Trying to conceive baby No 1 over 40

[October1979]

I am 40 nearly 41 and ttc baby no1. I fell pregnant for the first time in December but suffered a missed miscarriage at 8 1/2 weeks in February. I've been trying ever since with no luck. I use Clearblue advanced fertility monitor. Take vitamin B, C and Co Q10 as well as pre conception tablets daily. Until lockdown I did weekly acupuncture. I guess I'm feeling low as af turned up today and I turn 41 very soon.

I am usually positive and hopeful. Trying to think what's for me won't go past me...

Looking for some buddies in the same boat or some over 40s who conceived naturally to give me hope and share their secret to success.

Hi @Bouncytree I'm doing fine. Totally symptom spotting too. I've felt a bit nauseous- but that could be down to the over eating. I've also felt that I've had a lot of saliva for the past few days. Slightly sensitive boobs but nothing out of the normal for this point in cycle (7dpo). Trying not to over think and get carried away. But can't help it.

@October1979 yes it is hard not to overthink it isn’t it.

Boob pain getting stronger here...and us in my armpits too which has happened when I was PG before. They are really quite sore.
This really does feel quite distinct. I’ve toyed with the idea of a FRER but I just don’t want know early...though it is driving me mad! I keep thinking I am PG...but of course the opposite is probably lord possible! Definitely getting my hopes up now, though I keep trying to climb down off that...so awful when you see BFN.

When are you testing? I’m going to test on 1st which is 12dpo. It is totally dragging now! And I’ve too much time to think about it!

Hope your doing ok

Hi @Bouncytree I'm doing well. Slightly sensitive boobs. But lots of excess saliva. I noticed this the last time so hoping it's a positive sign. Unsure if this is a sign of period or pregnancy? I can talk myself into anything!!! Too much time to think too. I sanded the dining table to keep my mind off things. I'm trying to hold out to the 1st too to test. This will be me 12dpo too. Part of me thinks if there are strong symptoms then you have a chance of a positive. Let's hope this month is our month.

Hi @October1979 glad you are doing well. I don’t think excess saliva is a common pms symptom.😯 Lol sanding the table to busy your mind thatS hilarious! But I totally get it. Time is the enemy in the TWW isn’t it.all sound positive your end so far.

I’m feeling quite hopeful this month. I just can’t trust my body after the last few months pms. Though this does feel different. I’ve learned that you just can’t let yourself believe you are PG till u see a positive test. It’s too hard if neg.

Oh wouldn’t it be wonderful if we got bfps on the first! Come on 2021! Fingers crossed for us both.

I know what you mean @Bouncytree it is so disappointing when you get your hopes up only to get a big fat negative! I'm rooting for us. Here's to 2021! I'll be sanding something else tomorrow to help the time pass

Hey ladies, I’ve got everything crossed for you. The symptoms sound really promising. It’s so difficult to get through the tww. Frers are such a double edged sword. I got a positive on one with ds at 10dpo. It was lovely knowing but terrifying as very early.

I’m on cycle day 18 which is the day I ovulated last cycle. We dtd on Sunday and had planned to this morning but ds is going through a sleep regression so he’s in bed with me and DH is on the sofa. I’m not tracking LH as I’ve got false positives in the past. I’m thinking we’ll just dtd tonight and maybe in a couple of days. I don’t think our chances are great this cycle. I plan to properly track next cycle. Tbh I really want to lose a bit more weight. Christmas hasn’t helped with that. It obviously would be amazing if we were lucky and caught quick but I’d feel more confident going into another pregnancy at a healthier weight,

I really do hope you both get some good news soon! Xx

Thanks @Catconfusion. You never know your luck, so many positives come from just one or two tries. I will keep my fingers crossed for you. I feel quite nauseous from the excess saliva today. Also boobs a bit more sensitive. Please let this be my month. How you doing today @Bouncytree? Any new symptoms? Have you succumbed to the frer?

Thanks @October1979 we will see.

