TTC after pregnancy loss - thread 15 - Christmas miracles

[TheGrumpySquirrel]

New thread!

@Voxnihili, congratulations! I understand your fear, though, I think it's natural. Wishing you the very best happy and healthy 8 months x

@TheGrumpySquirrel I think that'd be my strategy. Pretend nothing is different than I can't get hurt as much. We'll see how that works out

@voxnihili please don't apologise for posting on here! We are all in this together. That was me 3 weeks ago - mark, or go to Boots to get an FRER! Like you, I chose the latter!

It's natural to be scared. I haven't slept through the night since finding out. I have downloaded no apps, am not a member of any websites to do with pregnancy, and I'm not on any pregnancy threads on here either. I am just too anxious to do any of those, particularly knowing I might lose this one too. Miscarriage sucks the joy right out of pregnancy.

Congrats vox!
We love a bfp on here, it’s nice to hear to good news for a change :)

This is my first time this year heading towards a fertile time and not planning dtd. It’s nice in someways not to have the stress of it all....

Thanks for the welcome ladies.

Sooz did you have to have a scan after yours to check everything was okay. I literally have no idea because this was my first ever BFP. I have only had bleeding for a few days and it seems to be finishing now but then I was only 4 weeks 4 days at the most I think. Ordered loads of cheapie ovulation tests even though I also have the expensive CBFM! Some how it seem to help by ordering them, I need to feel I'm doing something!

I have a GP appointment this week so I can discuss with the GP but useful to hear from others.

Vox that's great to hear hope all goes well for you!

Hi @Hopefulbunny. I had a scan on the second day of bleeding when we saw the sac but no fetal pole. I had another scan a week later, when we couldn't see any sac at all and they confirmed miscarriage. By that point I hadn't bled for 5 days and haven't since. My bleed lasted 4 days.

I ordered a pack of 50 opks too! I know what you mean about needing to do something. Started doing them last week when I was due ov if my mc had been a normal af and have done them two or three times a day since then. I caught a LH surge on Friday but I'm still doing them until my bbt confirms ov.

This was my first pregnancy and bfp too, so I know what you mean about not knowing what to expect. My doc has been great, though. I've had two weeks off as I was totally distraught and couldn't bear going back to my class of chirpy 4-year-olds. I'm back on Tuesday and feel much stronger now.

Hi everyone, can I join this group? I had a miscarriage in August (first pregnancy) and feeling really gutted. Hoping for some good news at Christmas! I've really struggled the last few months to get over it. I went back to work 2 days after my D&C op (miscarriage didnt pass well naturally), but now thinking i maybe went back too soon as I'm still so sad about what happened....and fed up with getting periods rather than positive pregnancy tests! Good luck everyone and here's to lots of rainbow babies in 2018 xxx

Hi to all the newcomers. So sorry you find yourselves here. Xx

Bittersweet day today - aside from feeling very down and un-Christmassy, I finally had a BFN today. I know it's a good thing (especially as I'm going to ttc straight away despite my very small and rather scary Chinese acupuncturist lady telling me I must wait until the new year to ensure full recovery), but it still sucks. But I did get my Christmas tree up and decorated so that's good. X

Quick question. After I have the D&C I was thinking of going to the Drs (Idk what I'm expecting there tbh). I know they might try and investigate if I have another mc (And fuck I'm fully aware and anxious that if the next one doesn't make it it's go time). Is there anything they can do when I see them? Anything I should ask?

They basically said that the 1st was 2nd luck and there's no reason for it to happen another time. That's fine, I accept/accepted that. Not a problem (other than being emotionally battered). Now we're in our current position, where do we go from here? I understand that a 2nd might be just more bad luck and a third try might be fine, but I'm naturally far more wary this time.

@voxnihili congratulations! That’s such good news.

