ttc after mc July/August 2007 - shiny new thread as the other was full

[winemakesmummyclever]

Hi,

I hope nobody minds me adding a new thread, but the other wouldn't let me reply.

LadyLush - Sorry to hear about your loss . In answer to your question, I thought I was around 11-12 weeks pg, but the scan said the baby was around 8-9 weeks. When I'd had the ERPC, the gynae reg said the uterus was around 14weeks and the baby was still 8-9 weeks.
I'm sure things do get better with time, but things are still pretty raw and new for me. I'm glad things are getting back to normal for you (and hopefully for others too).

KD73 : Waiting, ttc1, m/c 05/08 @ 9+6wks
Ronshar: CD2, ttc#3, m/c march
Wheelybug CD4 (I think), ttc2, mc July06 at 6-7 weeks
Ladylush CD4 ttc#2, mmc July O7
Sweetkitty: CD6, ttc#3, mc 11th August (10 weeks)
Jess1996: CD11, ttc1, mmc 22nd Feb, ep 3rd Aug
Triggles: CD12, poss O on CD12 (hope so anyway), ttc 4, mc May (6 wks) and August (10 wks)
KashaSarrasin CD14, ttc#2 (DS 27months), mc Aug 07 at 9 weeks.
nh101 CD6 ttc1, mMC March 07 at 13 (10 )weeks
Goingfor3:cd18, ttc#3, mc July at 16 weeks, finally ov'd!
Flosspot: CD19, ttc1, Clomid, mc June (6 weeks)
Kensgirl: CD21, ttc1, MMC/PMP at 11+4 in Dec 06T
Lcy: CD23, ttc1, mc D&C 20th August (10 1/2 weeks)
TJuice: CD26, ttc1, mc August (9 1/2 weeks)
Gillydaffodil: CD27, ttc1, MMC Oct 06 (9 wks)
WMMC - CD15, tt#2 (DS 17m), MMC/ERPC August 28th (?11/?14 weeks)

There's lots of us isn' there? My temp went back up this morning so maybe I have OV'd after all. Here's hoping!

KD73 : Waiting, ttc1, m/c 05/08 @ 9+6wks
Ronshar: CD2, ttc#3, m/c march
Wheelybug CD4 (I think), ttc2, mc July06 at 6-7 weeks
Ladylush CD4 ttc#2, mmc July O7
Sweetkitty: CD6, ttc#3, mc 11th August (10 weeks)
Jess1996: CD11, ttc1, mmc 22nd Feb, ep 3rd Aug
Triggles: CD12, poss O on CD12 (hope so anyway), ttc 4, mc May (6 wks) and August (10 wks)
KashaSarrasin CD14, ttc#2 (DS 27months), mc Aug 07 at 9 weeks.
WMMC - CD15, tt#2 (DS 17m), MMC/ERPC August 28th (?11/?14 weeks)
nh101 CD16 ttc1, mMC March 07 at 13 (10) weeks
Goingfor3:cd18, ttc#3, mc July at 16 weeks, finally ov'd!
Flosspot: CD19, ttc1, Clomid, mc June (6 weeks)
Kensgirl: CD21, ttc1, MMC/PMP at 11+4 in Dec 06T
Lcy: CD23, ttc1, mc D&C 20th August (10 1/2 weeks)
TJuice: CD26, ttc1, mc August (9 1/2 weeks)
Gillydaffodil: CD27, ttc1, MMC Oct 06 (9 wks)

sorry - I'm on cd16 not 6!

My friend was in for a scan yesterday and has lost her baby. She was 11 and a half weeks - don't know how big the baby was. She had been bleeding for eight days (they said the couldn't scan her any quicker - how bad is that?).

Now they have just sent her away, said she probably won't need surgery and told her to come back next week. I had D&C so don't understand this. Are they expecting her to go home and deal with it on her own - and let her body do its own thing? What advice can I give her?

nh101 - so sorry to hear about your friend. Did the hospital not give her a telephone number to contact if she's worried about bleeding etc.? My hospital has and yesterday they emphasised again that I could contact them 24/7 if I had any worries at all. I must admit I feel better knowing that I can call if I need reassurance, although emotionally it's not great to have to deal with it on your own. I was also given the number for a nurse counsellor but haven't felt the need to call yet.
I guess because the mc has already started in your friend's case then they are letting nature take its course. Has she been offered another scan? I have another scan in two weeks where they will check that everything has gone. If not, then it's the ERPC for me. I'm not a doctor though and others on the thread may have other suggestions for your friend.

Good morning, I guess I cannot yet add my name to the role call since I am in the "process..."

ILTS, girly, I was so shocked to read this morning that you had to be rushed to the hospital. Now that I think about it - I should have asked if you felt ok with all the blood loss that you were describing... Now it does seem to be a bit over the top. I was just so happy for you that the process was under way and progressing as you hoped that I didn't really think to ask about if it was "according to plan" or if you should have been seen! I am SO glad to hear that you're recovering now and from what it seems, the worst is over for you.

