TTC #1, cycle 13 and fed up! Whose with me?

[Theawkwardblonde]

Hello. So AF arrived yesterday which means I'm officially on cycle 13 of TTC. I'm a healthy 28 year old with husband whose 33. We've had 2 chemical pregnancies in the time we've been actively trying. We are just waiting on our dates for blood tests and SA for husband.

Needless to say I'm bloody fed up! Had 3 friends announce pregnancy news in the last week, and one friend is due in 4 weeks. TTC is definitely starting to take its toll on both of us and the realisation that something may be wrong is starting to sink in.
Who else is having similar? Please feel free to share/rant!

How's everyone getting on? I'm out this month (negative frer)

Hope you're doing okay @CurbsideProphet

Hi @Theawkwardblonde how are you getting on? Have you had your bloods re done yet?

I had a positive opk stick on Friday so hoping I’ve ovulated after my abnormal bleed that started the day before my day 21 bloods last time that showed no ovulation. So crossing my fingers. At least if nothing else hopefully means I’ll start AF in a few weeks and can re book my bloods. As GP said to wait till me next normal bleed before booking. No SA until Jan so otherwise all a bit on hold at moment.

My work friend who I though was pregnant weeks ago told me properly last week. Felt a bit shit but she did it in the nicest way she could as I’d mentioned a few things to her so she knew I'm having some difficulties. Also another announcement at work too. Felt pretty low last week.

I’ve been considering getting some testing done privately but not sure if it’s advisable or not, don’t know if nhs would use it and doubt it will help us get any further forward faster so not sure if it’s worth it.

Hope everyone else is getting on ok.

@Rosie189 hello! Bloods have been re done this week so should have results on Monday providing no issues in the lab again.
DH is still awaiting a date for his private referral-due to his shift working its proving hard to get a date in at the hospital.
It's hard when those around you are announcing so I understand how you feel. You're so happy for them, but at the same time a little party of you does inside. It's got me really depressed if I'm honest. Find it hard speaking to anyone around me about it as shock! They're all pregnant or just had a baby 😞

I know how hard it can be when it feels like everyone is pregnant or having babies but it may be worthwhile reaching out to close friends and discussing it. I’ve spoken with my best friend who had a baby in the summer and it’s been nice to talk about how I’m feeling and she’s also opened up to me about how much she struggled dealing with a newborn. I know that sounds like it could be hard to hear but actually was nice to cement that the most important thing is we can be there for each other even if our lives are taking different paths.

I also know that my close work friend will be very careful about not shoving pregnancy chat down my throat from a brief chat I had with her mentioning we were having some investigations. After she announced it to me I messaged her to say sorry need a bit of time to process these things at the moment but I am happy for her. She reached out to listen and chat or just be some company if I’m having a down day. They may not understand completely but they can understand we are struggling.

I think the fact I’ve spoken to them has helped me. So may be worthwhile. If not there’s always all of us going through it to. So talk/vent away! We get it!

I hope you are ok. Fingers crossed bloods get run with no issues and you get results quickly. I weirdly couldn’t decide if I wanted an issue to show up as then maybe there’s something we could try and fix or for it to be all normal and hope there’s nothing wrong with us and it will happen soon. Maybe that makes me a bit odd! I was then a mess when I got told my bloods showed no ovulation even though I knew before due to the bleeding. Thank goodness they called with my results on my day off.

@Theawkwardblonde if I'm honest I'm crumbling inside with the fear of IVF and what it entails, plus the fear of it not working. We've told our parents, but not that we've already been trying. To my parents we've spun it as the best option for dealing with my fibroid. I'm very lucky in that a relative had a baby recently, but we live 100+ miles away. I got the message about her baby literally 45 minutes before I was told we need IVF. It's no one's fault but that is grim timing. So far no friends or family are currently pregnant. I must sound awful but I hope it stays that way. It must be so difficult being surrounded by pregnant friends and family. I don't think there's anything I can say to make that better for you 💐

@Rosie189 regarding private testing why not ask your GP if they would accept private test results if something showed up that needed further investigation / referral to NHS fertility services? That way you know whether it's worth the money.

