3catstoo - Over here!!!

[Ready]

Your very own thread

Hi Mibbles,

You are not butting in at all.

I had a laparoscopy to determine the cause of the spotting and pain that I was getting.

I'm sure the spotting was down to the slightly thick lining of the womb. It isn't endometriosis as the consultant thought.
I had other symptoms which were put down to other things.

It is worth seeing your GP about it though as there could be a number of reasons. He/she should refer you to a gyny.

Let me know what you do.

Good luck. Do you get any other symptoms?

Hi City and Ready,

Fab news about Seaside and MrsMc. Any details?

Hope you both have a fab weekend.

I'm building upto AF. Had a migraine today, first for a month. More spots too. The antibiotics finally cleared the spots on my jawline but then more appeared on my chheks and chin.

Still not really had a chance to talk to DH. He is so tired all the time.
Probably won't talk tonight as he will be late and I have a migraine. He will probably complain about the state of the kitchen and that I have no idea what's for his supper.

Still 'texting' but not gone any further. Still excited by it and not sure what I want. Not really a good place to be at the moment. I know I don't want to ruin my marriage over a silly fling (mainly because I don't want to hurt DH and because of the children).

Still want no 4 bizarrly (sp?). I think this whole thing is possibly because of DH's attitude towards having another baby and towards me.
His female collegues at work get more attention than me.

Sorry that turned into another rant.
I don't feel down though. I feel quite good, just confused, excited, aprehensive, naughty, guilty, the list goes on.

Anyway, big hugs to you both.

thank you so much 3catstoo I'm trying vit B6 this cycle then off to the docs if no improvement. I appreciate you taking the time to respond

Hi 3catsoo I hope it works out Things sound confusing and tough at the moment.. not sure I am going to be much help with that but fingers crossed you are happier soon.

Good luck Mibbles

Hi Ready, Big hugs. Was dh watching the footie this weekend or out there! Lots of big games and results to keep my dh very happy.

I am imaging you all send me hugs as today is a low day..

I went to see my grandma in hospital today who is very weak and I am off to bed all nervous as I am having 4 moles removed under local anesthetic tomorrow and although it doesn't sound like much I am really worried about it Still it's one way to get time off work

Hi City, Good luck with the op.

Why are you having a low day?

Lots of hugs for you.

thanks 3catstoo it went ok

I am just worried it could affect the baby, but they have re-assured us it won't.

The damn local anaesthetic is waring off so its quite sore now hey ho

How are you?

Sorry for not being online for a bit girls, been busy. Had friends visiting for the weekend. Great fun, and am now still catching up with sleep I had a fair few glasses of vino, and was totally relaxed, which is just what I needed after the disappointment of starting another cycle. Onwards and upwards!

3cats, really sounds like you are going through the mill at the moment. Sending big hugs. I can?t really offer any advice, but I hope that you are ok? And always feel free to rant here, if it helps.

City, I am sorry to hear that your grandma is weak and in hospital I hope she is better soon. I am also sorry that you have had to undergo surgery during your pregnancy. Of course it is natural to worry about it, but they would not perform it if they were in doubt ? the claim culture has made sure of that. So, do try to relax. Are they doing biopsies on the moles? Hope you are feeling ok?

DH was only watching at the weekend, slight muscle strain, which is annoying as he had found the back of the net in recent weeks, fingers crossed for a swift recovery.

Great news about XavierMcJnr? is there a name yet for SeasideJnr? Hope that mum?s are both well? send them my best.

Hi Ready, glad you got to relax You sound positive and fingers crossed this is the month.
Sorry to hear dh is injured I hope he's ok. Got any fun plans for this month?

Hi 3catstoo how's things?

As for me well a bit sore with 4 mole holes, but hopefully that will go. They are biopsying them fingers crossed on that. I should be braver about my grandma as she has dementia and is a good age, but its hard to watch the deterioration. On top of everything else a friend announced she was infectious with mumps last time we saw her. Me and dh have had it but an added worry nonetheless.

Seaside's baby is called Cassius I'll send them your best They're a busy bunch on there its hard to keep up!

See you all soon

Cassius! Lovely! Great names on that there thread? in fact, all the names over there have been lovely, and not the norm either. What a cool bunch of gals Any thoughts on names yourself yet City??
DH is almost there, back running, so possibly have a late fitness test for Saturday?s game. We shall see. Fingers crossed. Lots going on this month, mainly consisting of eating out for people?s birthdays ? oh and then I turn 29 very soon and hope to hear about the job soon too? What about you?
Fingers crossed about the biopsies, when will you hear? I should think something of that nature is done fairly quickly?

