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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Where there’s a Yam, there’s a way

995 replies

Bubblegum89 · 08/01/2018 21:55

Thread numero four-o.

A safe place for those of you who have been trying to conceive for 6+ months and even yams aren’t helping. Come and have a good ol’ bitch and a moan without judgement.

The Yam Commandments are as follows;

  • Thou shall not arrive one day and post BFP next day
  • Thou shall not give advice to others when TTC for one month only
  • Thou shall not participate in one-up-manship and realise TTC is shit for everyone in different ways
  • Thou shall allow posters to be fucked off with the world and everything in it at regular points in the month
  • Thou shall not be offended by strong language
  • Thou shall not tell everyone to eat yams
  • Thou shall accept being called a muppet for testing at 7dpo at 9pm at night

And most importantly...

  • Thou shall not symptom spot during the two week wait and must be prepared for a telling off if they do so.

Welcome and welcome. We’re all very nice and friendly despite being horrible bitter old cows ☺️

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Thread gallery
12
Pibbee · 14/01/2018 21:27

Oh and as for checking cervix? I have literally no clue how to do that. I don’t think I have ever been able to find mine! And I don’t understand all this tip of nose feeling vs. Lips feeling... I’m sure my lips feel pretty similar to the tip of my nose! So confusing...

LookingAtTheStars89 · 14/01/2018 22:00

Do you think I should be concerned that last month and this month, a week before flo is due, I have felt poorly? I have a sore throat, headache, I feel just like you would before you come down with something. Also, at the beginning of the week, I had a canker sore (little white/red dot in mouth) Do you think it's something to do with my immune system?

Original poster
Bubblegum89 · 14/01/2018 22:07

LookingattheStars I always feel rough a week or so before af. I feel groggy and tired and sniffly and run down. I get quite bad migraines too. I think it’s a hormonal thing?

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SoozC · 14/01/2018 22:26

Well, no sign of af but had abdominal discomfort most of the day. I'd say it's not af cramps, feels different. I can't explain it really, like pressure but sometimes sharp, more noticeable at times than others and I haven't had to take any painkillers. But, of course, af will turn up tomorrow. After a bfn on a frer at estimated 14dpo, I can't believe anything else will happen.

Sorry I'm being so introverted in my comments lately. I promise I do read what's happening with you all and will make more of an effort as soon as next cycle starts and I'm out of my current funk. xx

LookingAtTheStars89 · 14/01/2018 22:32

@Bubblegum89. Mmm. Maybe you're right. I've decided I'm going to change my diet up a bit. I've been eating way too much sugar. I also think I need to 're think my vitamins. Im only taking folic acid at the minute.

LookingAtTheStars89 · 14/01/2018 22:33

@SoozC. Flowers

QuietTime · 14/01/2018 23:52

Aaand spotting and cramps have started. Fuck it. I hate this.

No need to apologise, sooz really hope it's not AF for you

stars89 I'm another one - often feel like I'm coming down with a cold or something in the week before AF, but have done for years

MrsMac1489 · 15/01/2018 07:30

Off to the hospital at this ungodly hour for repeat MC bloods. Last time I called for results they told me I was "still pregnant". My useless Uterus and I beg to differ.

Sorry to hear about AF returning guys. She's such a bitch xxx

Milknosugar1 · 15/01/2018 07:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cariad2017 · 15/01/2018 07:52

Just wondering whether there’s room for another one aboard?

9dpo on Cycle 16 and having started the month with misplaced hope and confidence, I’m fairly sure AF is due to make yet another uninvited descent before the week is out. Feeling very very glum about it all.

Stats are as follows:

Age: 35
Ttc #2 (DS is 2. Ttc 1 was also pretty shit, albeit not quite as drawn out. It took 11 months, including a cp and a ruptured ectopic (which means I’m now a Fallopian tube down) along the way). This time it’s been 14 months without a hint of a BFP. We’ve had the standard fertility tests and discovered that DH has poor morphology (although his motility and count are good) so in theory, although the odds are against us conceiving quickly, it definitely shouldn’t be impossible. The Dr at the Fertility clinic thought we’d manage it ourselves but as the months wear on, I’m feeling less and less optimistic.

DH has been on a cocktail of vitamins and (apart from a 2 week “break” over Christmas), limiting alcohol and caffeine since mid- October in the hope it makes a difference...

Thinking of getting the ball rolling on IVF in the Spring if we haven’t had any luck, although to be honest, I really don’t want it to come to that... It’s such a huge amount of money to spend on something that has no guarantee of working, not to mention the huge emotional toll it no doubt takes. Xxx

Original poster
Bubblegum89 · 15/01/2018 09:21

Sooz don’t apologise :) it’s so hard when you want it so badly and things keep happening to get your hopes up. It’s like your body knows. Lots of people don’t get a bfp until after their period is late so you never know.

