Secondary Infertility

[Hoping43]

Hi Everyone

Thought I would set up a thread for those of us going through secondary infertility and it would be great if anyone wants to join me.

a bit about me…. We have been TTC our third baby for 14 months now and been through all relevant fertility testing and so far it’s unexplained. We are trying naturally until the autumn before discussing other options such as IVF

Hello Hoping43,

You’re not alone. I’ve just had my anniversary of TTC. And today it was confirmed I have not been successful again. I’m 39 and have a 2 year old who is almost 3, I desperately wanted another baby before my 2 year old turned 3 and I’m not even pregnant.

I’ve had some tests and aside from telling me I’m older and I have a blocked left tube (I paid privately) there is nothing else other than expensive ivf.

Wishing us both better news soon.

x

Hi 👋 I've been trying for number 2 for around 18 months. I've had 3 Miscarriages now. It could be age related or thyroid related. I feel so frustrated and sad. We conceived son first month trying so was not expecting such a difficult journey for number two. I'm 41 now so time is definitely ticking 😔

@bluebird2022 sorry to hear that. Is that your 12th month? Do you think you’ll go down the IVF route? We have been advised that it can take up to 2 years and to discuss with the hospital again after 18 months. I feel so heartbroken and like this hardly happens to anyone, why is it happening to me 💔.

not sure where I stand on IVF. I feel there’s a lot of research which suggests that given time most people get there naturally with unexplained infertility but similarly I want to do all I can x

@ladybuggoldfinch I am looking at my finances and think I will go down IVF. I was hoping I would not need to but as I’ve got one blocked tube it means I only in theory ovulate every two weeks or 6 times in 12 cycles. I’m getting anxious as I’ve been trying since I was 38, I know that’s old but still thought I had not left it that late. I was also told my reserves were on the lower side which again has me worried as to how long I can keep trying ….

Its so difficult to know what to do and I know IVF isn’t guaranteed but at least I feel like I am giving myself the best chance. I only wanted one more as I don’t think I can handle more than two. I also wanted a smaller age difference and at this rate there will be a 4+ year age difference 😥

I know how you feel as someone at my work is 41 and pregnant and I know she said it took ages but equally I thought I would be first as I’m 3 years younger! I think secondary infertility is more common but most people assume you don’t what another one not that you do but are struggling.

I’m sorry to hear you’ve had miscarriages, I can only imagine how heartbreaking that is given how much you want this.

Wishing you lots of luck and hope you don’t have to wait too long.

x

Hi

Trying for our second for over a year, had fertility testing after 6 months as I'm 36 soon to be 37 years old.

Was told I had low ovarian reserve (0.8) high FSH low AMH husband however has better .. much better than average sperm count!

We've stopped trying to be honest! I have hormonal epilepsy (have been told it's not connected ) but we're happy with just DD who's 3 soon, but if another were to come along we'd be happy. I'm currently taking folic acid & Coq10, but not testing as of yet, ovulation test etc as apparently I don't every cycle anyway!

Also just to add, we aren't eligible for IVF and have been told our only option is donor eggs which We don't really want.

@ffiffi123 sorry to hear that. Did you have any problems conceiving your first? It’s so hard isn’t it and crazy how things seem to change in a short space of time. May I ask what your FSH was?

also, how have you come to terms with it? I feel so bitter and angry. We started TTC our third when I was 34 and I feel like we’ve left it too late and I feel so angry and upset that most other 34/35 year olds wouldn’t have these issues.

we haven’t been told it’s too late. My FSH is 9.6 and AMH 18.6 but it’s not happening, we will move onto cycle 15 next week. We had no issues conceiving our other children xx

Welcome @@ladybuggoldfinch have you had any testing done? Xx

No problem although it did take 6/7 months of planning and opks, fertility lube, vitamins etc, which I've not bothered with as much this time.

Husband isn't bothered if we have another and is quite happy with having DD, sometimes I think we couldn't cope anyway with two (she's quite high spirited ) and also my age & my health (epilepsy & migraines)

I cope with it by suppressing it ... but I do that with traumatic events, I'm quite a 'get on with it' type of person. Which I've been told I need counselling for a few things including this. I was the same when my father passed away suddenly & the traumatic birth of my daughter.

My FSH was at one point 11, in another cycle as high as 19 I think but the imbalance of hormones from epilepsy doesn't help

I just tend to think 'well it only takes one egg!' And carry on trying

Again, so sorry to drip feed!

I also have a uterine polyp! Very small but I believe once it's removed it may help?!

I'm hoping it'll still be removed now we've had our results and it'll not be a case of 'they don't need it as they're infertile' sort of thing.

