TTC after recurrent miscarriage - thread 3

[Miami81]

Hi all. Sorry I hadn't realised other thread was full.
Have tagged who I can remember.
Please add people in.
@AnneLovesGilbert @Labmum @Hopefulforourrainbow @zarala

Oh wow! Such a bright rainbow. Thanks @Laney79. It seems to have stopped again so far. Had gone almost 2 weeks without any. I'll keep everything crossed for you @lauraliverpool. Hope you get your bfp.

Hey,

I thought the thread had gone quiet too, I was going to check in tomorrow night if no one had posted.

@hopefulforarainbow - ask if you can bring you scan forward. EPAU often have spare slots everyday. You have had some bleeding, which is perfectly valid. Please check this out especially if it continues - waiting until Thursday will drive you spare!

My own update: full blown nausea has hit me this week, it feels like I’m on a boat 18 hours a day 🤢. There are days when it’s much worse than others, and on the better days I’m sick with worry that things aren’t working out. I’m trying not to read into symphoms, I’m aware that they are actually are pretty meaningless. I’ve had this before when it didn’t work it, plus with my DD my symptoms were actually extremely mild.

I’m driving myself nuts so I caved this afternoon and booked for a early scan at a private clinic. I have to know what’s going on in there. I’ve not had any bleeding, so would feel guilty calling epau and going on the NHS - I was only there 10 days ago!
I have had 2 missed mc, but anything isn’t right I’m able to call epau right away.

I read an old zombie thread and a poster (who had 5/6 scans by 16 weeks) simply said: do whatever it takes to get through the 1st trimester after rmc.

Think of you hopeful please let us know how you are getting on xx

Argh......I was there a week ago!

Why is time going by so slowly?? 😩

I meant to say, I will only have only 10 days between scans!! I know this is a bit ridiculous, but no judging me too harshly!

I know I’m a bit crackers.....but I’m just very very anxious!

@Hopeful I love rainbow's and always take them as a positive sign. Thank you. 💐 Xx

I had been starting to feel so positive about things this time. My symptoms have been coming and going which I've been told is completely normal. Hubby' s flight has been cancelled for tomorrow so will be Monday night at earliest he's home now. No point in changing scan til I know when he's home unless things become worse. I was told by EPU last time that next time I'm pregnant they would scan me as often as I want. Surely they'd do that for you too @curly?

O no @hopefulforarainbow - I hope he’ll be home on Monday night! You are right to wait until he’s home though!

My EPAU told me not to hesitate coming in if I feel that something isn’t right. I just feel that I’ve been in there so alot this year .

Like you, I’m starting to feel a little more positive and don’t want to waste their time if everything is okay.

I’ve been through a bad scan privately already, so I can manage if it happens again - I’ll be straight in again.

I’m in on Thursday as well - please let it be okay for the both of us.......

Oh I really hope so. I think it'll be so much worse if I do miscarry again after seeing a heartbeat. I haven't had a good scan before the one a couple of weeks aho. Let's try to stay positive! Ignorance is bliss really. I don't think all the googling I'm doing is helping! I've instantly become happier after seeing the coca cola advert! Simple things lol

Hey @Hopefulforourrainbow how are you doing? X

Hey I'm ok thanks. Hope I'm not tempting fate saying this but no further spotting so far. Think I'm 9+4 today. Tiredness seems to be my main symptom. Nauseous at times, could be worried sick though! Hubby getting home tonight so looking forward to that. Haven't changed scan appointment. Will stick to Thursday unless things change before then. Thank you for asking. How are you all doing? I can't keep track of who's at what stage. How are you feeling @curlytwirlytwos?

Hey @Hopefulforarainbow, I’m okay thank you! I’m also desperately tired. I’m glad there’s no further spotting from you, fingers crossed things are developing well - I’m sure they are!

Nausea comes and goes for me, today wasn’t too bad (yesterday was awful) - but I’m to tired to stress about it today! I had a counselling session this morning, which has helped to calm me down and also made me feel more optimistic. Either way, there will be some resolution by the end of week!

