TTC after pregnancy loss - thread 15 - Christmas miracles

[TheGrumpySquirrel]

New thread!

@HoldTightPretendItsAPlan fingers crossed for you that AF doesn't show, I'm alright I don't think I'll get a bfp this month though, got all my AF symptoms but I guess I can still be a bit hopeful! How you doing? I don't know how you don't test, I'd go crazy!

@AurorasEncore I don't really have any useful advice but I'm sorry for what you're going through. I think you have to push for what you want though so if you feel like you need the laparoscopy then do it. I had an ectopic pregnancy which ruptured and it was the worst experience ever which I almost died from.
@HoldTightPretendItsAPlan oh i don't know! I really hope it's not over for you. I don't temp so not the best person to advise. My af is due Friday I think- although sometimes cycles are slightly longer so maybe Monday. Will text Thursday. Fingers crossed af stays away for us both!

@BrokenBaubles sorry you're bleeding. I hope you get your answers soon. And I'm glad you could move your scan. Still hoping for a miracle for you!

@DaisyMay25 I'm not sure what my symptoms are but I am definitely fantasizing!!

aurora no advice I’m afraid. When I had my EP I’d had stop start bleeding for 10 days before going to the GP. I didn’t even know I was pregnant- no abdominal pain til later. I just thought I’d had an odd period from coming off the pill.

My close friend who was a week ahead of me when I had my MC in December has just had test results back from her 12 week scan and had come back v high for downs. She is devastated and I have very mixed emotions about it. Been in tears telling DH because I really feel for her. I have to remind myself this isn’t about me or our journey and I just have to be supportive to her

Ps baubles so sorry I didn’t see your post. Sending you hugs- will they scan you any sooner?

Thanks @boboelephant and @eastend2015. I did call the EPU yesterday but they still want to wait 2 weeks because they need to see clear change either way. I was off work today with my toddler so I probably had more time to think. I'm busy at work and then the theatre tomorrow. I think keeping busy is the best I can do.

Sorry to leap in- this thread seems lovely. I had a mmc in October- it took ages for my period to come back (it felt that way anyway- only six weeks really).

Anyway according to my app (which have previously been accurate) my period would be due today. It hasn't arrived. A part of me wants to leap around all excited, but I don't want to test too early. Did most people periods come back regular or did it take a few months to settle?

I felt I had come out of the miscarriage relatively unscathed, but feel really anxious I now realise. I worry that even if I test I won't trust it. I have two dc and their pregnancies were mostly blissfully ignorant of the risks. If AF doesn't arrive- when would you test? It seems too early. Gah- sorry so many if the rest of you have gone through this.

@Cookiefiend welcome, although it's always sad that someone joins, in the nicest possible way.

My periods when back to back to regular straight away, but I know everyone is different.

When you test is also up to you, I'm impatient so I'd be testing tomorrow, but I'm terrible for it. Perhaps test on Friday? Fingers crossed it's good news for you anyway.

@Cookiefiend welcome although I'm sorry you have to be here. I agree with Daisy, I would definitely be testing tomorrow. Most of us are testing before af is due as we can't hold out so a day late seems late to me! Fingers crossed for you. I had my MMC in Dec and am now hoping for a bfp with no period so I clearly am impatient!

@Eastend2015 sending hugs. That sounds tough for you and your friend.

@eastend2015 that must be so hard for your friend. Great she's got such an empathetic friend to share it with.

Hmm... thanks @DaisyMay25 and @Boboelephant I will maybe try tomorrow if AF doesn't appear. I have always been so lucky before (three pregnancies each first month of trying- though obvs the last one ended in mc). I can't imagine being that lucky again. And I'm not sure I can take the disappointment if not.

Then on the other hand- not sure I want to worry my way through a pregnancy. Sigh. I suppose it might be better to know either way tomorrow.

Thanks ladies you are all lovely. I don’t feel like an empathetic friend but I’m trying to be! Just need to shut up and allow her to talk about it. DH saying that if it was us, he’d want a TFMR which prompted an anxious rant from me about i’ve already had 3 MC and i’d want any baby and i’m not getting any younger, and this risks are only getting higher etc etc. I’m sorry to bring the thread down and if this is triggering for anyone but I don’t know who I can let this out to if not you lot. Crikey the 2ww always sends me loopy. Where is the sane me from a few days ago?!

