Where there’s a Yam, there’s a way

[Bubblegum89]

Thread numero four-o.

A safe place for those of you who have been trying to conceive for 6+ months and even yams aren’t helping. Come and have a good ol’ bitch and a moan without judgement.

The Yam Commandments are as follows;

• Thou shall not arrive one day and post BFP next day

• Thou shall not give advice to others when TTC for one month only

• Thou shall not participate in one-up-manship and realise TTC is shit for everyone in different ways

• Thou shall allow posters to be fucked off with the world and everything in it at regular points in the month

• Thou shall not be offended by strong language

• Thou shall not tell everyone to eat yams

• Thou shall accept being called a muppet for testing at 7dpo at 9pm at night

And most importantly...

• Thou shall not symptom spot during the two week wait and must be prepared for a telling off if they do so.

Welcome and welcome. We’re all very nice and friendly despite being horrible bitter old cows ☺️

Defo take all your test results @pibbee but don’t be surprised if they send you for more! Waiting times vary but we’re about 8-12 weeks from initial consult to follow up. And that was delayed due to xmas and new year. 🤞 it’s straightforward for you

Hello all,
Hope you don't mind if I join?
Currently on day 3 on cycle 7 (or 8 can't remember!), why is AF so much more painful since TTC - its as if she is punishing me for trying to send her away for 9 months!
I am trying for #1 and am 32. My cycle is regular and I most certainly do not symptom spot during 2WW.

Well this is shit. Yesterday I had horrible cramps and dark red bleeding (medium flow) There was more than usual, not much but a tiny bit more so thought maybe my period was starting to get better finally. I’ve has the tiniest drop of brown watery bleeding today, I’m talking literally a drop. And now nothing. When I go for a wee, there’s nothing when I wipe. I’m so annoyed, I just want my period to be normal :(

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/sponsored_qas/3146651-Got-any-questions-about-fertility-Ask-CARE-Fertility-s-experts-Chance-to-win-150-voucher

For anyone who wants to ask any questions, this thread is happening. Presumably WHY THE FUCK AM I NOT PREGNANT? is not specific enough so I’m not sure what to ask.

I asked a specific question but I doubt it'll get picked because I'm sure the answer would be "Who knows?"

I am looking into counselling. I'm finding my whole situation so, so hard, it's eating away at me. Emotionally and mentally I don't think I'm coping well with my mc.

I was walking down the stairs at work earlier today and just had a moment of clarity that I'm probably never going to have a baby myself. Perhaps we need to start looking into adoption again, as we started in October before my bfp. I think I prefer it to IVF, as weird as that may sound.

If I was even 3 or 4 years younger I'd take a break from ttc to recharge, but my age and DH's put a horrible pressure on it all. I thought years of being bullied, loneliness and depression were bad but the emotion I feel now every day is a billion times worse.

Oh @sooz talking to someone professional might really help you, If you want to then go for it. It might help you figure out how to move forward. It’s ok to seek some support. Sending you a big hug 🌺

@sooz I think talking to someone professionally sounds like a good idea. I saw on the other thread that you’re 36, I know that’s older in terms of TTC but I think you could still take a cycle or two off without it harming your chances. Or maybe try and book a holiday over FW soon so you can still dtd but in a nice warm location!

I’m not one to talk but I think maybe you would benefit from speaking to someone sooz Obviously it probably won’t come to it but adoption is a lovely thing to do. I couldn’t do it myself but I admire people who do. And I totally understand why you’d prefer it to IVF. All those hormone injections and side effects and all that money just for a 30% chance. It’s definitely not for everyone. Sending lots of hugs your way ❤️

I’m so pissed off with this period, I can’t even begin to explain. A one day period. I can’t get pregnant and I can’t even have a proper period, what the hell is the point of even having a uterus?! I’ve been for a wee three times since I took my mooncup out and put it away this afternoon as I didn’t need it and each time I did the toilet roll check and nothing. I’ve honestly had enough of this now, it’s ridiculous

Sending lots of hugs @SoozC I hope you find some support. I found the Miscarriage Associations website very good and they have links to support groups and other help. I had a cry yesterday about it and I'm 6mths down the line. Look after yourself, 2018 is the year of self-care according to my magazine xx

I've not been holding my wee or reducing my fluid intake for opks.... I've been using super sensitive ones so don't know if that's the difference. Maybe if anyone's struggling it might be worth trying a more sensitive test? They're just internet cheapies I found on amazon. This is the first cycle I've not had a really massively obvious positive opk, and I think that's my fault for messing about with Agnus and b complex and millions of other vitamins etc!!

