Feb Bus Pt 3

[Juno231]

@MimiArm
@paintfairy
@MrsTwentyEight

Figured I'm not ready to let you ladies go ☺️

@paintfairy aaah I see. That's pretty cool! Seeing as my scans will be at the hospital I guess there's a risk they don't have this fancy equipment even for the IVF. Did they tell you how many follicles you had at the scan last week? And I agree that long protocol sounds most sensible in your late 30s!

Ha I follow this woman on insta who had her egg retrieval on Sat and was upset they "only" harvested 12. I was a bit dumbfounded tbh, I'd be thrilled with 12!

@Juno231 I think about 10 on the right and 5 on the left. Main one was on the left. Obviously all follicles don't mature to eggs though. He seemed to think 10 would be a good number to get if we can.

@paintfairy 10 would be brilliant. You'd hopefully end up with one fresh and three to freeze then!

Here's hoping! @Juno231

So an update. Sigh. Getting to private clinic will be better they said. Yeah right. We've had loads of paperwork and online stuff to watch. Everything has been signed digitally. Failed at speaking to anyone since my consultant (i left voicemail and emailed). Finally got hold of them yesterday after ringing like 6 times to be told I had been signed off for this month. Drugs need to be started Saturday and have the drugs company been in touch yet. Nope? Finally heard from them this morning and earliest delivery was Monday in the online select thing, so I had to call them up. But they can get them to me on time. I hope. This is not the stress free experience I was looking for though. I feel like I've no idea what's going on at all. Initially I only need to inject buserelin but I hope to good someone is going to explain the rest of it to me after that!

@Juno231 @paintfairy

Hi both 👋🏻

We've went to an ROI private clinic as still waiting on call back from NI clinic (going on 7 weeks now?! They've clearly forgotten about us again).

I had an updated AMH test done 2 weeks ago and we have our consultation this coming Wednesday. Praying she says we can start IVF with ICSI ASAP but of course how I'm on CD60 with no period. Arghhh! At least it's some kind of progress (again). The clinic is 7 hours drive away (each way) but we don't even care at this point!!

How are you both? @paintfairy - wow - I can't believe you've started IVF! How do you feel? I'm sure you're nervous and anxious with the lack of info that it sounds like you've experienced.

@Juno231 - what's happening with you now? New job started? Ready to get back in the TTC train yet? x

@MimiArm I think they can give you something to bring on a bleed if you've funny cycles? So i wouldn't worry about that. 7 hours?! Flipping heck. I hope this one proves useful though! I'm wondering if any of them are really any good.
I've started my buserelin tonight. No one told me it hurts after! Yay. Absolutely weeks of this as you stay on it until the trigger. I thought the menopur stung so I'm hoping it doesn't as well. 🙄 So the plan is AF is due a week on Sunday/Monday (i have read this can delay it slightly). I call up on CD1. Go for a scan appropriately 7 days later. Then if they are happy, I start the stims (ovaleap and menopur). Then scan after 6 days i think it is, and then whatever they feel as to how you respond. Scary stuff. And it doesn't seem real yet. We only get one shot though so I'm just hoping we manage to collect eggs. Hinges on the medication being right i guess.

@paintfairy : how are the injections going now? Are you black and blue with bruises? I have my fingers and toes crossed for you that this works and that you get multiple embryos so you can freeze some.

@Juno231

I had my consultation today at the new clinic, and a scan. Latest AMH is 15 (it was 32 last year). Dr said that's still 5 above normal for my age so she's happy with it. Scan showed 6 follicles on right ovary and she can't find the left one (it's not in the correct place due to an op I had years ago on my bowel).

I've been prescribed drugs to induce a bleed m, starting this Friday. I then go back for scan on CD2 and to take Clomid again for 5 days. This time I'll go back CD12 for a scan, then I've to take trigger shot then Cyclogest pessaries. If it works, I'll also then take blood thinning injections. If it doesn't work, we are trying for a second month (upping Clomid dosage if needed).

If that doesn't work, then IVF will take place in January. Not sure what protocol it would be yet but she confirmed it would be a fresh transfer with a double embryo transfer because of my age.

I feel better now that I have a three month plan with effectively three attempts.

Only issue I've had today is trying to get the drugs! 2 of the 4 that she prescribed aren't available in UK so I've been trying to get a new script with alternatives 😩

@MimiArm oh FINALLY some flipping traction! I'm so glad for you! Amh is really good for your age as well still (mine is 20 at 33 and still considered within a normal range). What meds are you trying to get hold of? I would have assumed provera? If you end up on the IVF path we'll be looking at similar timelines 😊

@Juno231 Finally indeed! What a year of nothing.

