normally get your flashing smilies? I've been peeing on 4 or 5 LH strips a day since CD14 😂🤦‍♀️ had a big dip in my temp this morning so hoping that's a good sign 🤞

@EdinburghGirl1 bless you, it's so hard not to overthink everything when you're the only one with the burden of it all! Peeing on OPKs, timing BD, keeping track of cycles etc, I feel you! I read somewhere that general worries/thoughts about TTC won't be enough stress to affect anything baby related - hopefully that makes you feel a little better, it's OK to have those feelings ❤️ have you spoken with your OH about your worries? Could you plan something nice for the weekend so you have something to look forward to?

@EdinburghGirl1, sorry you are having a bit of a wobble today. I think TTC is one of the biggest emotional journeys! We're currently on cycle 11 and admittedly the first few cycles were a bit hit and miss, but the past two cycles when af has come or I have had a BFN I've felt absolutely gutted by it (and spent a lot of time crying!). I'm feeling a lot more positive this cycle so hoping that lasts in to the TWW, but the emotions of it all definitely get on top of me sometimes. For me it's having to have your life on hold during this time. I'm a planner and like to know what's going to happen next and it feels like this is the first time everything is out of my hands. Fingers crossed for you that it happens soon, I keep thinking in the scheme of things whilst it might feel like a lifetime right now, as soon as we get a BFP, it'll be completely forgotten how torturous this period has been!

@Mum2DD89, normally around day 11 or 12, so not that much earlier than now. Have just started taking a fertility supplement and wondered if that might be affecting it and making it start a bit late? Maybe just clutching at straws?!

Girls does anyone get really hot the day after ovulation? I feel like I have a bit of a fever/ temp as I’m sitting in work. Face feels 😫 is this normal? I don’t get ovulation pains so I never know when I ovulate but I really tracked it this month 🤔

@fsr111 thank u so much 😘

@Mum2DD89 thank you. Yeah it's all on is women to track it all etc plus take the vitamins, cut out alcohol, reduce caffeine, eat the right foods. We briefly spoke about it this morning but maybe speak to him about it later. We're out tonight actually at a festival show. I have my DD this weekend and got a play date on Sat so probably won't be able to plan much this weekend with him. We do have A holiday booked in 4 weeks though so got that to look forward to and if I don't fall pregnant this cycle my next tww will be in Greece so at least I'll be relaxed next cycle and the tww will fly by.

@fsr111 sounds like you've been through a tough journey. Glad you're feeling positive this cycle. I'm a planner too and don't like the whole not knowing etc and having the control totally out your hands. You're absolutely right it will all be forgotten about. I know I need to put it into perspective like you say. A few months is nothing. I just want to give my OH a child so badly. Maybe the supplements are delaying ovulation a bit for you?

@NSx I suppose since your bbt spikes after implantation you would feel warmer?

@EdinburghGirl1 yea u might be right 😝 I’ll check my temp tomorrow and see what it’s like

I did SMEP for my baby who's six months old now. However modified SMEP like @Tubbytele because the SMEP the month before hadn't worked. Was exhausting! That was my 5th cycle after a miscarriage. I figure the more sperm the more chances also 😅

I saw a few people are wobbling because of age. I don't know if it helps to say I had my first one at 37. Im 38 this year and going for the second. My antenatal group of 10 couples are all mid-30s to mid 40s with their first.

I'm breastfeeding still currently and only just got my period back. Should hopefully be ovulating in a couple of days, and started SMEP again this month. So was lovely to read that @Tubbytele got pregnant whilst feeding still also

@A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 that's really nice to hear so thank you for sharing. I know some people that had babies in their late 30's and 40's so need to keep reminding myself of that and it's only cycle 3. Time goes so slowly when ttc though doesn't it.

One of my best friends had her second in March and she fell when still bf her first

Thanks @A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 wishing the best for your SMEP this month and hope you get your bfp soon

Ladies I have another question-

I DTD cd8,10,12,13,14 and I think I ovulated cd14… OH was not up for it cd15 as he was too tired after all the shenanigans with my cat😅
which is the day after ovulation, do you think that’s ok 😂😅 I’m stressing out but the logical person in me says if I ovulated cd14 there should have been plenty of swimmers in there waiting and that the egg is normally fertilised as it’s released by sperm waiting and not typically with sperm that just reach there after the egg has been released hours later😂

why am I doing this to myself - ttc has made me lose the plot 🤡

hope ur all ok on this rainy day ☔️

@NSx it definitely does make you lose the plot a little doesn't it. I'm inclined to say that it doesn't really matter so much as it's the days before ovulation that matter most Just like you say. I'm now 1dpo and not sure if we will tonight as it has been 4 days in a row. If it happens, it happens but im not going to put pressure on myself for tonight. I think we have done the most important dates. Now it's out of our hand. Oh gotta love the tww

@NSx, I'd agree too, that sounds like plenty of DTD before ovulation to give you the best possible chance. It's hard when you know it's technically time but OH isn't in the mood. So inconsiderate of them - haha! Got the flashing smile today (finally, was starting to panic!), so fingers crossed for a static soon enough!

