Ttc #1 - cycle 7

[rosiej95]

Really fed up of AF showing up month after month now 🤦🏼‍♀️ we've been taking the see what happens but dtd lots approach. But now going into month 7 so We've decided to use the clear blue opk's to see if it gives us a better chance. 🤷🏼‍♀️
Now to just wait for AF to disappear 😀

Any one else ttc #1? 😀

@Amy259 I was exactly the same. Some nice posts but discovered more people that's have had newborns and just felt shit. Don't even have any true hope anymore. Totally giving up (without actually giving up).

@rosiej95 I just hadn’t expected to feel anything really - which is silly, of course I would feel a bit sad! Hope you’re all good now too!

@AZ1992X I love your positivity ♥️♥️

@Loops01 I feel ya, I definitely pre-empt a bfn now rather than wonder if I’ll get a bfp.

@Amy259 I think what made it worse as well was that AF was here. 😂 if she hadn't arrived I would have thought there was a slight chance & been happy ha
Instead AF decided to absolutely destroy my insides & I was in a mood most of the day 😂

@Loops01 totally with you on that one!
I'm going to have another month on opk's
We have got to be close to getting our bfp surly? 🤷🏼‍♀️😂

Hi ladies, how are you all doing?

I had the start of a temp drop today and bfn at 12dpo so it looks like af will be here sat/sun as predicted! We’re skipping next cycle for a few reasons - still not sure if it’s a good or bad plan, but I guess we’ll see.

DH phoned to book the drop off of his SA sample yesterday... first appointment they had was 24th May! I knew we’d have lots of waiting ahead but naively I didn’t think we’d be waiting just to hand in a sample 😂

Hope you’re all having a good week!

@Amy259 hope you're both doing OK. We were the same with the SA. Appointment was over a month away from when we requested. I find it a bit silly considering the tests are done very quickly. I know cos I used to do the ones for those that had vasectomy samples to confirm if it was successful or not. It all feels like it takes forever yet we are constantly told the longer we wait the harder it is. Not fun. We should have DHs SA results back next week or so. I will tag you then to let you know what we get told in details (if we do!). I hope your cycle break is a bit of a stress relief and hopefully hear from you soon!

@Loops01 I couldn’t believe it was 10 weeks away.. especially when he doesn’t need to see anyone, or have a consult, or wait for a specific part of a cycle like we do 😂 yes please let me know how you get on!

Thank you! DH is really starting to go inside his head and feel the pressure (which meant we missed the best days to bd this cycle), falling next month would mean my due date wouldn’t qualify for full mat pay at my new job by only a week (which feels more painful that not qualifying by months!), plus with my ov date our due date would be Boxing Day - which isn’t that important in the bigger picture, but when they all add up it feels like the right time to have a break. It’s a lot mentally too, so I think I might take a complete break from tracking but not sure if that’ll make me wonder even more. Ask me again if it’s a good idea in 2/3 weeks time when I know I’m about to ovulate 😂

@Amy259 haha totally understand you. I had decided to give up opks as I know my body well now to know via CM. Then I went and bought easy@home ones to try them out! Fed up of clear blue. I get the job thing too. I want to change job but matty leave would be an issue. Not enjoying work at all atm and it's really getting in the way of life and seeing my partner (working on average 60 hours a wk) but I know when pregnant it'll all change then matty leave then I can get a flexi pattern after so it's like there's light at the end of the tunnel but the longer it takes to get pregnant the harder the work slog becomes. I think we were 7 weeks to wait for SA and 3 weeks to get results. DH is the same, he is starting to worry its him but its probably just life and time! Please keep us posted anyway!!!

@Loops01 so good to talk to people in similar boats! I use easy@home too with the Premom app and really like them. I wish I didn’t need any at all but we just aren’t ever going to be that couple who have sex every day so I need to know 😂

The pressure/stress has started to prevent DH (potential tmi here) from performing when he knows it counts, which understandably makes him anxious about even trying. This cycle we would’ve got it spot on day before peak and o day, but then I ovulated late (typical) and he couldn’t manage to finish... so we missed the best days. I’m not really sure what to do about it, but maybe the time off will help him reset. Then hopefully his SA is good and that’s one less stress.

I would get stat mat leave now but if I have a due date after 5th Jan I would get the full policy which is 6 months full pay, 3 months stat. So since we’re so close to that timeline, it seems sensible to skip a possible Christmas due date now. It’s tough, but I’m hoping a month without a tww is lovely!

