2WW... The longest wait

[guinicorn]

Hi, I was just feeling a bit down in my 2ww and wanted to share a bit. I'm trying so hard not to symptom spot but it's impossible.

Im around 7 or 8dpo, I couldn't pinpoint the actual day as LH tests were inconclusive, CM got very watery one day and the next seem thicker so I'm hoping that's when I ovulate. I have sore boobs, slight backache, weird ache very low down in my abdomen, almost like an internal bruise. If I stand, sit or bend then I feel it ache.

Cervix is high and soft, creamy CM, little bit of nausea but that's probably because I'm working myself up... I stupidly did a test this morning which was a bfn so feeling even worse now!

I know everyone else feels the same way but I wish I just knew one way or another... I'm 35 so worried that's affecting my fertility too.

Thanks, just needed to vent a bit x

Really sorry to hear that @Helensss glad you have friends with wine ❤️

@Avf88 yes I have a good network round me. May have had a bit too much wine last night! But I think I needed it. Keen to get this appointment booked, my dr is phoning me at lunchtime and hopefully she can refer me. How are you? Did af show up? xx

@Helensss I think wine always give me the worst hangovers! That’s good about the doctors, fingers crossed something comes out of it. I’m ok, still no AF though... still symptom spotting. Will test again in a few more days

Got my appointment through, 25th September feels like ages away!! Not sure why they said there’s a 2 week wait 😔 but glad it’s booked. Hope everyone’s ok today! X

Argh, annoying but like you say, at least it's booked. It will soon come around. Are you going to try again this month or wait until after the appointment? Had my 20 week scan yesterday, all good thank goodness xx

Yeah I think we’ll just take it as it comes this month, like not time it on purpose but if it happens it happens. Last time it took a while to ovulate again, like 4 weeks but I’ve pretty much stopped bleeding now. Oh really yay! And it’s def a girl? So exciting xx

Glad you’ve got an appointment sorted!

Yes defo a girl! The sonographer confirmed it but she said the harmony test was more accurate than her anyway 😊 I finally bought a couple of girls babygro's yesterday in the Mothercare sale. Can't quite believe we've got this far on the first time of trying after DS, after everything that happened before.

Taking it as it comes sounds like a v sensible approach this month. Hope you get some answers at your appointment, you'll have to let us know what they say xx

Not first time trying after DS, but first pregnancy after DS I should have said. Xx

Sorry to jump on this post! Every month I have very obvious ovulation, EWCM, o pain and sore boobs after. This month I'm on cd 20 and I've had none of that. However, I have had lots of creamy cm yesterday's nd today which is typical after ovulation. Just looking for opinions really

Morning All!

I'm feeling really down today, according to my app i'm due on this weekend - I've been feeling quite queasy and bloated for a few days and had lots of mild cramping for a week - so I took a FR test this morning and was a BFN.

Might be too early? (6 days before AF) but I am sure i'd see a faint line if there was anything. We really did everything we could this cycle and I def ovulated. Back to the drawing board!

Trying to keep positive is really hard :(

I got a negative first response 4 days before period was due and only got a positive after so you’re not out yet!

Hello again all!, been trying to stay off of all things ‘ovulation and baby making’ in hopes that I would become less as obsessive over tracking it all.

As I said previously I was symptom spotting and everything lead to ‘I must be pregnant’ as I hadn’t had AF throughout the whole time I had my implant I completely forgot what it was like to have one (after 5+ years), well AF certainly arrived the other day and is just settling now.

Gutted but was not completely unexpected as kept getting BFN each time I tested, glad in a sense that I now remember what AF symptoms are and roughly when I should expect it so I can keep an eye on it this month, ovulated around the 17/18th last month so guessing this month should be the same but trying to DTD with OH every night just to be sure!.

Before I know it the dreaded 2WW will be back!, how is everyone else getting on?x

How you getting on @CSB15 ??

I’m ok, my best friend told me yesterday she is pregnant with her 2nd (her 1st is only 10 months) and her due date will be a week after mine would have been, I found that really difficult to hear, had to have a wander round the town for a bit or I was going to cry at work! She was very sensitive about it and is a great friend but it really threw me. Xx

@helensss I’m sorry to read about what’s been happening, I’m not getting notifications on new posts anymore so when I remember I’m dipping in.

