TTC after pregnancy loss thread 31 - baby penguins are coming!

[strawberrye]

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Welcome to the 🐧 huddle. This is a wonderful supportive group for anyone TTC after the loss of a pregnancy or baby. Together we can get through he rollercoaster of TTC and get our baby penguins xx

@strawberrye thank you. Really hope that you also get your BFP and rainbow very soon x

Hi everyone, I thought I’d mark my place on this thread.

Me: 40 years old (birthday was on Sunday.
Pregnancy 1: accidental on honeymoon but mmc at 12 weeks in Feb.
Pregnancy 2: straight after ERPC in March but a chemical pregnancy.

I’ve therefore only been able to properly try since our losses last cycle but it was anovulatory. Annoyingly my cycles can be long down to what we think is very mild pcos.

We didn’t catch the next cycle as couldn’t dtd due to DHs SA which was normal. My last cycle was anovulatory and 42 days long. Now cd 12 and awaiting a fertility consultant appointment.

I thought I’d have a meltdown on my birthday on Sunday but was fine and still very optimistic about conceiving our first child this year. All our tests came back normal.

I’m sorry there’s been trouble on this and the graduate thread. I think it’s good everyone aired their views and hopefully we can have a compromise. I’m on another thread and it’s worked quite well with pregnant graduates checking in from time to time. Obviously not full on scan pictures but just a little update. It’s lovely to hear success stories but I appreciate on some days it’s hard for some. Xx

Thanks @WantLifeToBeBetter I'll definitely check that out x

Thinking of you today @InDreamland, really hope you get some good news today ❤️

I am so sorry @FirstTimeMama91 sending love xxx

@Mistymeow @AliceRR @DuvetCaterpillar @VenusStarr @TinyPaws @Avocuddles thank you for your kind words and helpful advice x

Well ladies I'm officially cd1

Question for you lovely ladies (Tmi) I've noticed since my last mc that my period is a lot lighter than its ever been in my life. I'm not sure if what I have now is normal and the heavy periods (I thought they were) I had before were abnormal. If its not too tmi could you tell me what you think and possibly about your flow so I can make my mind up as to if this is good or bad. My period never seems to get passed medium flow, lasts for maybe 2 1/2 days, very bright red and no clots at all. My cycle is about 24 days long, with no spotting.

Hi @Lilimum7 I was talking about this last cycle to someone on here, can’t remember if it was you. My period used to last 5 days and was medium / heavy flow. I stupidly didn’t understand how to count cycle length so counted day’s between periods and it was usually 28 days so would have been a 33 day cycle. Then about 4-5 years ago they got much lighter and shorter. 3-4 days long and light-medium flow bit still 28 days between periods so 31-32 day cycle. I was having weird hormonal issues too so was tested tor PCOS etc and they said there was nothing untoward. I got pregnant last year and since I had my baby my cycle is a bit irregular now but it’s on the lighter side as it was just before I got pregnant. I’ve had a 26, 34 and 30 day cycle. I think your cycle can just change.

My periods since having my baby have been on average 3 days long with spotting on either side (almost seems like more spotting than af!)

@FirstTimeMama91 I'm so sorry to hear your news.

Hi @Lilimum7. My periods ever since coming off the pill were very short and light - they lasted no more than 3 days and was never enough flow to soak a pad or tampon. My cycles were typically 40 days long so I would have thought plenty would have 'built up' in that time but clearly not the case! I haven't had a period since my MC but will keep you posted! I'm currently 35 days on from my miscarriage, and 3 DPO, so am assuming af towards the end of next week (or maybe even a BFP, but I'm doubtful given how long it took me to conceive first time around)

Hi @Lilimum7 my cycles are a similar length and the flow is not heavy. When I first started my periods they were very heavy, big clots and lasted a week. I was on the pill for around 16 years then came off to ttc. The first few months were brown sludge (sorry!) then had 6 months of accupuncture and the flow was much healthier looking but still only lasting around 2-3 days.

Since my mmc the first two were heavy and clotty and painful but periods only lasted around 3 days. Even my miscarriage bleeding was only around 5 days with brown spotting either side. I had the hsg (dye test) earlier this month, had a 22 day cycle and a really bright red, no clots, no pain, very light period.

So, clear as mud! It seems a few of us have short periods. Hope af isn't too painful today x

@Avocuddles we're similar dpo, I'm due af around 10-12 July. Keeping my fingers crossed for us 🤞

Thanks ladies I'll just have to see how it goes. But honestly I think I could get away with just a panty liner. Surely that would mean that I'm not building up much of a layer in my womb. Oh god I worry about everything wish I could just switch off.

@Lilimum7 sorry you are back to cd1 today. My AF is sadly the opposite (well it was before mc). First one was quite light but last month was awful and worse than normal. I'm not sure there is such a thing as 'normal'.