Welcome Cariad sorry to see you here. Hopefully you won’t be with us long (in the nicest possible way lol)

Got my follow up at the fertility clinic tomorrow. Is it weird to say I want them to tell me that they’ve found something? I want them to tell me there’s something wrong. I just don’t think I could cope being told it was just unexplained fertility. To me, that’s basically saying, there’s no reason why you can’t get pregnant except you just can’t get pregnant. At least if there’s an issue, there’s still options like medication or surgery etc to get rid of/improve it and give me a better chance. I can’t get my head around unexplained fertility as it is. How do you have nothing wrong but still can’t gwt pregnant? It baffles me. At this point, i would even be okay with scar tissue as I know that having it removed usually helps even if it can keep growing back. I’m just so fed up of being in limbo now :(

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Pibbee · 15/01/2018 10:04

I often get slightly run-down before AF too. Along with occasional bleeding gums (just why?!), it’s just such a delightful time...Hmm

@Bubblegum I know exactly what you mean re almost wanting something to be wrong. Cos at least you then know what the issue is, and it can most likely be treated. I have a hideous feeling I am in the “unexplained” camp. I have my first appt at the end of Jan. all test of mine have been fine so far. I remember being almost a bit gutted that my day 3 and day 21 tears came back normal as I’d decided I wouldn’t be too bothered about a hormone imbalance as that could be easily fixed. “unexplained” less so.... I hope your appt goes well tomorrow and you get some answers

Pibbee · 15/01/2018 10:07

Tears?? Tests... Hmm

MynameisJune · 15/01/2018 10:08

@bubblegum I think I would feel exactly the same as you. When we had our initial tests I was hoping it was something quite simple like me not ovulating because that’s fairly easy to help/solve. The unexplained infertility has to be the worst diagnosis in terms of TTC, but even then there are options. Unfortunately they just seem to be very expensive.

We’ve been talking about adoption if nothing happens naturally. I’m not sure that I could handle the IVF rollercoaster and whilst we’d obviously love another baby I don’t have a huge urge for another biologically. And there is part of me that thinks giving another baby a chance at a better life is maybe better than bringing another human into an already overpopulated race. But that’s probably for another thread 😂

Original poster
Bubblegum89 · 15/01/2018 10:15

I know, it sounds crazy but I was disappointed when they told me my blood tests were fine. When I last went to the FC, and they did the 3D US and said it seemed to be normal and the nurse said “sometimes fertility can just be unexplained” my heart just sank. I want to have something wrong that can be fixed, not just not be able to get pregnant for no reason.

I don’t think I would adopt. I want a baby with my OH and if I can’t I would either consider surrogacy or nothing at all. Adoption is amazing, my auntie and uncle adopted two kids (a brother and sister) about 5 years ago and it’s like they’ve always been here and my auntie and uncle love them like they were biologically their own. I just don’t think I could do it :(

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Rubberduckies · 15/01/2018 10:28

Sorry for everyone having a rough time. We're just heading into our 9th fertile week, now with Dh wearing boxers and us both taking various supplements.

To those saying about feeling a bit rubbish with a colds and mouth ulcers before AF, I'm sure I read somewhere about having a lowered immune system around implantation time because body is working so hard at this point.....might have made that up though!

Pibbee · 15/01/2018 10:34

I’m the same @Bubblegum, DH and I are both in agreement that adoption is not for us. Which is odd, as I always used to say I would prefer to adopt rather than have my own!

I’m not sure I could hack IVF either. I have two friends currently going through it and it just sounds so regimented and invasive, and with no guarantees whatsoever. Dunno.

MynameisJune · 15/01/2018 10:41

@bubblegum before I had DD I couldn’t contemplate adoption. I very much wanted a baby that was biologically ours. But now I’m okay with not doing it again, maybe because of the horrendous labour....

LookingAtTheStars89 · 15/01/2018 10:43

@Rubberduckies. I read that a bit ago lol

LookingAtTheStars89 · 15/01/2018 11:03

@Bubblegum89. Have you thought about IUI? That's a heck of a lot cheaper than IVF

RhiBee29 · 15/01/2018 11:27

Huge baby bomb just dropped at work, so pleased for my colleague but so frustrated with my own rubbish incompetent reproductive system!

WonkyDonk87 · 15/01/2018 11:52

Ahhh gutting @RhiBee29 - I've got a colleague who is 22 months pg and it takes a lot of internal arse kicking some days

Rubberduckies · 15/01/2018 11:56

I hear you @RhiBee29 deep down you're happy, and know that them being pregnant doesn't affect you getting pregnant. But it's still bloody hard, it's feels so unfair - why them and not us!?

I'm finding it hardest when people have got pregnant quickly with no fuss, no opks, temperatures or semen analysis. Come off contraception and BAM! Pregnant.

Rubberduckies · 15/01/2018 11:57

@WonkyDonk87 22months pregnant!? Is your friend an elephant? Alien? Whale?

Original poster
Bubblegum89 · 15/01/2018 11:58

I haven’t really looked into IUI to be honest. IVF does sounds just awful and the success rate is around 30% which just seems terrible odds for the things you have to go through. It’s why I’m hoping that something is wrong with me lol so I can just go on medication or something to sort it out and not have to go down that path. I think as well, because I have a daughter already, adoption wouldn’t really make any sense as an option for us. OH is already a dad to a non-biological child so the whole point of ttc for us is so he can have a biological child. To adopt would just be giving him something he already has, if that makes sense.

RE unexplained infertility, how common is that if you’ve been able to get pregnant in the past? I’ve been pregnant twice with no issue. Makes me think maybe there IS something wrong. I wish my appointment was today haha

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