35+ TTC#1 Thread 6

[BambiOnIce80]

Spring is in the air and it's time for a new thread!

Basically: a wonderful bunch of ladies supporting each other through the TTC journey when trying for a first baby after 35.

Here's hoping we get some spring BFP luck for all of us!! 🍀🐣🍀🐣

It was soooooo relaxing, thanks for asking @Carley32 😊 I am a lover of a de-stressing bath, and the free standing bath in our room and the accompanying view was heavenly (bath porn attached! 🛀😉) 😇 Back to reality/work tomorrow though 😏

2 more months to wait compared to £150 & a 1 week wait 🤔 Getting ahead and getting a consultation/internal exam/SA for £150 sounds like it could be worth it for peace of mind. I'm guessing you may not need to pay for bloods if they've already done them at the GP (albeit they've been crap at talking you through them 😒). Then again, can't argue with your logic of giving it another month because of the heavier AF... we could all do with a crystal ball, couldn't we?! 🔮

Mini-update on the sex strike - DP came back to an email when he went back to work last night, saying his horrid temporary continental shifts (which have been stressing him out) are going to be finishing early on the 15th of March instead of mid-April 🎉😁🎉😁 The 15th of March should be the middle of FW and he should've been on a bank of 4 night shifts, but now he's off 😊 On top of that he's somehow managed to lose 3kg, so I'm tentatively optimistic that a return to normal DTD service may be on the cards 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻 Still not going to tell him when it's FW though, just to keep the pressure off as much as possible 👍

Hi all, may I join? @PixieN pointed me in your direction.

I'm 39, 40 in July and have been TTC #1 since autumn 2017. Fell pregnant in jan 2018 but sadly my little bean didn't grow past 6 weeks but my body didn't realise -missed miscarriage was diagnosed at a private scan at 9 weeks. It took another three months for the mc to complete and I was incredibly lucky and fell pregnant end of July. Sadly same thing again. Only slight diff was a tiny bit of brown cm at around 6 weeks. Found out my little bow lasted just one day more than bean (4.2mm against bean's 3.1mm) at my early scan at 9 weeks.

I'd been on the pill since age 18 until just after my 38th birthday, so I have no idea what's normal for my cycles at all. I know my luteal phase is 12/13 days but at the mo my ovulation isn't consistent.

So desperate to be a mom it consumes me. And to think when we started this we just thought, ah well we'll see what happens, and if it doesn't no biggie. I miss the freedom of that attitude.

@birdbybird approximately 19 cycles, 14 months. Officially, but been off the pill 2 years, with a short stint of actively avoiding, then not trying/not avoiding for a bit.

@bambionice80 OPK was blazing Saturday morning, then by late afternoon had faded a bit. I got home from spin this morning to quite a heavy bleed. Very much like AF. And I'm still bleeding a bit - enough to need a pad. Could this be an ovulation bleed? It was quite heavy, bug timing-wise it surely must be. I'm convinced it's because they were in futering around with my insides the other week. Don't now where this leaves me wrt my cycle. Temps have been slowly rising the past few days, but nothing significant. Hoping for a proper rise tomorrow morning. Just need to pin OH down one more time before then (Soz, TMI!!).

Welcome @Laney79 👋 So sorry to hear about what you've been through - I simply can't imagine 😔 I miss the freedom of the 'Che serà, serà' attitude too. It does still come and go, but I'm currently in the grips of a 'please, please let it happen 🙏' mood. Quite unusual during AF (I'm usually more 'sod it, let's just take it as a sign and get a puppy' during AF 🐶), but I'm wondering if it's because we missed FW last cycle so I didn't have my usual bit of hope 🤔 Whatever the cause, I'm hoping the SI's I'm taking over the next few days will cheer me up a bit! 😂 What CD are you on at the moment?

I've never had ov bleeding either @CNizzle, but I've read it can be fairly heavy and need a pad. Definitely sounds like you should grab DP and get him pinned!x

@Carley32 £150 for a consultation and those tests sounds like a bargain. I've just paid £250 just for blood tests privately (miscarriage related that the nhs won't do until you have three losses) no consultation so that sounds like a good price to me.

@BambiOnIce80 thanks for the welcome. I'm cd14 at the moment but I'm a bit worried about ovulation-fearing an anovulatory cycle as I'm on day 5 of flashing smiley on my clear blue connected opk and have only ever had max of four before peak before. Typical as we've done brilliantly on the DTD front this week.

Wow that looks perfect @BambiOnIce80 I am a fan of a de-stressing bath too, and that would certainly fit the bill!

Great news about DPs shift change too. It sounds as if everything is going in the right direction. 🤞.
We were half inclined to not test this month and just go for it every 2/3 days. DP seems up for it now, but not sure if it’ll last and then with my cycles being so long, we may end up not getting to fw.

Yea it does seem good value I suppose. I just didn’t want it to put discomfort or presssure on us during probably the most normal cycle Iv had. A crystal ball would be amazing!

