TTC after pregnancy loss. Thread 16. New Year, new hope for all!

[NoCatsHere]

Hello to anyone TTC after suffering pregnancy loss at any stage. Supportive group for all hoping for their rainbow babies.

I haven't used ovulation sticks this month as I am hoping not stressing about getting pregnant might help but now I'm not sure when I ovulated as I normally do before the apps say and I'm not sure when my af is. I'm trying to wait until 21/2 because then I will be definitely late, also I only have a couple of pregnancy tests left and I don't want to order any more because that is saying that it's not going to happen this month. The other thing is everywhere I turn now there are either babies or pregnant women, even in the tv programs. It feels like even the universe is against me.

@peachesarenom you may have ovulated earlier. But I'd say do it that way to be on the safe side. I usually get 3 high, 2 peak, 1 high then one low. And then my temp spike. But everyone is slightly different. This month after my mmc I got about 9 highs, then I reset and my temp spiked the day after so I stopped testing. But I also don't ic opks along side. This month I had no positive ones except just after my erpc when I was still + on hpt. So who knows. That's why I like bbt. Cos my temp tells me I've ovulated even though the opks don't.
@Martydog fingers crossed for the test. I know the feeling about everyone bloody pregnant!! My best mate is a week over due? My other mate is due in a month and a half, and two other friends have announced recently. And then there's just so many people everyday walking down the street with bumps!! You'll get your turn. Sending hugs

Thank you @cakelaur! Let’s see what the weekend brings 🤞.
@primrose15 keeping my fingers crossed for you! I will test on Mon if no AF - it isn’t due til tomorrow.

Cakelaur my CBAFM is now saying my period is due in 3 days!!! How does it know that based on 5 tests??? I wish I had BBT data!

Oh well, we'll have to wait and see.

I kind of know what you mean Martydog I'm dreading seeing people with big bumps in July when I was due.

Good luck to everyone testing! I can't wait to see lots moe BFPs on here

Well that’s me spotting. I anticipate AF tomorrow. Surprisingly I feel fine about it. But not sure how I will feel when I’m bleeding- my first few AF always got to me after my other 2 mc. Just have to see.
The only thing that’s upsetting me is I don’t particularly want to try in the next few months- it would be just my luck I drop on and I have 2 very close birthdays! Is that silly? Should I just let nature take its course and if I end up with another December baby that’s whats meant to be?

@Cakelaur hope you don’t mind me asking a charting question. I’ve been tracking my bbt since my D&C and it seems to be tracking downward over the past two weeks, I’d thought I’d ovulated but clearly not confirmed by temperature spike! I guess this phase of my chart is my body getting back to normal before a reset I guess. Did your 1st chart post MC look anything like this?

Sorry you ladies are here xx Did any of you get told to wait 3 cycles before getting pregnant ? Had my last mc start of December bled for 8 wks and they kept saying it was normal until I started getting excruciating pain so they scanned me to discover an infection and retained tissue. Had a d and c just under 2 weeks ago x

Nothing wrong with another Dec baby in my book Primrose16!

Disneyrules gosh it sounds like you've had a really hard time! I'm so sorry. I haven't been told to wait. The specialist said to just carry on trying. I was 11 weeks though. Maybe it's something to do with the infection?

@disneyrules I had a early natural miscarriage this time so did not need any medical advice. My previous 2 I was told I was okay as long as I was ready emotionally. Like @peaches said maybe due to the infection. You could ask for a second opinion

I was told to wait until I had stopped bleeding to try again as there is a risk of infection until then. So I wonder if because you had an infection they recommend a bit longer? Call and ask or look at the miscarriage association website.

I POAS today (never been interested in doing these thing early until I started chatting with you guys!) and BFN. I should be 13 DPO so that's me out for this month I think. Frustrating, but never mind.

Starting to worry a bit about the gap between DC. There are just over two years between the first two, but there will now be more than three years between the middle and youngest if we have another. I wonder if we should set a limit on when we should give up.

Looking forward to good news from others on Monday and Wednesday!! I love checking in to see how you are all doing. Good luck!

Cookiefiend there are 8 years between me and my younger sibling. We are very close!

@peachesarenom if you're due in 3 days it's probably based on your previous cycles. But also if Defo be testing. Is it asking you to test for pregnancy yet?

