TTC 12 months buddies please

[Whilstwewait]

Hi,

We have just hit the 12 month mark of TTC and looks like AF is on the way I am on another thread that's really supportive but I do find it disheartening when people get positives on the first couple of cycles of trying. So thought I'd start a thread for anyone around about the year mark. It'll be good to share things and get advice from people who are at a similar stage to me. Im 34 and my husbands 36. We are TTC number 1 x

@Whilstwewait I'm not sure how I feel about it all really. 🙁 Yeah possibly, there was just a few maybes in the appointment so it'll be interesting to see what my doctor says. Once the surgery has received the scan, they will send them to the fertility clinic with everything else. Hmmm yeah. Did you have polyps? x

Sorry to hear about the results @claireb707 definitely ask the dr for the results so you can see the amounts. My acupuncturist gave me information on improving sperm with diet and supplements I’ll attach it, don’t know how good it is.

Also I am so confused this cycle. I got a positive opk on Sunday CD11 I had lots of ovulation pain Monday CD12 and ewcm but my temps haven’t increased. Had a really restless nights sleep but surely that couldn’t have that much effect, it’s hasn’t risen at all.

Hi guys! Looks like I’m joining this crew! I’m nearly 24 months off contraception, 12th cycle of periods etc but my doctor doesn’t think I’m ovulating (this was via telephone call!)

I’ve read this ENTIRE thread and a lot of woman believe their age is letting them down! I’m 24 and I’m in the same boat so please don’t beat yourself for waiting. Looking forward to this journey, nervous but hopeful for some answers (finally)

Rang docs and am a lot happier now. Still don't know numbers for partners SA as she wouldn't give them to me but we have progress.
She has added a few more tests to his blood tests on the 11th, she is sending us some forms to fill in and once she has his blood results she will send off the referral asap.

They have everything they need from me, just his bloods and then we are referred.

@claireb707 I'm glad the call reassured you! The 11th really isn't far away, it sounds like forever but the way this year is going you'll blink and it will be here.

@Jilly1988 thanks for sharing the info! I've copied it in case we need it. Might start sneaking some more seeds into DH's dinners before the results come back anyway haha. Do you have a graph you could post on here and maybe one of us could see what we think? It sounds like it was an early failed O attempt and you will ovulate a bit later - how long are your cycles normally?

@Fran2020 the positives if they have found something is then they know what needs to be fixed. Hope it doesn't take long to hear back from the docs!

I'm 11dpo today and no sign of spotting yet. I've had cramps since about 8dpo, so I've worn white pants today as that's a surefire way to make spotting start if it's going to happen looking back my spotting mostly starts at 10dpo but has also started at 12dpo so I'm still not out yet.

Hi everyone, I am 13dpo today, no spotting yet but my boobs are now less tender so I'm expecting AF on time on Friday, another cycle bites the dust! Hope others have better luck this cycle.

@Motherofkittens28 have you decided you're out just because of the tenderness decreasing? Have you POAS yet?

@claireb707 frustrating they wouldn't give your the actual figure but glad they are adding more tests to the bloods and referring you xx

I don't know what is happening with me this cycle 😂
I got positive opk on sunday (both cheapie and cbd solid smiley). No ewcm and not temp rise.
Got another peak cheapie yesterday and this morning (darkest one yet this morning). Still no temp rise though but did have hint of ewcm this morning). So guessing no egg was released after first peak and it's trying again now.

@PlanBea, just because of the tenderness decreasing, i figure that if I was pregnant then the progesterone would stay high and the tenderness would still be present. I haven't POAS, I find getting a BNF too upsetting so I've decided that I wont test unless my period is late in future.

My fiance has his NHS SA on 3 September, the Dr has said he will refer us to the sub fertility clinic once the results are back. We did a private SA a few months ago and were told that it was fine but we need to follow the NHS process to get referred.

@claireb707 this is why I don't bother with OPKs, they make things more confusing! Hopefully this means you're about to ovulate now!

@Motherofkittens28 I totally get you! I'm so optimistic for other people then super pessimist for myself. I think tenderness can subside when progesterone gets above a certain amount so I wouldn't rule you out yet (though it is easier to deal with AF if you've already decided she's happening). Hope the SA goes ok. DH missed the pot a bit so I'm thinking ours might need to be repeated. Hoping results don't take too long as they say it's at least 6 weeks for the next appointment and no fertility referral until after SA is back

@PlanBea fingers crossed results come back quickly! I don't know how long the wait is at our sub fertility clinic, it makes me quite scared to think after waiting 6 weeks for the SA appointment we will have to wait a few months or more to even be seen. I'll be 39 in 5 months and its terrifying to think of our chances slipping away with every cycle that passes. Suddenly just feeling super low about it all and wondering if we should start private IVF now. If it wasn't for our wedding i would probably already be thinking about doing that. Its so hard to know what to do

@Motherofkittens28 personally, I'd see what the SA comes back as and then look at your options. If SA is fine, then it might be worth trying natural while waiting for fertility clinic. If it comes back as a bad result then that might change things. You're expecting a positive result, and the hoops to get on the fertility waiting list might mean it's not as long as you think for an appointment.

Hi all, can I join? Seems like the right thread for me!

TTC 14 months but nearly 20 cycles. Had all the tests done and husband has very low count and low morphology. He has had 2 SAs now and 1st also showed low motility but 2nd it went up to normal range 🙌🏼 count also increased but still only 4 million/ml. Now he's been sent for karyotyping to check for genetic issues and we have been told they will refer for IVF at our next appointment.