Hi @Laney79 sorry to hear how hard you’ve had it. I hope you get your bfp soon xx

@CNizzle that is odd. I did get a bfp OPK a few days before af started, which I fouled bizarre too. Only on cd6 here so can’t really comment further though.

@Laney79 Glad you found us - it’s such a lovely, supportive thread 💕 Really hope you get a positive outcome after what you’ve been through x

@findingmyfeet12 Sorry to hear your story and welcome to the thread 💐

@BambiOnIce Lovely pics - that looks like pure luxury, and what a view!

Had my 3rd scan today and it wasn't that straight forward. Follicles grow a bit too slow and have to carry on with stimulation and Cetrotide for 2 more days, trigger on Wednesday and egg collection on Friday morning. Trying not to think about anything really and take a day as it comes. Flying home tomorrow as planned. Unplanned break and all. My DD can spend more time with her grandpa.
@QuantumGirl How are you getting on?

Hi am new to this thread

Just got a postive test this morning! so happy and nervous :)

bit of our story
Will be 40 in november this year. we had a early MC in 2015 early in the relationship so were not that worried and started trying few months later. Nothing happend so in 2016 we got checked out, I have pcos and my DP low sperm count.

Because of our age the clinic said that it would be best to go directly to IFV, well we did in november 2017 and I got OHSS big time! 17 days in hospital and very very ill

So 2017 went into recovering from that, in 2018 when we were about to start ttc again I had to have a back surgery

so been cracy but we had IUI 2 weeks ago and am hoping this one will stick

super early yet but it was so great to see a postive test this morning

Hope everyone had a good weekend. Got rid of the ILs this morning and am now super tired! Thought we were just arriving in FW so had a couple of days to recover (CD9 today - natural cycles is predicting CD13 and haven't had my usual pre-ovulation temp dip yet) but bam, positive OPK this afternoon - arghhh! I usually have a few days of them getting stronger, but first sign of any colour at all was a very pale line yesterday. 😵 I guess we better crack on then - OH has decided to skip his 3 hour nightclass he does on a Monday evening 🤣

Looks like you had a good weekend @bambionice80 & good news about the potential easing of the sex strike 🤞👍

👋 To the new joiners on the thread!

Good luck on your IVF cycle @Russkispy 🤞🏻🍀

Did you get your static smiley @Laney79?🤞🏻

Congratulations on your happy news @CurrerBell1979 💐

I'm impressed with your DP's dedication to FW @Weathergirl1! 😄

Any news from your doc's appointment @QuantumGirl? I hope you're OK.x

@BambiOnIce80 sadly not, still flashing. I just don't understand -this is my 5th cycle post second loss which was natural and still they are all over the shop. The first loss was horrendous and drawn out but concerned cycles restarted they were regular at 26 days (well the two I had) but this is all over the shop making TTC impossible.

For those using clearblue opks with high/peak - what's the maximum amount of days you've got high (flashing) before you get a peak? And have you ever gone from high to low without a peak? I'm on CD16 and 7th day of flashing smiley. The instructions say if you get 9 days of flashing you can stop testing as it's unlikely you'll get a peak. X

Hi @Laney79 I use the CB adv OPK's - I have had five flashing smileys before getting a peak. I've only used it for the last two cycles. I'm also recovering after MMC. I'm on my third cycle after erpc. I think @Carley32 also had a long stint (6+) of flashing smileys until she got her peak. I hope you get yours soon

Hi @Laney79 ( I am also Carley 32, some days) and yes @Amanda81 I had 13 flashing smileys until I had my peak.... I wanted to poke that flashing bloody smiley with a big stick lol.

Yes @Weathergirl1! Best get cracking haha!

CD 8 here and still pondering with the idea of using opk's this month. also undecided weather to go private or to give it another chance.

So I know an internal exam or SA isn't to stressful but I cant help wondering if it would interfere with my cycle? I know I'm already irregular, but after this month I have a little hope at regaining some normality!

Hi Ladies, thank you for mentioning me. Went do the drs yesterday and it was as expected. There is NO chance I'm pregnant and she asked for fertility blood tests including prolactin which I will do on Friday. I am giving AF till Sunday to show up as it was due yesterday for the second month in a row and if nothing then I'm going for a private scan next week. After that I'm going on hols for 2 weeks whatever the outcome.