The excess saliva is definitely an early pregnancy symptom. I got nausea really early too. I’ve got my fingers crossed for you! Xx

@Catconfusion thanks for the positive thoughts. As long as you are DTD every couple of days you are covered. Yes I’ve fallen off the wagon with my healthy diet over Xmas...but with the year that is in it...it just had to be done. I’ll be back to the fish and olive oil in Jan! So true in relation to FRER. It’s hard going trying to PG when you have a toddler isn’t it! 😅 when are you due AF?

Oh fingers crossed @October1979 really hoping it’s your month too 🤞🤞🤞 it’s been a tough road for you. Sounding positive. Do you normally get pms symptoms?When are you due AF?

I Havnt caved to FRER yet but still on my mind! releaved boobs are still sore here. I woke this morning and not so much, but it seems to increase through the day. Had surges in my arm pits Lying on the couch last night. Quite tired though that could be anything, slight edge of nausea but not much. Though I’ve had a few twinges and pulls in my tummy, and no pms cramps which ive had last few months. Just Quick stabby pain 5dpo and then cramps in lower tummy, moved to sides and under ribs. All very strange and totally getting my hopes up!

When is the 1st?? Come on already 😭

All good signs @Bouncytree sounds promising for you. Well done on not early testing. The 1st is Thursday so not far away. Fingers crossed for all three of us @Catconfusion @Bouncytree . My AF is due on the 1st as always have an 11 day luteal phase. My cycle should be 29days this month as didn't ovulate until day 18. Which is 5 days later than normal. It has been 25/26 days for the past 8 months. I always used to ovulate about day16/17 before my mmc in February. Maybe my body is just getting back to normal? Funny enough it was Christmas last year when I conceived. I'm hoping December is my month. My boob sensitivity was strong this morning but not so much now. Does it change? Saliva still there. Fingers crossed for us girls xx

In my experience the symptoms come and go so don’t worry about them not being consistent, especially this early. It sounds like you’ve both got a good chance.

Before DS I had really irregular periods so difficult to know when AF would come. Last cycle it was a 34 day cycle. I think I may have ovulated today and my luteal phase is about 17 days so about the 15th January. It’s difficult to know though. My ds was conceived on day 34 of what would have been a cycle of over 50 days. I really hope I’ve not gone back to cycles like that. It’s so hard to know when to try. I think I’ll just keep going with dtd every couple of days until I can test. Xx

I use the Clearblue fertility monitor @Catconfusion and it has been good at telling me when my most fertile days are and let's me know when I'm ovulating (peak day 2) I bought mine second hand on eBay. It also lets you test for pregnancy

@October1979 it’s quite difficult for me to use fertility monitors because of my cycle length. Quite often they say a maximum of 35 days and mine are usually longer than that. I also get false LH surges that don’t result in an ovulation. My body then gears up again about a week later. Monitors usually can’t cope with the second surge. The only accurate way I’ve tracked ovulation is with temping. After a rise I know I’ve ovulated. Ovusense is really good but we can’t really afford it at the moment. I do have a smart thermometer that sends the temperature to my phone but I can’t find it at the moment. Our ds is teething at the so very little time to find it. I might just leave this cycle. We’re so exhausted as been up multiple times in the night. You never know I might have already ovulated. I’m not sure I can face dtd every couple of days at the moment on little sleep. Xx

I see @Catconfusion sounds exhausting trying to predict. I will keep my fingers crossed that when you have dtd you get lucky.

Thanks @October1979 I just hope my cycles have regulated. I thought I’d be ok with not particularly tracking this cycle but I’m now getting a bit stressed not knowing where I am with things. I can get all the signs of O then it doesn’t happen so it’s confusing without temperatures. Then as my luteal phase is so long it’s such a long time before I get AF.

Not long until you can test. I do hope it’s good news for you! Xx

I totally understand @Catconfusion. I get stressed with dtd with a cycle of no longer than 28days and I can monitor. You have a wee one, trying to cover all bases for so long must be so overwhelming and knackering. Thanks for the positive thoughts

Yes it’s definitely challenging. Obviously we’re blessed to have DS already but feel time is running out for a sibling so the pressure is on. Just wish we had more time!