I have my rescan today. I don't even think about it as a rescan - no doubt in my mind that the baby is long gone. I have been bleeding, not excessively but pretty constantly. Nothing major to report yet. Yesterday mid day cramps got to be pretty uncomfortable. So I took some Tylenol. Again were cramping rather badly this morning, took more meds. So will see... At this point I don't even know what I hope for - natural or D&C... I guess I could also ask about the pill... I am in USA - they do it here too, right?

I am just a bit emotionally drained and feel like I am ready for this whole thing to be over. DH has been great but like some of yours - doesn't say much about it... guess doesn't know what to say. Just asked several times this morning to call him after my doc's visit. He'd love to go with me but had to take our DS to daycare, etc.

I'll let you know what I find out from my doc today.

Good luck to all of you, girls and hope you're just days away from jumping off this thread to "TTC graduates"

nh101, my post crossed with yours (came a bit later) but I didn't see yours until I posted. So didn't want to come across as insensitive, being all about me, and nothing to help out your friend...

I too was shocked that when during my first scan, when they didn't find heartbeat, they didn't offer to "take care of things" right on the spot but rather sent me home. It's been a week and I only started bleeding over the weekend.

I have my follow up appt today. But back to your friend - are you worried more about her emotional well-being (having to WAIT for everything to happen, prolonging the process) or physical well-being (losing blood, etc)?

I am sure it is both but I think suggestions might differ a bit depending on where you want to put the emphasis. If emotionally - I'd stay in close contact with her and if she really doesn't do well, see if the doctor can take her in and go the medical route.

If physically, then I'd say don't wait and have her go back/ go to the hospital. Blood loss can be dangerous, and if she is in pain - more so.

Good luck to her!

I'm just in from town getting a new duvet as we have washed, tossed, and turned ours to shreds.

ILTS - My face is just burning, honey my heart absolutely goes out to you. I very vividly remember passing the sac too. That was for sure physically the worst of it for me. The contractions stopped after that and I was a bit more mobile. Glad you missed the "whole day in the hospital" adventure and that you are on the mend. I bled on and off for two weeks after and I hope it won't be that long for you. It's taken me that long to get my head on straight. Big hugs to you!!

Kateandmom - I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. Take care and keep your loved ones close. The medical management (pill) isn't used as often in the states as the D&C. Your doctor or local clinic would be able to tell you what your options are. Where in the states are you?

It's sad to see so many people of us, but good that there is a place to go. My GP said we could go back to ttc at anytime but I'm giving myself one cycle just allow everything to go back to normal.

Thanks so much for all your replies re. my friend. I am worried more about her emotionally - I know I was glad to get my D&C the day after I found out I had MC'd. I don't want her to go through anything worse than I did - what I suffered was bad enough. She has an eight-month-old too so could do without days of pain/blood loss.

I was just worried the hospital was trying to save money by hoping not to give her surgery even if she needs it. They took so long to scan her I can imagine they have loads of women in the same position as her at the moment.

nh101, I am totally there with you! I do too wonder why so many of us are let go for a long period of time "to let the nature take its course." I will sound angry now, cuz I am (plus I think my hormones are starting to go nuts) but to me - 'the nature's way' is being pg and giving birth to a baby.

MC is not in my mind "nature's way." Given that we're in 21st century - I would too think that medicine would be on our side. So to me - it too sounds like $ saving technique.

Also, like your friend I have a little one (19 mnth old). I am less scared about the pain/ blood loss than having to go to the hospital in the middle of the night and what do we do with the baby? Should my husband stay home with him? Will I be able to drive? That's just nuts. We have my mom and my grandparents near by but they don't know anything, including that I was pg for a second. I don't want to freak them out... So my hope is that after today's appt, I will be able to schedule a D&C for tomorrow, go into the hospital in the morning, get it done and over with and then my DH and my baby will pick me up after work/ daycare.

As for your friend - I would totally call the doc's office back and be like: "Listen, I cannot go through the "natural" way - emotionally and for real-life issues, like I have an 8 month old that I am taking care of. So, please let's go ahead and schedule the procedure ASAP. Thank you for understanding!" I wish I said that a week ago!

Hi mcchesers, I thought so since my mw didn't mention anything about the pill last time we spoke... I am in Pennsylvania.

Good luck to all who're TTC. My next hurdle after this will be to convince my DH that things were not that bad for me, I wasn't that badly hurt so we should TTC again. He is mortified that it was his fault for putting me through this - after all I wouldn't be mc, if I didn't get pg, and I wouldn't get pg if it wasn't for him. Gotta love that man

thanks mcchesters well had a scan and all is gone all bar a tiny little clot that they really arent worried about so woohoo ttc number 4 resumes

That's good news Iliketosleep - good luck on the BDing!