60 hrs a week is brutal, good that you have light at the end of the tunnel to keep you going but must be tough to be ttc when working that much!

@Amy259 yeah it's horrible, especially working different shifts to DH. We have had to set alarms to have sex. It's horrible and not fun at all. Totally get where your DH is coming from. My DH struggled with the SA because he hadn't done it before and was nervous about missing the time etc. Didn't help that as he went to get started the clinic called him to ask about covid haha.

What I have heard (which is a bit extreme but if needs must) but there's a product that's like a syringe that is DH is struggling but can produce themselves at a more suitable time then you basically suck up his little swimmers with the syringe type thing and insert it in. It began with an M. It may sound silly but it makes sense for those that do struggle for whatever reason or if they are due to be away or something. It was a convincing story I read about it anyway. We aren't there yet but I would totally consider it. One of the girls I know (lesbian) decided to use that with one of her gay friends. She got pregnant first time. I was happy for her, amazed it worked but also fuming!!!

@Loops01 aw that’s tough - I can’t imagine setting alarms half way through a sleep to dtd is fun at all. Yeah my DH is worried about that too, we live 45 mins from the hosp he’s to take it to!

I think I’ve heard of what you’re talking about, or something similar called M-something Baby? DH and I are so different when it comes down it though - I’m very to the point, crack on, whatever it takes. Scheduled/timed sex can be rubbish but needs must etc. Whereas he’s a bit more sensitive to it all, so I have to tread lightly at times. I actually have syringes at home (work related, I’m not just weird!!) and casually mentioned it when he couldn’t this cycle and he said he the thought of it was enough to make him unsure he could even do that. I think we just need a ttc-free zone for a couple of weeks and I’m hopeful that helps!

That’s amazing that it worked first time! But yes very infuriating!!

How’s everyone doing? , I’ve had another person (family member) announce their pregnancy today. Feel like all I’m seeing on my social media is pregnany announcements and babies xx.

I am the similar, social media is constant. I have 2 friends who posts at least 6 pictures or videos a day. I want to unfriend them because of it but I guess it's more jealousy. Hope you are OK @AZ1992X. Never easy when it's family. I'm dreading the day my sister in law beats me to it. That will be a difficult one. I'm cd11 and should be starting fertile window soon. As much as I want it to happen there's no joy or excitement left. I will do the deed and move on and try not to get my hopes up. Not feeling any of it. I have given up without actually giving up. Opks etc have just become the norm now. It's horrible. Void of emotion I feel. I hope some are feeling better! To be honest it's nice having company of others in the same cycle or near to. I hope we all manage to get positives (soon too) but I guess if me or DH have issues it's nice to know that there's other people feeling it and we aren't alone in our thoughts, feelings and troubles. Sorry for the ramble. I feel ya!

@AZ1992X it’s so tough isn’t it? Is anyone NOT pregnant just now?!?

@Loops01 I know what you mean, any emotion I feel towards it now is negative - anxious and overwhelmed being the main ones. Maybe being void would be better, but either option sounds rubbish. I’m on a “month off” and trying to be less consumed by it so deleted my app, removed myself from the fb page I followed, no OPKs, resisting the urge to google stuff etc (probably shouldn’t be here either but this is the one thing I find helpful rather than damaging - feel so much less alone!). I’m sick of reading bllsht about it happening when you relax, how the hell do I do that?!

@AZ1992X it's the worst feeling
My best friend had a little girl last month & when she first told me she was pregnant I was so happy & ecstatic for them but then on the way home I cried. Not even she knows that we're ttc so when she was saying how it only took her 1 cycle I was like 🤦🏼‍♀️
But she's an absolute beauty & means I get a bit of practice in before it's our turn 😜😂
It's so hard tho & I totally get it. I hope your ok too @Loops01

@Amy259 totally agree how do you actually switch off something that has taken over your life? 😂🤷🏼‍♀️

I'm on my 3rd day of flashing smiley 🎉

I know. I started this journey being like yay we will all get there and it'll be soon. Now I'm like ffs can we just all get there already. It is good to hear of people on here getting the bfp and although I'm sure we all get pissed off and jealous it's not us, a part of me is like aw I'm glad they managed as I know they were struggling in some way and now they can have that happiness that I hope to feel soon too. I think this place has calmed me in that sense. I have spoken to one person (out of many) who said it took them a year (she didn't do opks or anything but didn't 'try') and she said she wished she started earlier too but she loves her son so much and he makes all the stress and everything worth it. I never hear her complain about her son. Whereas I know a few dad's who's partners fell pregnant quickly and they always complain of something. So as time goes on that longing to love I guess might mean we have more love to give and will appreciate things more. Although I'm definitely trying quickly for #2 after #1!! Haha

I hope this month off helps you see things better. I think we're never detached emotionally from ttc but I do hope this little time helps you and your DH. It's definitely not easy either way.