The bottom two on the attached page aren't available here. Apparently the bottom one was discontinued in 2008. I've got the bottom one sorted now (clinic don't use provera - forget the name of the replacement I was told to get but it's been ordered already for me). The Gonasi isn't appearing on pharmacy drugs database to be able to order. I've asked the clinic if it can be replaced by ovidril or pregnyl as I think they are the same. Hopefully they reply back in time for my GP appointment tomorrow.

I've no idea how much these drugs will cost and highly doubt GP will issue me with NHS prescription.

@MimiArm no bruises as yet. But I got odd ones from the iui drugs, so it's only a matter of time!
I'm really pleased things are finally looking to be moving for you. It does seem ridiculous everything takes so long!

There's nothing attached? But i've got gonasi? So I don't think it's a strange drug?

D'oh - @paintfairy

That's strange as my local pharmacy said it wasn't on their system. Hopefully the clinic can offer up an alternative!

That's good you've no bruises. Any other side effects to report?

@MimiArm maybe local places don't stock it? I don't know. Mine came from a fertility drugs pharmacy specifically. I thought it might be new but I've just looked and it doesn't appear to have just come out or anything. I've never heard of the bottom one though.

I worked out its definitely better to use an ice pack before and after. Otherwise it goes red and itchy. I've had a couple of headaches but I'm not sure if it's that or coincidence. I keep having weird dreams though. 🤣 And I struggle to wake up in a morning. I'm irritable but I usually am heading towards AF. So that's possibly normal. I was really warm today though, even when it wasn't. Like clammy warm. But mostly OK really so far and it's not bad. I'm not looking forwards to when I have to inject 3 a night though!

@paintfairy It's strange. When she searched for it, it just wasn't there for her to order at all. She thought it might just be a different brand name so asked me to check. I guess I'll know tomorrow when the clinic reply. At least the pharmacist was helpful. She's ordered my progesterone to induce the bleed before I've even given her the actual NI converted script which was good of her.

It sounds like you're having a few symptoms for sure. I'm curious to find out from you how you feel when you get close to the egg collection stage. I've read lots on here about that part and so many women are uncomfortable come egg collection day.

If you have extra embryos, I know you say you get one round just but I take it you will be able to freeze embryos still? Have you been told if you will have a single or double transfer? I'm guessing single as over 40s generally get the double?

@MimiArm was she spelling it right? 🤣 It's the trigger though so there must be others?

I'm dreading egg collection, I'm not going to lie. 🤣 Yes as part of my 1 round I dry get all frozen transfers too (assuming we manage to freeze any). They haven't really mentioned anything about single/double but I suspect single as it's frowned upon them to do too many double. I think given the choice I'll choose single anyway- there's a lot of evidence now pointing to that being a better option. Yeah it might take longer but I think I would be happier with that.

@paintfairy : so I got the scripts changed from ROI to NI today. My GP was surprisingly helpful and even gave me NHS prescriptions for the lot so all free! (The last clinic were charging £950 per ovulation induction cycle?!) I think the NHS owes me so I'll gladly take it for free. Spoke to pharmacist as well and the silly cow yesterday was wrong - the Gonasi is able to be ordered in 🙄 so it's ordered now.

So do you mean if you have embryos to freeze, you'll get additional procedures to use up your frosties (if needed)? That's pretty good as it could effectively be multiple rounds really? I get that the medication needs to work just right to collect the eggs though, which is of course a stress.

It still astonishes me that you were referred after I was, and have had IUI x 2 and now IVF and I'm still 2 years away from NHS help (and therefore it will never happen as I would be over the age limit by then). It really is a postcode lottery!

@MimiArm oh that's fab that you have the meds sorted and for free! And yeah where paintfairy is she gets a full cycle which includes aaallll frosties - that bitch 😁🤭. I get one fresh and a frozen transfer but I shan't complain either after how tough your route has been! Madness that you've been messed about for so long.

@Juno231 @paintfairy Haha - it's madness how the NHS help is so drastically different in different places. Me to the NHS fertility in NI 🖕🏻🖕🏻

By the time the NI private clinic ever call me back, I'll probably have a baby in the Moses basket 😂😂😂 ... coming up to two months now. Thank god I searched further afield.

I forgot to say that the consultant yesterday told me that the Metformin improves egg quality so she was pleased that I've been taking it for 2 months already. Did not know that!

@MimiArm oh good! I'm pleased you got it sorted! As for the gonasi 🙄
Yes a 'round' technically refers to everything collected at egg collection being able to go back in. They say you need 3 for it to work (so imagine potentially how many transfers that could be?) so when they limit you right down you can see why it's such a slim chance it'll work. I'm lucky i get all frosties but realistically that should be the case everywhere. It does seem very unfair. And I've no idea why things are so bad where you are. @Juno231 is London and even that's not that bad! Its very frustrating.