Thanks for your post kateandmom - I am going to ring her tonight for a chat (she only text me yesterday and didn't seem in the mood to talk then). What I don't want is to be all "I've been there I know what's best for you" but I want to give her as much help as poss.

You know your friend much better than any one of us. But I just know that SOME of us (like me ) need somebody who can say - "been there, done that, here is what worked/ what didn't work." That's why there are so many of us on this forum, seeking advises and that's why I am so clingy when it comes to ILTS - she's a step ahead of me and it helps me A LOT to know what's yet to come. Makes sense? Good luck and keep us posted! (No pun intended )

as soon as i got to the hospital everything went, the pain the heavy bleeding the lot! I think it was the lying down that helped that jules told me to do but i was to scared as i thought i would fall asleep and never wake up

Im sorry if i gave you a scare katendmom xx I thought when the pain started it wasnt that bad but then the pain kicked in properly and omg teach me to think i got away with it lightly, but im SO very relieved its over!

oh i dont wanna take any chances health wise so when would you suggest we resume "buisness as usual"???

iliketosleep - I'm really glad it getting better. I know what you mean about the pain being bad, I asked the dr to pull the baby out of me when the pain got to much but that was even more painful! Once the baby came out it all stopped and the morphine finally kicked in which helped me to relax.

It's a good idea to waity until the bleeding has stopped to minimse the risk of infection though we 'did the deed' when I was still spotting because I felt like I need the closeness.

Alright, girls, off to my doc's appt now!~ I am scared now . Will post when come back and know more.

hi ladies

hope you are all doing well. I am getting really impatient because i am thinking about ttc the whole time. i need to focus on my work, thesis, packing etc instead of googling things like "how soon after mc can you get p/g?) while at work.

also have no clue whether AF is approaching or not. why am i so out of sync with myself????!!!
went to acupuncture today so hope that is doing something, anything to get me on the right track.

ilts - glad you are on the mend now - all been a bit worrying but you seem to have a positive attitude about everything.

katendmom - i know what you mean. here in denmark, they gave me two options - the medical approach or the d&c but recommended the d&c as it was relatively late (almost 10 weeks). I did it the same day as I found out (actually cycled to the hospital with tears streaming down my cheeks - this is scandinavia!) and felt grateful that the physical part was over so quickly. emotionally is another story. your DH sounds really lovely.

Questions: has everyone given up caffeine and alcohol completely - or cut down?
also, are you taking special herbs and supplement (evening primrose etc?)

well, hope you are all not as impatient as i am. i am off to cook myself a spinach and mushroom risotto (you can see where some of my focus goes...)

sorry, x post.

goodluck katendmom. fingies crossed

thanks for the advice everyone, well i know theres defiantly no chance today and most probably for the next few days as its really knocked me for 6 good luck katendmom xxx

Hello! Just calling in to let you all know that I've been D&Cd. Bham NHS might not do nuchal fold scans, but they appear to be pretty good at dealing with MC. I had my checking its all gone scan at 9.15 on Monday, and was being wheeled in for the D&C at 2.55 the same day!

I spent all day in bed yesterday feeling like absolute crap. I lost quite a lot of blood during the medical management process the week before, and think the ga following so soon after that completely wiped me out. Still, feeling physically s**t takes ones mind of the emotional side of things.

Anyway, now ready to think about ttc again, although not quite there yet physically. I'm going to book myself in for some acupuncture, I'm staying off the booze and caffeine (well trying to), and I'm going to resume the pre-conception vitamins and omega oil tabs. And I'm going to do some exercise again. Well, that's the plan, anyway!

To all the new arrivals - very sorry that you need to join us, but, speaking as a recent arrival myself, it is a good place to be in the circumstances.

ILTS - glad the medical management went well. The blood loss made me pretty tired too, so do take some time out to recover.

Greetings everyone else! Keeping fingers crossed for BFPs from lots of you very soon.....

Hi all~ I'm back - well, it's official now, no life inside me. The unfortunate thing is that everything that used to be life is there. How is that for TMI?

They were going to let me ago again but I totally put my foot down. I told them that with a 19 month old I can't walk around like a time bomb waiting to collapse!

SO... they're trying to schedule me for a D&C ASAP now. They will call me to let me know if they got me in for tomorrow or Friday. It better be before this weekend!

Oh, and the nurse at the office told me - "oh yeah... mc is like labor, cramps, pain, whole 9 yards~" I thought I was going to scream. Wish they told me that a week ago. ILTS, I would have passed that info on to you, girl!!!

So that's the scoop. The sad part is that my DH is very heart-broken. Between us, girls, all this time he was hoping that weeks were off and they would see HB today... I am aching for him more than for myself.

TJuice, I hear you! Scandinavian or Russian for that matter - I think we just try to tough it out . And by the way - I'd die for some mushroom and spinach risotto now!

ILTS, rest up girl - you have TTC fun ahead of you .

Thanks all for your good thoughts!

Very sorry to hear that. Hope they can fit you in soon, and that it all goes smoothly.