TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 30 - huddle up and bring on the BFP's

[Lilimum7]

🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧

Welcome to the 🐧 huddle. This is a wonderful supportive group for anyone ttc after the loss of a pregnancy or baby. Together we can get through the ttc crazyness xx baby dust to everyone xx

Hey everyone!

Here’s me :)

TTC #1 since October 2019
Age: 30
Miscarried April 2019, I was 11 weeks but baby died at 6 weeks.
Just had my first period since my MC so currently trying again.

I’m anxious about getting pregnant and losing baby again, but I want this more than anything now so bravely going forward. I’m more bruddy now that I’ve carried, than I ever have.

I don’t know anyone else who’s had a MC either, so it’s been comforting reading this thread, so thank you
Xxx

@Mistymeow I've been reading and reading about him and have found so many positive stories. Fingers crossed he can help us. Lucky he is based at your local hospital, I am not looking forward to the 4 hours travelling there and 4 hours back 🤦🏼‍♀️

@Mistymeow I've booked one!

Thanks @Mistymeow

Sorry to read of your MC @Plattsy88 I think we all understand the desire to have a child especially after a loss

Sorry I’m full of questions today... I got the CB connected OPK but assume they’re all the same in that you’re supposed to use FMU. I turned it on and it wants me to test today but I wonder whether I am better testing today (not FMU obviously) or wait ‘til tomorrow.

My understanding is CB predicts high / peak fertility based on your hormone levels each time so can’t help but think I’ll just mess up the results by testing now so should wait for tomorrow? 🤷🏻‍♀️

@moonpeace I feel rubbish today. I’m glad I’m not in my fertile days yet (as far as I know) as I just don’t feel positive at all today. People shouldn’t ask about plans to have more dc. It’s none of their business and people should have some awareness that it’s not that straightforward. I’m sorry you’re feeling down but that doesn’t mean it won’t happen for you this cycle xx

Just a quick question. After a very early chemical pregnancy do you usually ovulate as normal or does it take longer, I've had chemicals before but I can't remember if it just goes back to normal straight away or not? Only asking because I don't want to waste clearblue fertility monitor sticks because they are bloody expensive x

I'm sorry you've had to go through this again @Lilimum7 After mine I ovulated on day 36 so a frustratingly long time. It was however the cycle after a mmc with surgery so two losses back to back. Hopefully you're won't be delayed. I'm using digital opks this cycle and on cd 8 so I've started temping to see what my temps do before I start using. Xx

Thanks @moonpeace @AliceRR I'm getting there and feeling more positive everyday.

I think I'm going to be ovulating next week so I'm off to Boots later to get some ovulating sticks.

Also, I'm trying to not put pressure on myself about catching this time around - which is hard because I really want it. But it took 6 months last time.

Xx

@plattsy88 sorry for your loss. I was the same in that I didn’t know anyone who had a miscarriage and felt very alone. This thread has been such a support to me, I hope you find the same. Please ask any questions.
@alicerr sorry you feel crap. Sending a big hug. I think they recommend you don’t use FMU for opks because you generally get the surge later in the day (between 2-10pm, I usually test in the evening). I actually find the ic off Amazon very reliable so if you’re finding it too expensive I do recommend the one step (they take a bit of getting used to).
@lilimum7 from what I can gather it varies (so frustrating). I would look out for ovulation signs and use the opks. Hopefully it won’t affect your cycles but don’t worry if your o date is later this cycle.
@catconfusion how are you doing? Has your cycle settled down?
@moonpeace sorry you feel down. I believe Dr Quenby in Coventry tests for NK cells.
@pop1234 that’s quite a commute! I hope you can make a day out of it. I do feel lucky to have such great care from the nhs where I am, it makes such a difference.

I think I may have a super squinter on an ic. I’m only 7dpo but I tested because I’m travelling to a wedding later today and won’t have another opportunity. I’m not a big drinker but would like a couple of glasses- WWYD?

Thanks for asking @Mistymeow My last cycle was a bit crazy: very late ovulation and hormones all over the place. AF came last week and I had such a dark mood. It did pass though and I'm cd 8 now. I started temping today and will start up CB connected opks in a few days.

