Trying to conceive first child with PCO/PCOS or irregular long cycles

[Catconfusion]

Hi there,

I'm currently on my 3rd cycle ttc my first child and I suffer with irregular cycles due to PCO. I conceived first cycle but it was a missed miscarriage at 10 weeks. My second cycle was a chemical pregnancy. I'm now on my 3rd and it's day 34 with no ovulation yet. I'm using Ovusense to temp which helps to show when I've ovulated. I can't help but worry it was a fluke to fall quickly like I did. Just wondering if there's anyone else in a similar situation struggling with long cycles as I'm finding it really frustrating. Looking forward to chatting to some of you! x

@Catconfusion My appointment is next Wednesday. DP has decided to come with me after all so I don't have to go it alone now 😊

Do OPK's get darker the closer you get to O or is there no pattern?

Also do they get indentation lines?

I took this one.. is that indentation or a super faint line? (I know its negative either way)

If it is faint will it get darker the closer to O or is it just random?

@EssJayyCee hi! Generally you'll have a faint line on an opk all month round. I found the Premom app really helpful for tracking the line s as it stores daily photos and makes a graph of the progression of the lines....
I'm really glad you're feeling ok and positive about the future.
I'm six weeks today and pretty terrified, one week to go until my scan so just trying to keep going until then!

@EssJayyCee yes as @Avocuddles said the lines will be faint throughout the month. You’re looking for it being darker than the control which will usually build up over a couple of days so quite quick. It’s easy to miss the surge as it can happen quickly. I found mine would happen late afternoon early evening so test throughout the day if you can. Just beware of false positives. I would get a positive but no consistent temp rise and then another positive a weeks later with a rise.

So glad dp can come with you to the appointment. xx

@avocuddles not long now then. I’m hoping all ok. Just hang in there. You’re doing so well! xx

Ahh.. so ovulation isn't on it's way then... I got a bit excited..

I want to be positive but I have a huge feeling we are out for 2020... I honestly don't think we will get pregnant again this year.

My fingers are crossed for you @Avocuddles 🤞🏻

@EssJayyCee it’s difficult to say but no it doesn’t look like you’re having a surge yet. Keep checking though as it can come very quickly.

You never know, I didn’t think it’d happen for me by the end of last year. I think you’ll be in a better position after your appointment because you’ll know what else you can do to increase your chances. Xx

@Catconfusion still no positive opk.
And my BBT is all over the place still.

I'm getting nervous about my appointment on Wednesday. I feel like they are just going to send me for more blood tests or something else unproductive.

I just want some good news about something.
We both do.
DP has just been diagnosed with Arthritis in both hips at 28 years old. So it's just been a huge shit storm for us so far in 2020.

My crazy stupid chart.

@EssJayyCee I know it's no consolation but my first couple of cycles after each miscarriage have been long and all over the place, but a few months down the line I've had a shorter one and conceived. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself to get that result too quickly. I personally stopped charting completely as I felt it wasn't great for my mental health, if it's getting you down maybe consider stepping back from it for a little bit and just seeing what happens?
I would suggest you ask about ovulation induction at your appointment - it might be a good next step to at least give you more regular cycles. Sorry to hear about your DH, that's a tough diagnosis at such a young age

Hi,

@Avocuddles I keep my fingers crossed for you !

@EssJayyCee, this opk thing is driving me nuts too :-/ I have had cm for the past 3 weeks so was hoping ovulation would arrive... but no o so far. My opk do not get darker and my bbt is pretty much the same all the Time. 2020 looks like not going to be my year either.

@Avocuddles I was just hoping that maybe I could just be one of those lucky people who are super fertile after a MC. Who am I trying to kid.
I am on CD24 (from counting first day of bleeding of miscarriage) and I have just been to the toilet and I seem to be very lightly spotting.. so maybe AF is on her way? I am hoping so... then it'll be a fresh cycle for us to TTC from.

I can see why you stopped charting. It does drive me crazy interpreting the charts all of the time but at the same time I think it is keeping me sane having something to focus on. (Is that stupid?)

Is it okay to ask something like that? Isn't that like telling the doctor how to do their job? 🤔 I really would like something to induce ovulation because it's clear it doesn't happen every cycle.

Yes, it's a crap diagnosis. He is so fit and healthy in every other way. He's been told he will be looking at a hip replacement in 10-15 years.. :(

I hope you're doing okay? Is it your scan on Tuesday?

@Ellabb We both need to stop being Negative Nellie's! 2020 has only just begun! It's got alot of twists and turns before we can write it off completely! WE CAN DO THIS! 🤞🏻

It's definitely ok asking. Make it clear how long and irregular your cycles can be - there's every chance they'll say to give it a few more months but it's worth starting the conversation. I was about to start ovulation induction only a couple of months after a loss because my cycles were still all over the place. They might have been willing to start a little sooner due to me being over 35, but there's no harm in mentioning that you're concerned that it was a one off because you know that you don't ovulate regularly.

My scan is tomorrow and I'm petrified. I'm obsessively checking for blood every time I go to the toilet as I'm very much in the danger zone based on my previous losses. I'll let you know how it goes.....