Brilliant news flat! Hope the next 2 trimesters go swimmingly for you.

Sorry to hear that baubles glad you got your scan moved up a bit, still such a long time for you to wait ☹

Fyi it's 3 for 2 on pregnancy tests in boots. Obviously I've gone mental and will be serial testing until I believe it's real!

So I've just realised that I'll have to retake the pregnancy test on my due date. Fuck! Is checking out on life an option? Not only this but I don't even know if I'll get that off as my previous boss didn't actually book the holiday that he agreed to so I've had to try and book it again and wait til it's approved. I've also decided that we're going abroad for the due date in June because fuck the world right now. If next time isn't successful I'm jumping off a poxy cliff, no one bloody deserves this stress and upset

@UnicornsandRainbows1 it's sad you feel like that. They say ttc is a happy time in your life but I guess people who say that probably conceive in the first month and have no issues. A holiday sounds like a good idea, maybe it'll be the best time to ttc too, that would be it an extra special holiday! Fingers crossed good luck comes your way soon!

I really need to slap myself for still symptom checking. I've had really bad night sweats the past couple of nights, last night was pretty bad. Internet of course says it's an early sign of pregnancy or menopause (I'm only 26 so I'm ruling that out). Just two more days until I test again.
How's everyone else coping?
@Cookiefiend Let me know how your test goes this morning

@UnicornsandRainbows1 I'm so sorry you're having such a tough time. Have you thought about having some counselling for your losses? My manager referred me to Occ Health at work to get some and I think it'll be really helpful. If work can't arrange it the hospitals usually have bereavement counselling services? I figure it'll help process the grief but also hopefully help any anxiety in the next pregnancy.

@DaisyMay25 fingers crossed!!! I keep doing it too. No night sweats but random back pain that comes and goes, increased sticky CM, bleeding gums.... I so hope all our symptoms are good signs!

Hello everyone, would I be ok to join? Mmc in August when should have been 12 weeks and been trying since but no luck. Not coping very well all my friends (8 of them in total) are pregnant and due at the same time I would have been so no one to talk to. Just dashed January's hopes and come on today.

Congrats flatwhite I remember seeing you on a thread before. Brilliant news :)

@Unicornsandrainbows1 so sorry youre going through this, life is so bloody unfair at times! After my mc i was also feeling wound up, youd think our bodies would be efficient at passing things that aren’t supposed to be staying. I had a little fluid-filled sac that hung around until the day before my scan (hence the neverending cramps where my uterus was trying to expel it). When i felt that pass and the cramps disappeared it was such a relief. Of course it was sad but the whole uncertainty and worry about infection/needing a d&c made it an ordeal. Its a craving for normality and closure. Im so gutted this is dragging out and making you feel shite. Fx it resolves itself and soon. A holiday sounds like a great idea. Hugs

@UnicornsandRainbows1 and @pioe I'm sorry you are both having a tough time. I wish I had some sage advice. Be kind to yourselves. @pioe It sucks that all your friends are pregnant, but I hope it will happen soon for you and you will have the youngest child who makes the others feel all broody.

@DaisyMay25 I chickened out of testing this morning (though getting up late and trying to get everyone up and out the door certainly wouldn't have made it easy). I will let you know when I get the courage up to test / AF arrives. Think I'll just hang around here for a while.

Thanks @Cookiefiend here's hoping :) it's such a hard journey for us all. Losing hope a bit now so I think we're going to have a bit of a break and try again in a couple of months.

@Boboelephant I'm glad I'm not the only crazy one around here... are you testing tomorrow??

@pioe I know how you feel, two close friends of ours have just given birth 3 weeks apart (one was yesterday) I can't help but feel bitter as bad as it is

@Cookiefiend well fingers crossed it's good news soon!
(I'm a little bit strange and enjoy seeing pictures of bfps)

Oh @pioe that's so tough. I hope that you get pregnant soon or manage to have a break if that's what you need and give yourself a rest from worry.
@Cookiefiend you have amazing patience! Let us know how you get on.
@DaisyMay25 yep testing tomorrow although I'm so scared it will be a bfn and I'll be gutted. I wish I could wait until af was late so I could be more positive but I know I can't!! Are you tomorrow or Friday?