Trying to conceive first child with PCO/PCOS or irregular long cycles

[Catconfusion]

Hi there,

I'm currently on my 3rd cycle ttc my first child and I suffer with irregular cycles due to PCO. I conceived first cycle but it was a missed miscarriage at 10 weeks. My second cycle was a chemical pregnancy. I'm now on my 3rd and it's day 34 with no ovulation yet. I'm using Ovusense to temp which helps to show when I've ovulated. I can't help but worry it was a fluke to fall quickly like I did. Just wondering if there's anyone else in a similar situation struggling with long cycles as I'm finding it really frustrating. Looking forward to chatting to some of you! x

Hi @EssJayyCee just wondering how you are doing. Unfortunately I miscarried at 8 weeks so it's back to the start of this whole process again for me. Almost four weeks have passed now and I'm waiting impatiently to see how my cycle returns. It was a 50 day wait after my first loss so could be a while yet. I hope it's not going to be a return to really long and irregular cycles but guess only time will tell at the moment....

@Avocuddles I am so sorry to hear that!
I hope your body gets itself back to some kind of normality soon!

I am doing okay, I had my day 28 (day 30) blood test on friday then AF came on Saturday so I had a normal length cycle for a change! My BBT estimated I had ovulated as well but clearly I missed it if I did.
I have to wait until the 25th for my follow up appointment when I will find out if I definitely did ovulate or not. DP has had his SA and has his follow up appointment on the 17th hopefully after both of our appointments I will be referred and we will finally get somewhere!

I was so convinced I was pregnant before AF... My boobs and nipples were soo soo sore! But low nd behold the red witch arrived.

I had completely lost this thread! I tried to find it to see how everyone was but couldn't find it anywhere.

How are you doing @Catconfusion?

Hey @EssJayyCee I'm so sorry for the delay. For some reason I didn't get a notification. Just came across the thread again.

I'm 15 weeks now and all is looking great. I've been really ill with sickness so not been able to work or do much but baby is progressing well. I'm getting the odd good day now so I'm hoping it'll improve. It's really surreal being at this point almost like it's happening to someone else. We're so grateful and excited though. Baby is due on Easter Sunday next year.

I'm so pleased you and DP have had the tests and hopefully not far off getting some support. How did the SA go? Let us know how you get on with your appointment this week. I know you've had such a rough time but hopefully the solution is a simple one. Xx

@Catconfusion so glad to hear all is going well for you! It's brilliant to see you progressing through your 2nd trimester.

I had my first AF post mc2 over the weekend. I managed to get in for blood tests on Friday and have a HyCoSy appointment tomorrow, I'm a bit apprehensive about it as have read some horror stories online but will grit my teeth as know it's best to get everything checked out.

@EssJayyCee how are your investigations progressing?

Thanks @Avocuddles I do feel really lucky all is ok. I still get a bit anxious sometimes but I think that's the reality of pregnancy after loss.

It's great your having some tests done if anything for piece of mind all is ok. Also good AF has kicked in again. Are you tracking the cycle? Maybe things will be a bit more regular. How did the appointment go? Xx

Hey can I join in on the thread? (And hope some of the former good luck rubs off on to me ).

I’m waiting back on blood test results to look into whether I have PCOS, I’ve looked at my results online and by looking at the LH/FSH ratio I am pretty sure I do have it. My cycle generally never goes above 44 days, but I’m currently on day 51. It’s cruel because I keep thinking maybe this is it and I am pregnant, but I know deep down it’s probably just another irregular cycle . I know how you’re feeling @EssJayyCee x

@Catconfusion that is amazing news! I'm glad baby is progressing well I am so happy for you!

@Avocuddles that's good AF has started up again.. sorry to sound stupid by what is HyCoSy?

I have had results back. I didn't ovulate that cycle of blood tests and I'm pretty sure I haven't for any of my cycles since January because of my BBT shows little to no sign of it.. so that's bad news #1.

Bad news #2 my DP's SA wasn't brilliant either... there was a low sperm count although very active swimmers of the ones that were present.. he has to do another test in 3 months (JANUARY!) Because they don't like going off one test and its protocol to wait 3 months between tests

My doctor said she thinks we have to wait for that test before progressing but she said she would contact the gynaecologist to see if they wanted to see me before then. Otherwise... I have to wait until january too. I bloody hate all of the waiting! I just want to give up.

