🎵 Anyone for a spot of Sunday Evening Xylophone? 🌈 TTC Bus 52 🚌

[polkadotpixie]

Soooo....@Minster2012 is letting the lunatics take over the asylum as she's handing over the driving seat to the passengers and having a well deserved rest after driving us around since June 2020!

I'm sure she'll still be around and you can follow her on Instagram (Minstermusings) where a lot of passengers and ex-passengers have their own TTC or normal accounts too (just be careful not to out anyone on their non-TTC accounts!)

We have a fabulous history of BFPs on this thread since @Minster2012 took over and we need to keep it up...no slacking!

Anything goes and NOTHING is TMI on this bus! Whether you're doing it the old fashioned way or with some help from science, we're all waiting for those 2 pink lines and are here to support each other and try to stay (somewhat) sane along the way

June 2020 24 BFPs
July 11 BFPs
August 18 BFPs
Sep 4 BFPs
Oct 7 BFPs
Nov 7 BFPs
Dec 14 BFPs
Jan 2021 7 BFPs
February 8 BFPs
March 5 BFPs
April 5 BFPs
May 4 BFPs
June 5 BFPs
July 1 BFP
Aug 2 BFPs
Sept 5 BFPs
October 3 BFPs
November 4 BFPs
December 5 BFPs

Still on for the ride are our fabulous passengers:

@Franklydear
@polkadotpixie
@dmb91
@pennysays
@Sausage1990
@MrsBiddy
@manifestingbaby
@chiatta
@Hann91
@LoveQ
@BellatrixK
@JuniperAndTonic
@user1019273703

IVF/IUI/ICSI/Clomid passengers as well as TTC on the side!
@somatronic
@Dollybird89
@pennysays
@InkyPaper

Already promoted to the Bumps list but still hopping on the bus to keep us company:

@clairey844
@blackcurrantqueen
@lucyrp
@Catherinettc
@Ltay2
@BlondePotter
@Clairey844
@Gem176
@kirky658
@justanothercyster
@2020mission
@Hopeful110
@becarefuloutthere
@crazydoglady123
@Haiyaa
@lexber
@whatwonder
@bez91
@DKDK123
@minster2012
@feliznavidad2
@clolo
@gcat16
@paintfairy
@Bea14
@vil10
@juno231
@sunbird24
@kaylsd
@larrythelizard

Apologies to anyone missed...40 pages is a lot!

New passengers always welcome and an embarrassing story buys you a cheap ticket...Beep Beeeeeep!

@Juno231 a girl! Lovely news.

I always manage to pee on my hands. It reminds me of being 18 years old in hospital with an appendix about to burst (it didn't, thankfully) and in absolutely horrendous pain whilst trying to piss into a narrow test tube because the hospital wouldn't do x rays (or whatever the test was I don't remember) without a negative pregnancy test. Telling them I was a virgin didn't convince them. I was in such a bad way I just wee'd everywhere, hoping a tiny amount would make its way into the ridiculously narrow tube and handed it over. I remember trying to clean up the loo whilst trying not to pass out. Then I fainted and they sent me for emergency surgery, but what an ordeal!

@Juno231 Congratulations on a baby girl! 💗

@lakejupiter I sometimes wee on my fingers when aiming for the pot too, you're definitely not alone! I agree with the perk of BBT is the gentle letdown, I can normally tell by 9/10dpo that I'm not pregnant so I rarely test

I'm on CD2 today. I've contacted a fertility clinic though so feel like I'm being productive at least. I'm going to request a HyCoSy for sure as I got pregnant with DS after a HSG so hopefully it will help again. Dreading finding out my current AMH though as it was only 7.5 just over 3 years ago so it's probably nearly non-existent now 😩

Has anyone ever tried Ovusense Core? I find temping makes me really anxious and disturbs my sleep and thought it might take the stress of waking up too early away. It's not cheap though 🤔

I'm thinking of giving Soy Isoflavones a go this cycle. I did them 3 times when TTC DS and got pregnant with him the 3rd time round so figure it's worth a shot again this cycle whilst waiting for the fertility clinic to process things and get me booked in

@Juno231 aw lovely news 😊

@polkadotpixie I'm sorry about it being a new cycle but well done on getting the ball rolling on an HSG - is that something you would consider @Manifestingbaby ?

Guys, also clearing my name. I’m peeing into a tiny little Tupperware type pot (I may have to show a picture because I’m not explaining very well!). But I still end up splashing it. I’m really, really clumsy though @lakejupiter I’m glad you’ve said the same, vindicates me!

Definitely understand about temping. My RHR does the same- day or two before AF it starts to drop, and it feels better than a surprise AF.

