TTC 8 months in, still early days but starting to feel more and more every time AF arrives

[30somethingyorkie]

Thought I'd start this post as hoping there are some lovely ladies in a similar boat to me.

DH and I are now 8 months in TTC and no luck. We both really want it to happen though he does have a son already so not always as emotional about AFs arrival every month as I am.

I know it's early days still and some have to go a lot longer but I'm now starting to get to the worried/upset stage. Get pangs of sadness when I see a baby bump or something pregnancy related in the shops, on TV or online.

Would love to hear and support others who are in the same boat as me

@CausingChaos2 no not since Friday. Going to test tomorrow 😬

Eek good self restraint! Let me know what happens!

Hi Everyone, hope you don't mind someone else adding to your thread. I have just read all the comments from the beginning and finally feel like people understand my situation. Myself and OH have been trying to conceive for 12 months now and I didn't think it would be this hard. I have only been using 2 apps to track my fertility and after reading all your posts I am defintely getting some ovulation sticks. We are both overweight so I knew it might take longer but didn't think it would be this long. He has a daughter from a previous relationship, I love her so much but desperate to be a mum. Congratulations to the ladies that have had their BFPs I hope to join you guys soon. Wishing baby dust for everyone who hasn't had theres yet

Hi @JessLouisee welcome! Yeah deffo try some OPK

@CausingChaos2 I tested this morn, CD34, probably around 5 days late now and still BFN and no sign of AF 😩

It was AF. I'm numb to it now I think - my OH's SA is booked for 22nd Feb. Smack bang when I'm due to ovulate and my birthday weekend. Fingers crossed I ovulate either early or late! But at least we will get answers xxx

Welcome @JessLouisee the ladies here are lovely
AF came again. Went to the doctors, first nurse was lovely and helpful who did the bloods, second one for swabs was really rude and I left feeling quite upset.
I'm booked in for the day 21 bloods and another app with the horrible nurse in a couple of weeks. X
Hope your all okay

Oo fingers crossed @laura2093!

I've just managed to get through to the docs, for the test results, bit different to yours @CausingChaos2

Day 21:
Progesterone 34 nmol/L (reference 3.8 - 50.6)

Day 2:

LH 6.4 iu/L (Follicular reference 1.8 - 11.8)

Prolactin 143 mIU/L (40 - 530)

Oestradiol 111 pmol/L (Follicular reference 98 - 571)

Testosterone 0.6 nmol/L (0.3 - 1.7)

But its true.. they all seem to be within a 'normal' range, but don't know whether normal for that particular time!

I'm now unknown number of DPO, but definitely feeling all sore boobs, hungry, so it seems like I did ovulate..

Any updates from your end Crazydoglady123 ?

That’s terrible Lovebug06 no one should be left feeling like that after an appointment, especially one where you could be feeling vulnerable having swabs done.

Your results look good and in range like you say tavileh I’m no expert but I think your progesterone test shows you did ovulate too.

I’m not impressed with my GP practice at the moment. I’ve had the bloods done that they requested and they’ve now come back and said I need a smear test and swabs before they can refer. My smear test hasn’t been done because I have a history of trauma, so I hope they aren’t suggesting I must have it done before they refer me. I’ve made a provisional appointment for a smear but seems unethical that I’m not willingly consenting to it. No mention of the ultrasound scan they said I needed done either. So after making contact at the beginning of December I’m still not even in the system of being referred.

Hey @CausingChaos2, Af came after a really long cycle for me but lasted 2 days. I pranged out a little though as I passed two big fleshy purple lumps of tissue 🤢 I'm cd4 now, have a scan with my NHS consultant booked on cd16 to check my cysts but we also have chosen and booked our assessment with the IVF clinic now which is in March.

That's really rubbish about your doctors. Can you keep pushing or see a different gp within your surgery whose maybe a bit more understanding?

Crazydoglady123 Oh god I have passed tissue before. Think mine were decidual casts 🤮

I’m glad things are moving along for you, March will be here in no time and at least then you should have a plan. Keep us updated with your scan too.

Thanks, I’m going to try and speak to a different GP next week. Just feels like so many hurdles to jump over and this is only the first step.

@CausingChaos2 yeah I did see them on google. I showed my OH a picture of mine and he's like wtf have you took a picture for 🤣 I had to explain us girls like to take pics of stuff like that in case we have to show the doctor haha. I will do. We haven't DTD for ages now because of the cyst pain. Although I'm not allowed the Clomid this month I don't want to waste trying but at the same time am scared it's going to hurt still so feeling pretty apprehensive about it (I may have to have a few glasses of wine Valentine's Day and try then 😬) OH did say about waiting until after the scan but I don't want to risk missing ovulation.

