Over 40 ttc - Autumn baby dust for me!

[Orchid222]

Here's our new thread, let's hope it's a lucky one!

Thanks Critter. I'll call my doc today and ask why I'm on a long protocol, read online that it increases the chances but I'll ask. At the end if the day I don't really care as long as it works, it's not that long- less than a month so I can live with that.

Wishing I think you are doing the right thing in telling your friend, although when I was pregnant I didn't tell my friend (because I asked opinion and was persuaded not to), who is having ivf and I miscarried so in hindsight maybe it was right not to tell her. It's a tough one - there's never a good time to break the news - but I like honesty. Maybe do it by text though rather than face to face - I used to think face to face would be better but from my own experience I would prefer a text - gives me chance to composer myself rather than fight back the tears when it's done in person...

Boosey goof luck to your Oh

Rose - any news? I'm struggling to keep up

I've got nothing to add re ivf treatments - clueless I'm afraid

I've just started taking predisnolone and progesterone pessaries, having seen Mr shehata - supposed to take from ovulation - I didn't get an LH surge and I've given up for the month - temp is rising so looks like I've ovulated? Got to wait now...

@Taxgirl1 think text is better... you can sob without the other person feeling like shit.. my sis told me over phone and I think I just put phone down on her.. my sis in law was via text.. best friend I was less upset by.. diff relationship I guess.. was so pleased for her x

@Taxgirl1 yes, I had surgical management on Tuesday. Currently feeling very low and shit.... is it worth going through this again... that’s the question.

He ladies, so a quick update, we didn't try this month, for no other reason than to see how I felt... and I felt ok. I'm not ready to announce the journey is over but I think I'm heading there rapidly. I think mentally I can always tell myself we could "try next month" but maybe never actually go through with it..... it's easier than saying that's it....
I'm so happy with my DC and grateful for them.....
I'm staying in this thread though because I need to hear your good news.....!
How are you doing Critter?

Oh @Rose68 I'm so sorry. It is shit. It hurts like crazy. It is exhausting. And then a little time passes and things seem better. Only you will know when you are ready to give up. Give it a little time. I don't know how much longer I can continue to try. I feel ok at the moment but it takes its toll on life, relationships and everything else. I don't know how much time to waste when I coukd just be enjoying what I've got. Where is the balance?

@Weasle that sounds like a very healthy approach and you sound happy. Great to hear.

Taxgirl - I had the same this cycle, no lh surge but temps say I ovulated.

Currently 9dpo but ava data is suggesting I'm out, which is fine as have fertility checks next month anyway. Also TCM guy is working on my progesterone this cycle so will be intresting to see if my LP is any longef than thr usual 11 days.

I went to see GP today to inform him of my recent chemical. He says I don't qualify for the recurrent mc clinic yet, and may not even if I have another one as there is lots of criterea to meet including if I already have children (my betting its more funding cuts) but he did say he would do some basic blood tests to check thyriod and anemia etc. And not once did he mention my age so I'm grateful for that!

Rose - sorry to hear you are feeling down about things, it is so gutting, I hope you have plenty of support and you start to feel more positive again soon.

Weasle - I understand where you are coming from, sometimes I feel like giving up too, I think it can be too all consumimg.
I think we have 2 camps here, those that say enough is enough and those that say sod this shit lets go full throttle and book IVF!! I've swung towards both directions on many occasions over the last year!

So many stories, good and bad. Hope everyone is ok.
AF arrived and day 2 I went back to doc. He has now put me on Gonal F injections for attempt #2 at IUI. I'm being positive. I've been 6 weeks on vitamin d supplements (level was 28.8 with range being 30-150), husband has been on his tablets for a month now (even after being on them for a week for iui#1 there was a big improvement in sperm so after a month, fingers crossed even better), I have 4 follicles on 1 side and 1 on other that he could see on Tuesday. Lots of love and hope to all xxxx

@Taxgirl1 thank you for your lovely comment. I have tears in my eyes again. It is so exhausting, I slept all afternoon yesterday, but I haven’t allowed myself to do that today.
I hope everyone else is doing okay. xxx

@Rose68 - I’m so sorry you had to go through that - I cant imagine how it must feel. I do hope you are looking after yourself and healing xxxx

@Weasledee - thanks for asking. I’m doing ok - 9 weeks today and have a scan tomorrow. If all is well and the OHSS has settled enough they’ll discharge me off to the nhs afterwards. Had first midwife appointment yesterday - they are coming to do a home visit next week?! That seems weird - no one else I’ve talked to has had that at 10 weeks? I think it must be different in Wales maybe? Anyway she left me with a huge book full of forms to fill in (45 pages) before they come so have a busy weekend ahead lol. I’m glad you’re feeling good about where you’re at with TTC at the moment - it can be so all consuming and it must feel nice to reach a state of peace with it all 😊

@Booseysmom - hope everything works out well for your DH!