How is everyone else? @Lauraliverpool - have you tested yet or are you holding it off? Fingers crossed, soon you’ll be in this stressful early stages too soon!

@moonpeace how is your early preg going so far?

It’s a nerve wracking time - I’m still (officially) only 7 weeks 😫 time is ticking by so slowly!

I'm hoping I'll measure further ahead on Thursday! That happened to my friend. She had an early scan then measured a full week ahead at her next scan! Her baby boy arrived a few weeks ago. Poor hubby is on his way home and I'm desperate to sleep. Sex has been a no no since bfp. I think he's struggling with that but I'm so terrified of bleeding! Anyone else the same?

@CurlyTwirlyTwos I think AF is starting, brown spotting today with the backache and dull cramps, was holding out hope that it might have been implantation, will see what it's like tomorrow, according to fertility monitor AF due in two days and then was going to test to see if I was pregnant. Spoke to hubby last night and said if I'm not pregnant then use the monitor again and he said as soon as I get the first high reading we'll get going again and I said each day and also the peak reading and the day afterwards, he said he read as soon as you get the high to start then and he said that he's at fault we missed a few of the high days and we did it too late, I thought we might have stood a chance this month as we dtd both peak days and the day afterwards, thinking about it for a good few days after my boobs were still quite sore so im wondering if I ovulated round then, I'm thinking of going to get the blood test done for ovulation, last cycle was 25 days and I don't know what day i should go on. I'm really hoping I'll be joining you soon with my bfp, I'm scared it's not going to happen again. Sorry for the long reply. Hope you're ok. Xx

I've told everyone I would go to if it went wrong. Close friends, my mum, my auntie and my brother. My boss also knows. It's much more supportive when some people know.

Ahhh @Lauraliverpool - waiting it out! I never got the hang of opks or monitoring in general, I never seem to get a positive! I’m now convinced that I actually ovulate much earlier that ‘normal’ and missed ov for months. We didn’t dtd in FW this time (I planned to avoid pregnancy until after Christmas) yet this is the one which is sticking.

@moonpeace I’ve told my sister, mum, two close friends and my counsellor about this preg! I have not told my work, and don’t intend to unless things go wrong.

I’ve kept the all the previous pregnancies ‘quiet’ but the strain on myself and DH has been immense. I know I have support now if things don’t work out. I shared the last early mc in August with all of the above and told them I’ve been struggling with rmc. Everyone was absolutely mortified that we’ve been struggling alone. It’s been a relief to admit it to be honest, and some the weight lifted. I feel better too - I don’t have to pretend that all is well!

Social occasions: I’m lucky I already a DD so I’m saying I can’t find a babysitter, and DH is out. I’m praying that I have a successful 12 week scan before the work Christmas party, and if I don’t, I’m going to be honest about.

@CurlyTwirlyTwos it's a total head wrecker tracking ovulation, I'm thinking I'm either not ovulating or if I am it's a few days after I get the peak and we only DTD three days this cycle. X

Glad the spotting has stopped @Hopefulforourrainbow -fingers crossed for your scan

Glad the counselling is helping @CurlyTwirlyTwos I find mine useful if only for the release. Nice to be able to offload freely without worrying about upsetting anyone.

@Lauraliverpool fingers crossed AF stays away

@moonpeace Hoping it all goes ok for you.

I'm in the tww. Finally got positive opks end of last week after worrying my body wasn't kicking back in after my second MMC losing bow. Was a bit odd though. Had clearblue positive with fmu thurs morning (although the lines didn't look as they would on an IC) did an IC with second wee of the day and it was getting there but not what I'd call positive, the ic one at 1800 on thurs was positive or very close to. So fri I test with fmu and both clearblue and ic are positive...so thinking deffo Ovulate Friday eve. Ic Tests stay positive though, right through Friday and still positive sat eve! Finally went negative 3pm Sunday.

So no idea when I actually ovulated - Never had a lh surge/positive opks last 3 days before. We dtd fri eve/sat am but OH didn't finish, however did successfully dtd first thing Sunday. Other than that it was the Saturday before for last successful dtd. So thinking prob slim chance for conception (one too early the other too late) but who knows.