I have a question, last month I had loads of symptoms, sore boobs, fatigue, gassy - I felt pg, AF came as usual so I obviously wasn't. This month, I due af on sat/Sunday and I have zero symptoms, no sore boobs or anything. I know I ovulated and when as I use opk and chart my temps. I do not remember ever being this symptomless at this stage in my cycle. Does anyone else have cycles that vary in symptoms? I'm 9dpo today and just feel different this cycle and in a completely not pregnant way?

@Kayjay2018 Two cycles ago I had a similar thing. I had all the pregnancy symptoms, or so it seemed! Sore boobs, emotional, strong sense of smell, constipation etc. I then started spotting at about CD25 and was convinced it was implantation bleeding but it turned out to be af. Last cycle and this cycle I barely had any symptoms. I’m 11DPO / CD25 and have started spotting today... so yes my cycles vary a lot and I think I’m hypersensitive to every change but I do log most things on Ovia and that helps as I can look back to previous cycles

Thanks @AliceRR - I don't have any female friends I could ask these things. Good to know it's quite normal. I use fertility friend to track my bbt and symptoms and that's how I know it's so different from previous cycles. I think I so desperately wish to have a baby with my DH that I'm spotting things that are not really there.

I have my lupus blood tests on Friday so should know next week if I have any markers and then whether that could be the link to my mc and not getting pg. (I know I've only been trying since September but I'm 38 so it's been more than six months).

@FirstTimeMama91 very sorry for your loss

@AliceRR @Lilimum7 I think I spoke to someone on here about this recently. For a few months my periods were really light but actually the more time has passed the heavier they have got. They are still different to before as in now I have a really heavy 1.5 days and then a light 2 days, versus a previous steady 4 days.
I was really worried that all was not well when periods were so light but ultrasound showed that lining was still really good and so doctor/acupuncturist everyone told me to not worry it was just my body recovering. I had about 6 months off TTC and it was only at the end of that time things settled down.

@InDreamland hope that you are doing ok.

Sorry to the new people that find themselves here

Sorry anyone I missed thread has moved on fast and feel like I've missed some bits

@FirstTimeMama91 and @WantLifeToBeBetter I'm so sorry for your losses, how are you holding up today? Sorry also to @Lilimum7 on being back to CD1, and the unhelpful leaflets - what a kick in the teeth. Hope you're all OK.

Thanks for the good wishes earlier in the thread. Still no AF, but my periods are prone to doing weird things when I'm stressed and it's a very busy patch at work, so it's probably that and I'm trying not to think about it too hard. If I make it to the weekend with no more news, then I'll test. Until then, I'm going to studiously ignore it all because I'm scared and don't want to get my hopes up. Totally ostriching!

@VenusStarr @fnej01 thank you ...... have updated the other thread now but it's good.

@Lilimum7 after mc#1 AF got lighter than ever before. Then after mc#2 it for way way way lighter and shorter too, I was really worried about it, think I mentioned a few times on previous threads. I'd say flow wise Lee yoy said it never goes past medium flow. I'd get 1 day light, 1 day medium then back to light again for 3 days then stop. I used to get proper heavy ones on day 2, like soaking through night pads and it was like yukky messy. Not really since mc#1 though. So many on here I've read have said mc proper messes with our cycles and flow. If you're worried though definitely all your GP or rmc consultant.

Thanks ladies. Who would have thought I'd be wishing for a heavier period this ttc lark is messed up!!!

@InDreamland just read your update really pleased for you x

@InDreamland so pleased to see your good news. Rooting for everything to work out for you, great to see a nice strong healthy one.

@VenusStarr fingers crossed for you too! When do you plan to test? I go on holiday on Sunday for 11 days so going to pack both pg tests and period protection! If AF is going to arrive i hope she does it sooner rather than later so I can enjoy a few days of chilled white wine in the sun, but obviously hoping for the best....

@Lilimum7 your description of only needing a panty liner does sound very similar to my periods. Yes, I did think I had fertility issues, but I fell naturally pregnant nonetheless. My cycles were all over the place beforehand so I'm kind of hoping that they coming back better after the MC, but probably wishful thinking! Maybe book in an appointment with your gp if you're concerned that things don't seem right? Only you can know what's 'normal' for your body.

@Kayjay2018 when I fell pregnant the only symptoms I got were basically the same as pre menstrual symptoms - a bit of cramping / general aching and a volatile moods! I actually thought AF was about to arrive - I had no reason to suspect pregnancy as it was the first month that we'd stopped actively trying as we'd been put on the fertility treatment list - but after three days of symptoms and no bleeding I tested.

@DuvetCaterpillar ostriching is a very sensible approach! Fingers crossed that when you're ready to lift your head out of the sand that you get a positive result!

@Lilimum7 I started spotting yesterday so think af is imminent and we are about in synch again!

@AliceRR it's quite nice having a cycle buddy. Let's hope we both get our bfps together this cycle too xx

My periods are all over the place since starting trying again - some months are crazy heavy, some much more normal. I'm trying raspberry leaf tea to try and help regulate things - this month was much better so I'm hoping it helps.

Felt quite relaxed last month about it not working out but since af has tailed off this month I am getting really stressed about it again. I just want to be pregnant! Now please!!