Trying to conceive over 40

[October1979]

Here is a new thread for us girls

Of course you can @anirek welcome to our group.

Sorry I've been mia, on my second loooong cycle in a row and just been going through the motions before my gynae appointment in august really.

@Honey2 sorry for what you're going through, hopefully the docs will have some answers for you and help you!

@Geriatric1234 I kept adding lots of supplements in and I think that may have contributed to my long cycles, though I can't be sure as it was all fine for ages and now it's gone haywire

@Catconfusion that's exactly what I was told with the wait for gynae back in March but I got my appointment through for august instead so not too bad. Massive congratulations so so pleased for your bfp and hoping for your sticky little bean!

@99pctpractice that's so odd what they said about you not getting pregnant naturally with a low amh as my understanding is that as long as it's not zero you still have a chance naturally, it's more if an indicator of how ivf will work for you.

@Mattieandmummy I know exactly how you're feeling about it never happening, I feel the same. That's good news about the adenomyosis specialist though, I may look into something similar if I don't get much help at my nhs gynae appointment

@Littlemiss41andfabulous so pleased your scan went well

@sabtom great news about your scan absolutely lovely to see

@October1979 do try not to worry, they can't always see a heart beat at 6 weeks plus twins tend to be smaller as they're both trying to feed, 🤞🏻 everything is ok

@anirek hi and welcome, this is a lovely group of supportive ladies

Welcome @anirek!

Are you on your 7th or 8th cycle? A lot of us are in the same boat.
I'm Cycle 8 myself. I'll add you to our list!

Some days I can be quite "if it happens it happens" and other days I'm scouring the internet looking for clues as to when I can expect to get a BFP. Today happens to be one of "those" days :(

CD6 here... and should be entering fertile week about now.
How is everyone else?
Spoke to the doctor today and he said to give it another 3 months and then call him. And that if I have regular cycles then I'm probably ovulating.

@Marvellouslymadmum how long is this cycle so far?
Any idea when you ovulated?

@birdbybird yes I'm cd31 and 4dpo at last! I have false ovulation a few times in a row before it actually happens. Last month was a 51 days cycle I think, this won't be far off 🤷🏼‍♀️ this is cycle 40 ttc for me 😞

Welcome to the group @anirek x

@anirek I’m so sorry it’s been such a difficult journey for you. Fingers crossed for good news soon. This is a very supportive thread. Xx

Thanks @Marvellouslymadmum I’m so sorry you’re having such long cycles again. It’s so frustrating. My ds was conceived on cd 33 and this baby cd 28 so it can happen late in. I’m hoping you get good support at your appointment next month. Xx

@birdbybird if you’ve been trying for over 6 months and over 35 you should be getting a referral. With the waiting times for appointments at the moment it’s not acceptable to say come back in a few months. Could you speak to a different doctor? Xx

As for me I’ve officially missed AF and am now 16 dpo. My ics are darker than the control line. I’m also feeling quite nauseous. Annoying my tummy is huge and bloated so hiding it is really hard. I had to wear the baggiest of tops at a family bbq on Sunday. I think we’ll tell parents this week as I had severe sickness with ds so might need some support. My anxiety is a lot better but I did wake up this morning convinced I was bleeding. Luckily was just increased cm. It’s going to be a long couple of weeks until we can have a scan. Xx

Morning all!

Hi @Honey2 I haven’t! I will probably test again on Friday as I’m not doing anything booze related through the week 🤣🤦🏻‍♀️ I figure I’ll wait as long as poss so I can be confident in the result.

Am at the hormone point in my cycle where I get deflated and think “why am I even bothering?” I can’t understand how we had a BFP on cycle #1 and now when we are timing everything so carefully we can’t get one! It’s very frustrating!!

Welcome @anirek xx

Thanks everyone for the supportive words, I actually had my first 28 day cycle since my daughter last month.... So maybe we have turned a corner 🤞

I also met a lovely lady at the weekend with severe adenomyosis, she takes pain killers every day and she was pregnant with her 5th child. She said adenomyosis is different for everyone and not to give up so easily, basically gave me a bit of a kick up the bottom which I think I needed.

My NHS fertility appointment basically said yes you have it, there's no treatment, don't worry about it and yes it effects your fertility 😬 hence the specialist appointment! I'll let you know how it goes @marvellouslymafmum, it's in two weeks.

Welcome @anirek x

Also @catconfusion congratulations on being officially pregnant... Not that you weren't before but now you've missed your period and it always feels more real when that happens

@Catconfusion thank you, I'm just dreading being dismissed again!

@Geriatric1234 it's totally frustrating! We had a bfp by accident back in 2017 which ended in mc and now zero zip zilch! It's like our bodies are teasing us!

@Mattieandmummy I read that it can be different for everyone, I guess it just makes me want to blame it when I'm not getting pg!

Hi everyone.

Thanks for letting me join. I think we’re on cycle #7. I’ve been trying to be chilled out about it but I’m just fooling myself. I was so gutted yesterday to see sporting. It wasn’t there this morning but even that doesn’t give me hope as it has stopped and started in previous months too. I have googled implantation bleeding to death and I just know its not that. The only time I didn’t spot before AF was with my bfp’s.

@Catconfusion that’s amazing to get test lines darker than control lines on ic’s. They never went dark for me!