I have gained almost a stone in weight recently because I am so upset with everything and I just can't be bothered anymore. I feel so down. Nothing in my life if going well right now.

Glad you're both doing okay :)

@Pawsin I feel your pain 100%! I keep thinking I could be pregnant. But then AF will come. And now i know I'm not ovulating i know I'm definitely never going to be pregnant without help.. and even that's not certain! How long have you been trying?

Oh I forgot to say, We aren't convinced the SA results are reliable anyway because DP chose to DTD at the hospital where there was nowhere to do it but the toilet... and there was a loud bang at the time of release and it put him off so the sample wasn't as big as it would have normally been.. so we are hoping with tight fingers crossed that it was purely because of that!

I GOT MY REFERRAL LETTER TODAY!

13th November!

Let's hope they will do something for me 😁

@Catconfusion with your sister did she have an initial assessment with the gynae before she was prescribed Clomid or was she given it on her first appointment do you know?

@EssJayyCee that's great news, glad you have a date now. They will potentially want to do more tests before they give you meds but hopefully shouldn't be too long a wait. The HyCoSy involved putting us up through the cervix and around the Fallopian tubes to check for any blockages / abnormalities via ultrasound. It was quite painful but not as bad as I had expected based on some of the horror stories I'd read online! It's likely that they'll want you to have that or the equivalent if you haven't had it yet to rule out any physical abnormalities. Let us know how the appointment goes x

Ps @EssJayyCee my first fertility appointment basically just involved going through medical history and all the tests we've had previously, then being referred for the scan. I imagine the outcomes will vary depending on your own personal circumstances and location but in my area it seems that the initial appointments are always with an advanced nurse rather than a doctor.

@Avocuddles Oh right, I'm not sure I want a HyCoSy haha. I am worried I might have blockages because I sometimes have pain during sex which could be because of blockages or tissue in the wrong places.

Sounds like alot more waiting involved I am so impatient. We just want a baby so bad I'm fed up with all of the testing and the waiting in between. It's going to be the middle of next year before anything happens at this rate!

I have read alot about peoples first Gynae appointments and like you say, different areas seem to do different thing but most were just to go through history etc.

I'm quite nervous for my appointment.

@Avocuddles with your HyCoSy did you have to wait ages for the appointment?

I've just freaked myself out reading about peoples experiences with it and I'm scared now!

@EssJayyCee I was told the wait would be around 6 weeks but I called up to let them know some days I would be unable due to holidays and was fortunate to get offered an appointment that same week due to a cancellation. Honestly it wasn't anywhere near as bad as some of the experiences online had made me expect. I took painkillers about an hour before hand, I was a bit nervous and upset as being scanned internally reminded me of my miscarriages, but the nurses were lovely and held my hand and talked to me whilst the doctor was down the business end!
At the end of the day it's worth having done as medication wouldn't be helpful if there's a blockage in the way.

You will get your baby I'm sure! Once they're in your arms all the waiting will be worthwhile but It's so hard when you have no idea when that will be! I hope your first appointment is helpful and you don't have to wait too long for the next steps, whatever they may be....

@Avocuddles That's a little comforting to know it doesn't hurt as much as everyone said.
What is the process of the whole thing anyway? I can't really understand how they do it?

I know it will come in time. It's just the waiting process and hearing so many others getting pregnant all of the time. I am happy for them but I get upset as well.

@EssJayyCee I definitely get upset too. This weekend two members of my husband's close family announced their pregnancies. It'll be nice to have another niece or nephew but I feel devastated when I hear how happy everyone is and I wish that it could have been our turn. The miscarriages have made me feel really sad because I know that pregnancy will never be a happy or relaxed time for me as I will always be living in fear of another loss, but I need to try to be positive and hopeful that it might work out one day. It is only human for us to feel sad when we have reminders of what we're missing out on, but like you say hopefully we will get there eventually.

