First timers, TTC. Safe space for brain dumps...

[TinyDancer91]

Hi everyone!

This thread may or may not contain questions, I've mainly started it to be my brain dump safe space but in an excited way, not a bad way...

Me (30) and my SO (34) have decided to take the leap and start TTC! We have both wanted children for a while but just knew the timing wasn't right for either of us until now. For me, any time I see a baby or even baby clothes recently my heart aches for it to be my turn. I've never really had that strong feeling before.

The reason behind this 'safe space' is that we have agreed not to tell anyone we are TTC. We just want to avoid any pressure or disappointment if things don't go to plan, etc.

For context, I am the youngest of 5, the only girl the only one of my siblings without children.
SO is the oldest of 2, his brother has a child who lives with BM away from here so isn't really seen much by grandparents.

Both families are great and would only want the best for us but I personally don't want to feel any sort or pressure at all (intended or not) from either side.

So, we start our journey, we are on cycle 1 SWI, not expecting anything to happen this cycle and trying not to turn in to a crazy lady about TTC

If anyone else needs a brain dump safe space, feel free to join me here x

[LucyLoopyLu]

@LauraA31 @TinyDancer91 thanks both, it does help to have these places to vent as I don't feel like I can discuss it with my friends and family. My husband is supportive but I feel a bit embarrassed about how much its affecting me

[LucyLoopyLu]

@polkadotdasies88 I know exactly how you feel, although I didn't get that on cycle 1 I have definitely felt that way the past couple of cycles and hearing other people boasting about getting pregnant really quickly just cuts at me.
I am also sick of people complaining about their small children. I keep these thoughts to myself because I know they're irrational (being a parent is really hard) but I just find it so hard to hear at the moment.

Hope you're ok, be kind to yourself

[TinyDancer91]

Welcome @polkadotdasies88

Hoping Mother Nature is kind to you soon 💕

[TinyDancer91]

I just tested again but with a cheapie. Don't feel like I can keep justifying the cost of FRERs every time.

It was a BFN, 12dpo, would have expected to see something by now if it was going to be a BFN.

I'd be lying if I said I was ok, even if I was kind of expecting it. 9 cycles of nothing. Not even a chemical.

Starting to get the feeling of 'it's never going to happen, why do we keep putting ourselves through the heartache every single month'. Feel like any strength I once had is rapidly fading away.... I just dread each cycle and the inevitable visit from AF now

[mgwyegve]

@TinyDancer91 i am so sorry that this wasn’t the cycle for you. It’s so tough, but it WILL happen for you!! 9 cycles is only 9 attempts. I know it feels like forever but in the grand scheme of things it’s literally 9 tries, and with only a 15-20% chance of falling pregnant each cycle the odds really aren’t in our favour!

That being said I know how tough it is to stay positive and how awful it feels when there’s yet another BFN and AF arrives once again.
I caved and told my best friend that we are trying, I didn’t want to tell anyone until we had happy news to share but I’ve been struggling and she’s always so brilliant and making me feel everything’s okay. She’s very much into the power of the universe and affirmations… something I’d never really considered but worth a try if it helps me stay a little more positive hey!

I’m going to take a little break from testing and tracking for at least the next cycle (see how long I can last without obsessing) it’s my OH’s birthday and we have some nice things planned and a little break away. Just going to try and relax and put it to the back of my mind for a while as let’s face it, it really is physically and emotionally exhausting.

positive thoughts and baby dust to you all! Keeping everything crossed for some BFP’s for us all 💕✨

[polkadotdasies88]

@TinyDancer91 I fully agree, I can't bare to hear anyone moaning about their children, even though like you say I know it's tough I just think you don't know how lucky you are! ❤️

On reflection today (feeling a little more rational 😂) I think the constant comments from my family member about how they had conceived on the first go off the pill had really got in my head & I was setting myself up to think the same, big mistake!

I'm feeling better today, don't know how to play this next cycle whether to carry on with all the tracking or just take a more relaxed approach, if I can. Which I know full well I can't 🙈

[AgeGapBbe]

Sorry to hear of so much disappointment 😢
I’ve had 2 positive ovulation months now, I have only in the last 3 months ish had a more regular cycle back again after my implant was taken out in feb. We’ve DTD at the ‘right time’ but nothing so far.

it feels great to be getting the positive results but I’m 35 and dp is 56 so I really worry what if he doesn’t have any decent sperm anyway and nothing I do will make it better.

I don’t know when to go to the dr to have it looked into. I said I’d go at Christmas time if no joy but I don’t want to leave it too late! Best case scenario would be an October/November BFP.

[AgeGapBbe]

It’s hard isn’t it. When we started, we were all ‘see how it goes’ then I had no periods so I got ovulation tests, which I started tracking. Now I have pregnancy tests too- just cheap ones. And I now tell do when I’m ovulating and we make sure to dtd at the right time. Not really the ‘see how we go’ that we said back in feb! I guess that was a while ago though.

[LucyLoopyLu]

@AgeGapBbe the NHS recommend you go to the doctor if you haven't conceived for a year (under 35) and 6 months (over 35).
I guess if it was me I would go sooner rather than later if I could.

