Our first month ttc our first

[rosiej95]

As soon as AF disappears, which will be soon 🤞 me & my partner will be ttc :)
I've been keeping an eye on my cycles for a little while using the flo app & have been taking pregnacare.
Is there anything else we should know or do to help prepare ourselves? :)
Exited to go on this roller coaster of a journey & as no one knows of our plans would be lovely to hear off people ttc too :) xx

Hey @rosiej95 bless you! Sounds like you could do with a bit of downtime. Have a self care/pamper session! That always helps.

@rosieb060 you've definitely smashed it this month! 👏🏽👏🏽 I love autumn outfits too! All about the neutrals atm. Although, I'm a spring summer girl and the dark nights are not for me! Sun is shining here today so going to get out on a lunchtime walk!

I'm Wales so our lockdown is coming to an end soon 🙌🏽

@meganlea thanks doll, I hope I have if I've got the dates right. You've for sure covered it! Well done doll. I know what you mean.. it's SO hard to not think of it isn't it.

This is our 5th cycle. I honestly thought I'd be fully pregnant by now.. crazy isn't it xxx

@meganlea sounds that way!! Keeping everything super firmly crossed for you. What are your strategies for keeping calm and carrying on/ forgetting it all?

@rosiej95 thank you. It's feeling good to be honest!

Re lockdown ending- I am very very jealous! Xx

@rosiej95 Did you end up re testing or does it feel certainly like AF is on her way? You sound shattered babe hope you have lots of hot bubble baths and plenty of rest ready to go again in a few weeks.

@beckyBP It is so mental. I keep doing something in the house and then imagining having a little baby in the room and imaging what they'd be doing and what I'd be doing and how messy the house would be and it makes me want it so much more I'm trying not to think about it but I'll just be laid in bed on a morning like omg I want my little person laid with me watching tv in bed together on a weekend lol. Hopefully we'll all get that dream one day!!!

@rosieb060 right now I'm just throwing myself into work and uni, watching tv, reading, trying out new recipes at tea time, sorting Christmas gifts, just basically doing anything possible that's time consuming and that requires all my attention. I'm dying to just be like omg I really hope it happens all the time, symptom spotting etc but I feel like I'd jinx it if I said it out loud or googled what things mean I can be quite superstitious like that. So I'm not even going to speak my feelings about it out loud lol because it just makes me feel really sad thinking there's an 80% chance it won't happen this time!!!

@meganlea AF showed up yesterday 🙈😞 Onto a new month now..

@beckyBP yes! Totally thought it would of happened by now. Hopefully we're not waiting to much longer 🤞

Natural cycles miscalauted my ovulation by three days this month.

If I had been relying on it as a cue to DTD, I'd have missed my window completely!

Sorry to hear @rosiej95

Hey loves! Happy Fri-yay!

@meganlea I totally know what you mean but in a way it's good to picture a baby there as that's how manifesting works! So keep on girl. We fore sure all will ❤️

@rosiej95 sorry AF arrived. It's tough when it first comes isn't it. How are you feeling?

@rosieb060 crazy! It's so annoying. I for sure thing apps can't be fully relied on!

How is everyone??

I've just got a new job so will be starting that in a months time(ish). My mum asked (no insinuation or judgment) if we're going to put ttc on hold for maternity leave reasons but I just can't. This journey has proved to me it's not easy to conceive and I wouldn't want to miss a month that was potentially my month purely because my mat pay would be better. What do you guys think? Xx

@rosiej95 hope you’re okay!! What a shit month 😔. Plenty of self care girl. Have an alcoholic beverage and enjoy it while you can.

@beckyBP first of all, congrats on the new job!! That’s amazing news!! And good news come in 3s so who knows 😛. If you’d be okay financially without the better pay, then just go for it! Hopefully it won’t, but you don’t know how this could go on for so you might as well so give you’re all to TTC every month still. After all, what’s a bit of extra money over a precious life?