Honestly, I know Covid is a ball ache and delays things in the NHS but as soon as I met my consultant he got the ball rolling on everything so fast! Within a few weeks I had the hycosy then he moved me straight onto Letrozole for a few months. I'd go see your doctor again and turn on the water works and just push. If I hadn't with my referral my gp would be quite happy leaving me to carry on trying for another year!

Oh @CausingChaos2 that's so frustrating, you should definitely try to speak to a different doc, you can have such a different experience depending on who you speak to. Also, as @Crazydoglady123 says, just really push for what you want, and you're more likely to get it. Often, if you just tell them what you need, they'll sign the paperwork - they are so overworked, they normally just want to get rid of people .

Welcome @JessLouisee! Its definitely worth tracking ovulation if you can, helps with timing, and also reassuring to know that that part is working ok!

On my side, I'm CD 27 now, no idea how many DPO because monitor didn't peak, but I think I'm nearly at AF time.. my boobs were mega sore again this month (thanks for making me all optimistic body!), but now less so, I guess that means AF just round the corner.. I'm feeling really depressed about it this month. I'm just tired of trying.. this is cycle 14, and i cba with all this emotional rollercoaster . That and one of my colleagues has just announced she's 13 weeks, and my sister in law is coming up to 8. Just feels endless some months :(

Needed a bit of a rant, sorry.. DH puts up with it sometimes, but he's bored of it now, and honestly so am I!

@tavileh I get that. I don't know if the lockdown, or the time of year just making it seem so much worse at the minute but I myself know how hard I'm finding things right now. I don't know about you but I'm finding it really hard to switch off from it at the minute. Don't ever apologise for ranting on places like Mumsnet. My OH doesn't understand how it makes me feel and can be damn right insensitive about it but the ladies on here are always so supportive and you need people around you who understands as TTC can be a very lonely place and all the hormones in the mix just makes it feel 10 x worse. I know I'm the first person to symptom spot but with my previous child I had little to no symptoms with him so I would just go from when AF arrives and yours hasn't yet. When are you due on?

Thanks tavileh and you’re probably right. Sending you a hug - it’s so shit as the number of cycles ramp up isn’t it? Especially when you don’t have an explanation for why it isn’t happening. Do you temp? I’m fortunate that I usually get a peak on OPKs but temping confirms ovulation better. I know some people find it too stressful. I try to temp most days but don’t get obsessive if I miss a few days, I can still see a general pattern in my charts.

It’s tough with the pregnancy announcements. Does your SIL know that you’re trying? We’ve got a baby due in the family any day now, conceived after we started trying. Genuinely happy for them, their other DC is gorgeous, but also glad lockdown means we won’t have it in our faces. I think I will have to leave it to OH to buy a little outfit or gift for the new baby.

I’ve managed to get an appointment with a different GP now (one who knows why I don’t manage smear tests) so fingers crossed things will finally get moving with the referral.

On the other hand, my blood test for rubella immunity has come back saying I’m not immune. I had all my childhood vaccinations. Have done some quick reading up online and it seems that it’s recommended I’m vaccinated again before pregnancy. So two vaccines at least 4 weeks apart, and then at least 4 weeks before TTC is recommended. I know it sounds silly but I don’t want to waste 2+ months of potential TTC! I’ve looked up the stats and there were 3 cases in the UK of rubella in 2019. I wouldn’t have even known I wasn’t immune if I hadn’t been having trouble conceiving.

Crazydoglady123 Do you mind me asking if the cycle you conceived was different to your usual symptoms? I usually get sore boobs, water retention, bloated in TWW. I always wonder whether I could have these pre-AF signs and be PG, or whether the month you conceive is different and I wouldn’t get my usual signs. Hope that makes sense?!

@CausingChaos2 is that normal to test for Rubella immunity? First I've heard of it being tested, that's all.

Tbh, I was one of those super lucky people who got pregnant so quick I didn't really get a chance to learn the difference between AF and pregnancy. The only symptom I noticed was needing a wee frequently.

I’m not sure Crazy the GP didn’t discuss it with me. I just turned up for a different blood test and the nurse said the GP also wanted Rubella, Hep B, Hep c & HIV bloods.

Oh no, @CausingChaos2 that is such a pain about the rubella! I know that there was a particular cohort in the 90s who didn't get their booster shots, I remember when I was at secondary school, a few people got it, and they realised we all needed another shot.. maybe it was something like that.

AF arrived this morning, and I just feel angry and fed up. I'm so over it. Getting DH to go for his test now, he's been really reluctant, but I just said he needs to do it now.

I've not been temping, just doing OPKs, I find it stressful to wake up and have to measure my temp.. there are some wearable thermometers that are a bit tempting now, but they are so expensive, not sure if I can justify that! I wish there were some cheaper options that didn't involve me needing to remember every morning...

