TTC after stillbirth

[toots123]

Just wondering if anyone else is ttc after a stillbirth and wanted to join me on this very daunting journey?

[39Suzy]

Me too 😉 x

[LittleLuce37]

Morning all. Hi @toots123 I'm so sorry to hear about this.

I've just had to visit family in England as an emergency but travelling home today in time for fertile week 😂

I've been trying to message you but can't figure it out on the app 😂😂😂

How can I find the Facebook group? Xxx

[askingalways]

@LittleLuce37 it's such a pain - you can't PM on the app! I had the same problem and had to reset my password as I needed to log on the website and had forgotten it.

Travelling home for fertile week makes me think of driving home for Christmas! 😂

[LittleLuce37]

@askingalways I know 😂 shame a 5.5 hour train journey doesn't make you feel very sexy 😂

@toots123 I got you message hope the reply arrived thank you xxx

[askingalways]

I'm out this month 😞
AF has showed up one day later than expected.
Not as much pain and cramps as previous months so maybe that's a slight positive?

[Testar0ssa]

Hello, everyone. Sorry it's been so long. I was super busy with in laws staying and then at work and somewhere along the line, notifications stopped

I'm trying to catch up on everyone's news... I'll continue reading.

Still no positive for me. I'm beginning to wonder if I've ovulated. It's so frustrating because I got pregnant so easily last time, and the time before that, but now I'm watching like a hawk and (not so patiently) waiting for the end of each TWW, the positive is so elusive.

I'm back on a plateau again after some really big dips. I even tried tapping... or rather, I sat in a room crying for an hour while the lady tried to tell me how to tap. Just when you think you're dealing with it ok, the tsunami hits and you don't know when you'll ever feel ok or like yourself again.

Anyway, waves and hugs for everyone on the thread

[39Suzy]

@askingalways definitely a positive!

@tessa0ssa so good to hear from you and sorry you havent caught yet.... we are definitely due another BFP soon in this group 😁 Are your cycles regular? I definitely think my ovulation day moved slightly post-loss compared to before (although that is from a sample of one cycle which was normal and relying on O signs so no exact science). Other thing to consider (although sounds obvious) is are you doing it enough (throughout your cycle to catch any rouge eggs if its not as settled as you think!)? Wishing you lots of luck for this month

You will feel yourself one day, a different you but a new you. X

[Testar0ssa]

I was a day late, and despite telling myself not too, my mind jumped to ready formed fantasies of hope of another baby which I hadn't appreciated were there...only to be dashed again when AF turned up.

I've moved on from the equal hope/fear of a BFP to utter disappointment of when AF turns up.

Apologies for the downer-rightly or wrongly, I feel like you're the only ones I can say this stuff to.

[Miami81]

Oh @Testar0ssa I'm sorry. It's so hard when it's all you can think about. How long has it been since you started trying again?
I did loads of reflexology, fertility massage and acupuncture before we started ttc again, I know it's not for everyone but I felt that it was good self care time to spend on myself and to get back on good terms with my body again.

[PartyintheKitchen]

@Testar0ssa so sorry to hear that, hope you're ok. It's hard not to get excited and it's equally hard not to be very disappointed when AF turns up.

I agree with @Miami81 on the self care. I did acupuncture for a few months with a a lady who was an expert in fertility and loss. I'm not sure if it helped but it definitely gave me some much needed time out from the pressure I was putting myself under and that in itself was great. It was a bit like therapy and she was very kind with me which I think in hindsight I needed, some tlc.

Hope everyone else is doing ok? I'm literally tied together with string these days. DH on the road every week. Work totally nuts. I've had a bad run of my childminder calling in sick too. So it has all been a bit much for my preggo head to manage. I'm having mini meltdowns most days at the smallest things - purely because I'm knackered. On the most positive side though I'm now 15 weeks and bubs seems to be doing fine - amazing really.

Sending love to all, hope you're all ok xx

[Miami81]

Hi @PartyintheKitchen that sounds really intense. Hope you are managing.
Work is manic for me at the moment as well and I am struggling to care!!
Anomaly scan tomorrow at 20+6. Feels totally surreal really. Just hoping that everything is ok and as it should be.
I am more then halfway through now as I am only going to 37 weeks. Which again has a very strange feel to it.
But as I said to my mom on the phone earlier, I chose this, I feel incredibly lucky to have gotten pregnant again and now we just have to get through the days.
DH is struggling with when I have a whinge about how I am feeling. I get incredibly winded at the mo doing anything and he automatically thinks that catastrophe has happened. It was really interesting when he said that as I thought it was all in my head.
Anyway I hope you are all well. I hope those of you ttc don't mind me being on here.