I’m feeling okay today, couldn’t sleep last night though, awake for hours and I didn’t even feel tired! I'm shattered today though, think it’s anxiety tbh about the 2ww. I’m 3DPO now and just want to fast forward the next 11 days to see if AF comes or not.

@beckyBP it's a bit rubbish but just spurs me on for next month. 😀

Congratulations on the new job 🎉

Have you looked into what they offer for maternity? I'm self employed so don't know to much about it but I'm sure some company's do smp anyway & if that's the case there's no point putting it on hold? 🙂

Hi girls - hope you’re all keeping well ♥️ I’ve still been here, lurking with not much to report!

I’m just jumping in because I’m in a really similar boat @beckyBP - I got offered a new job about 4 weeks ago but it’s civil service so with all the checks etc it could look like Jan before I start. We’ve talked and talked because our situation is:

Preg now/before jan: Maternity allowance at best (£151 a week for 39 weeks)
Preg after starting but within 4 months: 90% pay for 3 months, £151 a week for 6 months
Stop ttc and preg after 4 months of start date: 100% pay for 6 months, £151 a week for 3 months

I’d take the year and spread the pay over 12 months so the above would pay out £453 a month, £690 a month or £1000 a month respectively.

Initially we said we’d wait for the big mat pay but then we I discovered how long it would take we decided just to make sure I wasn’t preg before I started so we could get the middle one.. which means missing out at least this month, Dec and Jan. So I’m not tracking or anything but I know I’m approaching my fw and now my head is making me question everything 🙈

Plus I had a chemical in Sept and they say the cycle after your first proper period (so right now) you have a higher chance of conceiving and I’m not sure I’m okay with missing that chance. This all probably didn’t help you at all, but I just thought I’d say I’m in a similar boat and it’s nice to know I’m not alone haha xx

@meganlea thanks so much hun. I think my opinion is the same. I'd rather start my mum journey with a little less money and we'll definitely be ok with my fiancé's pay.

Oh gosh I'm about the same dpo as you. Really hope this TWW is a quick one!

@rosiej95 thank you doll. It's with the council so mat pay is good with them but.. I just think I'll look back like 'what it that was my month' if I don't try.

Lush to see you pop up @Amy259 huge congratulations on the job. As I say, we're in very similar positions as mine is council. I know this isn't the answer you are probably looking for and there is no right or wrong answer but you have to follow your heart as a couple. We just decided we don't want to put it off and if I'm on a less money for mat leave, so be it. Its not an easy decision at all but you just have to follow your heart. Xx

@beckyBP that sounds really similar to our situation. My DH is really money conscious so he’s much better at detaching himself from the emotional side of it and thinking more logically... but would also be delighted if we did fall preg sooner, he’d just rather have both, with the financial security too haha.

Thank you for that ♥️ I think my plan is to continue with not tracking for a couple of months, not timing dtd like I did before, but also not preventing. It’ll be lovely to take time away from scheduled dtd to be fair! And what’s meant to be will be!! Xx

Are we all government workers I work for the council too haha!

@Amy259 I think that's the best thing to do for sure and if you have a lovely little surprise in the meantime you'll make it work!!

How funny @meganlea I'm new to the industry.. bit of a job change for me xx

@beckyBP for sure!!

@meganlea I’m new to it all too - mine isn’t council/local authority, but gov all the same. The perks are insane (especially the 6 month full pay mat leave!) compared to any job I’ve had before!

Yes to the perks! Literally pay, holiday allowance, hours, mat leave, pension.. all so much better than my current job (which is actually going to be made redundant anyway)

So excited to start! Xx

My partner is exactly the same We were originally going to start ttc in March then lockdown hit! & he wanted to put it on hold :/ because I've been wanting to ttc for the past few years I was gutted. It's so hard not to get to emotional when it's litrally something you want so bad. 🙈

@Amy259 congratulations on your new job too 🎉 🙂

I'm a hairdresser 🙋🏼‍♀️😂

Hi girls

How are you all?

I am completely new to this and hope you don’t mind me jumping on this thread! I have had a read through a few and thought this was one was probably most relevant to me!