How are you doing 3cats? Have you had any more migraines? I know you had your first one of the month the other day. Have you been keeping a food diary to see if there is a trigger?

Hi girls.

Sounds like you had a fab weekend Ready .

City, sorry to hear about your grandma. Fingers crossed for you re the biopsy.

I'm fine. AF is late but looming. No more migraines strangely. I usually get more than one around AF time.

Don't laugh now but I had my first bikini wax today. Boy am I red down there. Just a standard wax nothing fancy. Please tell me that this redness will go away?

I thought it would be a good idea as I'm swimming lots and am always concerned about showing more than i'd like when I get out of the pool. Now I'll have a lovely red rash to show off instead .

Lovely names that Mrsmc and Seaside have chosen. Hope they are both well and enjoying motherhood .

Do you have dark hair 3cats? I do, and I tend to get more ingrown hairs as a result, the darker the hair the thicker it is I think - so definitely recommend LOTS of exfoliation, daily would not be overdoing it in my opinion to stop offending ingrowers. As for the redness, which is really what you wanted to know... it usually goes down by the next day, but did they say anything about swimming within a certain time? Never thought about the chlorine y'see? and wondered. Redness will go, promise

Thanks Ready. Yes I have almost black hair, very thick (on my head that is).
The redness has gone down a bit today but I can see a tiny red dot where every hair was .
Exfoliate down there? I'm new to all this.
She told me to use sudocream. I have to go out and get some. Would evening primrose oil help or is that a daft question?

No mention of swimming and I'm meant to be going tonight .

AF arrived this morning. To be honest I'm a bit relieved in light of recent events. Still want number 4 but think I need to get my life in order.

Had a chat to DH last night. He thinks everything is fine between us. He suggested buying me a 'rampant rabbit' to bridge the gap between his ever decreasing libido and my increasing libido.

I might take him up on it to see his reaction.

He thought we had done quite well to get through 13 years before reaching this point.

I dread to think what he'll be like when he's in his 50's. He's 38 now and I'm 33. Never thought I would be having these sort of conversations at this age and worrying about DHs lack of interest. He just can't see the problem.

Do I sound like a sex mad deprived woman? (I feel that way actually - don't know what's happened to me) .

I think after having 3 children and breastfeeding each one for 18 months my body has only just recovered. Well that's my explanation anyway? Maybe it's my body craving for another baby .

Is this normal what I am going through, do you think?

3cats, pmsl, yes, I was referring to your head hair - since you have dark hair I would reiterate what I said about exfoliation - prevention is better than cure. Ingrown hairs are nasty I use an exfoliating sponge (a regular one with a rough side) and gently rub across the area in a circular motion, you don't have to get the exfoliating lotions if you don't want. The little red dots are just the skin freaking out, it will calm down Don't know about primrose oil benefits, but would say that any "soothing" oil should help.
Hope the chlorine didn't give you a reaction?

I am pleased that you had a talk to your dh - definitely good to open the lines of communication I am sure that I have read (probably Cosmo, or something, so not necessarily scientifically proven ) that men's libido decreases with age, and women's increases - which seems rather odd for evolutionary purposes ... but it would certainly make sense with your situation

You don't sound sex mad at all. Sex is a crucial part of a relationship, imo, but if it is natural for the woman to start wanting more, but the man to start wanting less, somewhere in there has to come compromise.
I would also dare to venture that a stressful job can certainly have an effect on anyone's libido (man or woman).
A declining libido shouldn't translate that he has a lack of interest. Perhaps he is happy with quality over quantity
Is it possible that your strong sexual need is a way seeking reassurance of your relationship as a whole, more than just that of purely physical need? I may be way off here - apologies if I am - but when you were first married you may have had plenty of action, and is it possible that in your mind the declining amount is translating somehow as declining feeling?? I guess you saying his "lack of interest" made me think that it might be more than just a physical thing?? Sorry again if I have misinterpreted you.

talk with... not... talk to - that was all wrong

I didn't go swimming in the end, my friend was poorly and I didn't brave it on my own.

Thanks for the exfoliating tip though, I will invest in a sponge when I'm next in Boots.

I wish it was a case of quality over quantity . He's satisfied but I'm not. It's all a bit one sided suddenly.
He's happy to receive, put it that way, then rolls over and falls asleep. It only happens on Fridays and Saturdays .