Bad news for me ladies. Blood tests show I haven't ovulated this month. So the doctors are now of the mindset that I'm not ovulating every cycle, only on the ones where I've had a chemical. So in 14 months that would be 4 (I think) times. Have to go for additional tests on Friday then they will decide where to go from there. Devastated. I knew there would be an issue with me and I was right.

@Theawkwardblonde sorry to hear this but good it's getting addressed! They'll likely prescribe you clomid for 6 months and then ivf after that. Hopefully the clomid does the trick for you! X

@Theawkwardblonde sorry to hear you’ve had bad news. At least you’re getting some further tests. My dr just wanted to repeat my bloods when they showed no ovulation. I hope you get some answers soon and have something to work towards. 🤞 for you x

The thing us, I've definitely had chemicals in the past. I've actually started taking seven seas conception about 6 weeks ago and wondering if this has delayed ovulation (read reviews that it can).
That's the only thing different, and this month (first time ever) my period has been significantly shifted which would support not ovulating this month. It's definitely different to my normal bleed. Could it be the seven seas messing my cycle?

@Theawkwardblonde I'm really sorry you're in this situation too. It's awful to feel in yourself that something isn't right and have to wait for doctors to listen.

I haven't taken anything other than vitamin D (I'm chronically deficient) and folic acid. I read a lot of reviews online about conception vitamins and cycle changes. I would think stopping the vitamins and doing the blood test again would give a more accurate picture?

As an aside, my GP saw my blood results and immediately said PCOS. The fertility doctor said the testosterone etc wasn't ideal, but not high enough for PCOS. Was this a GP looking at your bloods?

The specialist I saw also said that conception vitamins are not necessary at all and are just a ruse to make you spend money. He only recommends folic acid and vitamin D for women ttc.

@Theawkwardblonde do you normally have regular cycles ?? Seven seas aren't known for delaying ovulation in long cycles. I started taking them this cycle to shorten and regulate my long irregular cycles as that's what most people use them for and people who have normal regular cycles don't use them as it can mess up your cycles if they're normal ?

@CurbsideProphet seven seas are only £4 so they're the cheapest of ttc tablets

@lucyrp I'm very regular, with 28 day cycles. Never had a delay other than when I've had a BFP.

@CurbsideProphet yes it was a gp who looked at the bloods. Said progesterone (I think) were 15 and should be at least 30. I've been for more bloods to look at other hormones so just waiting on those to come back this week.

I've stopped taking the vitamins as quite a few reviews of women with regular cycles have said that they have stopped periods, had delayed ov and various other side effects. I'll mention it to the GP when I discuss the additional bloods.

@Theawkwardblonde yeah if you're regular then I probably wouldn't recommend taking any multivitamins for ttc. Seven seas or pregnacare tend to mess up regular ladies. I always used to be regular but since my CP been all over the place so I started taking the seven seas to regulate again. Do you do bbt ?

I feel really annoyed today. Mainly with myself. I’m annoyed that I get my hopes up every month thinking it will be different even though I know it won’t be. I’m 7dpo (I think) although the last cycle was a bit all over the place. Had some very very mild spotting the past day or so. The past 4-5months I’ve got spotting 5 days before AF never this early though. Never used to get it. So here I am convincing my self it’s IB then thinking if I was I’d be around 8 weeks on Xmas day so could maybe tell close family then. 12 weeks around time me and DH have time booked off work, meaning he be home for scan etc etc. I hate that I drive myself crazy like this. You’d think I’d be more realistic after almost 15/16 months. Anyone else still driving themselves mad symptom spotting?

I also then get pissed off that I feel broken and it’s not working. Such an emotional rollercoaster.

Sorry just needed a little rant.

@Rosie189 sorry to hear your feeling that way-use us for a rant whether you need to 😊
The spotting could be a good sign, or it could be your usual. It's normal to think of it as a sign-we all do it no matter what we tell ourselves.

Have you had any tests done at the doctors at all? Apologies if you've already answered that before.

I had AMH and bloods for PCOS last year due to irregular and heavy periods which were normal but I don’t know the actual numbers. Cycles have been more regular this year but had my day 21 bloods 2.5 weeks ago they showed No ovulation and I had a weird bleed that started the day of them. Dr just said to wait till I got a normal period then book the bloods again. DH waiting for SA appt isn’t till Jan.

