Month 12, 6 DPO, fed up and loosing hope

[fingerscrossed91]

Hi all,

I apologise in advance if this post is negative but I'm so so fed up with TTC. We have been trying for 12 months and haven't even had a hint of a line. My three best girlfriends (and soon to be bridesmaids) have all announced they are preggers this past month. Whilst I'm genuinely ecstatic for them I'm hurting so much as I don't believe it will ever happen for me.

I had to take a few days off work at the start of the week when the third told me they were preggers as I was just so overwhelmed and upset. A few days eating rubbish and watching Netflix made me feel a bit better but I have just lost hope that I will ever see a second pink line let alone have a baby.

I'm currently 6DPO and even though I know I won't be pregnant I'm still working myself up about it. I (stupidly) did a test today which was obv a BFN but it's like I can't help myself. It like a weird form of self torture!

I'd be so keen to talk to any hopeful mummas in a similar boat - let's keep everyone sain!

xxx

Good luck OP please update! Xxx

Been a lurker on this thread for a while now, so pleased to see a second line for you @fingerscrossed91 🥰 it looks like a good line for 9dpo! We've been on and off trying for the last 18 months, I'm cd32 and got bfn and no sign of af... don't even think i ovulated this month! Hopefully some more positive stories from this thread x

@xoJellyBean thanks so much lovely. Fingers crossed it wasn't just a dud test!

Welcome to the group 😊 how long are your cycles usually? Do you track or do OPKs? xxx

Oh best of luck OP!!

@fingerscrossed91 awh thankyou. My cycles are usually 30-33 days. I do OPKs & usually temp but haven't in the last couple of months to try and 'relax' so bloody fed up lol Xx

@dreamersdown thanks sweet x

@xoJellyBean I also have longer cycles. It makes it even more annoying when TTC.

Do you have any children or are you trying for your first? xxx

So I can't believe I'm posting this, but this mornings results...

I genuinely didn't think it would happen for me. Now Im stressing that it sticks and that the next 9 months go to plan.

If it's ok with you girls I'd like to stay on this thread as I'm desperate for you to get your BFP's too (which will happen!). xxx

Congratulations OP!! 🥰 so happy for you. All the best!

@fingerscrossed91 trying for our first little bean!! Like you said, it feels like it's never going to happen. Seeing your bfp is giving me hope 😍 congratulations xx

@fingerscrossed91 massive congratulations 🥰 I am so happy for you! That must have been a tough nights sleep waiting to test again this morning!!!! Such wonderful news to wake up to! What did your OH say? Fantastic to have a BFP on this thread and of course stick about ❤️ it's been great chatting! Any wise words on anything you did differently this month?

@xoJellyBean welcome! We have been trying for about 18 months now too! I've an internal and HyCosy booked in for next month. Have you had any investigations? Xx

@fingerscrossed91 huge congratulations!! 💕 Have you told OH yet? I'm sure you're in disbelief and also so excited! Really happy for you hun X

@HJen22 thank you so much lovely, that's so nice of you to say 😊 I barely slept if I'm honest. Did the test in the downstairs loo at 4 am and snuck back into the bedroom and just started at OH waiting for him to wake up 🤣 he is super happy but is being very cautious about getting too carried away as we are so so early.

The only things I did differently this month was not track / use OPK's, kept busy and tried not to symptom spot. It's a little bit annoying as everyone was telling me to relax but it's so much easier said than done when you have been trying for ages.

How are things with you sweet? xxx

@HJen22 thank you 💕 Im having a relatively short period (for me!) so no choice but to look forwards. I have cried a lot the past couple of days and you're right there's really nothing you can do but go through it. Just before AF I'm always thinking this is the worst time of the cycle not knowing and then AF comes and I'm like nope this is definitely the worst!

That's great your holiday is nearly here, lots of chill time and distractions 😊 wishing you luck in your fw!! Last month I didn't use opks but I did temp, this month I'm tempted not to do either but I don't know... think I'm gonna try conceive plus tho x

@xoJellyBean hey 👋 and welcome! TTC is the most frustrating thing ever right?! Also interested to know where you are investigation-wise? I'm waiting for DP's SA results and extremely nervous 😩 x

@suzy124 @HJen22 thank you for the welcomes 🥰🥰 I'm so glad there are others like me. It's somewhat comforting! I saw my GP a couple of months ago and she did my day 21 bloods - she said she was ok with them but was still concerned so I was referred to the fertility clinic in June. 14 month waiting time at the moment apparently 😓 will keep trying anyway.

@HJen22 how do you feel about your Hycosy?? Xx

@suzy124 hope your DPs results come back ok! 🤞🏻 have you had any tests yet? Xx

@xoJellyBean did the gp explain why she was concerned if it showed you ovulated? Jeez 14months is a terribly long time, where are you based? I've had my day 3 and 21 bloods which were fine and was referred to fertility clinic last month. Doctor said it should only be a couple of months before I hear from them so I'm really praying that's the case! Has your partner done his SA yet? I just have a bad feeling about ours, so hope I'm wrong! X

Hi girls, do you mind if I join in?

Similar story here - today is CD1 of cycle 13, one chemical back in September but nothing since, feels like I’ve tried absolutely everything. Had day 21 bloods and DH has had his SA, all fine.