Hey @EssJayyCee I’m not sure if you remember in the summer I had a really strange cycle. I seem to remember discussing it with you. I got a strong rise like on your chart and then it just seemed to come down and fluctuate. I then got weird spotting which I’ve never had before. Just over four weeks later I fell pregnant with this baby 32 days into the next cycle. I’ve found a particularly bad cycle can lead into a much better one so it could happen very soon.

I’m not sure if I’ve said but I have arthritis in both my hips. I was a similar age to your partner when I was diagnosed. I have to say it hasn’t got much worse. If anything I deal with it better now. I’m not on any medication for it. At first they told me 5 years until a hip replacement. I’m now 40 and they’re telling me I probably have another 10 years. 50 is maybe a little early but not unheard of for a hip replacement so I’m pleased.

Arthritis takes a long time to wear a joint down. There are lots of things he can do to slow the process. It’s important to stay active but not too active. Walking is good but I try to limit myself to 10 000 steps. I certainly stop if I have hip pain. Heavily pregnant I can still manage 2500 steps so it’s not too bad. If he can find a non weight bearing exercise like swimming or cycling it’ll help. If he has physio tell him to try and keep up the exercises. It’s really tough and I’ve been guilty of not doing them regularly enough. They are so good though at keeping the joints mobile. Keeping weight down helps too.

I really hope he has has many years before anything needs doing. Xx

@EssJayyCee I can echo what @Catconfusion says about a good cycle following a bad one - my previous cycle was 60 days long, then on the most recent one I conceived on day 23. This one might not be the one, but the next one could be....

@Avocuddles best of luck for your scan. I’ve got everything crossed for you. It’s so nerve wracking but hopefully all will be ok and you’ll get some relief from the worry. I know the anxiety doesn’t go away completely but it’ll be a great sign if all ok tomorrow! I found gentle breathing and letting intrusive thoughts wash over me while waiting for and having the scan. Hopefully you can find a way of coping that works for you Xx

I don't believe I will ever get a good cycle. My body is f*ed. 👍🏼

Spotting has stopped.. I had a streak last night and a streak this morning and nothing since..

Temp dropped to its lowest this cycle this morning so I was really expecting AF to develop by tonight but nope..

What was your first period like after MC?
Heavier, lighter or normal? Was it more painful too?

Hey @EssJayyCee I can guarantee you will have good cycles again. I know it doesn’t feel like it now. Your body just needs to reset and deal with what’s happened.

It sounds like maybe you’ve had this bleed in place of what would have been a period. Sometimes the egg can’t quite pop through properly and it doesn’t rupture. This can cause a slight rise in progesterone and temperature but it isn’t sustained and it triggers a bleed. It’s so similar to what I had in the summer.

It’s difficult to say as my 2 losses were back to back. It was definitely heavier and more painful but that was after the surgery. The couple of cycles after that were a bit odd. I had one where I ovulated but had a light bleed. Then I had the really duff one I described above where it was literally spotting. The next one was my lucky one so it took only 3 cycles albeit long ones. I honestly think stress and trauma contributed to the weird one. My friend had her baby at the time and I was really upset. It’s so cruel how the trauma of miscarriage can ironically throw your cycles off. I wish I’d just believed it would all work out in the end.

@Avocuddles just to wish you another good luck for today. Let us know how you get on! Xx

@Catconfusion I think I conceived too quickly the second time round (second cycle) and my body wasn't healed yet. Third time round I took some time out from the pressure of TTC, my first few cycles were all over the place and likely to be anovulatory but four months on I had a more 'normal' length one. No temping, just cheapie OPKs.
@EssJayyCee my first period each time was relatively light but a bit 'stop start'. Second cycle was really long and I don't think I ovulated, followed by a short and light period again. Third one (four months later) - conceived again. Hopefully it will only be a matter of time for you now x

@Avocuddles sounds similar to me. It was three weeks after ERPC surgery I was pregnant again. I remember being so desperate to be pregnant again. Even so we didn’t think it would happen. My body was simply not ready which was sad but in a way I’m glad as that pregnancy would have been even more anxiety inducing. When my body was rested and the pressure was off it happened x

Scan went ok, everything is looking roughly in line with where it should be with a good heartbeat. Legs feel like jelly now!!!! They’re bringing me back in for another one in two weeks time so fingers crossed it’ll be progressing as it should.....

@Avocuddles so happy with these beautiful news !! You must feel a bit better !!! Keeping my fingers crossed for you and your baby !!

Yay @Avocuddles that’s amazing news. You must feel so relieved. It’s such a big hurdle to get through. Great they are giving you another scan in a couple of weeks. I know you have a long road ahead but once the heartbeat is seen, chances are good. I’m sure you know that already. It’s just so hard to believe after such bad luck before. We’re all rooting for you though! xx

That's fantastic news @Avocuddles!! So happy for you xx

Thanks guys - I'm really hoping it's third time lucky 🍀

@Avocuddles yes, no reason why not. It’s all looking good 🙂 xx