So I've been to acupuncture again tonight. Hilariously she told me my contact at the ivf clinic is leaving, so that's helpful? No wonder she never answers the phone.
And I'm not spotting. Usually I would be by now. I don't know what that means? 🤷‍♀️

Baseline scan now booked for next Wednesday. God this all feels so slow! I'm sure it won't once stims start but up to now it has!

@paintfairy It will be all systems go now! Excited? Nervous? Keeping my fingers crossed for you 😊

I'm almost finished my week of bleed inducing tablets so I should be having my baseline scan (albeit for OII) within the next week (I would guess early next week). I'm not particularly excited or hopeful!

@MimiArm I'm refusing to think about it. In case the buserelin isn't working and my lining won't be doing what it should be. I just don't feel that hopeful about any of it. There's so many stages it can go wrong its ridiculous. Once you start reading others experiences it really is pretty depressing. So I'm just not expecting anything. I don't know if that's an ideal way to feel, but 🤷‍♀️

@paintfairy : I completely get where you are coming from. You think IVF makes it easier but actually, as you say, there are hurdles to cross at each step, BUT I think you have to believe that it will happen for you. If anything for your own sanity AND there's every chance it will happen for you. Provided you have at least one embryo, you have multiple chances so that's gotta be something positive to hang on to.

I get that you feel you can't be hopeful - heck, by this stage we are all half given up on this thread! I scrolled back one day and you can see the positivity and chat literally dwindling with each month (year?!) that passes.

@MimiArm I think it just comes to your attention that these things either work or they don't. Depending on your issue (which they don't always find out). With you- at least you know why and it's happened before, so I think it'll happen. Its just them getting it right for you. I'm confident ivf will work for you.
But for others (its a bit like the iui). You see women have 1 or attempts at iui and it works easily. Others have 7 goes and nothing. I think they could have 40 goes and it still won't work. Ivf seems similar. Some people it works first time, some takes a little longer but they do get something happening. Others could have 10 goes (there's people on an fb group i go on that have had to just stop and give up) and it just never works. Again, why, no one knows. You kind of assume they have more knowledge on it than they do.

But only now I'm starting have I realised about the stages. I just thought you do it- you put the embryo in and it either works or not. But actually I hadn't realised that even getting to that part is not a given!
The downreg might not work. In which case you have to start all over again or they change their plan. The stims might not work and you might have to cancel altogether or just go with it but only get like 2 eggs. The eggs might not fertilise, even with icsi. If they do, they might not develop properly. So if you have any to put back in Its a miracle right there. 🤣 You could also overestimulate and have to go to a freeze all.
The ideal is to obviously get a fresh and have a couple of good ones frozen as a fall back. But actually that's not a given at all.

So I think in my mind I've just shut it all off? I can't see past next Wednesday. If things are OK and we then start stims, I'll worry about the next section then. Its easier for my head to deal with. If I think about it all together I think I'd be an anxious wreck. Which I may well be by the end! 🤣 It still doesn't feel really that real at the moment either. And part of me i think will be terrified if it does work! 🤣🤣🤣 Can't win. 🙄

@paintfairy I get it, I really do. I thought the same as you before, but now I know all the stages you have to make it past. I may have got pregnant before, but my biggest problem (which could always result in the same end result) is that my eggs are old. Even if they can help me release one or two, there's a higher probability that those are bad eggs that will ultimately miscarry. We can't afford to pay £8000 for PGS testing so we will always have the gamble that there is more than 50% chance of another miscarriage. That fills me with terror as I can't imagine how I could cope with that again.

I too shit myself at the thought of it working. How will I cope with a baby? Have we been childless too long and are we too used to our time (not that we have much free time) to ourselves? Are we just not meant to be parents? So many questions that I think we all think about.

Your approach is best one - take it all on stages and see how you go. What else can you do? It's ok to feel a bit positive about it though! If you don't have hope, you're not left with much else 😊

@MimiArm yes I think about all of those things too! Maybe it's just not meant to be and would we even cope with such a big change in our lives, having lived doing what we want for the last how many years! But I do know people that have done it and they say you do.
The miscarriage rate in pregnancy is pretty high really. It just isn't spoken about. Useful programme on W channel tonight with Mylene Class actually. But it's your bodies way of getting rid of anything that isn't viable and it will happen to most people at some point, difficult as it is. So just because it happened once- doesn't mean there's something severely wrong. You would be very lucky not to encounter it, in fact. I completely get the old eggs thing though- same for me. Maybe they are past it. But if they are, there's nothing I can do about it. We can only try and see i guess. 🤷‍♀️ I don't think we will do more than the one round though. If it doesn't work, I'll accept it and move on I think.