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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

40+ ttc: 2018 full of bfp's!

999 replies

Orchid222 · 07/01/2018 22:03

Ladies, the old thread has now closed so I created a new one but can't post the link, hopefully you'll find it and we can continue.

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Original poster
Orchid222 · 08/02/2018 20:59

Great, good luck, let's hope this will do it.

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Pinkcar123 · 09/02/2018 07:00

Hi please can i join? Soon to be 40 and ttc #2. Need some positivity 😀

Cleozeta · 09/02/2018 09:39

Orchid are you going to be doing fertility clinic alongside chinese herbs? I might do both. And acupuncture if I can afford it. If I'm not giving up I might as well go all out.

Sparkly - I asked the GP if there was anything I could do to up chances or lower FSH, but he said only a good diet and exersize. Usual stuff. So I took it to Dr Google.

Welcome Pinkcar

sparklyglitterball · 09/02/2018 12:31

Makes sense to go all out cleo! I guess NHS Drs can't/won't recommend alternative medicine as it's not gone through all of the conventional testing etc. But sounds like the statistics speak for themselves. Welcome pink car.

Pinkcar123 · 09/02/2018 12:36

Hi everyone

JoJoyorker · 09/02/2018 13:05

You might as well do all you can Cleo. It's expensive when you put it altogether but you don't want to regret giving it your all.
Welcome pinkcar, how old is your DC and how long have you been trying for nB. 2?

Pinkcar123 · 09/02/2018 13:32

My lo is 4 and we have been trying for 2 years 😑 one round of ivf, a mmc and now another mc later...here we are 😥

Original poster
Orchid222 · 09/02/2018 17:45

Cleo-yes I'll be doing both. I've been doing acupuncture for nearly 4 months but no results so far. :(
Sparkly-I actually read about Chinese herbs when Cleo said her FSH was high. I googled high FSH and found messages from people who claimed Chinese herbs have helped them lower it and get pregnant.
Welcome Pinkcar and sorry about your losses. Could I ask your thoughts on ivf? I might end up there in not too distant future and wondering if it's what I imagine it to be.

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Pinkcar123 · 09/02/2018 18:27

Hi orchid i found it pretty straightforward tbh. All went well but my pregnancy ended in a anembryonic pregnancy. I have some embryos frozen that i am hoping to try again with. Id do it again no problem (if i had the funds)

Original poster
Orchid222 · 09/02/2018 18:42

Can I ask how much it is? I've read online it's about £5k but not sure if that's total cost including scans, meds etc

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Pinkcar123 · 09/02/2018 19:06

I think in the UK for me it was about 6-7k. I had mine done abroad and with travel and accomodation it was probably about 4k but it did mean 2 weeks off work

JoJoyorker · 09/02/2018 19:28

Cleo did you have your AMH tested? I've been reading today and it seems that is more important than fsh. If you have good AMH but bad fsh it's better than the other way round...I think. I've not had mine back yet.

Cleozeta · 09/02/2018 20:00

They don't offer AMH test on the NHS, I would have to go private for that - which I may do. I have also read that it is more important than FSH too. Hope your results are good Jojo

Original poster
Orchid222 · 09/02/2018 21:09

Cleo-I had AMH done on NHS

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JoJoyorker · 09/02/2018 21:14

Yes my AMH is on the NHS too. They said they didn't do it very often so it goes off somewhere else to be tested and takes a while to come back.

Original poster
Orchid222 · 09/02/2018 21:15

Also have you been to the Chinese place yet? I moved my appt to tomorrow morning but tonight I called a place that's around the corner from our old house and I know is good. The guy on the phone said no herbs will get me pregnant that they also havevherbs but they're to help you relax and get your hormones in balance and it's all about your energy and sleep and offered a free consultation. And my husband thinks I'm a bit nuts willing to pay that much for a consultation to get some herbs. I still haven't told him how much these herbs are...So m on two minds, I either give it a go for a few weeks or I cancel tomorrow morning and go to the other place.

OP posts:
Cleozeta · 09/02/2018 21:46

Maybe take the free consultation? Although free consultations are normally in echange for large treatment fee's! To be honest though it's all worth a try.
I have not been to Chinese place yet, going to go after half term. Quite keen to do anything to lower FSH and balance hormones.
As for AMH on NHS, I was not offered it but was told fertility things on NHS are very limited in our area now. Postcode lottery

Karigan1 · 10/02/2018 10:15

Hey ladies if I got the LH peak on the 26.1.18 AF should be due by today shouldn’t it?. Pretty sure I’m not pregnant as had a couple of traces after dtd and wiping but AF hasn’t yet made a show and wondering if I got my dates wrong?