Although I obviously wish none of you were going through this, reading your thread made me feel much less alone ♥️

Congratulations @fingerscrossed91 on your bfp! I saw you have long cycles but didn’t track this month, so did you dtd every other day? I’d love to take time off tracking but I’m scared I’d miss ov..

@suzy124 she said that she's limited with the tests she can do and because I had been trying so long she wanted to get me referred ASAP. She also said day 21 bloods arent always accurate depending on cycle length so who knows 🤷🏼‍♀️ I am north of Ireland 😭 really hope it doesn't take long. At the same time I'm super scared of getting invasive tests 🙈 my hubby is moving to the same GP as me and then we will get his SA done. Fingers crossed for you 🤞🏻 xx

@xoJellyBean omg are you? I'm from N.Ireland! I know how slow things can be there so I really hope the wait isn't that long for you and that you won't need it in the end! Yeah I had my day 21 bloods on day23 as I was expecting a 30 day cycle but AF arrive early 🤦‍♀️ doctor was happy enough though so didn't need to repeat. Would she also do day 3 bloods for you? Funnily enough my OH is also at a different GP so when we get the results I then have to give them to mine lol. Would rather he had moved to the same surgery but what can you do! x

@Amy259 welcome! I remember you from my SI thread! How are you getting on? Sorry to hear that AF has shown her ugly face today, it's just devastating isn't it x

@suzy124 thanks for the welcome! I’m okay thanks, really thought we were in with a chance this month as we tried SI and I’d taken some new supplements too. And we covered 4 of 5 fw days.. so it’s a bit tougher this month that it didn’t work. I honestly feel like I’ve tried absolutely everything at this point!

How are you getting on?

Also, just reading above, my DH and I have diff GPs too, in different council areas (don’t ask!) and I keep wondering if we should change.. we’ve been referred but no letter or anything yet. We’re also moving house to a 3rd different local authority, so will need to move doctors eventually too. I think I’ll just wait and ask at the hosp maybe but feel like it could delay things x

@suzy124 omggggg we might know eachother 🤣🤣! I'm County Antrim! Well you've just given me some hope that my GP was maybe giving me worst case scenario 🥰 she mentioned repeating my bloods so I might ask her about day 3 as well 😊 these men and their different GPs 🤣 are you taking any vitamins? Xx

@Amy259 welcome 🥰 I'm new here too! X

Congrats @fingerscrossed91 what fab news!!!!!!!! I was thinking of not using OPKs this month! Do you think not tracking helped? Did you DTD more do you think as a result of not tracking!? Xxx

@Amy259 welcome to the thread, its horrible we are in this situation but its so comforting to have others to talk to

Ugh I feel your pain, the other month we DTD 5 days in a row and I really hoped it had worked, sadly it hadn't! I've had not one sniff of a BFP since we started last March, and i have quite short cycles so this is now cycle 18!

@xoJellyBean hmm I'm not overly looking forward to my appointment for internal and HyCosy, but I am glad its come round reasonably quickly. I'm so scared that something is going to come back wrong! My partner's SA came back all fine. The Fertility Dr also freaked me out when I had my first call saying my FSH was a bit high so I am going to ask about that, and about 21 day bloods as I haven't yet had them. I need to be cautious not to make it obvious I have done a lot of googling haha! I really hope its not that long a wait for you to speak to a Dr!

@suzy124 how are you feeling today? I really hope a little better. And thats good that AF isnt too long this month! How were the cramps? I'm doing OPKs and BBT this month again, i felt a bit better doing both last month and "knowing" (or as much as you can i guess!) but there have def been months when i have just needed to do none and have a rest. xxx

@Amy259 yep been there! One month we did it 7 days in a row and nothing! And yet some people can have a 'whoops' one time and get pregnant, it just doesn't make sense does it? I'm also having tougher time this month as I really thought it had worked and was gearing up to test, then AF showed. Sending you big hugs

The fact that you have different GP's shouldn't delay things, since it's primarily us females who are referred if you know what I mean. When I was referred my surgery just rang me to get some of OH's details and that was it. Then I just have to give them the SA when we get it, even though it was done at the same place we've been referred 🤷‍♂️ x

@xoJellyBean ha maybe we do! I'm from county Down but living in Hampshire as my OH is from here. Yes ask your GP for repeat progesterone and also day 3 bloods, I find it weird how it's not standard to just do both for everyone!

I'm taking a prenatal, Omega 3 and last month started taking ubiquinol too. What about you? What cd are you now? x

@HJen22 I'm a little better than I was thanks, ended up crying again this morning and I think OH got a bit frustrated with me but on the whole he has been a lot more understanding this month. I though AF had stopped but she's returned lol, just very light now. Cramping was only bad on day1 and also not the worst. How are you feeling now? Are your opks still getting nice and dark?

Yeah I know what you mean, I really want to track but also don't. It's hard not to as it's so nice confirming ovulation but also want to be more relaxed and not think about it! x

@HJen22 I'm sure they expect us to be googling everythinggg🤣🤣 I hope it comes back all good for you🥰 you can let me know how it goes because I will probably end up getting the same tests done!!

@suzy124 ahh so you're living in England? 😊 I will defo be asking, thank you! What's the ubiquinol? I'm just taking seven seas conception for now 😊 I was on to Pregnacare but just changed this month. I'm CD33😓 had some fleeting cramps there now🤷🏼‍♀️ what about you? X