Massive congratulations @Juno231! That’s amazing news! How far along are you?

@polkadotpixie really sorry about the new cycle, but it sounds like you’re being really proactive. Definitely good things to try if they seemed to work last time?

@lakejupiter @BellatrixK wide Tupperware container alllllll the way 😂

@Somatronic a test tube??? A fricking test tube??? That's cruelty

@polkadotpixie sorry for the new cycle & totally understand your concerns on the fertility results but it's a positive step forwards so focus on that. My AMH was 2.1 back in 2017 when we did the ivf & yet we got more eggs & embryos than they expected, and a child 🥰so don't lose hope

@lakejupiter I def agree on the easy let down with the bbt, HOWEVER will repeat that when I got my BFP my chart was very similar to yours & temp was nosediving. That's a really interesting point on you & your coparent needing something in place to cover eventualities. Can I be cheeky and ask if you can draw up something legally binding? The only reason I ask is that our DS was actually carried by my friend in a surrogacy arrangement & due to the complicated & very outdated British surrogacy laws although we had a written agreement in place with her & her hubby it couldn't be legally binding in the UK. I know it must be different as you will both be named on the birth certificate (I assume) so will automatically have more rights than we did for instance (despite being the genetic parents in the uk the surrogate & their husband if they are married are legally put as mother & father on the BC until you get a parental order which replaces it) but can you do a legally binding agreement? It's fab if you can I'm just interested having done an unusual journey to our child ourselves

@Juno231 you said you found out you are having a girl. Lovely news. Congratulations.

@Minster2012 I had a scroll back and you're right, your chart does look very similar to mine 👀 I haven't had that total nosedive some people seem to get yet - I have the same slow downward curve as you. It's good to know that can happen with a BFP - charts I've seen online have these crazy continuously rising temperatures and a really pronounced shift between the two halves of the cycle whereas mine seem a lot more up and down.

I feel very peculiar today. Burt into tears a couple of times this morning, snapped at someone over email then had to apologise, and just got back from a work lunch where I had to retreat to the loo halfway through as thought I was going to either throw up or pass out -- was suddenly boiling hot and lightheaded. Am usually fairly robust so not sure if this is just an unusually brutal hormonal thing or if it's the inseminations plus TWW feelings plus booster jab a few weeks ago playing havoc with my bod.

We don't have anything legally binding and it's really surprisingly hard to figure out if we need it or even are able to do it. I've heard via gay parenting websites that surrogacy laws are really bonkers and old fashioned and I'm glad it (hopefully) went smoothly for you but how stressful. We would both be on the birth certificate and because there isn't a third or fourth parent involved it's relatively straightforward but I do think it's good to have a written agreement on stuff. At the moment, on advice from books and other parents w similar arrangements, we have a written agreement about custody, location (agreeing to not move to another city/country) finances and some other stuff. We also have agreed to attend at least 6 sessions of mediation should anything go horribly wrong or communication break down. I'm pretty sure we can do a sort of parenting version of a prenup but I need to get some legal advice about what's possible I think! If nothing else writing it all out did really help us feel more prepared.

@polkadotpixie oh god I googled the ovusense and now my Facebook is wall to wall fertility ads 🤦‍♀️I know nothing about them but @Larrythelizard had something similar to it I think, Ava bracelet was it?

@lakejupiter yeah I just assumed the parenting would be like a couple that had split up before the baby was born? Exact same rights? As both are legal parents. Only it'll be more amicable as you actually like each other. 🤣 Its much easier being there are no 3rd parties involved too. So it all seems pretty straight forward?
@polkadotpixie I know someone who was looking to sell an ava bracelet (ended up not needing it)? I've never used one but yes temping did stress me out. Definitely worth getting some basic fertility checks.
@Somatronic omg that sounds horrendous! Talk about incompetent.
@BellatrixK glad to hear about the tupperware 🤣

Yeah good shout @Manifestingbaby. I bought the Ava bracelet @polkadotpixie. I don't think that it as accurate as BBT either orally or vaginally but it definitely showed a trend. I then put the temps into FF as I much preferred their charting than the Ava app. I've attached my Nov chart so you can see it does chart properly.

My preferred piss pot was one of the ones that a Gu pudding came in

Wowsers @Somatronic that sounds ridiculous! I always piss everywhere when trying to fill a test tube even when not in massive pain! Random question but have you had your tubes checked? My friend had an appendectomy when a teenager and they fucked her tubes so she had to have IVF for her baby.

That sounds way more prepared than most couples are pre-baby @lakejupiter!

