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Conception

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Original poster

Anyone else waiting to TTC?

926 replies

happytobemrsg · 09/02/2018 12:53

I thought we could keep each other company while we wait!

Your age/DH age: 29/39
Baby #: This will be #2
When are you TTC: I think we should start in June when DS is 2 but we are so broody it might be sooner
Why are you waiting: We are doing some house renovations at the moment & sorting out some stuff financially. Everything seems a bit up in the air & I can only stress about a couple of things at a time. I'm looking forward to life settling down only to have a newborn mess it all up again Grin
What are you doing to keep busy?: I'm project managing house renovations & enjoying one-on-one time with DS before he (hopefully) becomes a big brother. DH & I are having a huge joint birthday party in September for my 30th & his 40th so I'm enjoying planning that!

OP posts:
RandomUsernameHere · 14/03/2018 19:15

@dottydally that sounds exciting! You're only advised to wait 6 months if both partners travel to the Zika zone. If it is just you traveling, then the advice is to wait 8 weeks x

dottydally · 14/03/2018 19:30

@RandomUsernameHere that's helpful, thank you. It would be just me going - 8 weeks (2 cycles?) doesn't sound as bad. It's an opportunity I don't want to pass up but equally I am desperate for a baby Blush

How long are you waiting for again?

TheOneWithTheBaby · 14/03/2018 19:30

Sorry that was me. Women are advised two months. Men six.

We have decided to take all precautions and then get DH tested. You can pay for it privately. It has to be done a couple of weeks after the trip and tests for anti bodies. It's reliable but obviously not 100%. After the test we will see what we want to do. If there's any possibility he had it we will obviously wait. If the test comes back negative and he didn't have any obvious bites we will consider risks then we've decided.

RandomUsernameHere · 14/03/2018 19:43

We are waiting 6 months (5 left) as we both traveled.
2 months really isn't long, I'm sure it will fly by!

Original poster
happytobemrsg · 16/03/2018 20:49

Welcome to all the newbies 👋🏻

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FrancesV83 · 16/03/2018 21:19

Hello everyone.
I'm 35/OH 40.
I came off cerelle nearly two weeks ago after taking it religiously for over 8 years (no bleed yet!)
Thinking of TTC in August/September time to give my body a chance to get back to normal first.
I have an 8 year old from a previous relationship and my husband has a 20 year old and 19 year old from previous relationship and is also a grandad!
Am I completely mad to be thinking of adding another to our unconventional family?!Smile

dottydally · 17/03/2018 14:00

@FrancesV83 welcome! Absolutely not mad - how does your OH feel about it?

FrancesV83 · 17/03/2018 14:18

@dottydally Funnily enough when we were first together he said he definitely didn't want any more children as he didn't get to see his boys as often as he'd have liked and play an active role in their lives. It's only since his granddaughter was born that he now really wants to be a dad again.
He feels as though he never really got the chance to be a dad to his sons and wants another chance now that we're married and financially stable.

dottydally · 17/03/2018 14:26

@FrancesV83 that's lovely! How old is his granddaughter? How would your 8 year old take to having a brother or sister?

FrancesV83 · 17/03/2018 14:38

@dottydally I know! It's such a u-turn.
His granddaughter is 1, he loves her to bits, it's so lovely to watch. My son absolutely loves her too so I think he'd be fine about a brother or sister. He is the most loving child so I think he'd be great.

dottydally · 17/03/2018 17:52

@FrancesV83 how exciting! Having an age gap means he will be able to be helpful as well Smile

dottydally · 17/03/2018 17:59

I am still struggling with what to do with work. The opportunity to go abroad is a brilliant one, and would either happen this year or next. This year would be a tight squeeze with the other projects I am working on but doable if we could agree the right dates, and wouldn't impact our plans to ttc.

Next year however, I will be ttc or maybe even pregnant and find the zika situation a bit too worrying.

Equally, my Nan is still in a very bad way and this would mean me going away for at least a month (I think that's the minimum period they like you to go for).

I don't really know what I'm hoping for by telling you all of this, but I needed to let it out somewhere. I haven't told any of my friends we want to ttc and for obvious reasons don't feel comfortable discussing it with people at work. My OH is supportive whatever I decide (which is wonderful), but I feel it's a huge decision on my shoulders. Argh! Confused

mussie · 17/03/2018 18:28

Is there any way to pin down exactly when it might happen? If they're leaving it that vague, and they need to know for definite fairly soon, then I suppose you would have to turn it down - you absolutely wouldn't be able to travel there if pregnant! And I guess you wouldn't know if you were going to be pregnant until the month before, which is probably too short notice to cancel?