I'm 34 in October and my husband is 36 so it's 1 year for us even though we're on the older end of that scale.
I was thinking we could go for some fertility testing earlier and pay to go privately but havent discussed it with my husband yet. There is somewhere fairly locally that runs all the usual tests for a fixed fee.

[TinyDancer91]

I'm out.

AF arrived with a vengeance this morning.

[LucyLoopyLu]

So sorry @TinyDancer91, hope you're ok.
AF got me this morning as well, but I was expecting it

[BeeLieve86]

hey girls,

AF got me yesterday too. Two days early! This year I have noticed my cycles getting shorter. Not sure what that is about. It’s ever since I started tracking my ovulation.
I was a mess yesterday, very tearful, so I took it really easy for the rest of the day. I was also very crampy. It’s like it came on with a vengeance.
I am going to think positively, new cycle=new start. Im going to eat really healthy, stay active, meditate, journal.
onto cycle number 2! Baby dust for you all ✨✨✨

[LauraA31]

Morning ladies!
Sorry for all where AF has arrived; im fully expecting to join you all in 5 days.

I am 9DPO today and still have super sore boobs when they’re touched, my nipples are tingling too. I’m moody, want to sleep all day and have headaches and dizziness on a night. I don’t usually have this but convinced myself it’s not pregnancy related, think ive got so used to seeing BFN’s the last couple of months i won’t let myself think this could be anything more than nothing!

Hope you are all keeping okay!

[TinyDancer91]

Hi ladies

How are we all doing?

[Babydust99]

@TinyDancer91 waiting for af to arrive on Friday

[LauraA31]

Hello ladies!

I got my BFP at 9DPO- 12DPO now and the lines are getting sooooo much darker. Got my positive digital at 10DPO also!
Im nervous, AF due on Wednesday and in my mind she is going to arrive.

Im shattered, had two naps this evening and work is really taking it out of me. Im hungry all the time and so thirsty but can’t seem to stomach water.
I have started to feel a bit sick last night but it went away pretty soon, feel sick when im hungry.
Still can’t seem to accept this is happening, think because it is such early days and im worried anything can go wrong!

Hope you are all keeping okay, and hope AF holds off for everybody expecting her!
Added a photo of 10DPO and 11DPO tests, all tests done in an evening! x

[BeeLieve86]

@LauraA31 CONGRATULATIONS 🎉🎉🎉 how many months had you been trying? That’s lovely news!

@TinyDancer91 all fine here, AF nearly over so let the BD commence. Been journaling and meditating the last few days and it seems to be helping with the stress and worry, but I definitely still have my moments. I also ordered coQ10 and DHA supplements for us to take, which we started as soon as they arrived. Do you take anything like that? I’ve heard they are very good for egg and sperm quality, although take 3 months to make a difference. How are you doing?

baby dust to you all ✨✨✨

[Plantymcplant]

@TinyDancer91 I'm still trying to work out what's happening to my cycle post pill. Fingers crossed things become more normal soon. My main goal these next few weeks is patience! My TTC journey is not what I expected to far. How are you doing?

[Glawen]

Morning ladies, can I jump on for some line eyes please? I am 12dpo today and up until now have had BFN tests, just blank white. Today DH and I can see a really faint line. The hardest thing in the world to photograph so not sure it'll show but can you see anything? Xx

[Zubi]

So this happened last week, have taken some time to get my head around it!! Can’t believe it. Symptoms have started straight away, it’s crazy!!!

Sending all the baby dust in the world to everyone xxxx

[LauraA31]

@Glawen when i zoom in on the second photo i can see something super faint! Fingers crossed for your next test!

@Zubi Congratulations!!!! X

[thecoconutcat]

massive congratulations @Zubi !! how exciting.

I'm 9DPO and experiencing some mild cramping. My periods are super regular and not due until the very end of the week. Cramping is unusual for me so trying not to read too much into it!

[Babydust99]

Does this look like an indent? I've had indents on these tests before but not dark enough to show up in a photo like this one. I thought I saw a shadow on it earlier and thought it was an indent again but just checked it when I got home and this is how it looks now its dried out.

[HappyPie82]

Still waiting for my period since miscarriage it will be 4 weeks on Tuesday.
I think I may have ovulated last week as had ewcm but my bbt chart is all over the place (I effectively called the day of my d and c cd1)
Got some OPKS coming from Amazon, going to hit this ttc like I do everything in my life and go all in haha

[LavenderWillow]

Hi Ladies, hoping I can jump on this thread after reading through.
Me and my hubby decided to try for our first over this summer, having never really wanted kids before.
I tracked with easy@home opks and found my peak yesterday on CD 17, started getting darker on CD 16.
think that means I’ll be ovulating today?
we BDd on CD 15 and 16, and haven’t been able to since and won’t be able to until a couple of days time, so unsure whether this month will result in anything.

keeping my fingers crossed for everyone and sorry if AF has already arrived.

I just wanted to check if anyone has experienced ovulation spotting? I can’t think of a time where I’ve spotted before in the middle of my cycle, but I had spotting this morning. Just feel it’s weird that I finally pinpoint when I’m ovulating and then I spot!