I really hope your squinter develops into a firm line. Drinking is a personal choice and I see no harm in a couple. I'd personally abstain because I got caught out with my first pregnancy after a negative test and having quite a few Christmas drinks at about 7 dpo. The doctor and midwife reassured me it wouldn't have had any affect but I still felt bad. It played on my mind when it was a missed miscarriage even though I knew it wasn't the reason I lost the baby! Xx

@Mistymeow The CB connected ones say to use FMU so I just didn’t test last night and tested today

Personally I wouldn’t drink if I thought I might be pregnant but then I know I drank last year when I was pregnant with my daughter (before I knew I was pregnant) and I think that’s pretty common

Thanks @Mistymeow

I do have a question though for the thread in general, how quickly did your cycles start after your MC?

From day 1 of my MC it only took 26 days for my 1st period to come, so only 2 weeks where I wasn't bleeding. My cycle is usually 26-28 days anyway (before my pregnancy). So technically it's normal, but I thought it would take longer to start up again? And my period was completely normal like the pregnancy had never happened.

I found nothing online either, so just made me a bit curious....

P x

@Plattsy88 after my stillbirth my period came back after 29 days (normally 26 day cycle), after my 1st daughter they came back after 28 days. First period was fairly normal but 2nd was really heavy.

@catconfusion sorry the last cycle was rough, I hope it kicks back in to being regular. Yes I totally think having the odd drink is harmless but when you’ve been through pregnancy loss you become super cautious. I think I’ll stick to soft drinks.
@alicerr oh I’m sorry I didn’t realise that about the monitor, how fancy! Just stick to the instructions and you’ll be fine. Ignore me :) Yes I think I will leave the drinks this time, just in case. I won’t be testing again until Monday.
@plattsy88 that’s great your cycle has kicked back in so quickly. It seems to vary woman to woman what a miscarriage does to your cycles. Mine became irregular after my first, and it’s been 10 weeks since my second and still no af. But I’m not worried because I’m ovulating regularly (confirmed with blood test). It’s just a nuisance. So don’t worry if your O day changes slightly next month, nothing to worry about.

@FrillyFarmer thank you. We will see NHS consultant again in 5 months ........ no idea what they'll do, all they're interested in is IVF. Fx for you this cycle!

@Pop1234 thank you. I hate AF. Fx you don't have to wait looking for another BFP.

@AliceRR thank you, that is exactly how I feel, I'm just surrounded and it's just in my face rubbing my nose in it. Yes I get it, the universe loves ask those people so much they have a nice easy life and get everything they want. Sorry, I'm just angry with the world. I think I would say start the OPKs from CD8 if last cycle was short, just in case. I use FMU until I get high fertility then I test twice a day, once with FMU and then in the evening. Fx they help and you get your BFP soon.

@Mistymeow I might try it but they're not specialists in infertility or pregnancy loss and I've heard they aren't brilliant for those more complicated issues. The IC squinter sounds promising, personally I wouldn't drink just in case. Fx it turns into a nice strong line.

@Plattsy88 sorry you find yourself here, mc is so cruel.

@moonpeace sorry you've been feeling low, I feel the dance as you said, shouldn't be there if first baby survived as would be on mat leave and if second baby had survived I'd now be about 6 weeks away from starting mat leave. Sucks eh? Hope things at work settle down and you feel better.

@Lilimum7 my second mc last year was an early loss and after the really heavy long bleeding stopped I have no idea if I ovulated as I decided not to test until the next cycle started but that one I did ovulate as normal according to the CB OPKs. I think it can be different each time though.

CD3 for me, AF getting light again although had almost normal flow yesterday. I hate my useless body. I just hope it continues for another 2 days at least so I feel my periods are a bit more normal as since MC#1 they've just not been normal. I just wish I could have my 2 babies back.

@Bluebelltulip thank you for sharing. Yeah I was just surprised by how it came so quickly. They told me it could be up to 8 weeks, so assumed it wouldn't be near my normal cycle date.

@Mistymeow yeah I guess I just assumed it would be so on time. If my cycle is 'back to normal' then technically I could be ovulating next week, so I think I'll take buy some ovulation sticks to see if that's true or not.

@InDreamland thanks, you never think it's going to happen to you. So cruel. Wish I knew how common it was before I decided to have a baby, might have helped? I dunno, but I do know now that if I get pregnant again I'll be more aware of how common it is and not beat myself up about it.