In other news my mix of vitamins have not yet stopped my stupid spotting during luteal phase...spotted Dpo 2, 4 and 5 so far.... any ideas?

Seems like a rough week for many :( sorry. It sucks to have particularly crappy days on top of all the regular crappy days.

I need realists to talk sense to me. I'm cd27, usually about 24-26 say cycles, but with the occasional 27-29 thrown in for good measure... I've written this cycle off from the start really. Been in a funk since my last period about it all. Didn't even really work out when to dtd this cycle, have been uninterested in symptom spotting, not noticed anything anyway, BUT I've had no stopping, which I always get by now :( so my body is messing with my head when I'm trying to just take a month of not even really bothering with it.

I'm not pregnant. I know I won't be, I'll just be having a longer cycle and will bleed in two days time or something. Please reaffirm this for me, so I can stamp out the tiny "but maybe" that's in my head. I don't want that in my head this month. I'm over it this month. Maybe next month I'll just have no sex at all, then I won't be left wondering :(

*no spotting, no no stopping!

@newsense not going to help because there is always a maybe in every cycle. You’re dtd around the right time, at some point you will likely get pregnant. I’d test as then you’ll know either way.

I woke up this morning feeling completely miserable. I am having the longest cycle so far, 39 days and negative tests. Wtf is my period?? I'm considering going to the doctors because every bfn or missed flo is making me more and more miserable. I could cope if flo would turn up. I know I should be still dtd but I just don't want to.

Oh god I feel like a right bitch. Just been baby-bombed by a friend, and I am pleased for her but I’m also gutted at my total inability to do this. She’s due in September so must have only just got pg, but she had a scan yesterday which makes no sense!!

I am also having a bad day with yet another baby announcement at my work. So sad it doesn't work for me

It’s shite isn’t it everyone else is having babies and all I’m doing is trotting off to the fertility clinic wails

Sorry for baby-bombs and elusive AFs all round
@NewSense It's impossible to get rid of the what-ifs, distraction is the only thing that helps me - keep busy!
@LookingAtTheStars89 I'm on cd55 today....  Totally get the frustration- have bit the bullet and made a gp appointment.
@Pibbee and @catherine1988 - don't make yourself feel worse for feeling negative - come here and rant where you know you won't be judged!

I just feel like such a bitch that I am so sad about other people’s baby news! Why am I making it about me ffs! I messaged DH about my friend and all he can say back is “be patient”... I have been (im)patient for over a year now!! I am now ignoring his messages. Cos that’s not childish of me AT all...

So glad for this thread and the fact that you all get what I mean

Cd 55 @wonky? I hope the docs can give you some answers....

@WonkyDonk87. And I'm moaning about cd39! I really thought I was pregnant this time but I'm actually starting to worry that I'm not ovulating. I've had a bit of a struggle with opks and with my cycles getting longer and longer it's looking more likely. I don't feel physically to great either which is a bit worrying. I hope you get some answers soon x

Me too.... I've been reading the "taking charge of your fertility" book and was all geared up ready to start temping/charting when AF arrived.... still no bloody sign (no pun intended )
I can only assume atm that I'm not ovulating at all, or at best erratically and def not effectively.
We've started having conversations about fostering instead, and although DH says he wouldn't consider it for a few years so we can say we tried what we could, he's otherwise pretty on board and I'm quite passionate (for want of a less wanky word) about it so there's that at least...

Other people's babies just remind me of what I don't have. l I waited for my husband to be ready to have a baby, I finally get to try, it doesn't work, I go to gp, they mess up my bloods which all have to be repeated, I have a hycosy, I get a infection and bleeding for a month, I get my gyn appointment for referral to fertility services, it get cancelled and moved to 5 weeks later, I am 19 months in and I went to the GP in month 11. There is nothing wrong with me Im in my 20s have regular cycles, I ovulate, my lady bits are as they should be, my husband has good sperm. I mean WTF. Sorry everyone rant complete... moan moan moan

@WonkyDonk87. I was going to book a fertility scan for next weekend in case flo arrived this weekend just got, so they could maybe predict ov for me but it seems pointless now! I may still book it so they can have a look what's going on in there.