We were due to get married next year but that is now all up in the air so we have made the decision to TTC earlier than originally planned!

I came off of my contraception on 30/10 and now waiting for my first real AF to arrive.

Look forward to chatting to you all you girls x

@Amy259 @beckyBP yess definitely I re joined my local authority 3 years ago now you just know you're going to be looked after. Which is all you want especially when starting a family!

Is anyone a member of those TTC groups on FB? I'm a member of 2 and they both have over 20k plus members. There's fertility psychics on there too and, maybe quite foolish of me because I'm very skeptical of people like this, but I've just paid £15 for someone called Gemma Barr to give me a reading. She said 48 hours and it's been 48 hours now so I'm hoping to have it through today. She's supposed to predict your conception month, Important numbers, Spiritual signs, likelihood of twins and fertility guidance. Might be a load of bull but it's only what I'd have spent on a takeaway and there's always someone posting saying she got their prediction right.

6DPO today. TBF the way I calculated my first DPO I could be between 6-8DPO today. Not going to test though, I'm just going to hold out and see if AF turns up I think. Part of me really doesn't want to test because my anxiety is like omg what if you're pregnant, and then it's also like, OMG what if you're not? So if I don't test I won't have to deal with that just yet ha.

@Em201 Welcome! Good luck on your journey xx

@meganlea I’m a member of the one my app recommends, which was great at first because I wasn’t sure how to do certain things but loads of people had asked the questions I wanted to know. But I’ve hidden them now because seeing it on my feed all the time added to my obsession and all the people getting bfps at 8dpo (which is so rare!) was hard to see each month.

But I have been SO tempted with the psychic thing too!! I’ve never done anything like that before, I think I was just getting so impatient that I wanted to give it a try. But I never found anyone good, so let me know how you get on. I was put off a couple by the “special months” thing because they didn’t give any indication to what was special about them - I felt like was like a star sign, where you could probably twist anything to be relevant to you? Because a special month could be conception, bfp, first scan, gender, birth.. so they’d probably always get it “right”? But that didn’t stop me from being very tempted though 😂

Yeah I joined a few weeks ago and I'm already getting really fed up with them. Too many people testing dead early and posting asking for 'line eyes' and when there's clearly nothing there but people are like I see it!! ...no you don't, stop getting someones hopes up.

I know exactly what you mean, I think the same! It could apply to anything. But I'll let you know my experience, I feel like they're just con artists preying on vulnerable women that are struggling but I want to be proven wrong sooo badly haha. I'm barely over my first cycle and I've paid for this I'm just not very patient with anything!!

Thanks @meganlea

How far into your journey are you?

Has anyone else been on the mini-pill for a while? I keep reading stories of it taking ages to become regular again but I think I’m focusing on the bad rather than the good as it’s not the same for everyone.

I promised myself I wouldn’t get too hung up on all of this to begin with and just ‘go with the flow’ for a few months but it’s so hard what with having access to google 24/7! x

@meganlea oh god the “line eyes”... give it a rest!! 😂😂

@Em201 welcome! Sorry, I can’t help with the mini pill question but yes google will send you mental!! If it’s any consolation I think by the time I was my second cycle into this I had googled just about everything on the planet related to ttc... so once I hit that level, I stopped because there was nothing new to google 😂

@Em201
I'm on my first cycle and in my 2 week wait after ovulation now so I'm 6DPO.....super nervous!

I was on the pill from age 17-22 I was having shooting pains whilst I was breathing so I came off the pill completely 2 years ago for my health and had a 'withdrawal bleed' 36 days after stopping the pill, then it was another 76 days before I had a real period and from then on my cycles have been between 30-45 days but I'm not sure if the pill messed me up or it's because I'm a bit of a stress head but I feel like my long cycles are very out of the ordinary so I wouldn't worry too much my sisters when they came off the pill had their periods come back like clockwork every 4 weeks. The pills I have been on are yasmin and co-cyprindiol.
It's so easy to just get quickly roped into everything!!