Unfortunately other people do share their excitement of new babies due just when your off guard, but your response is completely normal. I had the same with a work colleague, and one I’d say at the time was ‘least deserving of a child when I was so desperate’. On reflection I was being very mean but hurt makes us feel like that.
I had a thing about teenagers having babies - like why could they have one when they couldn’t afford one/had no home of their own/no job/no long term partner etc. I used to literally drive myself around the bend with the hurt and jealousy.
The thing is, when you do get your baby as I’m absolutely sure you will - you’ll look back and realise that the baby you got was definitely worth all the pain, the hurt, the tears, and ultimately the long wait.
In the meantime don’t bottle up your emotions. Get them out and replace them with more positive energy. X

@sauty thank you for such a lovely message, the end bit made me feel a bit emotional, I think I’m doing ok really, my friends keep saying “you’re so strong and amazing” but i have no other option than to be like that,
I can’t break down and be negative, I have to stay positive and hopeful or I’ll drive myself mad. I guess you don’t know how it feels until it’s happening to you. How are you doing? xx

No ones response to m/c is the same. When I had my first (of 4 in total), it totally broke me I’ll be honest. My mums response will haunt me forever, but my Dad (who never showed any form of compassion or emotion) rang me to see how I was. That was the most heartfelt thing ever to me and I’ll always think of that fondly as it really showed he loved me. 😍
People think your brave, strong etc... and it’s a nice, positive thing to say to someone who’s crumbling on the inside, but you don’t need to live up to any expectations. If you need a five minute cry, have it. If you need to stay in bed all weekend eating pringles then do it. Just allow yourself to heal in your own time. No one else’s.
So as I was saying, my first m/c broke me totally. Oddly though, my 2nd wasn’t as bad, third was gutting but not as bad as first and by my 4th I was just ‘Here we go again’.
I’ve kind of come to the realisation that these things happen when your least expecting it to. Just like when I was much younger, waiting for a bus to take me to work, guaranteed it would come just as I’d lit up a cigarette. It’s the one way I could guarantee the bus came!! Lol.
(I quit smoking years ago btw, got myself a drivers licence and sacked off the buses). 😄

How you respond to others news of babies is your response alone, and there no compromise as far as I’m concerned, your first reaction is your gut reaction. But the world carries on and eventually, we all catch up. Your at a bump in the road that’s all but don’t worry about it, your going to be absolutely fine in time.

I’m ok though thank you. After losing both my dogs to terminal illnesses earlier in the year, I’ve begged and begged the hubby and (I don’t doubt) a bit of emotional blackmail, got myself a cute little Puppy. My periods are all over the place, anywhere from between 21 days to 31 days. I’m sick of ovulation sticks and symptom spotting, but most of all I’m fed up with the disappointment. So I’ve shifted it to one side to enjoy nicer things. X

Everyone - this is Dexter, my Frug. 😍

Oh my god I know, seeing heavily pregnant women smoking and just being vile makes me soooo angry!!! Like how did their intoxicated bodies manage to hold a baby but mine hasn’t yet. I know that’s just my thoughts being silly though.

Well now you’ve chilled out about it you never know! We didn’t technically try the last time and it was actually after a bit of a boozy wedding when it happened.

Sorry to hear about your dogs, that must have been so hard however your puppy is absolutely adorable!! X

This is my scruff bag goldendoodle!

OMG HES SO LOVELY!! 😍😍😍

Just going back to your last post, I had to smile about seeing pregnant women smoking - that too was one of my pet peevs and my exact thoughts!! Thank goodness I’m not the only one.😤
The teens that I got mad at for being pregnant were the same ones I’d see drinking blue WKD in the Park, with a different love interest weekly.

What’s worth remembering though is that babies are not a reward, we don’t get them for good or for bad behaviour. I’ve no doubt in my head the girls I’m referring to had no idea of the outcome of their actions and the thought of making a baby or conceiving never crossed their minds whilst they were up to whatever in the bushes (😂).
And being totally relaxed about it is exactly how you conceived your last baby and how I conceived my youngest. Not trying, not worrying, not obsessing.
I probably harping on now. I just wanted you to know that I ‘get it’ with regards to your emotions and how your figuring out how you feel about things, but be kind on yourself and grieve under no pressure of a time frame.

@sauty yes you are absolutely right I am going to try and relax and really hope for a positive outcome next time, going to be a worry but I’ll try stay positive!

Thank you, you’ve helped me today! X

@Helensss that’s good, I hope I’ve helped you even if I do go on a bit. I just hate how we all tie ourselves in knots of pain, hurt and isolation sometimes, it’s really no good for our mental health and well-being. We are our own worst critics, but we shouldn’t be. We’re all Fabulous we just sometimes forget it.

Just found out I’m pregnant on an early response again, 11dpo and so so scared 😭

Hi everyone sorry I did not get notifications, so I thought everyone was off doing there own thing. How are we all xx