Haven't heard anything yet but apparently it may take up until Christmas

Hi OP, just wanted to say that im in a very similar position. TTC our 3rd for the past 18mnths and i am so upset that its not happening.

OH sperm analysis was better than average so i feel its my fault.

Age gap between 2nd and 3rd is now a year over what I had hoped for and im so sad about it.

We're in the TWW as of now for month 19.

im 38.

wishing you all the best

Hi, hope it's ok to join. I'm 39 with a soon to be 3 year old, we've now been TTC our 2nd for over 18 months. We've both had initial tests done which came back fine but that was about 7 months ago now. I'm going to be having my first appointment with our local fertility clinic soon, after being referred by my GP, but it's only a phone appointment so I'm not too sure what to expect from it.

I'm really trying to stay positive about it all and remind myself that I'm lucky to have a child already but I have to admit it's getting harder and harder and at the moment I am struggling with it all. So many local mums with similar aged children are now having their second babies and I'm so sad that it hasn't happened for us yet.

@ffiffi123 waiting lists for everything seem to be really long because of covid. I hope they will still sort it for you, I’m sure they will!

@mynewname25 thank you and welcome to the thread. Did you have any problems conceiving your first two and have you considered any fertility treatment?

I am with you on feeling it’s my fault. The consultant said female age is the biggest determinant and egg quality is the only thing they can’t test. I took that as saying they can’t find anything wrong but because I’m 35 now it’s probably my fault x

@Bagpuss16 hi and welcome to the thread. I think they’ll take lots of history from you and then book you in for further blood tests and a follicle count depending on what you’ve had already. Did you have any issues conceiving your first? Xx

@Hoping43

1st DC conceived 3rd month but ended in MC

2nd DC was conceived on 9th or 10th cycle - healthy baby

3rd DC 5th cycle - healthy baby

4th DC 9th cycle - mc

currently on cycle 10 since last MC.

OH had sperm analysis in feb this year and if no joy this month im going to look into tests for me.

currently in tww approx 5dpo so fingers crossed.

how are you doing?

hi all..for those of you who have had fertility testing..where did you have it done if you don't mind me asking? been ttc #2 since Aug 2021..had a mmc in Dec with smm..x

Hi all, we've just passed our 48th unsuccessful cycle. 4 years trying for dc2, we have a 6 year old ds. I've resigned myself to not having any more but still I hope every month will be our month..... I have PCOS but appear to ovulate every month, tubes clear, no issues with Dh. It's just not happening.

Hey everyone. How is everyone doing? We are on cycle 15 and feeling anxious. I think it’s that mid cycle thing after ovulation when you get the dreaded feeling that it’s not happened again. We are looking to go private and try ovulation induction before IVF. Hoping and praying by some miracle it’ll work for us.

@littlesnowdropfairy have you had all the tests? How old are you if you don’t mind me asking? X

Hi all - I'm a bit further down the line as after 4 years of secondary infertility and multiple miscarriages ended up losing both tubes to ectopics. I did have a successful IVF round on the 5th go and had my rainbow but mulling over one final go

@Justkeepswimming20 I had a fertility MOT done by an IVF Clinic as well as saw an NHS recurrent miscarriage clinic (but found them useless)

@couldishouldigoforit your story sounds fairly similar to mine:( 4.5 years trying for second baby, 3 miscarriages during that time including one miscarriage at 11 weeks after sucesful first round of IVF. Also my first ever pregnancy was ectopic and as a result I only have one tube. All pretty sad and grim for us on TTC field but I do have my beatiful 6 year old daughter:)
Husband and I have been diagnosed with unexplained infertiliry, as all tests are normal.
I have convinced my consultant to try Fermara for ovulation induction although I am ovulating regularly it can happen quite late in the cycle ocasionaly day 21 or later, but thay has only started happening in the last few months. I guess this is a result of me getting older-38.5 years, I feel like this is my last year and then I will probably give up...

@Hoping43 I'm 38. I've had all the tests and everything looks good...no issues whatsoever. It's very frustrating.

@littlesnowdropfairy I also have 6 year old and been trying for 4.5 years to concieve our second
❤️

@Doremifasol 💖 and the gap is getting bigger by the day. Have you had tests?

@Doremifasol i am also going to try letrozole. What has your consultant said to you about it? I’ve just had the talk that I am ovulating so I don’t need it. My cycles are 28-34 days and I ovulate between 16-21. Nobody has actually proved I ovulate. I had one positive day 21 progesterone done but they said my cycles are classed as regular therefore I likely ovulate x