[Testar0ssa]

Good luck for the scan @Miami81 today! I'm sure everything will be as it should be x

I haven't done any of therapy or massage or anything. It doesn't feel like 'me'... although I did do some tapping as my mate has recently trained and thought it would help. I basically cried for the hour. I guess that tells me that all the shit is still bubbling away very close to the surface. and what a lovely image that is.

I'm trying to make the most of the occasional treat and otherwise keeping myself busy. Ive been doing a lot of extra effort cooking and baking, and also trying to get some exercise (I was doing close to none before) and watching what I eat and drink. Walking full time though with a two year old at home though doesn't leave much time for though.

Speaking of treats though, I'm off to London tonight for Christmas shopping tomorrow so will be Having Fun then, and at least I can make the most of the alcohol on offer this year while doing so!

Have a good weekend ladies x

[39Suzy]

@tesrar0essa i am sorry about AF ☹ that is a great start in aiming to be a bit healthier and i am sure it will do the trick very soon 😘 feel free to rant on here.... we are all here for you x

@partyinthekitchen i am feeling knackered still too (16+3). In fact i have had a two hour nap this afternoon! Although i am not sleeping too well with so much going through my head so i think it is taking its toll. Have you got any time off coming up?

@miami81 hope the scan went well! Are you planning on finding out what gender it is? We have our early anomoly on Monday which thankfully has come around quick (i still cannot believe i am pregnant) but feeling apprehensive too. It is just another step we have to take. I get the overwhelming feeling and it is other people's excitement i just cant / dont want to deal with. I havent told the majority of work collegues yet but most of my friends know. I have made it clear that this road is filled with anxiety and stress and not the usual pregnancy excitement and have left us alone which is what we need. A few have done the 'oh you are past the 12 week mark so everything is ok now' but i have shot them.down. If only they knew!!! It infuriates me 😂

Hope everyone else is doing ok. The Facebook group is still going well if anyone wants to join 😊

[Miami81]

Hi. All good at scan. Feeling strange about telling people still. It's really tough. I told people at work on Friday.
So on gender so far we've been told by the consultant that it's a boy and the sonographer on Thursday said girl. So we're a little in the dark still. Oh well. We'll find out at some stage.

[39Suzy]

@miami81 that is good news all is well. Very confusing on the gender front though. Last time i had a gender scan privately at 16w5d and it was very obviously a boy. Likewise at the 20w scan when i was about 19w4d? The most important thing is tgat he or she is healthy 😁

[39Suzy]

All going well with this one 😁 going back for a detailed brain anatomy in a few weeks but everything including feet and heart looking good.
No gender as they were swinging on the umbilical cord like a rope 😂🙈 so will have to wait a bit longer. Hope all you ladies are well? Anyone in 2WW?

[Miami81]

Fantastic news @39Suzy that's really good news.

[Testar0ssa]

Brilliant news @39Suzy :)

[MrsLCW]

Hi lovelies, hope all of you who are expecting are doing well and keeping anxiety down, and those of you TTC are feeling positive and well - sending all the love and luck in the world!
I'm now 22+5 and honestly cannot believe I've gotten to this point!!
Feeling baby move more now which is reassuring. We have an appointment at the fetal medicine unit on Thurs to check baby over in great detail and I'm - for the first time - I'm feeling quietly optimistic!!
Xxx

[39Suzy]

Thanks @testar0ssa how are you doing?

That is brill news @mrslcw hope Thursday goes well 😁

[toots123]

Glad all is going well with pregnancies so far! @miami81 will you get a gender scan?

I was awaiting AF after the D&C and poas on Friday. Very surprised to get a BFP! Got this last night too

[Miami81]

@toots123 that's great. Congratulations. I must join the Facebook group.
Was thinking of joining the kicks count rainbow baby group as well on there. Are any of you on there? How is it if you are?
@toots123 I don't think we will bother with gender scan. We have scans every two weeks from now on so hopefully we get confirmation at some point. But actually it has made me realise that I don't care at all. I thought I did, but the relief of knowing that all was good at the anomaly scan was enough for me.

[Miami81]

@MrsLCW good luck today. I'm around a week behind you. Movements picking up is great but I am also finding that my anxiety has picked up as well. Ordering my kicks count wristband today.

[toots123]

I'm not on it, might have a look though.
Would be fab if you joined our Facebook group. And anyone else! @mrslcw and anyone else who fancies it!

[39Suzy]

Yes, join..... we are all as bonkers as eachother! I love it 😁