@lakejupiter there's def still hope, I mean especially if you are feeling a bit of a hormonal mess 😜and your situation does seem more straightforward than surrogacy & that you've thought of lots of different things, def means you are more prepared than a lot of other couples like @paintfairy &

@larrythelizard says 🤪

Wall to wall fertility ads @Manifestingbaby they are watching you 👀👀👀😬

Get you with your fluted glass piss pot @larrythelizard 😂

@polkadotpixie def worth trying the soy isaflavones (or whatever they are called) if they worked before

@Juno231 that's fantastic!
@lakejupiter piss in hand is perfectly normal, I'll have you know
@BellatrixK I find the humus pot has the most optimal shape 😲🙈

@Minster2012 I've been on a "hide this ad" spree 😂

@larrythelizard yeah it's ridiculous alright but Ireland has always called foetuses (real or imaginary) above women so not surprising 😅 I had a Hycosy done which was all clear so I assume that I'm all good?

I mean placed, not called.

Thanks all - yeah we are basically a lot like a couple who have broken up before the child is born except we like each other more 😂 it helps that we are good friends and are pretty frank with each other, though I did almost throw my phone across the room yesterday when he told me to stop overthinking 😂

So I bought a two pack of FRERs to give it one more try this month and immediately started incredibly heavy AF on my walk home from the shops 🤪 had a bit of a cry when I got home. Coparent seems unphased but I guess he's not been quite having the same TWW as me, and is also not bleeding from his vag. Gonna eat my feelings and curl up with the cat tonight and then start getting organised for Feb inseminations.

@Somatronic peeing in a test tube with acute pain seems like a perverted crystal maze challenge.

@Minster2012 do you have a good relationship with your surrogate? I'm so glad you found someone -- I know a gay couple who have really struggled to find a surrogate and also can't adopt for a couple of reasons and it's really heartbreaking. Pre covid I was looking into egg sharing with a local clinic but I aged out of the scheme and luckily found my coparent around the same time. But my understanding is that it's much harder to find surrogates and egg donors than it is to find sperm donors.

Well he's still a bloke @lakejupiter 😂so comments like "don't overthink it" are kinda expected 🙄. Our surrogate was my best friend who kinda said on my hen do as I was throwing up from chemo side effects not drink "well if it works & you can't have babies I'll have your babies for you!" Nearly exactly 2 years later her& her hubby & us were in the ivf clinic trying to get her pregnant in secret 😂so we were very lucky, but it took us nearly 2 years to organise & we had looked into trying to find a surrogate & prepped our families it would take years (we didn't realise that my best friend & her hubby had actually been having conversations about actually stepping in) as we researched "the wider market" so to speak. They are his "oddparents" ❤️🥰we couldn't adopt either as at that point I had stage 4 malignant melanoma even though kept in remission with radical new treatment it is classed as incurable so yeah we couldn't either 😡it's so hard, your friends must be heartbroken but surrogates are out there, just in short supply.

@Somatronic loving the idea of getting a crystal for getting piss in the test tube! Rather than passing out

@Manifestingbaby and how do we snooze these ads?!

And I guess he will never understand the shitness & physical pain of bleeding 🩸 no matter how invested they are 🙄@lakejupiter sorry about the horrible heavy AF arriving

That's an incredible story @Minster2012 though I'm sorry you went through all of that and very glad you're in remission. And pregnant! Oddparents is very cute 🥰

I might have a chat w my coparent about what this last two weeks has been like from my perspective - it doesn't help that we haven't seen each other and have only talked on the phone/text. And I've been keeping my charting and mumsnetting and emotional ups and does a bit under wraps so I probably sounded more nonchalant than I was. But yeah it's hard to explain to anyone without a uterus!

I can't adopt because of a mental health crisis and associated hospitalisations in my misspent youth many years ago, and my coparent wouldn't be eligible bc of his age. The whole process seems brutal tbh.

@Minster2012 on Facebook if you click on the dots in the top corner you can hide the ad and you shouldn't get more from that company.

Oh that's good @Somatronic - I hadn't heard about it as a thing before.

@lakejupiter I don't think the men ever get it really...my DH certainly didn't!

Thanks @larrythelizard - having a heavy flow and heavy mood day so gonna wait until I feel less like Carrie to talk about next month's inseminations. Want to try every other day during my fertile window instead of three days in a row like we did this month but will require some logistics! I'm also gently trying to nag coparent about getting a SA - he as going to do it in November but didn't and still hasn't booked it...

Hope you all have a good day ❤️

I feel you @lakejupiter - DH steadfastly refused to give up protein powder or créatine powder despite all the advice saying it could affect sperm 🤷🏻‍♀️ (my story btw is that we were trying for 11mo for #2 and then stopped because I got a new job and was waiting for enhanced mat pay to kick in but had drunken unprotected sex once in Nov and now I'm 10.5weeks pregnant...)