Saying that, I'm sure they'd have to have a contingency plan for people cancelling these trips, because surely people have family emergencies and whatnot. So you could just accept and then wing it from there

Hofty · 17/03/2018 19:02

@FrancesV8 that is so lovely. It's not mad at all. I'm excited for you.

@dottydally
This is a tricky one for you. What does DP think? Sounds odd but did you have a 'gut' reaction when they told you? What was your first emotion? Were you excited or immediately worried about ttc and future plans? I quite often go by first instincts.

Ps, I heard today that I've got a new job that I've been wanting for ages! WineCakeBrew

dottydally · 17/03/2018 19:14

@mussie we have a call on Tuesday to talk through some finer details, so hopefully all will become clear! I think cancelling because your pregnant is valid - especially given the health risks.

@Hofty my initial reaction was 'oh that sounds great!', but once I started thinking about all the implications I started to feel a bit sick. DP is so good about it all, but equally concerned by the ttc implications. With my Nan, he has very much been 'we can drive up there whenever', but has said that I would need to get comfortable with the risk of something happening whilst I was away.

Huge congratulations on the job!! What's the job doing? ShockI hope you are celebrating Wine

Hofty · 17/03/2018 19:18

@dottydally
That's totally a valid reason to pull out! Once you know more details it'll be easier to decide. Great advice from @mussie there too.

It's a beauty brand that is very famous for its bath bombs. It might not sound amazing to everyone here with your lovely jobs, but since doing a masters in International Relations I've really, really fancied something delightfully superficial Grin Although the brand do social activist campaigns that I'll be part of. Bet you can guess who it is?

Hofty · 17/03/2018 19:19

Also @dottydally, I'm very sorry to hear about your lovely nan Flowers

Original poster
happytobemrsg · 17/03/2018 19:19

Congratulations on the new job @Hofty!

@dottydally it's such a tough one. I think if it were me I'd accept the placement abroad. Unfortunately you never know how long it'll take to get your bfp so I don't think I'd give up on that sort of opportunity. If you did fall pregnant before then like you said it's a valid reason to pull out

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Original poster
happytobemrsg · 17/03/2018 19:20

Haha @Hofty that sounds like an awesome job. I hope you get a discount! I use their lovely shampoo & conditioners

OP posts:
Hofty · 17/03/2018 19:28

Thank you lovely @happytobemrsg Yes quite a big discount, plus a living wage! And a big gift box as a welcome present 😍

@dottydally if it wasn't for your nan, if I was in your shoes I'd take the oppprtunity. Ttc can wait if you want it to, you have the luxury of time. Plus, I know we all want this very much, but babies do of course tie you down. Think of this as your last big work trip before you're a mother, obviously I'm not saying that working mothers can't go on trips, of course they can! But it is a little different/more difficult. The situation with your nanny does make things a little less simple though, your DP is right that it's sensible to be prepared for something to happen while you're away. Why don't you share these concerns with work and find out if there is a way out of the placement quickly in an emergency?

Doodlebug89 · 17/03/2018 20:43

Watching One Born Every Minute and my motivation to delay TTC is wavering. I thought it might put me off Hmm

I will be in my fertile week when we are on holiday in April so would be perfect timing, but I really want to avoid a Christmas baby 👶

Original poster
happytobemrsg · 18/03/2018 06:54

@Doodlebug89 I watched OBEM the other night & it had the opposite effect on me!! I have a good labour with DS but seeing all the things go wrong freaked me out a bit

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Doodlebug89 · 18/03/2018 09:37

@happy that’s the reaction I was hoping for 😂 I must be feeling hormonal. I am past my March fertile week so one month missed, but May seems a long way away!

Original poster
happytobemrsg · 18/03/2018 17:34

@Doodlebug89 I'm passed my March fertile week too & we are waiting til June. Though we are not using contraception (only ever did pull & pray anyway) so there is always a chance it could happen earlier. It's just so tempting to say "oh we're TTC in a couple of months anyway, it'll make different to try a little earlier"

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Getmeamagiclamp · 18/03/2018 21:51

Hello, Can I join you ladies please?
I’m 25, DP is 38. We’re planning on ttc in July as we’re off on holiday in November and so I don’t run any risk of being too big.
It may seem mad not to wait until after the holiday but ttc has been delayed so many times before, this was the compromise. Although I’m still horrendously nervous that another reason will come up for further delays... so tentatively joining you guys I guess.