@NSx I wouldn't get too down about it, you hit O-2, O-1 and O which is great! Will you try tonight to do the 'one for luck'?

@fsr111 yay fab news, hopefully your static won't be too far away. My LH test was a little darker this morning and I've had EWCM today and yesterday so hoping not too far away for me either. We DTD last night as CD16 but it was tough going as hubby nearly didn't finish 🤦‍♀️ if I get my positive OPK tonight I think he might cry at the thought of 3 more nights in a row 😂 oh the joys of TTC sex 🙄 half of me can't wait to get in to the TWW so we can just enjoy each other again, I think we are both feeling the pressure a little as I've usually ovulated by now! Why oh why did we start BD on CD8 😭

@Tubbytele @A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 thank you so much for the positive stories! It's really nice to hear SMEP worked, makes all the effort seem worth it 🤞congratulations on your little ones!

@fsr111 that's great you got your flashing smiley. Hopefully static will appear soon.

@Mum2DD89 sounds like your body is gearing up for it. Oh no your poor hubby. Maybe you'll be able to have a day off today. Yeah the pressure to make sure it happens isn't quite as fun is it. It's nicer to BD when you feel like it

@EdinburghGirl1 yes it goes so slowly, and also so quickly! It's a weird one for me, all of the planning and activity in the middle, then an anxious two weeks waiting around with time crawling.....

@Tubbytele thank you, wishing you a healthy and happy pregnancy! Actually I did want to ask, did your cycles come back okay as normal and how old was your little one when you got pregnant again? Mine is six months so still feeding a lot- wondering if I'm setting myself up for failure starting now.

@NSx sounds to me like you have done plenty this month.

@Mum2DD89 it gets to be a real chore sometimes doesnt it, forcing it even if tired, not in the mood, busy etc.

@A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 thank you so much! Unfortunately I couldn't exclusively bf as I'd had quite a difficult birth so took a while for my milk to come through, did combination feeding. Because of that, periods came back within a couple of months but they were really irregular. We planned to try for 2nd baby before DS turns 2 at the end of this Sept and I got my bfp only about 2 weeks ago, so he's 22m. I don't think you're setting yourself up for failure at all as so many factors affect pregnancy. In my case I hit 35 this year and also have endometriosis so we thought it might take long to ttc, hence why we went a bit crazy with the SMEP plan lol The April due thread that im on have quite a women bf and are pregnant so I hope that reassures you. Are you using any opk to check if you're ovulating?

Morning all - hope you're all keeping well ❤️ DPO 6/7 today. No obvious symptoms. TWW sucks. I feel like I'm sat on my hands (no testing, I don't have any in the house). For the first time ever, I want to fast forward the weekend to Sunday so I can just test and be done with it.

😑

@EdinburghGirl1 yea it does doesn’t it, makes you absolute bat shit crazy - excuse my language 😂😂😂 have u been temping ? my bbt was 36.46 day of ovulation then 37.6 yesterday and today went to 36.66 at 2dpo. I don’t know why but I haven’t felt great today and yesterday I don’t feel ill I just feel a bit warmer it’s weird.

@Mum2DD89 i think because we missed yesterday and I’m flapping about it even tho I think we did a lot on the lead upto ovulation and inc ovulation I will see if he’s up for it tonight 😂😂😂

@A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 yea a think ur right too, everywhere I read they say it’s better to have the sperm waiting for the egg to release to fertilise so fingers crossed 🤞 how u getting on?

@fsr111 i got 3 flashing smilers then 4th day static 😃 so I hope urs isn’t far away.
i know how dare he not want to DTD, 😂 - tbh it’s been a stressful week we’ve both been working long days & then I had the stress of the cat in the hospital so we’ve both been upto high doe. ill see if he wants to go tonight to finish off SMEP 😃

@dobby13 I know what you mean, wishing the time away so you can test and find out. Hopefully the next days go quickly.

@NSx no I haven't been temping. I don't think it would work for me as half the time my daughter wakes me up to go downstairs and OH is usually still asleep so not that easy to take it when I get up. I use OPK and have ovulation pains so they give me what I need to know when I will or have ovulated. If your OH is up for it tonight just go for it but if not I don't think it matters.

@EdinburghGirl1 i think I remember you saying this actually that it would be hard for u to temp all the time due to your daughter etc .. it’s hard without that 😂😂😂
yea I will wait and see what he says tonight its not a must anyways 💜
when will u test ? Will u test before AF or wait til she’s due?

@NSx I will probably test early. I tested at 10dpo last month and although I was disappointed I felt like I could just move on and wait for AF rather than the not knowing and constant wondering etc. what about you?