The Hut of Gl/Doom Part V- for the unapologetically despondent

[duchesse]

The new hut. Ta-da!

This one is a snug little basement World War 2 type nightclub, with dim lighting, snug velvet sofas, red walls and certainly no politically correct smoking bans. Occasionally certain selected men may be admitted at our convenience.

Sit down, make yourselves at home, and never, ever apologise for feeling like shit. That's about it.

hi all, just checking in, LNO sorry to hear that. its truly pants!

Scorpio, if you're still reading this thread!! Congratulations! Marvelous news.
I'm on a 2ww. Feels unlikely but you never know.

LNO - go for it. It's worth it. The old adage still works - that you'll always feel good knowing you did everything in your power to make things happen....

Hi girls, I need to re-instate the hut please, I have brough loads of green and blacks along with loads of pink gin to tempt you back because I need you
Back to cd1 again and am beginning to wonder if ttc is really what I should be doing. In 20 cycles I have never even managed a BFP (don't mind not having a m/c but in some ways at least it would prove I could get pg - am not trying to upset anyone who has sorry it's just the way my mind is working at the mo) I'm well screwed up about it all and am beginning to wonder if a baby is really worth all this heartache, but I'm not sure I could stop trying either. Can't seem to concentrate at work and am constantly being bombarded with other people announcing pgs. Even the lady serving me in Boots was telling me about her daughter expecting her first. I was really and wanted to tell her to f**k off but am too polite, so I'm unloading in here instead.
Off to see how much gin it is humanly possible to consume...

nomore - [clinks glasses of pink gin] - I am feeling ambivalent towards it all at the moment, as we have not actively tried this cycle. But I am with you on starting to question whether a baby is ever going to come. I too am sick of hearing about other people's pregnancies and/or babies. So sorry that the clomid didn't work this month.

LNO Are you about? Did you carry on with the IVF this month with the 5 follicles? Sorry about your levels. I don't really know much about it all, but still sorry that you are going through it.

Where is everyone else? Don't tell me everyone is super happy and no longer dwelling in the hut

Hello NMM, And herumph. When it's bad, it's bad, isn't it? I've heard about 3 new baby girls being born this week. I am truly happy for all concerned but it's just an act when I say it out loud. Some sort of disconect between brain and heart.
How far have you been chasing medical support and information? I know that my situation is reasonably clear, I am pretty old although tests say 'Fine' but DP has poor swimmers so chances are very slim.
Work is very busy and quite stressful - I would really like to just curl up and doze somewhere.

Ha, Ready! I might be the only one but I'm NOT HAPPY today. Tired mainly. I'll join you in a pink gin, yummy. I'll be asleep before 2 at this rate!

Soreheart - I am NOT HAPPY either. In a more weird way. Just floating along, waiting. Sigh. I keep thinking how no-one ever said it would be this hard. Sorry you are NOT HAPPY too.

I am happy today, but because I have had two bits of excellent news today, neither of which are baby-related.

I won't try to cheer you up: FTC really is absolute shite and I recognise all too well what you describe. I haven't been able to try for months for various reasons, and week by week someone else overtakes me by announcing their pregnancy. Most are on their second. I might have to go and make a whole new circle of non-ttc or ftc friends, because it's very hard to bear. Grrrr.

Anyway, my commiserations for your cd1. Here is a piping hot homemade strawberry and apple crumble. Hope it helps x

Ooooh. Tell us your news Exam results????

Maybe I should change my name today to NOT HAPPY??
Impy - I bet you passed those exams, dincha? Eh? Well done. A++++ all round?