Two weeks tomorrow till I see the consultant and get my blood results. X

@Laney79 I'm hoping so, but somehow don't think she will stay away. X

Can I rejoin for a hand hold? I've been lurking for months.

I've had 4 early mcs all before 5wks. I got a surprise BFP yesterday, I have pcos so my cycles are haywire and I routinely test for reassurance. I think I conceived about 12 days ago, we haven't been 'trying' but not actively preventing either. CB test says 1-2 wks.

I'm absolutely terrified. I feel certain that in the next few days I'll start bleeding and I have no idea how I'll cope.

I was referred to RMC in June and seen for bloods in August. I had my consultant appointment booked for 10 days ago, but a few days before I got a letter recheduling it by a couple of days. I went along and say a gynae registrar, who said that not enough bloods had been requested initially. I was given fifteen new blood forms for day 21 of my cycle, a month away! After thI burst into tears and gave the receptionistse I would be re-booked for the RMC. I gave the receptionist a handwritten 2-side complaint and I've heard nothing. This shocks me, I'm an nhs nurse and we shit ourselves when we get a handwritten complaint.

I'm not sure what to do now. I know I should be asking for early scans, but I'm not sure if this is my GP or EPU? Is it worth asking for two sets of bloods to confirm hcg is rising? I've started myself on 75mg Asprin. I don't feel great doing this but it's not my fault I haven't seen the RMC consultant.

@SerenaOverjoyed big hug coming your way.. so, with the original appt for the rmc was there a consultant named on the letter? If so try ringing the consultants secretary. Explain what's happened and that you really need urgent advice from the specialist and if there's anyway they could give you a ring you'd really appreciate it (this is how I've ended up being tested by a consultant despite not having the required three mc's in a row-my gp suggested it. I was very upset on the phone but I got a call back the same day from the consultant) effectively you'd already be "under" the care of that consultant you see so depending on what they are like they may do it.

Alternatively I'd go with whichever has been more helpful in the past re: GP v EPU.

If it helps my consultant has said even without seeing any of my blood results if I get a BFP I should take baby aspirin. Seems to be a general consensus that it's unlikely to do harm but seems to help in some cases.

Keeping everything crossed for you xxx

Hi @Serena. Welcome back. Congratulations on your bfp. I found my first appointment at the rmc a waste of time and the professor I saw made it clear we were wasting his time. I complained and we were offered an appointment with someone else. He said more often than not there are no reasons for mc and that he couldn't see why we wouldn't go on to have a healthy baby. He suggested aspirin and cyclogest just so it felt like we are doing something. If i were you, I would contact rmc and see if you can get cyclogest and contact epu to see if they'll book You in for an early scan. That's what I did and because of my history they booked me in. I have another scan on Thursday from saying it was too long to wait between 7 and 12 weeks. Good luck!

Hi @SerenaOverjoyed, I remember your username too welcome back to the thread.

I would exactly as Laney suggests, technically you are already under their care. Secretaries hold all the power in my experience (and always seem to finish at 3pm ) Get on that phone, and don’t take no from anyone. The one thing I’ve learned in this process is that you can’t be shy or too patient or (I’m normally go with the flow or ‘trust the system’) which has cost me time.

I find my local EPAU much more helpful than the GP or midwives, but again that is different for each area, but you still will be too early for a scan at 4 weeks.

Good luck - and let us know how it goes xx

Was it rmc that recommended that dose to you @moonpeace? Midwife prescribed 5mg for me at booking appointment.

Woah, thanks for the brilliant advice Laney, hopefulforarainbow, CurlyTwirlyTwos and moonpeace. You've all helped me get through the first anxious day.

The number on my letter is for gynae reception. I called three times and it just rang out I'll be a bit more pushy tomorrow. I think knowing a scan is booked for 6-7wks would really help.

I'm sticking with the asprin and ordering that folic acid, thanks moonpeace.

I do feel better for not bleeding yet. It's so fucked up