Close work friend is pregnant she’s actually been great about it as I’d mentioned some stuff and she’s been pretty quiet about it at work but we’re a close team and news travels another colleague pregnant too and had about 4 people ask me this week when I’m going to try I’ve been feeling so I don’t know what that I’ve been honest and said that’s not really working out for me at the moment. I just feel so emotional when my period starts my mood is awful. I don’t normally get bad pmt or super emotional for my period so I’m sure it’s more ttc mental strain. If that makes sense. Just feeling very very frustrated at the moment.

@Rosie189 it's so awful that people would even think to ask if a couple plans to have children. It's so common to have difficulty in getting pregnant. Plus it's beyond intrusive. I hope you're feeling ok.
TTC really is a physical and mental strain. I keep getting very emotional when AF shows up yet again.

@Theawkwardblonde have you been referred to gynae / fertility yet? Apologies if you've already said. My faith in GPs has really been shaken after my experience this year 😔 so in your position I would just be asking for a referral to fertility and waiting for them to look at the bloods properly.

Very confused. Gp did follow up bloods checking other hormones (didn't say what) last week. Just rang gp and been told bloods are normal so aren't going to look into it further. So day 21 bloods showed no ovulation but my bloods a week later for hormones are normal. Wtf is going in? They wouldn't even let me book a phone appointment to discuss it further. Feeling so confused.

@Theawkwardblonde ooh I'd be raging if they wouldn't let me book another phone apt! You need to discuss with a gp. Sounds to me that your bloods last week were your day 3's. Day 21s determine ovulation so if that was below 30 it's generally low and shows an issue. Demand another apt on the day 21 outcome.

@Theawkwardblonde that’s awful they won’t let you book another appointment. Definitely should ask for a repeat day 21 bloods. Especially if your cycle was unusual this time.

My day 21 showed no ovulation but I’ve to get them repeated once I have my next cycle (started today 😢). I had an abnormal bleed at time of day 21 bloods. I think I’ve had the other bloods last year for irregular periods. Although have been almost regular for past 9 months till I had to get investigations.

Waiting till I get my day 21’s done again then hoping I can get a referral. Especially as I’m now spotting for up to a week before my period turns up which doesn’t seem right. Also think I’ve had a 10day luteal phase which is too short too. 😫.

@CurbsideProphet thank you. Hubby works away and away for pretty much a month which doesn’t help as there isn’t even the well it’s a new cycle positivity.

Hey everyone. Hope you're getting on okay. Been quiets as been on shifts this week. A quick update on me-my GP outright refused to speak to me regarding my bloods, and put down the low progesterone to a "blip". Lord knows how he can say that as no repeat testing was done.
Long story short I've got a private consultation next week to get the ball rolling with an MOT for me.

@Theawkwardblonde that is awful. 🤞 you get some answers and it all goes well.

Hi all, wondering how everyone’s getting on as I feel like I need to hear from other people who get how shit this process is!
We had OH’s SA results back and the results have kind of knocked us for six. He’s producing no sperm at all. GP has referred him to oncology because based on his previous testicular cancer, that’s a likely culprit 😳. Slight silver lining is that the GP has tracked down his frozen sperm from 15 years ago so that’s a positive, but it’s quite low quality.
I’m kind of still in shock really and feeling totally numb about it, the news that we can’t conceive naturally was a big enough blow but the possibility of OH having cancer again is too much to even contemplate.
Hope everyone else is having a much better time and getting some positive news. Sorry for wallowing in self pity, but I’ve not told anyone in real life. Big love!

@BeachPeach wow no wonder you're in shock hun, that's a lot to take in! Glad he's being referred ASAP! I hope all goes well. Sounds like you'll need to speak to someone irl as well as it's quite major news. So much luck and best wishes to you both xx

@BeachPeach I'm so sorry, what a terrible shock for you both. I hope he gets seen by oncology very quickly. Please don't apologise for feeling self pity - struggling to conceive is bad enough, but you've got this on top now.

@Theawkwardblonde have you been for your private appointment?

I have my phone appointment with a Consultant from the fertility clinic just after new year. I was managing my MH reasonably until I got the news that DH's younger sibling is pregnant. I feel like a horrible person but I physically can't manage to see them atm. Thank god for tier 3 restrictions.