So today I’m feeling nauseous and dizzy. Starting to wonder if I ovulated like a normal person this month. We dtd last Wednesday and day 14 was Christmas Day. I’m annoyed at myself because I had a few drinks over Christmas. Even though I know it doesn’t affect things early on it still worries me. Omg what if it’s just happened just like that!? I’m starting to panic now as just assumed I’d ovulate on day 18 like last cycle. I’ve ovulated in day 14 about twice in my whole life. I’m now going to find my thermometer so I can do my temperature tomorrow. Eek! Xx

@Catconfusion that is really tough going not knowing when you ovulate or how long your cycle will be. It is a nice relief when you know you’ve peaked and you can give DTD a rest for a bit 😆 My DS is 3 and it’s hard work fitting inDTD to a schedule...some days your just wrecked.

It’s easy to feel stressed about it. But you don’t have to find your peak you just need to DTD every few days. We got PG with DS doing it every 3 days and not testing for ovulation.

Definitely worth getting hold of that thermometer. It have you tried OPK strips? I got a big box of easy@home on amazon and they last for ages. Miles cheaper than clear blue or boots. 50 for 14 quid.

Getting mixed signals here. Nausea last night v bad and mild today. Boobs still sore. But some mild cramps a little like AF coming. I’ll be gutted. I really got my hopes up this month. 😭

How are the symptoms @October1979?

Hi @Bouncytree I have some light cramping too. Boobs a bit sensitive but always are at this point. Saliva still noticeable but nothing else. Beginning to think I've got carried away too an af is on way. Might test tomorrow dpo 11. At least I can have a wee drink if negative. Don't know if it would be better to know tomorrow or on the 1st.

@Bouncytree the problem is without temping there’s no way of knowing if it was O as I sometimes get all the signs and it’s not. The LH strips don’t work for me as I get false positives. Basically I have it had a mild version of poly cystic ovaries. During pregnancy the cysts were gone and my cycles have seemed shorter since so it might have got better. I know sometimes having a dc does sort pcos.

I definitely felt a bit like AF was coming when pregnant with ds until it didn’t. You’re not out yet! Fingers crossed! Xx

@October1979 I’d test tomorrow. You should get a result on an Frer. I got a positive on an ic at 10dpo with ds so it’s probably going to show up. You definitely deserve a drink tomorrow night regardless. Fingers crossed and good luck! Xx

@Catconfusion ah yes I see. That is frustrating. Hope you find the thermometer. Thanks for your positive thoughts. Fingers crossed you hit ovulation this month and I hope your cycle settles. 🤞

@October1979 it’s a tough one isn’t it. Dailey good chance of showing up with a FRER 11dpo I’d say. I’d defo do FRER rather than regular if you want a drink just in case.

Have you seen this?
www.countdowntopregnancy.com/pregnancy-test/dpo-chart.php?dpo=11

You can put in the dpo and it tells u how statistically probably it is to get a positive. Not much percentage between 11-12 dpo.

My cramps have subsided. 😳 for now anyway. Very confused. Felt just like AF but then went a bit odd and stopped. Could go either way at this point. I feel like you too maybe I got carried away. But you just don’t know till test/AF so your defo not out!
🤞🤞🤞

I’m gonna try and wait. I don’t want to fork out for yet another FRER now I’m
This close. I’m gonna test the 1st at 12dpo

Nearly there 😅

What did you decide @October1979? Are you testing?

Very booby here and cramps gone away completely since last night.Nausea for 3 days. So feeling hopeful again.

Sounds positive @Bouncytree . I tested using the Clearblue fertility monitor and frer and got negative on both. Starting to feel light cramping. So think AF is on her way.😤

Sorry to hear that @October1979. I hope your doing ok. At least you can have a drink To wish in the new year.

Yes I keep convincing myself and then have to pull back because I sing want to be completely gutted. But there ya certainly nothing yet to suggest I’m out.

I will be testing first thing in the morning! Watch me race to the test 🤣 I’m
12dpo tomorrow. They are just regular tests not frer...u think it should be accurate enough by now?

@Catconfusion hope things are going ok for you