Welcome to the group ladies, sorry you find yourselves here but this is a really positive group x

@UnicornsandRainbows1 my lovely GP told me that the NHS see two miscarriages in a row as 'bad luck', especially if you're under 35. She said they will very occasionally test with two MCs in a row if a woman is of 'advanced maternal age' (I hate all the terms they use!). She said that she wishes that the 3 consecutive MCs 'rule' wasn't the case, as it's so difficult for women, but that it's been that way for a long time. If I lose this one, I'm going to ask to have my progesterone levels checked. I will also ask if it's worth having private testing done.

Welcome newcomers, sorry yous are here though!
Congrats @voxnihili ..lovely news!

@UnicornsandRainbows1 i went private after 2nd one there & they wont do anything until have had 3 😪, so frigging disheartening!! Hopefully you might have more luck!

@di626 Oh that's really crappy, especially as you went private (unless I'm missing something)

@Flatwhite32 Eurgh. Advanced material age makes me what to punch someone in the face, what a stupid, undignified phrase. I really hope it's just bad luck, sadly I shouldn't have to lose another for them to take it seriously. You just get so attatched and they're not just some 'product', they're our babies and I think the system just doesn't see it like that. I get that it's from a medical point of view, but no one deserves to go through it once, let alone a number of times. I have everything crossed for you

@Flatwhite32 The term I heard was "geriatric mother". I'm not quite there yet though. I read that Tommy's was campaigning for investigations after a 2nd miscarriage and eventually for every one to be investigated. I can't see it happening though which is really sad.

Three days late for AF, and more BFNs than I care to mention.

Miscarried just over four weeks ago. Ovulated 16 days ago according to CB, so AF should be here by now - shouldn’t it?

I have never been late unless pregnant.

So confused.

The torturing myself has started. I’ve barely slept. Just taken a test with FMU and it’s no darker than with diluted urine yesterday. I’m convinced my boobs don’t hurt as much. Feel crap as yesterday I allowed myself to think this could be it, there was almost a glimmer of excitement. This morning I feel like I’m back down to earth with a bump (or not as the case will likely be).

Vox try not to test more often than every other day. We'll be here to help x

@PineapplePrincess cb detects Lh surge, you may have ovulated later (do you temp to confirm?). I once had a week of positive OPKs which was so annoying. Cycle can be a bit weird post miscarriage. Obviously hope it's a BFP for you though!

Can I join? I'm trying for #1 and had early losses in september and november at 5 and 6 weeks.

I ovulated a few days ago, so I'm just playing the waiting game. I feel like a BFP is inevitable, but so is the loss after it.

Hi all, wondered if I could join. I MC on 25th Nov at 11 weeks, finding it really hard but hoping it gets easier, usually really into Christmas but not this year! Xxx

@Zoo33 'geriatric mother' is awful! Deary me! No I can't see tests happening after two consecutive MCs either. The NHS seems very set in its ways in that respect.

@PineapplePrincess Unfortunately MC can make your cycles a bit irregular. Mine were all over the place to begin with, and I had spotting between periods which I'd never had before.

@voxnihili I know it's so hard, but try to test every 48 hours. I did my FRERs 48 hours apart. Also, internet cheapies are notorious for their variation. Some women don't get BFPs on them in ages. Mine took ages to go darker compared to other tests.

Welcome @HoldTightPretendItsAPlan And @LFC1952. I'm so sorry for your losses. You'll find lots of support here. There's also a secret Facebook group of you want to join (only if you want to though). @LFC1952 I know what you mean about Christmas. I'm pregnant again, but it's a fairly high possibility I'll lose it, so I'm really not feeling Christmas either.

Thank you @Flatwhite32 it's great to read everyone's posts as it provides comfort even though it's such a horrible thing we've all been through. Like many of us I'm sure, I'm just waiting for my next cycle to try again but the fear of this happening again and whether we can actually conceive will be awful, we're under a consultant and started taking clomid xx

The further I am every evening the more I feel like it might be the very early start of it, but then it goes away again. Eurgh, just have to hold on for a few more days

@UnicornsandRainbows1 Are you still waiting for the 8th? Xx

@Zoo33 Yup I am. I'll just be relieved when this is all over. The waiting is torture