Thanks again for all your comments and support

P x

@AliceRR @Mistymeow thank you, logically speaking I know it should be fine but as you both know yourself you panic over everything. I feel like wrapping myself in bubble wrap and not leaving the house! 🤣

Even though it’s so early I decided to tell my boss today as I have a few appointments coming up. She was really nice about it, she told me straight away she doesn’t want me lifting the babies/toddlers anymore so for the duration of my pregnancy I’ll work in the junior 3-5 years room. That was quite a relief. It felt like a weight lifted off my shoulders, didn’t want to say quite so soon but I’m glad I did. She’s carrying out a risk assessment next week for the rest of the nursery too for me so that was reassuring!

@Plattsy88 I’ve had 5 losses and each time my period has returned really quickly. My periods are also lighter now and I no longer get period pain. Very strange! It seems to be so different for everyone. It’s good that your body is back to normal already. Wishing you the best of luck with TTC and welcome! So sorry you find yourself here x

@hayleyfx thanks for sharing. And thank you, I'm probably being more careful now with my eating and drinking habits now I'm TTC again lol I too feel like wrapping myself up in bubble wrap.

My partners been amazing as well, I have 2 step children who have no idea what we're going through (to protect them), and I'm grateful I have them in my life too. But they do make me want my own, and I know they both would love to have another sibling (we've not told them we're TTC).

I am glad I've found this forum, it's nice to talk about things that have been in my head and with people who understand.

P x

Hello ladies I'm sorry for all of your losses .

I wondered if someone could help me... I had a mmc and surgical management 15 days ago. I'd stopped bleeding after 6 days had regular discharge for 4 days then started with brown spotting since. I've had vv faint positive hpt's for a few days, was doing clear blue digital opks and they were showing as low fertility. This morning I got an (almost) invisible positive hpt and had my first flashing smiley. Do you think the flashing smiley is likely to be authentic since I'm almost a negative pregnancy test?

Morning ladies,

Sorry I haven't really caught up with the thread; just skim-read some of it.

@Lilimum7 sounds like your appointment went well. I felt a bit flat after my first one too because I felt like nothing was 'done', but you're getting loads of tests and the gynae you saw sounds very knowledgeable, so it sounds like it went as well as it could have. I'm really pleased for you that they're being so thorough. Do you know when your follow-up appointment is yet?

@Mistymeow When will you test again? And do you know when you'll be going to the breast clinic?

@hayleyfx Really glad you told your manager; it sounds like the risk assessment will give you the reassurance you need and I'm really glad you won't be picking up any heavy children! I'm so glad you're getting the treatment you need too! Things are looking really positive. Stay strong! Hugs xxx

I'm currently CD 22 and I think 9DPO. Not feeling pregnant at all. AF should be due on Thursday or Friday. Will be interesting to see if it's any different on this Cabergoline medicine. I normally spot for 2-3 days before my period; if that stops I'll be really please, because I'm always worried that my hormones aren't quite doing what they should when they should. I have some of those cheap tests which I might use on Monday; I got them because I'm supposed to take the progesterone pessaries when I get a BFP so I want to start testing early. I also have a couple of FRER to crack open, but I'm saving those for as long as possible.

had a dream last night that I was pregnant with quadruplets and really freaked out. I dream about pregnancy a lot; does everyone else?

@Plattsy88 After my stillbirth, my period came back after 26 days, only maybe a week (or a bit less) after I had stopped pp bleeding.

@KnitKitty I don’t dream about pregnancy so much but I have had a few dreams with babies. Last month I was having lots of dreams in the 2ww and it contributed to me thinking I was pregnant

@Chanel05 I’m not sure tbh. If your pg test is faint then it’s still positive so I’d be wary of any result and I think the CB ones say not to use within 2 months of pregnancy but you could always do the BD just to make sure 🤷🏻‍♀️😬

@AliceRR thank you for sharing and I'm sorry for your loss. It's starting to sound pretty normal and okay that your body 'bounces' back into the swing of things. It amazes me! I'm almost proud of my body in a way

X

Abstained from my pregnant friends' reveal party and the fucking cuntpuffin has sent me a twee "bump reveal" photo.

I don't know whether to just phase her out of my day to day or just actually tell her that she's an insensitive wankface for doing this to me today. Another weekend break ruined by her shitting pregnancy. And I know I'm quite unreasonable but I'm dead mad eighth now.

@frillyfarmer you're not being unreasonable, it's perfectly understandable and I would feel exactly the same in your shoes. It was unnecessary and insensitive of her. Sending hugs.