@Primrose16 I cried the other day cos I didn't want he baby to have a December birthday cos it was too close to xmas. And I wanted the August one cos that was perfect timing. But really having lost one, I'll take any baby with any birthday and I'll be grateful for that. So if it were me, id let nature happen.

@dulwichdays you've Defo not ovulated yet. Your temp is still dropping. I ended up ovulating about a week later than usual. And about a week after a negative hpt. Have you tested to confirm it's negative? I've attached my chart to have a look at.

@Cookiefiend don't panic too much. Unless your tracking your ovulation could be a week out. So until af shows up... you're still very much in!

Cookie I wouldn't worry about the age gap my son is 10. What is meant to be will be.

@Cakelaur I tested for the first time on Wednesday and got a negative test, which I guess is a positive sign. The hospital said to test at 3 weeks but I couldn’t wait and tested at 2.

I’m not the most consistent at the time I take bbt. I often wake at 5am and take it then! Figure that’ll be more accurate than if I take at 6am or 7am after only an hours sleep.

Thanks for sharing your chart. Is that your first post MC? X

@dulwichdays yeah defo Worth putting temp in, even if it's a little earlier than usual. I don't notice an hour or so difference. But yesterday I had a massive temp drop. But it was 3hrs early so I marked it as questionable. Back up again today.
In terms of hpt I was testing from as soon as the bleeding stopped after the op.

@Cakelaur thank you! My post D&C temps were much higher than my normal and where the temp now is more my pre-Ovulation norm. Although I only started temping the month I conceived last time so not a huge amount for comparison!!

@dulwichdays I'd give it another week or some. After d&c it prob takes about 6 weeks to get your period back. Hoping ovulation soon. Are you doing opks too?

Thank you for getting back to me ladies @peaches it's been horrendous, I knew I didn't feel right and it was only because I was so persistent that they finally agreed to do a scan and they were horrified that they had let me go on that long. I was 10 weeks. I was so upset and angry. @primrose and @cookie I guess the infection has something to do with it. 3 months seems an eternity lol reading this thread has really helped me through everything to be honest x

@cakelaur yep I hated the idea of having a December baby and I suggested not to ‘try’ that month- little did I know I was already pregnant. My first loss and most recent would have been late Aug/early sept (I would love a summer baby). My 2nd loss was a Feb due date.

Disneyrules I really think you should get another opinion. 3 months does seem ages. I had to beg and scream in a&e reception when I was having contractions, for painkillers. The most dehumanising experience of my life.

@Cakelaur No I’m not doing OPK’s - want to try and leave it a few months more before going down that route. My cycle was pretty regular before and I was pretty sure when I ovulated. I think it’d leave me to even more OTT than I currently feel!

I know it's defo too early cos I'm only 4dpo but I've got really dry hands and hip pains. Just like when I was pregnant. Dunno if it's just my body adjusting from the mmc.

Hey girls,

@disneydays: I’m sorry for your loss x

I’d presume that’s regarding the infection. I’m with the fertility clinic and I’ve got a follow up appointment in March (I had a miscarriage last week). They’ve said to let my body recover and they’ll assess in March as I’m not likely to ovulate/have a period before then.

From what I’ve read, it’s processing it emotionally that will be the time taker.

I’ve spent the afternoon having some “me” time with my daughter and just processing everything. I’ve written little “Charlie” a letter that I’ll put with his scans and one thing that I wanted to share from it: “if love was enough and all that was needed, then you’d still be alive and growing as you were loved So much”.

It’s helped me process the things that I wanted to say but have struggled to say out loud.

@hortonlovesahoo I'm sorry for your loss too, I'm here if you need to talk. I'll be honest, I don't think it has sunk in yet. I experienced 2 within the space of 4 months having been trying for 18 months. Your letter is very touching and the words I can 100 percent relate to. @peaches you're experience at a and e sounds truly awful. I wish people would cut us a bit of slack that we know our own bodies x

@Hortonlovesahoo That's a beautiful line. It'll come across as odd to say this (and I'm sorry if it causes upset), but he's so lucky.

All of our babies are so lucky to have mothers who care about them all so, so much.

@Disneyrules I had two ERPC ew in the space of 5 months and I think even now I'm just still so stumped about it all. It's a lot to get your head around. One day at a time!