I love to see photos of bfp’s. I think I’m mental! Haha

@Marvellouslymadmum RIGHT?!? I’m like “errr…you did it before Body, do it again!”

Hi everyone. Congratulations to those of you who are pregnant and hello to those who are trying.

I'm new here... I'm 43 and had a miscarriage last year and one the year before at 7 and 11 weeks. Both would have been due in April and my two DC both were born in April so I'm hoping this is the month for me. We've not really been timing things - it's felt like there's been something on each month to distract us though this month we've been going for it 😂

My DH is older than me and doesn't have his own children and this feels like our last ditch attempt. We went for fertility tests 2 years ago. My fertility was in line with my age but his SA was low. I feel like the odds are against us but along side the MC we've had 2 chemical pregnancies so I know we can do it.

Anyway that's me, wistfully reflecting on getting pregnant without trying when I was younger and then sailing through pregnancy and birth. Compared to now when I feel like I'm past it!

@Catconfusion so glad everything is moving in the right direction! not surprising that you were anxious given everything that was going on. plus pregnancy hormones!! must be a relief to see the lines getting darker!

welcome, @anirek . yes, it's so hard to get your hopes up each month and then get AF after all...but there's always next month :)

hello @43andtrying , sounds like you have had a rough time of it. fingers crossed it will happen for you - i know what you mean, with my first (and a MC before that) i was pregnant basically first time of trying. now, not so much...!

Latest list is below.
I’m happy to be the data officer for the group. ;) although some of us are onto the next cycle now… I didn’t think of that one! Clearly not very good at my job! Maybe I should convert cycle # to month/year when started ttc.

@Marvellouslymadmum let me know if you’d like me to add you to the list. Completely optional ofcourse.

TTC:

birdbybird - 40, TTC#2 - Cycle #7, losses in Cycle #1 and #2
Lastyearttc - 42, TTC#2 - Cycle #13, and 3 prior losses
Geriatric - 42, TTC #1 - cycle #7, 1 loss
Honey2 - 41, TTC#4 - Cycle#5, had early MC cycle#2 and #3 and chemical #4
Gingerfox2021 - 41, TTC number 2. Cycle 6 when following OPKS, before couple of month without sticks.
Mattieandmummy - 40, TTC no. 2 cycle #7, 1 miscarriage, 1 chemical
99pctpractice - 40, TTC#2, cycle #6, 1 miscarriage and 1 chemical.
Mum2baby07 TTC #2 (first with partner) age 42 8mths cycle #1 actively TTC with all the gubbins #1 chemical April 2020 and #1 MC June 2021.
anirek - 40, TTC #2, cycle #7
43andtrying - 43, TTC #3 (first with DH), loss in 2019 and 2020

BFPs:
sabtom: age 41 and 7 months, TTC#1 since Jan2019, MMC in May 2020. Failed IUI in Sept 2020. BFP in June 2021. Currently 8weeks.
Littlemiss40andfabulous - 40, TTC#1 - got BFP (currently 12 weeks) when TTC on cycle 12, One CP on cycle 9.
catconfusion - 42, TTC #2 - cycle #5, early mc on cycle #1 #3 and #4
October1979 - 41, TTC #1. MMC cycle 1, CP cycle 10, 13,14, BFP15

@anirek I have an almost 20 month old and they are adorable at this age (although getting into the terrible twos).

I never considered myself a baby person and now love babies and toddlers!

Thank you so much @birdbybird Guess mine can now read something like this.

Catconfusion - 42, TTC #2 since 01/21 - early mc on cycle #1 #3 and #4. Bfp on #5. Currently past 4 weeks.

Thanks @99pctpractice it’s such a rollercoaster. I wish the worry could end with a bfp. It’s just on to the next set of concerns: will the scan be ok etc. I must say I’m feeling hopeful this time. Xx

@anirek it’s so weird. I got a clear positive on 8dpo. I did a frer today at 16dpo and the test line is taking dye from the control. I joked about it being twins and my DH nearly had a heart attack.

I’m so sorry to hear you’re spotting. I hope you get a surprise and it was implantation bleeding. Xx

@Marvellouslymadmum I hope they take you seriously and support you with these long cycles. It’s so difficult to ttc when o is unpredictable. Xx

@Geriatric1234 exactly and it annoys me even more when I see all these unicorn pg without trying even though I'm 48 and had sex once in two months and now having twins people 🤦🏼‍♀️

@43andtrying welcome and sorry to hear if your losses. It's so hard isn't it when you know you've done it before it's like I don't feel much different to when I got of with my children so why is everything not working the same!! There's some evidence to say that with a low count every other day is the way to go and other evidence that says everyday without fail so may be worth a try at a month of each (although maybe just the fw for the every day 🥵)

@birdbybird you can if you like, I've been here so long everyone probably knows me by now lol I'm 42 ttc#3 but 1st together, cycle 40 or 3.5 years ttc with 2 mc

@Catconfusion thank you, me too or I may just break down and cry in their office or throw a tantrum 😂

I got my NHS antenatal bloods back today and am in the lower risk category for Downs, Edwards and Patau's syndrome even despite my age. That's a nice surprise as I was expecting them to come back high and need the NIPT blood test.

That's great news @Littlemiss41andfabulous!
I'm getting the NIPT test done next week, I'm too impatient to wait another 2 weeks lol
I know the NT scan measures the back of the baby's neck, but what are they looking for in the blood tests?