Oreo 🍫 , 🍷 , puffy sex & BFPs by snaccident #dirtydozen

[SmileyT]

Have you seen our guide to getting pregnant?🤣

1. Lots of sex (every other day to catch) or SMEP or just Banging OH to death seems to work for some - For the same sex couples out there; Insemination using a cup (easily available on Amazon) Bum up after the goods are deposited... don’t leave it in the cup for ages before you put it in ✌🏾

1. Relaxing & lots of patience

1. Prenatal vitamins e.g Pregnacare, COQ10, Primrose oil, B6, B12, Calc Flour, Folic acid/Folate, Magnesium, Vit C (will have to do your research on amounts/when to take these)

1. Conceive plus/preseed - if you haven’t had enough assfruit juice and you aren’t moister than an 🦪 💦

1. Seed cycling - make sure you ground them up

1. Grapefruit juice (ass juice) for EWCM - CM should be stretchy sometimes hard to tell the difference between cum if you get loads of action.

7.OPKS/CB Digital ovulation kits 😂 A lot of us seem to like fermometer to record the OPK peaks

1. It will happen when it's meant to but not necessarily the month you want it to 😩

9.Wine, pizza, oreo choc and pouffe sex

10.Relax, dont be stressed, take bbt, dont take bbt, dont obsess, obsess, exercise, don't exercise too much, loose weight, don't loose too much weight, eat healthy, don't let it consume you and eat what you want apart from too much alcohol, caffeine, cigs obvs

11.PMS/ early pregnancy symptoms are the same and the progesterone likes to trick you.

And most of all it isn’t your fault, blame corona for all BFN

@Missgoldilocks nope never ' normally like clockwork every 28-30 days ! Xx

@lucyrp that's sooooooo weird!!!??? I god you must be so annoyed understandably too! Hope you get answers soon!! Do you feel pregnant? Was you on contraception before recently?

@Missgoldilocks I know ! I was on the depo injection until June last year when I had my last shot but my period went back to regular at Christmas so the doctor has said it's probably unlikely that's anytning to do with it and no not pregnant 😂😭 I had a faint positive at 18dpo and negatives since

Hi everyone! Thing I'm most annoyed about today is that they've found a new star sign, and as a result they've changed all the dates to squeeze it in!
So after 32 of Aries I'm now a bloody Pisces?!

@SarahTTC2020 what!!!! How’s that even possible? What is that new star sign?!

@SarahTTC2020 OMG no! I am an Aries! None of this Pisces shit! (soz pisces girl, I just want to be an Aries still) 😂

@SarahTTC2020 they can go and shite 😂

@vil10 you can put it in up to 15 min before but that's if you want to. Reason some of us do it is so you don't just whip it out during foreplay and start inserting applicators in front of OH as it's perhaps not the sexiest.

@lucyrp they might give insight with thyroid though? Or iron levels but I bet your frustrations it's not really what you want to know. At least you can cross those things off though x

@Missgoldilocks that's great that all your tests came back clear though I'm sure you'll get your BFP before jan! Sounds like it was worth the money for a full MoT and to put your mind at rest x

@SarahTTC2020 yeah I mentioned that star sign thing a few threads ago it's changed mine too which seems odd! How can they just change it! X

So CD119 (am I the high scorer?) and bloods finally back from GP. Everything apparently normal- blood sugars, thyroid, hormone levels, androgens (although testosterone on the highest edge of normal). Shes going to refer to gynaecology and said "they might be pedantic and reject till month 6 but may as well give it a go cause they'll stick you on a wait list for months anyways".

So... all good, but no answers, but movement forwards I guess...

Now, lunch - yum yum yum

@2020mission sorry to hear you're feeling so crappy. Your body isn't a failure but I know most of us feel like that at some point. I still blame the lack of educating people on how hard getting pregnant can be, its drummed into you from a young age if you have unprotected sex you'll get pregnant. So when youre older and wanting to get pregnant you think there's something wrong with you when it doesnt happen so easily! I was watching a YouTube video this morning and it was about the sperms journey and it started off with about 3milliom sperm and by the time they got to the egg it was down to only a few dozen as theres so many obstacles to overcome. Its no wonder getting pregnant is so difficult! I'll try find the link it's just a short clip.

@lucyrp hope you're feeling OK after putting the baby stuff in the attic. Good news on the lower levels finally hopefully that means AF will come soon and let you start trying again!

@Missgoldilocks glad to hear you got the all clear, hoping the test has given you a wee extra fertility boost for this month!