Hi @Annny27 👋🏼

Hi @claireb707 we were on a thread together end of last year. Sorry to hear you have the same issue. We got the diagnosis back in February and I had a proper breakdown over it. In a much better place now so it does get easier. My husband has dealt with it pretty well (unless he's just hiding it).

@Narwhal88

Hi all, can I join? Seems like the right thread for me!

TTC 14 months but nearly 20 cycles. Had all the tests done and husband has very low count and low morphology. He has had 2 SAs now and 1st also showed low motility but 2nd it went up to normal range 🙌🏼 count also increased but still only 4 million/ml. Now he's been sent for karyotyping to check for genetic issues and we have been told they will refer for IVF at our next appointment.

Hi @Annny27 👋🏼

Hi @claireb707 we were on a thread together end of last year. Sorry to hear you have the same issue. We got the diagnosis back in February and I had a proper breakdown over it. In a much better place now so it does get easier. My husband has dealt with it pretty well (unless he's just hiding it).

👋

Yeah its hard for the guys in this situation (though it's hard for us too). My partner doesn't really talk about his feelings but he just kept apologising yesterday, made my heart break for him 😢

He's even said he is going to tel his parents the situation even though we had previously agreed to not tell anyone we were trying and he is ok for me to tell mine the same so I think he is feeling ok about it. It's not like he could have done anything about it (assuming it is related to his undescended testicles)

@claireb707 yeah it must be hard them knowing they are the issue. My husband was almost disappointed I think that they found nothing wrong with me so he felt all the 'blame' was on him. I did tell him that it isn't his fault and it is what it is. I sometimes feel I have to hide my sadness though as I don't want him to feel bad. Which is what caused me to have a breakdown as I bottled it up for a bit. He had said he didn't want anyone to know about our issues but he did then tell his parents in his own time as well. My mum knows but not my dad (as he cannot keep a secret and it would spread to my entire extended family).

Just need to vent to those who are in same boat....Just got a message from a friend after I shared some pictures with babies (the 12 stages of your work day) that she's recently had a miscarriage. I feel so awful to have upset her but I didn't know. however I feel like a terrible person as I feel so upset myself that she's at least able to get pregnant. I don't envy her the loss at all and really feel for her but I envy that she can actually fall pregnant and i hate myself for it. I thought I was doing ok but I'm really struggling, I work on a baby unit and 2 colleagues have fallen pregnant accidentally in the last few months. I'm expecting resistance with any tests and interventions due to covid, only being 33 and only trying a year but there's endometriosis for evey female member on my mam's side, my sister had terrible pcos. I feel so hopeless right now.

@kerrym87 don't worry, we totally understand the complicated feelings involved when you've been TTC for so long. It's so hard when someone got one further rung up the ladder, and your vision does get skewed. Every pregnancy announcement feels like a reminder that yours isn't coming, and it starts off a whole new phase of grief. You're not a terrible person, you're just dealing with an unfair thing that has no easy fix and you're constantly being reminded about.

Do you have any PCOS/endo symptoms? I had a cyst when I was in my teens and so when I started getting pain I was referred quickly even though I wasn't ttc. And there's quite a few of us here who are now being referred to fertility after the covid pause. It's slow but it's happening. Please speak to your GP, they'll be able to start the process or bloods and SA and you'll be more informed.

@Narwhal88 @claireb707 it's so hard for the men in this as fertility is seen so much as a women's issue, even though a third of cases are because of male factor (a third female factor, a third mixed/unknown). There's so much support on sites like this, so many books, do much info. I don't think I've come across many "beef up your sperm, boys!" Type books but there's loads of "how to make your eggs better!" Books. I hope your DH understands your grief is with the process and not with him. It's such an unfair journey

@kerrym87 I do understand what you mean. Obviously a miscarriage is awful and recurrent miscarriage is a form of infertility and I wouldn't wish it onto anyone. I know sometimes you can have one and then go on to struggle but hopefully for her it's a one off and she will then go on to conceive again. It's still horrible but it's a different kind of pain. I can't even get to the stage of seeing 2 lines. Infertility is years of pain. I think it's natural to feel a bit jealous that someone has managed to get pregnant.

@kerrym87 it’s ok you are definitely in the right place. Get so annoyed for silly reasons. A pregnant woman walked past and I said to my husband ‘oh well look at her flaunting her fertility’ I have started listening to the podcast BFN and it’s making me laugh as I think we all feel the same going through this.

So I am on 3dpo and CD15 my temps slightly increased .2 this morning so at least that is something. Though I’ve started spotting slightly. I have had spotting 3 days after ovulation quite a few times and every time I ring the GP they do not help at all, just say nothing to worry about. How many day 21 blood tests have you had? I had one last November when I had mid cycle bleeding but haven’t had one since and was never offered day 3. Do you think I could ring the GP and just ask for both blood tests as I am feeling so fed up today. Always seems to be something else each month.

@Jilly1988 I've had three, the first was negative, and should have been referred after the second but it fell through the cracks with moving house then Covid. Might be worth approaching your GP with "I'm worried I may have an issue like fibroids as I keep spotting through my cycle" as they seem much more keen to treat illness than infertility.

I'm on 12dpo and no sign of any spotting for me yet. The TWW is killing me!

Spotting just started for me, AF due tomorrow so bang on time really. Another cycle bites the dust! Wish I could eat something really naughty but I'm dieting so all comfort food is off limits