Meh, this covid + fertility situation is so getting me down, I feel like my entire life is on hold until one or the other changes. It just feels endless sometimes.

It is a pain tavileh . My DM said I had all of the vaccines and boosters so it’s a bit of a mystery.

I’m feeling really down and fed up too. My temp has dropped this morning so AF is on her way today or tomorrow. I have awful periods too so that’s something to look forward to. 🙄

Sorry that you’re feeling the same it’s the most awful rollercoaster of becoming hopeful each month only to have it dashed. I said something similar to my DM - at the moment life just feels meaningless. Existing, not living.

Please do get DH to get his test done. My OH really didn’t want to either, but in the end he was glad he did and was relieved to have the results back.

Hope that anyone still following the thread is getting on ok

tavileh How are things with you? Are you feeling any better?

Hi @CausingChaos2

I also hope you are all okay on this thread. We all go quiet and then come back again.

Today my bloods come back so I'm hoping they are okay. They were done on day 20 rather than 21 as 21 was on a Saturday so hope that doesn't make too much difference.
AF is due this week. The dread is starting so trying not to think about it too much.

I hope your doing okay. This group needs some BFPs

Hello Lovebug

I hope all is well with your bloods. Try to get the numbers and the ranges if you can. I’m sure the one day difference wouldn’t be a problem. My progesterone was a day out - GP didn’t query. Hope you can keep busy to keep your mind off AF arriving.

I had to have a rubella vaccine so we weren’t allowed to TTC this month. Unfortunately there has been a mishap although honestly not worried and not going to count myself as in the TWW now.

I’ve also had an ultrasound appointment come through from my GP. I thought this wouldn’t be done until I’d been referred to fertility. Don’t know if it needs to be done at a certain point in my cycle. So will need to check that.

Hey ladies

Sorry I’ve been quiet, been trying to take a more relaxed approach. But still no luck from me😩 currently CD30, AF due today / tomorrow and my boobs have stopped hurting so it’ll probably come tomorrow.

Will be going onto cycle 15 😕, trying to stay hopeful that it’ll happen before the 2 year mark. We won’t investigate further until then as FYI to the newbies my partner has a son so we don’t qualify for nhs funding but all tests have come back perfect 🤞🏼 Trying to keep that positive mindset!!

How’s everyone else xx

Hi girls. Hope you're ok. Good to hear from you!

Still no news here I'm afraid. Been trying to take a more relaxed approach and ditched the OPKs. DH had SA this morning but not holding much hope as we only managed to get a 3rd of it actually into the pot, so that will probably need to be done again. He wasn't in the best of moods so doubt he is going to want to do that all again anytime soon. So been feeling a bit miffed today. I've got my GP appointment on Weds to go forward for more blood tests and hopefully get the ball rolling for me. On cycle 13 now.

Whats everyone's thoughts on the covid vaccine has anyone had it yet or been offered it? I'm unsure whether to wait and have it once I have a baby!?

@30somethingyorkie is all ok with you? xx

@SparkyLauz all ok here, thank you for asking.
Felt bad posting any updates without being asked but all my initial scans went well and no issues, however...... we found out we are having identical twins!!!!
Totally in shock and feel so lucky but terrified at the same time as there are huge risks with identical twins so I'll be scanned every two weeks!
And don't even ask me about the morning (all day) sickness, but if it means they are growing and healthy then what does it matter that I'm sick 5 times a day!!

Hope to hear some good news from the rest of you soon, I keep coming on to check

@SparkyLauz don’t you love and hate the relaxed approach. I try and do that every so often and my stupid brain thinks “omg I’ve been so relaxed it’ll definitely work this month”😂

Sorry to hear about DH, I can’t imagine that being fun for either of you. Our doctors refuse to test DH because he already has a child which seems crazy as that could have been a lucky one! 😅 let us know how you get on at your doctors apt. I know what you mean about the feelings, it’s hard isn’t it. DH is really supportive, but I don’t think it’s hit him until recently and now he’s even bought himself wellman conception tablets bless him. I never knew how hard TTC would be on me mentally. I’m up and down like a yo-yo!!!!! Optimistic, happy, excited it could be the month, then cry when I get AF. Lol! It’s crazy. But I’m holding out hope for us by the end of this year girls 🤍

I’m so stuck with the jab too! I’m thinking of waiting. Am I right in saying if you have it you have to wait 3 months until you can try? Or did I make that up!

@30somethingyorkie wow!!!!! Omg that is absolutely amazing 🤩 congratulations lovely. Glad you’ll be scanned often though that’s really great and more checks with the babies☺️ Please do keep us posted I do love hearing everyone’s stories. We’re all on our own journeys, just sucks some of us are still here with no hint of a BFP! So happy for you x