Sorry I haven't caught up with the rest of the thread but did notice we have a few newbies, welcome ladies 😍

@Carley32 (/@Carley321 😄), it sounds to me like you'd like to give yourself one more month seems you've just had your first nice and normal AF - can't blame you at all and it makes perfect sense to me 🙂 That private consultation will still be there in a month's time and the waiting time for an appointment will still likely be just 1 week, plus you'll have been back to your doc's for your blood results by then 👍 I'd ask the doc for a printed copy of your results when you go (I always do 🤓) , because that way you can take them with you to your private consultation if you decide to go ahead and do it 😉

AF really is being an elusive witch for you @QuantumGirl! 😕 Glad the doc has ordered you up some bloods to see what's going on 👍 Those private scans sound damn handy - I looked up the link @Russkispy gave us before and there's one 20 minutes walk from my front door! Going to hold off until I've seen the ACU doc in May, but I might get my follicles scanned if they didn't do it on my intrauterine US last month (think they did though because I mentioned my previous results and they said I definitely didn't have PCOS 😪). I hope AF gets her 💩 together and shows before next week for you though 🤞🏻 Where did you decide to go on holiday in the end? States or Brazil? I'm well jeal, whichever it is! 🤩

Thanks @Amanda81 and @Carley321 -13 flashing smileys? Jeez, that's awful. Was there any reason? My cycles just aren't settling after my second loss -it's really getting me down. Petrified it's menopause.

@BambiOnIce80 I also ask for copies of all my results. My vitamin D was a prime example. According to nhs range my level was adequate but when you look at the research it wasn't optimal for conception/pregnancy -it needed to be higher. My level was fine for general population but not for TTC. So I added an extra supplement and levels are much better. I always double check mine now just in case.

Hello All. Looking for a bit of advice. When should I test? This cycle has been slightly odd, but it could be the norm following MMC, and it all just settling down (cycle 3 after MMC). Anyway, my last two cycles have indicated that my LP is 11 days and FF has indicated ovulation on either Cd17 or Cd16. I would usually start spotting on 10dpo. I've had no spotting so far. This cycle I o'd on cd14, and I'm currently on 11dpo. So in theory due AF tomorrow. My cycles are usually 28 days. If my LP has lengthened I would be due AF on Sunday.

Generally I have been feeling well, but had cramps from 6dpo to 10dpo, all has stopped now with the cramping. Felt nauseous yesterday and have had some very strange dreams the last two nights. My temperature is on the rise, and usually by now it has plummeted.

So, if I am lucky enough to have caught, should I test tomorrow (based upon my LP from the last two cycles) or test on Sunday (cd28). 🤔🤔🤔

Not getting my hopes up (much 😳), but would appreciate any thoughts. I'm currently thinking I should wait it out until cd28 as it could be just one of those cycles.

Also, I have started taking the Ubiquinol this cycle and that could be playing tricks with me perhaps.

@Amanda81 I'd try and hold out if you can, if not I'd use a frer. Fingers crossed for you x

@Laney79, lab test results are my day job so there's no way I can cope with not being given a copy! 🤓 You're right though - GP's and the nurses do the best they can, but they're not all experts in fertility test result interpretation. I know from experience that they mostly just check if the number is within the stated reference range. If it is (and sometimes even if it's not!), then they label you 'normal'. Basically, they're not always right and as such I like to double check them 😬

@Amanda81, I'm a HPT-phobe because I find getting a BFN and then having to wait for AF to turn up upsets me way more than AF just turning up... but everyone is different! Hopefully a BFP is awaiting you, but if you're only 11dpo right now then I'd try and wait until 14dpo to get the most reliable result from whichever HPT you use (🤓).x

I am honestly just so torn @BambiOnIce80 DP sais to go for it but I’m still holding back thinking I don’t want to be fussed with after my last af lol. Anyway we are going to discuss and decide with a glass of wine Friday. Alcohol always puts things into perspective for us 😂. I will defo be asking for a printed copy and then asking you if their normal 😂. I’m interested to see for myself what their idea of ‘normal’ is.

Anyway hope you are doing ok, how’s Dps sex strike going?

@Laney79 how are the smileys?
I have no idea if there was a reason. I have quite irregular periods so I can’t be of much help to you. I did have bloods done the same month which confirmed I ovulated though. So I’m guessing the static was right. I’m unsure on weather to use them again this month. It can get quite expensive!

@Amanda81 if you have no reason to test. I’d definitely wait. I bloody hate seeing those 1 line bloody test strips 🙄 lol.

@Laney79 I had low vitamin D levels last year, as well as low B12 and iron levels. I’m having another blood test this week to check them again. The letter from the fertility clinic also said my TSH (autocorrect wants to keep changing this to t-shirt!!) was 3 and they like the level to be below 2.5 if you’re ttc 😳 I’m still waiting for a letter to book my HSG. Do you know what time of the month you’re supposed to have this? Wondering whether I need to chase as i’m due AF on Saturday.

@Amanda81 - i’d try to hold out on testing for a little longer. Good luck!🤞

@Carley32 Agreed that alcohol puts things into perspective. Definitely helps with decision making 🤪 😁

Thanks for the advice ladies. I will hold it out and see which comes first.

@PixieN I recently had done privately a Hycosy which I think is similar to an HSG. I had to call the clinic the first or second day of AF to book an appointment for that cycle. The clinic said a Hycosy is done before you ovulate and you cannot BD before it in that cycle. In fact the clinic had me do a pregnancy test right before to make sure there wasn't any chance I was pregnant.