For the HyCoSy they put your feet up in stirrups then do an internal ultrasound - I'm not sure if you've had one already but it's best described as 'dildo cam!' The doctor then inserts a speculum (a bit like during a smear test) and then puts a fine tube up into your uterus which was uncomfortable but not agonising. The painful bit comes next when they flush dye up into you and all round your tubes. It felt like a really bad cramp for maybe a minute and then it was all over.i was left a bit shaky but recovered within a few minutes - I think my DH was more nervous than I was!!!

Thank you @Avocuddles that us quite comforting to read that. I was expecting all sorts ! That doesn't sound so bad. I have a relatively high pain threshold so I should be ok I think..

Did you leak and bleed alot afterwards?

@EssJayyCee I didn't have any bleeding at all afterwards, and only leaked a little on the pad they give you - I was back to 'normal' within an hour. I reckon a high pain threshold is useful during this process but honestly it wasn't that bad....

Hey @EssJayyCee it was a long time ago but I saw my sister recently and she said it was actually metaformin and she got it from the nhs fertility clinic on her second visit after tests showed her hormones were imbalanced due to pcos. I think it stabilises blood sugar which in turn makes hormones steadier. She fell pregnant the first cycle on it after trying for a year and not feeling like she was ovulating before that.

My Mum got Clomid from her GP in 1972 not long after it was invented. Crazy considering it can overstimulate your ovaries. Now they will monitor you with ultrasound during the cycle you take it. I'm not sure which appointment you will get a prescription as each clinic is different. Good luck with your tests and appointments. I've got a really good feeling it will work out just fine. Xx

@Avocuddles I'm just so sorry for everything you've been through. It's so hard trying again after loss, especially with confusing cycles. I completely relate to what you said about it all being worth it when that baby is in your arms. I still have a way to go but I have a feeling all the sadness and worry will melt away in that moment. Being pregnant again after loss is tough but it's one step closer to being a Mum. I'm 17 weeks now but after my two losses I'm still scared it'll all go wrong. I really hope you get some good news soon! Xx

@Catconfusion @Avocuddles thank you both for sticking by me through all this. I honestly wouldn't know how I'd have got through some of it without having you to talk me through!

Hey @EssJayyCee no problem. It’s good to talk to others who understand messed up cycles. It can really affect your self esteem. I know I’ve felt abnormal compared with friends and maybe Even less of a woman in some respects. The truth is I was wrong. Yes it’s less common to have irregular cycles but I’m still a woman capable of having babies. Statistics show that most women with pcos will have a baby at some point, it’s just a bit trickier. You’ll get there! Xx

@Avocuddles and @Catconfusion
So I had my gynae appointment today...

I have to have one more lot of blood tests to see if I am ovulating. I will have another appointment in 6-8 weeks (but that is over christmas so I bet it will end up being more like 10-12 weeks 😑) to discuss my results.

If they find I am ovulating, they will check my tubes for blockages through laparoscopy.

If they find I am not ovulating I will be given medication to stimulate ovulation and given the option of having my tubes checked too which I think I will have just so it's done and another thing checked off the list that's possibly preventing things.

I feel so much more positive now I know what the future steps are.
It's still more baby steps but at least I'm getting there now. 😊

How are you both doing? Xx

Hey @EssJayCee that’s fantastic news. So glad you’re getting offered help and hopefully treatment soon. I think often it’s that feeling of not moving forward that brings you down. I have a feeling it won’t be too long once all the tests are done.

I’m doing well thanks. I’m 18 weeks now and thankfully stopped being sick. I am having some joint issues though as I have arthritis in my hips. My bump is quite big already so getting a lot of pressure and pain. I’m having physio though and it will all be worth it. I’ll probably need a c section but I’m fine with that.

Keep us posted on how the tests go. Hopefully it will be good news and a simple solution! Xx

@EssJayyCee that all sounds very positive, I hope the wait is more like the 6-8 weeks rather than any longer. If you don't get a date through soon then give them a ring and if you're lucky you might manage to get in sooner if they've had any cancellations....

My appointment to discuss my various tests came through for next week but as I'm on holiday then I declined it and am waiting for another one.
We took a break off trying to conceive this month but we're going to start again next cycle (hopefully within the next couple of weeks....). I'm scared of not being able to conceive, but more than that I'm scared of conceiving and then miscarrying for a third time. We're now eighteen months into this journey and I turned 36 this week. I'm hoping this might be my year.....

Keep us posted with your progress!