BooseysMom · 10/02/2018 13:08

Hi, i posted this yesterday and was advised to post on a 40+ thread ..hope you don't mind me butting in but am close to despair. . i'll try to keep this as brief as i can.. Basically we've been sort of ttc DC no.2 for 2-3 years. I'm 46 next week and this time i thought i had struck lucky but that horrid bitch AF appeared with a vengeance yesterday!.. I was at work and just sat on the loo and sobbed 😭 Every month goes by and i feel like my cycles are wasted and as i plunge closer to menopause we have to come to terms with the fact that our DS will be an only. He's not bothered about having a sibling but he's just 4 and doesn't understand. I blame myself entirely as there were times we could have ttc much more frequently than we have..always there's an excuse but then when AF comes round yet again i feel totally desperate so i must want it deep down. But the older i get the more risks there are and having had 2 mc's before DS really scares me as i was 41 then so 46 is crazy to try again! When i confided in my sis-in-law i was told i was completely crazy to want another at my age. She hasn't had any and she's the same age as me. She said she knows of no babies who were born healthy to a woman my age! My mum passed away 1 and half years ago and i haven't got anyone to talk to any more and when i try and confide in family this is what i get! So please ...is there anyone out there who can give me some words of comfort as i can't stand this feeling any more 😥 thank you x

BooseysMom · 10/02/2018 13:18

Oops sorry that wasn't so brief was it?! Confused

Karigan1 · 10/02/2018 13:20

Of course there are healthy babies born to ladies of 46. The risks are only doubled from a low percentage so when compared to 100% it’s still pretty low. If you want a baby you have every chance of having a healthy baby and it’s your choice.

BooseysMom · 10/02/2018 14:44

Thanks Karigan1 for the reassurance. I bet i'm the oldest over 40 on here! Part (the sensible part) of me says stick to one but it's such a hard door to close. Ironing all DS's baby clothes to sell is so much harder than i thought it would be. Is it society or nature or both that say you can't just have one child? I feel that my body is screaming out every month to ttc with strong ovulation symptoms but something stops me ttc too hard!.. Like with DS. Then when AF arrives i plunge into despair all over again!

Clara101 · 10/02/2018 18:04

Hi Booseys, I’m just a few months behind you at 45 and a bit. Very much understand how you feel, you’re not crazy, it’s goid to let it all out and talk about it, tho ideally to someone more understanding than your SIL..! I’m v lucky to have two dcs but continue trying because I always wanted a third. I figure that chances are low but healthy pregnancies do exist at our age so why not try. I feel better that way than if we stopped trying. Wd you consider another route eg adoption? Does yr child have any cousins of similar age? Big hugs to you.

Does yr DP understand yr distress and what are his thoughts? Last summer I became much more vocal w my DP abt how devastated I felt thinking it wdnt happen (tho I know I’m so lucky to have two). Really sharing the extent of my feelings w him did help.

Sending you big hugs!!!

Good luck to those exploring acupuncture etc

BooseysMom · 10/02/2018 22:27

Hi Clara, thank you for your lovely msg. Its good to be able to be open up here and yes you're right, i won't talk to my s-in-l ever again about it .. I never thought she'd be that insensitive. I'm lucky that i can talk to DH. He feels the same way about it. One day we feel one is enough and any more would finish us off! then the next we're panicking that DS will be an only! He does have cousins but they're older and we don't see them much. We've just moved and he has made friends with the kids next door who are closer to his age who he constantly wants to play with, but when i say how would he like a little brother or sister to play with it's always a big fat NO!! We wouldn't adopt. ..we haven't got enough room for them to have a bedroom each. It makes sense to stick with DS and be happy watching him grow but it's the what if's that continue to haunt us. So, are you ttc now?
Do you use the opk's? Or leave it to fate? That's what we do which is why we're so much older as we didn't really try very hard!
Thanks for the hugs Smile .. Good luck x

LuckyHappyMummy123 · 11/02/2018 00:47

BOOSEY. I’m 48 and still holding out and hoping. I don’t post regularly but am always lurking but I just wanted to offer some encouragement. I can’t really talk to anyone in rl either sadly. However if you google Dr Louise Dillner from The Daily Mail you’ll see her blog. She’s a doctor who fell pregnant at 48 also Liz Earle had a baby at 48 so yes it does happen. Wishing you much luck and sending a big hug to you and two fingers to your horrible insensitive sister in law!! xxx

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