I've been peeking at the Not-Quite-Doom-Hut Caravan thread. It's been a bit of a wake-up call for me to realise that people are frightened by goings-on in the Huts .....
Could it be that I am genuinely quite a hard, fed-up person? I've never been in the least bit offended - just understood the need to blow off steam and write things we feel we can't say in RL. Hmm.... maybe I'm tougher than I thought. Feel like a weepy marshmallow most of the time!
More pink gin, anyone?

oh yes, more gin. I like the hut, I know it's here when I need it rather than being a regular (though I do lurk sometimes). The hut is meant to be a raw dark place, that's what I need. The caravan is still too happy for me, if I'm happy(ish) I'll go on my usual ttc no1 thread where my friends are.
Ready ((hugs)) I know how you feel, there was a month a while ago that we didn't try properly and it actually felt quite nice not to be thinking 'could I be pg?' at the end of it, it was quite liberating!
impatience go on share your news, but no smilies!
soreheart we're under gynae now, I'm on 2nd cycle of Clomid after 20 months of ttc with no joy.

apologies for poor typing, it's more of a stream of thought than anything too composed. if I went back and read what I'd written I think I'd delete it for being a waste of type.

yes, I am officially a complete smart-arse: A's all round! (I think they ARE easier than when I did them 15 years ago...) And my beautiful wonderful sister is coming back from her extensive travels and will come and stay with us. So I'll have some of that gin to celebrate

I looked at the caravan thread when it first opened and felt really surprised that people had been offended and upset by us. I know there was a bit of friction recently when Duchesse outlined a few preferences, but people were refering to old stuff. I've never noticed anything offensive so I'm surprised and confused. Perhaps we don't realise our own strength! Er, not that I'd be at all pleased to have the power to upset people... I think it's safe to carry on saying what y ou want to say now we're already catagorised as a bunch of meanies.

I called myself a smartypants then spelt categorised all wrong. Oops.

LIBERATING!!! That's the word I have been looking for all sodding day! Thanks petal!

What's all this about a caravan? I had a little break from MN, did I miss something? Someone fill me in, or do I have to traul through this thread?

No smiling, but congrats on being a smart-arse Impatience - at the risk of sounding twee - You go girl!

I am looking for the caravan....

I think there is a point we all come to where we really can't stand anyone else saying 'it'll happen' and you just want someone to say 'I know how you feel, it's crap isn't it' Was telling my Mum about the hut and she thought it was good that we're all here to support each other. She had stopped asking how ttc is going as she doesn't want to upset me, but we had a heart to heart and I said I wanted her to ask but not to tell me it would be ok and to let me be sad sometimes. I think that's what we do for each other.
impy well done you smart-arse!

some people felt they weren't welcome in the hut (mainly I think because they were too happy but they said they were made to feel that they hadn't suffered enough to 'qualify' for the hut) so went and set up the caravan as an alternative. Personally I like the hut as it is and feel it's where I belong on days like this. If you want the rest of the story find the hut before this one and read through the most recent posts.

impy well done big brain! really pleased for you.

re the caravan/hut thing i think people misunderstood the purpose of the hut. they were expecting another ttc thread and didnt understand that here we FTC instead.

My mum is the worst at that (yeah, I know - me, me, me ) she always says "it'll be ok, it'll happen, you just need to relax" I just want to scream "WTF do you know!" But that would be terribly unfair!

Tell me about the caravan?? What's occurred?

that sounded blase and i didnt mean it to. i like the hut. i belong here. on another thread i gave a list of ttc things that i was fed up of. the biggest one for me was staying optimistic. i dont want to be upbeat. i have been upbeat for all my pgs. in feb i convinced myself that everything would be ok and it wasnt. im tired of pretending now and smiling at peoples BFP's/scan pics/birth announcements because at various times in the year i know "that shouldve been me"

Thanks girls (not-smiling-but-pleased emoticon)

Long live the hut. It's been my lifesaver so many times. Thank goodness for the arm-patting and drink-refilling that is what I really need rather than well-intended morale-boosts. Someone in the caravan said someone on here had told them to pull their socks up. Sounds VERY unhutlike - can't have been a true huttee. If someone told me to pull my socks up on here I'd throttle them with said socks.

(Ready, the Caravan of Crap. I only read the first few posts where people said they'd felt intimidated by the Hut dwellers. It's probably a fab thread for those who aren't as miserable as me - I haven't read any more so really don't know. Horses for courses, Huts for sluts. Sorry, couldn't help myself.)