I think you are right, his work related stress and heaps of travelling are having a huge effect. Although he doesn't see that because he thinks everything is hunky dory!

TMI alert..........

He thinks it's fine for me to perform oral sex and for him to fall asleep straight away. I make the first and last move and still end up being frustrated.

A friend in RL has suggested that maybe he is having an affair. It's possible but I don't think he is. It would probably make it easier in a bizarre way.

He was mortified when I said I would like to take him up on his idea of buying me a vibrator. He doesn't think I need one he was joking apparently when he suggested it.

Sorry I do go on. We've never hit a rough patch like this in our 13 years together.

He's out drinking tonight so I'll see if he's amorous when he gets back drunk (never works though as his mind and body have different ideas ).

Anyway, it's the weekend, something to be thankful for.
Have a good one.

Thanks so much for your support Ready, it really does help to chat to someone about it.

Sorry, but that is not fair. Satisfying him and then he falls asleep - anybody would get frustrated with that. Certainly explains why he doesn't think there is a problem, he's getting plenty - perhaps you need to suggest he goes down first
He clearly has a stressful job, and I definitely think that will have an effect on him, but to the point where he gets his kicks and then rolls over, no no no no!
The only thing I can suggest (and it might take a lot of willpower) is to stop instigating things, and see what happens. Of course you run the risk of getting nothing at all - which I know isn't what you want - but if he knows it is "on tap" and doesn't have to work for it, then he's probably making the most of it. ??

You don't go on at all - if it is worrying you then why shouldn't you get it off your chest? Goodness knows I go on enough about still not being able to conceive a baby after all these months

Oh, and still haven't heard about the job... is that bad news do you think?

Sorry you haven't heard about the job Ready. I wouldn't think of it as a bad thing. Did they say they would let you know either way?
Sometimes it takes a while and it also depends how many candidates they had and how quickly they were all seen.

I'm glad you think DH is wrong to be on the receiving end and not consider me at all.

I might have to do as you say and stop initiating. AF at the moment so it's easy for me to withold. Although thta's when he usually wakes up in the morning (if it's a weekend) and asks for my helping hand !!!
I won't oblige if he does this time though.

Enjoy the rest of the weekend.

Good for you 3cats... deny the helping hand I definitely think he should be more considerate of your needs, rather than just his own.
Sorry that it is AF, but you kinda knew because of the antibiotics didn't you that the chance would be slim? Fingers crossed for you this month, if you will be trying that is
Weekend was good here - still no snow though

No snow here either, although they keep promising!

Probably won't be trying this month. I need a marriage that's working before I think about ttc again. The feeling of wanting another hasn't gone away though despite the turbulance!

DH had no interest at the weekend. He was asleep at 9 last night.

It was feb last year that it snowed here. The school was closed and the children got to make snowmen all day. It was fab. Hopefully they will get to do it again this year.

Crikey! Your dh must be working too hard! In bed by nine.
I am sorry that the urge for another has not gone away... perhaps I should re-phrase that. I am no sorry, because there is nothing wrong with wanting another... I just mean that with everything that you are going through, it must be tremendously difficult to deal with the added factor of wanting another baby.

Hope you are ok? How's the wax-job? The bumps all gone?

Got a + the last two days on OPKs (well, I think they are +, as dark as the control, but not quite as thick - see what tomorrow brings to confirm or not) but as soon as dh gets in, I am going to pounce It has to happen for us soon... doesn't it?

I used to love it as a child when it snowed and we would listen to the radio in the mornings to find out if the school was closed

hi sneaks in...

I hope you are both doing ok.

I am bumbling along... bumble bumble

Have just about recovered from my mole removal now just waiting for the results

Well off to bed to tame the snoring monster!

If you fancy some laughs go and see Spamalot really funny!

Hope the results come back quickly for your City, must be worrying.

3cats, hope you are ok?

I got offered the job, subject to the usual security clearance and health checks, but been through those before and come out the other side, so feeling chuffed

Huge Congrats Ready. Well done you .

Hope the pouncing works .

Hi City, good luck with those results.

I'm fine. No change. Won't go on about it.

Oh no if you need to say more 3cats, feel free. A problem shared and that? Don't worry about going on, you really aren't - I would tell you if you were!!

Have been told that the pouncing must wait until England have finished playing. Fine with me... glass of grenache, ah thankyou

Congratulations Ready fingers crossed with the formalities Really pleased for you and you can have wine and rampant nookie to celebrate!

Hey 3catstoo keep us updated I hope things are getting better

Half way to the weekend