Oh 3rd day flashie! Yay! Not long now. I always remember you're the first to reach it out of the rest of us with slightly longer cycles or later ovulation. Keep us posted! And congratulations on being an aunty (in the non genetic way)! She'll be good to know when you finally get your bfp and she can advise you on things!

Thanks all, so glad to hear I’m not alone! I’m so happy for everyone around me but just feel down it’s not me. I’m trying to avoid social media as much as I used too. Might even have a break tbf!

@Loops01 I’m day 11 too so will be trying again soon. Will just see what’s happens but not feeling as positive as last month.

@rosiej95 glad you’ve got your smileys, going to start my opks Wednesday.

Thanks all again ❤️

Evening all, been a bit quite last week or so. I'm on CD11 and I normally don't OV until cd18ish I got a slightly dark line on an OPK so I'm slightly worried I've missed my chance! Will test again tomorrow with CB test! I've been so busy at work I've totally forgot the timing of the month! DTD Sunday so hoping if I have peaked early I've caught it! Such a stressful situation 🙈🙈

I am the exact same Cd and predicted ovulation. I have started the easy at home kits and I have seen a rise in colour but I guess it's because fertile window is pretty much starting so maybe it's that? Maybe your ovulation day might be a few days earlier and you're maybe getting to peak? My last two ovulations I've been able to pin down thanks to the lovely cervical mucus but not seeing any change yet. Been a quick start to the month but I am sure the tww will be as long as ever

Morning everyone :)
Ive ran out of sticks, used my last one yesturday & didn't realise so I've not been able to test for my static. If it repeats like last month then I would have had my static today. 🤞🏻
So we've been dtd just in case.
How are you all doing? :)

🙋‍♀️ Hi @rosiej95

Ah fingers crossed for you!

Not doing too bad thanks , hope everyone’s doing ok.

Just got my first flashey today but they went on for a while last time so may still be a few days until I get my peak!

Whoops not sure what that weird icon is on my previous message. Autocorrect 🙈

Hi all,

Been a tough few weeks for myself. Been doing such long shifts at work and then DHs has had a close family member pass away. I'm ovulating just now and we have done the deed the last few days but won't be able to do it from now on as he won't be here as needing to travel and my work schedule gets in the way. Also found out that next month, during the entire fertile window I have to go travelling for work. Just feeling really down about work getting in the way of ttc. Its stressful as it is nevermind getting in the way 2 months in a row. Been using the easy @ home tests instead of the clearblue and much prefer them. Although I did a clearblue too just to check. No flashing smileys on CB, just straight to static but with the easy@home ones I could see the progression more which I liked. Although because I'm not at home to take them and work doesn't really allow breaks I had to sneak one in my jacket pocket and use the top of my nivea lipsalve tube to pee into to get the result! So that was weird and awkward haha.

How is everyone else getting on? Rosie you must be on DPO now? How far? Hopefully not a long ttw!

Hey @Loops01

Sorry to hear you've had such a rubbish time lately ❤️
Ahh you never know doing it the last few days may still give you a chance! 🤞🏻 that would be amazing for you! 😍

Ha! I mean that's skill tbf with the lip salve tube 😂😜

I think I'm about 4dpo 🤔 I'm keeping busy which I'm so glad for cause I hate the 2ww.
I think if it doesn't happen this month I'm going to ring the docs & just be like whyyy is it not happening 🤦🏼‍♀️😂😂

@rosiej95 I am going to do the exact same thing. I'm hoping we don't have to but let me know what they say or do if you get to that point. My gp is all via email/online portal thing atm but will keep you posted with that.

Also @Amy259 I think it was yourself that I said I would keep posted re DH SA. He called the doc and they said the results were 'normal' so I made him get a phone appt to see numbers or what they can do next for him/us but not sure if he will manage to take that call if he is busy with funeral things.