Cleo, Orchid, Russkispy and Presh good luck with your current/upcom8ng treatments!

Hope everyone else is doing ok too! So sorry if I missed anyone!

Ooh @Rose68 sending big big hugs.. not had intervention but lost one at 9 weeks.. take it easy and let the tears flood out.. it helps the healing.. oh @Presh12345 sorry for af arrival.. fingers crossed for iui..
glad everything is cooking nicely @CritterTamer
@Taxgirl1 we are neither.. not giving up or down the ivf route.. just enjoying a regular sex life unprotected.. not getting too stressed but seem to be very tired all the time.. 🤦‍♀️
@Cleozeta glad dr didn't go down age route..
have I covered everyone.. big love and we need a new thread soon 💕

Totally agree cleo for us I wouldn't go down the IVF route with having the 2 DC already, I'd rather spend that money on them.... that's just a personal choice for us...However if I had no DC I'd definitely give it a try, nothing ventured nothing gained and all that...

Weasle I think that is a very good point very well made xxx

Am I being selfish thinking of IVF with 2dc already? I have wondered that before. I keep going back and forth with it

Cleo no you're not being selfish, you're potentially giving your DC another sibling so that's far from selfish!!! :)
It's just not for me at this point in my life....

Oh Rose I’m so sorry. You must feel like the bottom of your world has dropped out. All I can say is take time to grieve and really look after yourself. There is light I promise x

Presh - good luck for the next iui hun. Can I please ask what tablets your DH is on?

Weasel - I can understand your feelings completely. It’s just too hard sometimes isn’t it. I’m not quite ready personally to stop ttc yet but like you I wouldn’t do ivf with my two DC. Not so much for the money side of things but just the huge emotional and physical toll it takes. I couldn’t cope I don’t think. But Cleo that does not mean I remotely think you’re selfish. We all do what is right for us and our families. I’m like Chat. Just going to continue having unprotected sex, take my supps, enjoy lovely alternative therapies and pray for a miracle.

To everyone on this page, so many and feeling emotional for all of you. At 40 I am sat thinking how have I left it all so late. For me I have 1 ds already and at 16 thought I was done but only down to life and circumstance. Having met my DH late and him having no children it kind of stirred something i thought I had dealt with. Not one of you are selfish even if you have Dc. I feel privaliged to have one already but have tried to set limit of ivf. In reality now seed is sown not sure how I will cope if it doesn’t happen. It’s such an emotional journey for us all. In my head I will give it all for two cycles and then hope I can draw a line. Not sure how I’m gonna cope when treatment starts but feel good to have support from others who have been there. I have so many friends who have done this been down the path and then at 43 and 46 fell pregnant naturally so I have hope. I know it’s a rareity but I have to try. If I look back in 5 years regardless of cost I know I have done what I could and the outcome will be what it is. Doesn’t make it easy for any of us though. Big love to all who are going through the this x

What a lovely message Reality. I agree 100%. That deep urge for a child is such a natural thing no matter how many children you have.

Taxgirl1 thank you. She's on holiday at the moment but when she's back I'll tell her. Over text initially yes think that's best..

Rose, so sorry you went through that. Been there its so very sad. But we put ourselves through this time and time again because we are strong and we are fighters and we refuse to give up.. stay strong x

Not at all @Cleozeta... that desire/ ache for another baby is very real... it doesn't matter if it's 1, 3, 5 or 21 like that lady with the largest family.. I ache is strong

Ladies Holland and Barrett are black fridaying.. up to 70% off vits and supplements!!

Thanks Chat good to know

@Taxgirl1 & @CritterTamer ..thank you for your good luck wishes. ..DH has another interview coming up now! That's two! He's battling with his nerves atm. He has to prep a lesson and do a presentation. Good grief I'd be a wreck!!

@Rose68..sending you love and kind thoughts x

@weasledee & @ Realitysucks.. I hear you!
When do you call it a day? I am so close to that point now being 46. I have dreams of a baby girl though..I would call her Rae-ellen. Only DH doesn't like it

In bed atm with a cold bug and can feel AF looming only managed dtd twice this cycle. Poor effort I know but that painful ovulation (if that's what it was) prevented further attempts.

Extra thoughts for you Rose. It's so hard.

I can also relate to the thoughts of 'how much and how long' to keep trying. I am so lucky to have one DC who honestly is everything I could hope for in a child but not giving him a sibling really hurts. It feels so wrong to me and so incomplete having a one child family. Maybe it's just me but growing up I didn't really know any 'only children'. I understand those of you like Cleo who want a third. I would too if I had two already. I think 3 is a perfect number. When I got preg first try when my DC was only 7 months (ended in MMC) I really thought I had a chance of 3 and got so ahead of myself but now I'm just praying for #2. Keeping hope up is getting hard and I'm only on cycle 9. AF came yesterday.