I cant remember who was asking about the OPK strips, I just changed to the easy at home ones this cycle instead of one step and I find they give far clearer results for me and were nice wide strips. Think it was about £5 for a box of 25 on amazon.
I've only tried the CB digital ones the past 2 cycles but I found both times the static smiley didn't tie in with the peak on the cheap ones nor with the temperature rise. CB always picked up first but if i only went with that and stopped trying 48hours later I could have been missing out on a few extra vital days! It may be that I get multiple peaks or might have a slow rise peak who knows but thought I should mention it if youre only using CB bear that in mind and keep having sex for a good 4/5 days after you get a static just incase the same happens with you if you're not tracking wjth anything else.

Hi, I only read until 10 this morning, ... trying to catch up.

Ds is in his school meeting the teacher, for September, it's only a couple of hours so I went for a walk, so here I am, sitting by the river, reading with you lot for company.

Thats the clip I was watching. When you think thats with spot on timing, good health, good conditions, good quality sperm and egg and its still only a few sperm get to the goal its no wonder getting pregnant is so difficult at times. A lot of it really does just seem to be down to luck and we're so hard on ourselves that we've not done something we should have or not eaten something at the right time! Tho I'm still all for the medicinal oreos and pizza to go alongside the luck 😂

Hey @Missgoldilocks welcome bk!! So glad to hear everything is fine and it's just a waiting game. Hoping this is what I get as well! I'm due to call docs next month as I'll be cycle 12 by end of the month and month 11 in August so gonna start on the tests too. 1dpo today so nothing to report from me. Good to have you back! 🙂
@SarahTTC2020 yay I'm still a Pisces! We're great btw so you'll love being one 😉
@Cocoblue22 apparently they've found a new planet so it's shifted everything!
@DKDK123 is that the great sperm Journey one? I'm still to watch that. Want to get Dh to watch it too!

@DKDK123 ah just seen it isn't. This one is more likely to keep Dh's attention only being 5 mins. The great sperm journey is an hour long! 😳

@notyetamumbuttrying I've posted the link above, its just a short clip one. I think the one you mentioned may have been the one I was looking for this morn. I just remembered ages ago watching something (much longer than the one I found) and being fascinaged by it. I was trying to find it to show my hubby and couldn't remember what it was called but this one is similar tho not in as mucb depth.

Think I've got gremlins in my phone, it's been doing some interest autocorrects and made up spellings lately! 🙈

Hey @Missgoldilocks glad you are back and all is good!! That's Amazing, now, it's funny you should come back when you have, have your read the thread, we were talking about bum sex yesterday, & I'm pretty sure your nickname from the cringed sex story thread was @shitsondicks right??? So I guess we know where you stand on that one?!!

@SarahTTC2020 WTAF?? Fuck off. I'm sorry some knobhead astrologer got drunk in lockdown & invented that & has decided to see how many ppl will take them seriously. Ophicus sounds like the noise you make when DH/OH tried bum sex & you don't want it ...."er get OFFITCOZ there might be Oreos left in the tunnel!" Nope I'm not changing my star sign to Gemini thanks.

@DKDK123 that's incredible... But no frigging wonder I'm not preggerz yet, that's a mission those poor spermies!!!

I'm still a pisces... Just!!!!

@LV1987 yay fellow piscean! 😃 you must be exactly a year younger than me then as I see your dob.
@DKDK123 oh looks like we posted at the same time lol!

@Minster2012 haha I don't blame you not wanting to be a Gemini, they don't have a good rep 😂

@DKDK123 that's an eye opener!! Thank you!

@Minster2012 haha yes we all know I love a bit of bum fun!! Haven't had in in about a year though don't want to lose any spermies going the wrong way 😂😂

@notyetamumbuttrying heyyy! Ah glad you can get the ball rolling soon, it's nice to know it is some peace of mind. I know some people with unexplained fertility have to go for ivf so we are ready for that option if it happens now. Hope everything is fine with you though and you won't get too far with the tests before you fall!! Xz

@blodyn91 I'm with you. I am a Pisces girl but this new one would suggest I'm an Aquarius 😩 nope. I choose to ignore this and I am a Pisces still puts foot down firmly lol.... I don't understand how they can just add another one!!!

I'm so sorry so many people are having a rough time mentally right now. I get the need to take a step back @2020mission, I personally had to found it helpful so will continue to do so as needed. Keep your chin up - we will get there 💕

Less Gemini bashing ladies please! 🤣 x

Okay seriously @DKDK123, that video is blowing my mind. How does ANYONE get pregnant, never mind me and my issues?! 🙉

Yeah, I'm with @Cocoblue22! I'm a Gemini and my horoscope pretty much always says some variant of "spirited, stubborn and fickle"